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Featured Replies

13 minutes ago, Tylerocks said:

The wife and a friend ate edibles and went to the Museum, went to Hugo's for Margaritas etc.  They've been gone since 1.

They just got back here hammered,with a bunch of snacks, wine and firewood...watching tik tok vids, playing music.... and with apparent plans to commandeer the living room....just in time for the game.

 

FML, I'll be upstairs.

 

Upstairs?  I love Texas football as much as anyone but this seems like your chance at a threesome.

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8 minutes ago, txhorns said:

Upstairs?  I love Texas football as much as anyone but this seems like your chance at a threesome.

Would anyone fault him for missing the game for a threesome? I wouldn’t 

55 minutes ago, tbone_ said:

Should have gotten the one with the built in griddle on the top. Had one of those and it was awesome for grilled cheeses. 

The middle burner is oblong and is perfect for heating the separate rectangular griddle:

 

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5 hours ago, Js1 said:

Would anyone fault him for missing the game for a threesome? I wouldn’t 

Well, before the game...not a chance.  But now???

7 hours ago, Beau Vine said:

Well, before the game...not a chance.  But now???

He posted an hour before the game started.  Plenty of time to get the threesome in and still watch the game.  Plus these occasions are exactly what halftime is for.

On 11/28/2025 at 5:40 PM, Js1 said:

Would anyone fault him for missing the game for a threesome? I wouldn’t 

I completely blew off my 25th High School reunion (with a few people I actually care about) for a threesome with my gf and a chick we picked up in a bar.  No regrets.

On 11/29/2025 at 6:33 AM, txhorns said:

He posted an hour before the game started.  Plenty of time to get the threesome in and still watch the game.  Plus these occasions are exactly what halftime is for.

Your wife is one lucky lady!

I was hanging a heavy mirror. After placing the mounting screw in the second location, I prepared to lift said mirror into position. 
Mrs. NNM:  You want me to help you get it up?

NNM:

uh-yeah-yeah.gif

Edited by nnm

On 11/27/2025 at 6:18 PM, Kennythetiger said:

If I ever remodel my kitchen I would love to have two ovens. 

King in the castle! King in the castle! I have a chair!

On 11/29/2025 at 6:30 PM, After irth said:

I completely blew off my 25th High School reunion (with a few people I actually care about) for a threesome with my gf and a chick we picked up in a bar.  No regrets.

uh-yeah-yeah.gif

On 11/27/2025 at 6:18 PM, Kennythetiger said:

If I ever remodel my kitchen I would love to have two ovens. 

You should get two dishwashers...

4 minutes ago, PvilleStang said:

You should get two dishwashers...

Who the hell wants to be married to two women?

36 minutes ago, PvilleStang said:

You should get two dishwashers...

Absolutely not. The one I have is expensive enough. 

18 hours ago, Beau Vine said:

No idea, and I have learned not to ask:

It's close to empty so she's storing it upside down to get all the lotion out.

47 minutes ago, Judge Roybeanbag said:

Challenge accepted!

Fucker. You made me laugh out loud in a coffee shop. 

1 hour ago, Mittens said:

It's close to empty so she's storing it upside down to get all the lotion out.

Yeah, but we live in Colorado, so there's a bottle of lotion in every room in the house.

She's just trying to save you some money, BV!  

14 minutes ago, Mittens said:

She's just trying to save you some money, BV!  

For real. This isn’t the wives that are financially responsible thread. As if there could be such a thing. 

6 hours ago, Beau Vine said:

Yeah, but we live in Colorado, so there's a bottle of lotion in every room in the house.

 

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They feel the second most stressed when their husband does anything. 

5 hours ago, tbone_ said:

They feel the second most stressed when their husband does anything. 

... particularly if he is carrying a tool, a musical instrument, or a piece of sports gear.

 

10 minutes ago, Tex Long said:

... particularly if he is carrying a tool, a musical instrument, or a piece of sports gear.

 

For me, it’s reading a book. She can’t stand when I sit quietly and read a book. 

15 minutes ago, nnm said:

For me, it’s reading a book. She can’t stand when I sit quietly and read a book. 

PM Coach Beard

On 12/2/2025 at 11:06 AM, Mittens said:

She's just trying to save you some money, BV!  

It has been there for two weeks.  She just left today for a week in Texas, and it's still there.

On 12/2/2025 at 10:06 AM, Mittens said:

She's just trying to save you some money, BV!  

My wife will empty a bottle of lotion, use the last bit of toothpaste. Because those pennies saved can go towards a pair of Kate Spade shoes.

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Got home from the office the other day, was fixing something to eat and swept a few items into the disposal. Reached over to flip the switch on and it was already on.  Disposal had tripped the thermal breaker so I reset that, no dice.  Turned it with the Allen wrench in the bottom, barely turns.  
 

I get a blank stare as I ask if she used the disposal. Clearly she turned it on and left it on. I think the bearings are jacked. 
 

so this weekend I’ll replace the disposal. 

21 hours ago, tbone_ said:

They feel the second most stressed when their husband does anything. 

Counter-argument: I get the most stressed when I hear her grabbing tools and trying to attempt any project.

2 hours ago, PvilleStang said:

Counter-argument: I get the most stressed when I hear her grabbing tools and trying to attempt any project.

That’s just a passive aggressive way to get you to do it. At least it is in my house. 

16 hours ago, CycleTex87 said:

Got home from the office the other day, was fixing something to eat and swept a few items into the disposal. Reached over to flip the switch on and it was already on.  Disposal had tripped the thermal breaker so I reset that, no dice.  Turned it with the Allen wrench in the bottom, barely turns.  
 

I get a blank stare as I ask if she used the disposal. Clearly she turned it on and left it on. I think the bearings are jacked. 
 

so this weekend I’ll replace the disposal. 

She could have left a pot on the stove and burned the house down.  Take it as a “W”.

2 hours ago, tbone_ said:

That’s just a passive aggressive way to get you to do it. At least it is in my house. 

Mine will flat out take the tools and do it herself.  Problem is she's very much of the mindset if it works, she'll use it.  As in: if a block of wood is sufficient, she'll use it as a hammer.  Or if my best chef knife can cut a bagel, then it MUST be a bagel knife. So our paring knife is dull as hell, many a screw is cammed out using the wrong screw driver, and all the paint can lids are dented to hell and never put back on correctly from prying them open using whatever can be found.

1 hour ago, ABSR said:

She could have left a pot on the stove and burned the house down.  Take it as a “W”.

Too soon

3 hours ago, PvilleStang said:

Mine will flat out take the tools and do it herself.  Problem is she's very much of the mindset if it works, she'll use it.  As in: if a block of wood is sufficient, she'll use it as a hammer.  Or if my best chef knife can cut a bagel, then it MUST be a bagel knife. So our paring knife is dull as hell, many a screw is cammed out using the wrong screw driver, and all the paint can lids are dented to hell and never put back on correctly from prying them open using whatever can be found.

 

I caught mine trying to cut a dowel rod using a pair of wire snips. 

 

 

On 11/28/2025 at 4:17 PM, Underdog said:

We even have a 4- slice toaster, we’re the Jefferson’s moving on up. 

The Jeferson's what moving on up?

On 12/1/2025 at 3:46 PM, Beau Vine said:

No idea, and I have learned not to ask:

20251201_144414.thumb.jpg.a13e78598ed87348ac62f5f335847339.jpg

 

20251201_144414.thumb.jpg.a13e78598ed87348ac62f5f335847339.jpg

7 hours ago, TrashMaster G said:

The Jeferson's what moving on up?

*Jefferson's...busted.

...to the east side. To a deluxe apartment in the sky.

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"Our grandkids are going to learn how ro swim before they get in the pool" 

nathan fillion castle GIF

On 12/3/2025 at 6:53 PM, Beau Vine said:

It has been there for two weeks.  She just left today for a week in Texas, and it's still there.

So you can put it to good use

On 12/6/2025 at 12:02 AM, ROFL BOX said:

 

20251201_144414.thumb.jpg.a13e78598ed87348ac62f5f335847339.jpg

I understand her reasoning.  The pump lotion bottles wont get a good third of the lotion in the bottom of the bottle. 
A better solution is to cut the bottle off at the mid point when the pump stops working.  She can then get that lotion out with her hand. Just cover it with Saran Wrap. 
 

That’s what I do with the Trader Joe’s lotion we use. Because those bottles are clear, you can see how much you’d be throwing away when the pump stops working. 1 minute with a pocket knife solves the problem.IMG_1535.thumb.jpeg.573c49cdf9c02012377ff87cac03acdf.jpeg

Edited by nnm

Wife on a school night - watching Stranger Things with the kids until 10PM. 

Wife on the weekend - telling the kids no more screen time after 8:30, in bed by 9:30.

 

Also, after the kids are in bed, she brings her computer into my daughter's room to ask if she wants something on Amazon.

 

My stance for a while was "you have to ask mommy". From now on, I'll be the one controlling the TV remote and setting the bed times.

My favorite is when she and the boy are in the living room all morning and early afternoon on like a Sunday, both on their devices doing nothing. Then she gets ready to leave to do something like shopping, and as she walks out the door "make sure he's not on screens all day". 

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