So the good news is the brain tumor they found is tiny. About 7mm by 6. They found it on an MRI they ordered because I had a weird loss of fine control in my left hand. Doc said usually it'd have to grow for a year more before anybody noticed, but I guess I'm like the Princess and the Pea.
Anyway, the good stuff is I get to meet the doctor who runs the Gamma Knife, where they strap me into a Star Wars headset and they zap me with a tiny precise bolt of radiation, then I leave the office and eat some biscuits and gravy.
No telling how long this little tumor has been there, and just now leaned on some nerves. Funny thing is, yesterday I noticed that my hand worked fine, like nothing had happened. Maybe the goblins took a break, or else my brain set up some alternate routes.