This decision is so incredibly demoralizing. I know I'm not special and certainly recognize the past 12 months have been hard on all of us (many, if not most, worse than me), but please bear with the following whinging.
A few years ago, I was diagnosed with major despressive disorder, so you all can imagine what living/working alone has done to my psychological/physical well-being. But I've stuck it out and have had this place as one of my outlets to commiserate and converse with a lot of like-minded, well-intentioned, and intelligent folks. That's something to be grateful for.
Being stressed out, fighting tooth and nail against the Covid misinformation campaign directed against people like my elderly, conservative parents who watch FOX News like their lives depend on it and live(d) in MAGA-land, West Texas, my worse fear came true. Both parents contracted it, and only one survived. Then, six weeks later, our entire state temporarily crumpled under the rubble of Republican deregulated delusion. All of this was entirely avoidable but utterly predictable.
Last week, I finally got that first dose and was beginning to feel optimistic about our course. Mother, sister, and daughter have all had their second dose. Spring is coming. The weather is warming. Doses are increasing. The economy is improving. We'll finally get to see our co-workers in 3D once again. Everything is looking up.
And then this...
It's like having an addict friend or family member who continuously pulls the rug out from under themselves, repeatedly shattering all hope for recovery in a cycle of constant self-destruction. We all need to go to some sort of Al-Anon type Citizens-Who-Give-A-Shit meeting in the short-term and attend Brink-of-Societal-Collapse PTSD therapy sessions over the long.
Whinging concluded.