Jump to content
View in the app

A better way to browse. Learn more.

Surly Horns

A full-screen app on your home screen with push notifications, badges and more.

To install this app on iOS and iPadOS
  1. Tap the Share icon in Safari
  2. Scroll the menu and tap Add to Home Screen.
  3. Tap Add in the top-right corner.
To install this app on Android
  1. Tap the 3-dot menu (⋮) in the top-right corner of the browser.
  2. Tap Add to Home screen or Install app.
  3. Confirm by tapping Install.
Football ... Basketball ... Baseball ... Other Sports ... Futbol ... 🤫995🤫 ... Gambling ... Movies & TV ... Music ... Hobbies ... Lulz ... Food & Travel ... Daily Texan ... Business & Markets ... Cloak Room ... Help ... For Sale ... Board Discussion ... Advertise... Tailgate Donations

Featured Replies

  • Replies 23.8k
  • Views 2.2m
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Most Popular Posts

  • Buddy sent a text today...said his wife decided to shop vac their fireplace and clean up all the ash. When she finished, she turned around and didn’t realize the shop vac lid wasn’t really seated, so

  • BearCountry11
    BearCountry11

    From earlier this evening...   My father in law lost his cell phone on the golf course this afternoon.  It was raining so we didn’t have much hope it would still be working but he shares the

Posted Images

Is she planning to make them out of plastic? Because inventing a single-use disposable plastic product seems about as smart as investing in print media. 
She should make them out of fruit roll -ups so that they can be eaten when they're done with the drink.
40 minutes ago, Modessit said:
3 hours ago, WhatTheBuck said:
Is she planning to make them out of plastic? Because inventing a single-use disposable plastic product seems about as smart as investing in print media. 

She should make them out of fruit roll -ups so that they can be eaten when they're done with the drink.

What’s to make? Just use one. They make for good dental dams too. 

see the part that makes me sad is that she could make something that would actually help mankind.....

like a sensor that detects red lights coming up ahead and flashes a display on the windshield that says "you can stop accelerating now."

or underwear that filters farts

Edited by mulletpelini

37 minutes ago, mulletpelini said:

like a sensor that detects red lights coming up ahead and flashes a display on the windshield that says "you can stop accelerating now."

guinnessbrilliant-vi.jpg

1 hour ago, mulletpelini said:

see the part that makes me sad is that she could make something that would actually help mankind.....

like a sensor that detects red lights coming up ahead and flashes a display on the windshield that says "you can stop accelerating now."

Like the Walk indicators that have a countdown?

see the part that makes me sad is that she could make something that would actually help mankind.....

like a sensor that detects red lights coming up ahead and flashes a display on the windshield that says "you can stop accelerating now."

or underwear that filters farts

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.boomsbeat.com/amp/articles/169509/20161111/top-5-best-charcoal-underwear-for-flatulence-for-sale-2016.htm

 

Top 5 Best charcoal underwear for flatulence for sale 2016

 

Coal fired underpants are an environmental nightmare. How do you dispose of them?

11 hours ago, txhorns said:

We also don't know if online ads would work

"Dammit we are fucked!"

-99.9% of the Internets

Coal fired underpants are an environmental nightmare. How do you dispose of them?


Put them in the Groker.
9 hours ago, Upgrayedd said:

Like the Walk indicators that have a countdown?

 

No, he said to slow down. Those are so you know to speed up. 

On 6/4/2019 at 8:45 AM, Trey3216 said:

Sunday Morning, 11:30am

Me:  Hey babe, I gotta run to Home Depot to see if they have this thing.

Wife:  I wanna go too!   (still laying in bed, which means at least 30 minutes of waiting before departure)  I saw this thing on Pinterest.. 

Me: {Rolls eyes, stops listening}  

How was the garden dept?

Totally withdraw, remand, and redact the above statement. As soon as I wrote it, I went straight  there. And it's garden Center. 

Flowers are nice.

1 hour ago, Nolacycling said:

How was the garden dept?

Disappointingly low on yoga pant MILFs

9 hours ago, Nolacycling said:

Totally withdraw, remand, and redact the above statement. As soon as I wrote it, I went straight  there. And it's garden Center. 

Flowers are nice.

giphy.gif

On 6/6/2019 at 9:16 AM, luke duke said:

 


As someone in the comments stated, everyone from Utah is a blond, white, Mormon with a degree from BYU. So in order to distinguish themselves they give their kids dumb names that are derived by taking a syllable from 3 normal names and mashing them together.

 

Sounds kind of.....blek?

12 hours ago, KeysPhoneWallet said:

My wife won’t watch the game with me. I’m sick of her shit.

Why do you want her to? 

12 hours ago, KeysPhoneWallet said:

My wife won’t watch the game with me. I’m sick of her shit.

So she can ask stupid questions while she's crushing candy?

Jesus, dude. Enjoy the peace and quiet.

12 hours ago, KeysPhoneWallet said:

My wife won’t watch the game with me. I’m sick of her shit.

Defeated!

1 hour ago, KeysPhoneWallet said:

She understands b-ball well and it is much better when she is into it.

She knows your username, huh?

22 minutes ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

Yeah, it’s not much fun if you have to chloroform them

But it's better than nothing. 

11 hours ago, KeysPhoneWallet said:

She understands b-ball well and it is much better when she is into it.

There are lots of things that are better when she is into it.

11 hours ago, KeysPhoneWallet said:

She understands b-ball well and it is much better when she is into it.

What basketball game are you talking about?  NBA Finals?

  • Popular Post

My wife was freaking out today because her phone wasn't working.  Even walked down the street to borrow her friends phone to call me 7 straight times while I'm in a meeting.  I excused myself from the meeting and answered.  Told her I would look at it tonight when I got home.  I got home and she has supposedly tried everything to get it to work, well except for plugging the charger into the wall.

On 6/16/2019 at 9:25 PM, KeysPhoneWallet said:

She understands b-ball well and it is much better when she is into it.

Oh she was into some balls last night. 

23 minutes ago, MNLonghornFUKM said:
30 minutes ago, TonyTexas said:
Who's wife is this?D9bsGWRXYAEsHuB.jpg

Mother of god...

Problem solver right there. 

 

Who's wife is this?D9bsGWRXYAEsHuB.jpg
This is why New Jerseyans aren't allowed to pump their own gas
1 hour ago, elfenix said:
3 hours ago, TonyTexas said:
Who's wife is this?D9bsGWRXYAEsHuB.jpg

This is why New Jerseyans aren't allowed to pump their own gas

Idk it screams Florida to me. 

54 minutes ago, Js1 said:

Idk it screams Florida to me. 

Looks Marylandish to me.

 

If not, it's right before you get to Seaside Heights/Park on the mainland side.  

Edited by Trey3216

Wawa is Philly/New Jersey. Decent cheap sandwiches in their stores too.

Just now, elfenix said:

Wawa is Philly/New Jersey. Decent cheap sandwiches in their stores too.

They've expanded 

  • Popular Post
31 minutes ago, Trey3216 said:

They've expanded 

Most wives do after marriage.

On 6/17/2019 at 9:09 PM, txhorns said:

My wife was freaking out today because her phone wasn't working.  Even walked down the street to borrow her friends phone to call me 7 straight times while I'm in a meeting.  I excused myself from the meeting and answered.  Told her I would look at it tonight when I got home.  I got home and she has supposedly tried everything to get it to work, well except for plugging the charger into the wall.

The dumb is strong to quite skrong in this one.

16 hours ago, elfenix said:

Wawa is Philly/New Jersey. Decent cheap sandwiches in their stores too.

They are all over Florida too, expanded for where there clientele spends the winters. Just for the record I have seen people backed up like that when the pumps are full and someone on one of the front ones is hanging over too much so you can’t quite get to it. Not saying that’s the case here though since there is a female involved.

We are replacing the appliances in a rental we are selling. Wife posted pics on Facetron and had been doing all the communication.

She set up for the fridge to be picked up today and casually asks me to bring my 9 mm. Who the hell have you been talking to?

5 minutes ago, T’Boo Ted Marshall said:

We are replacing the appliances in a rental we are selling. Wife posted pics on Facetron and had been doing all the communication.

She set up for the fridge to be picked up today and casually asks me to bring my 9 mm. Who the hell have you been talking to?

Confused fridge and Ruby ridge?

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...
Football ... Basketball ... Baseball ... Other Sports ... Futbol ... 🤫995🤫 ... Gambling ... Movies & TV ... Music ... Hobbies ... Lulz ... Food & Travel ... Daily Texan ... Business & Markets ... Cloak Room ... Help ... For Sale ... Board Discussion ... Advertise... Tailgate Donations

Configure browser push notifications

Chrome (Android)
  1. Tap the lock icon next to the address bar.
  2. Tap Permissions → Notifications.
  3. Adjust your preference.
Chrome (Desktop)
  1. Click the padlock icon in the address bar.
  2. Select Site settings.
  3. Find Notifications and adjust your preference.