OK, back in the 90s...
[what follows is fiction written in the first person]
I was in the Nat'l Guard. Had been a 19D Cav Scout, moved to a new state and they needed dudes in the motor pool, so I joined the motor pool. Learned how to work on Humvees and also learned the details of motor pool clerk-work.
As a side-hustle, Nat'l Guard style, I worked as Opposing Force, OPFOR, ie pretend to be the enemy for training exercises and get paid for it.
So one day, as OPFOR, this fucking idiot lieutenant decided to throw a grenade simulator in my hole to "wake me up." My ass was already awake, and I took note of which Humvee this fucking idiot lieutenant was driving.
So early in the morning, I strolled into motor pool, and did this thing I'd learned as a sometime Motor Pool Clerk, where a third person, usually a flunky, signs for the officer's vehicle, as in, flunky mode, to fetch it for him. I wrote in his name, and scrawled my own unintelligibly.
Then I crawled up in his Humvee, let the glow plug warm up, cranked it up, and tooled west about a mile in a deserted part of the base where I turned down a side road, and parked that bitch.
For about a week.
I saw his fucking idiot ass walking around for about a week, puzzled look on his face.
After that, me and a buddy went and got it, dropped it off near the motor pool. Thumped some keys on the desk and bopped off with no paperwork.
[/fiction]