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  • Buddy sent a text today...said his wife decided to shop vac their fireplace and clean up all the ash. When she finished, she turned around and didn’t realize the shop vac lid wasn’t really seated, so

  • BearCountry11
    BearCountry11

    From earlier this evening...   My father in law lost his cell phone on the golf course this afternoon.  It was raining so we didn’t have much hope it would still be working but he shares the

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8 minutes ago, Kennythetiger said:

Hope it didn’t tear the pillow. 

I'm sure there are 873 replacements.

My wife just broke my Cole Hamels shadow box with a throw pillow. That is all.

What are you doing with Cole Hamels throw pillow? Most people collect a baseball, card, glove, hat or jersey!
4 hours ago, huge said:

Just catching up.  Regarding saving Trixie from embarrassment... very early in the relationship I was with the GF now wife and she answered her phone with 

"this is her"

My face must have looked like I had just been kicked in the balls by a farting donkey.  Afterwards she asked me what that was about and I said "this is she" is the way to say that.  If you say it the way you just did anyone with any sense is going to think you are an idiot.

I said it in a nice way and said I just wanted her to look her best to any and everyone.  And she changed it that day.

 

Probably the last time she actually listened to me and took life lesson advice.

But hey, we will always have Paris.

I think the key here is your relationship status when she actually took your advice. 

  • Popular Post

I was talking with my sil, typhoon mary, and she couldn't remember the word "karma," and instead used "aroma." My son chimes in, "Hey, aroma's a bitch, isn't it." And she just said "yeah" and kept telling her story. 

Can your son start a metal detector thread somewhere?

17 minutes ago, Sam Lin said:

Can your son start a metal detector thread somewhere?

Who was the original metal detector guy?  I remember the thread, but not who started it. 

16 minutes ago, Kennythetiger said:

Who was the original metal detector guy?  I remember the thread, but not who started it. 

King Neptune. It was such a great thread. 

I believe "and things like that" has officially replaced "et cetera" in all women's vocabulary.

Sent from my SM-G975U using Tapatalk



I can’t believe my wife is pushing fifty and still says “like” so much. It’s as if I have another teenager in the house some days.

I don’t know how many years it has been over multiple sites but I still get so excited when I see Mitch post in this thread.

Holy crap I went and looked at when I joined TOS and it will be ten years in April. [emoji15]

  • Popular Post

Rookie.

Driving back home from New Mexico recently, she's surfing on her phone I'm listening to sports talk radio

.....blah blah blah NBA Basketball blah blah blah Sacramento Kings blah blah blah.......

Out of the corner of my eye I see her head move up away from her phone, I can tell she's gonna ask me a question.

and here we go

H: "Sacramental Kings sure seems like an odd name for a basketball team doesn't it?"

M: "You're absolutely right."

3 minutes ago, mulletpelini said:

Rookie.

Driving back home from New Mexico recently, she's surfing on her phone I'm listening to sports talk radio

.....blah blah blah NBA Basketball blah blah blah Sacramento Kings blah blah blah.......

Out of the corner of my eye I see her head move up away from her phone, I can tell she's gonna ask me a question.

and here we go

H: "Sacramental Kings sure seems like an odd name for a basketball team doesn't it?"

M: "You're absolutely right."

In her defense - it's easy to forget that Sacramento exists. 

On 11/16/2021 at 12:19 PM, huge said:

Just catching up.  Regarding saving Trixie from embarrassment... very early in the relationship I was with the GF now wife and she answered her phone with 

"this is her"

My face must have looked like I had just been kicked in the balls by a farting donkey.  Afterwards she asked me what that was about and I said "this is she" is the way to say that.  If you say it the way you just did anyone with any sense is going to think you are an idiot.

I said it in a nice way and said I just wanted her to look her best to any and everyone.  And she changed it that day.

 

Probably the last time she actually listened to me and took life lesson advice.

But hey, we will always have Paris.

Wtf???

I swear Mrs CL is a hypochondriac. 

This morning I dropped her off at physical therapy (for what?) and she produced a bowl of oatmeal from the backseat and took it inside. 

 

Edited by crimsonlonghorn

14 hours ago, Buzzrock said:

Holy crap I went and looked at when I joined TOS and it will be ten years in April. emoji15.png

Mine was Dec 7th, 2008 - while drinking heavily 

 

Fuck that day

35 minutes ago, Jameslaw121 said:

Mine was Dec 7th, 2008 - while drinking heavily 

 

Fuck that day

Pearl Harbor day seems apropos. 

Apologies for longcat, but this is actually a condensed version.

 

Wife ran out of gas on the way to take the kids to daycare.  Less than 2 blocks away.  She also drives an older Prius.  I was on a work call already so didn't see her text, so she marches the kids home, grabs my keys, and drives the kids over.  By this time I'm off the call, so instead of her taking an Uber into the office downtown I offer to drive her.  She pulls in the driveway and was super confused when I walked to the driver's side, gas can in hand.  

Wife: "What are you doing?"

Me: "Driving you to the office.  Changing drivers is a pain in the ass downtown.  Where am I headed towards?"

Wife: "Oh, head towards Mopac."

Me (thinking): "No shit, from southwest Austin to get to downtown I should go up Mopac..."

Me: "What cross streets is the office on?"

Wife: "Take the 5th street exit."

Me: "Well, at least you didn't get very far and could walk home.  Sorry I didn't see your text.  How'd you run out of gas?"

Wife: "Oh, the gas gauge hasn't been working for a while, it never reads more than 2 out of 8 bars.  So normally I get 360 miles to the tank, but I was only at 320 today before the screen flashed *PROBLEM* and the check engine light came on, and the engine stopped.  Also, the low tire light is still on.  I've never run out of gas before."

Me (thinking): "Sweet.  That would have been good to know prior to this happening.  Hope the battery didn't get run down to the point of being toast.  Don't tell her she probably could have driven home.  Battery will get toasted next time."

Me: "Ok, I'll get some gas in it and get it home, I don't have any more calls this morning.  I just filled up the tires last weekend so I'll make sure there isn't a leak."

Wife: "Oh, turn here, turn here!"

Me: "I thought you said take 5th?"

Wife: "No, the other one....to the right."

Me: "Cesar Chavez?"

Wife: "Yes, that one.  Sorry, that's why I wanted to you to get over one lane."

Me: "What cross streets is your office at, again?"

Wife: "8th and Congress.  No, don't turn here!!!" (as I make a left on Lavaca).

Me: "Oh, I thought I'd skip that traffic at the Congress light and head up to 7th.  Shouldn't be any line to turn left on Congress up there.  What corner is your office on?"

Wife: "I never go this way."

Me: "What corner is your office on?"

Wife: "Northeast."

Me: "What time is your last call?  Did you want me to try and pick you up before I get the kids, or are you going to Uber home?" 

*At this point I pulled over at the northeast corner of 8th and Congress*

Wife: "It's not over til 4:30, so I'll Uber.  (She looks up from her phone) This isn't my office, it's over there (points at southwest corner of 9th).  Oh well, I can walk I guess."

 

I had a very relaxing drive home listening to a podcast.  I then was able to put 10 gallons of gas into what is normally an 8 gallon fill-up.  Cleared the check engine light, took the car for a test drive, battery looked like it was at about 80% prior to the test drive so should be OK there.  Checked the tires, all were right where I filled the to the other weekend.  Tried resetting the monitoring system, problem light still flashes on key on for 1 min prior to light staying on.  Google it, says it needs further diagnosis by a tech, usually a sensor.

via text:

Me: "Hey, car is fine.  I got it fueled up and home.  Tire pressure was ok.  There is probably a bad sensor, that happens sometimes when tires get rotated or the sensor battery gets old."

Wife: "Told you I need a new car."

Me: "You need a new car because a $3 sensor went bad?"

 

Amazingly I didn't hear any further response.  

10 minutes ago, drt said:

Me: "I thought you said take 5th?"

Wife: "No, the other one....to the right."

Me: "Cesar Chavez?"

Wife: "Yes, that one.  Sorry, that's why I wanted to you to get over one lane."

Me: "What cross streets is your office at, again?"

Wife: "8th and Congress.  No, don't turn here!!!" (as I make a left on Lavaca).

Saying the correct exit then correcting it to the wrong one is gold. 

Part of that’s on you. There is no way I’m driving a female anywhere and letting her give directions as we drive. Tell me where your destination is or my car isn’t moving.

  • Popular Post

Fuck I didn’t know your wife was going to write the story. 

3 minutes ago, justhookit said:

Part of that’s on you. There is no way I’m driving a female anywhere and letting her give directions as we drive. Tell me where your destination is or my car isn’t moving.

This is true. If I was married, at least. If it's a girl I'm still trying to close on I might play along because it isn't really about the destination. 

30 minutes ago, drt said:

Me: "What corner is your office on?"

Wife: "Northeast."

I've never heard of a woman that uses cardinal directions. You sure she ain't a dude?

4 minutes ago, Sandman said:

I've never heard of a woman that uses cardinal directions. You sure she ain't a dude?

At this point she knows if I ask that question I expect an answer in terms of N, S, E, W.  Which is why she dodged the question first time, because she actually had no clue.

And point taken about known destination.  But I wasn't the person that was going to be late to a meeting due to shitty directions.

1 hour ago, Kennythetiger said:

Fuck I didn’t know your wife was going to write the story. 

This is the correct take

  • Popular Post

So we're sitting on the couch last night, compiling our Christmas gift shopping list for extended family..she becomes noticeably frustrated about something, so I glance over at her laptop and see a bunch of Frozen-related images on a Google search. There are zero young girls in either of our families, so at this point I have no idea what she's actually looking for.

Her: Ugh, what's the name of that record player I bought you? Sven and Olaf Something?

Me: [smirking] Bang & Olufsen.

Her: Don't laugh, I was close!

Me: Yeah, it was a good guess...I'll Let it Go.

26 minutes ago, SuperSport said:

So we're sitting on the couch last night, compiling our Christmas gift shopping list for extended family..she becomes noticeably frustrated about something, so I glance over at her laptop and see a bunch of Frozen-related images on a Google search. There are zero young girls in either of our families, so at this point I have no idea what she's actually looking for.

Her: Ugh, what's the name of that record player I bought you? Sven and Olaf Something?

Me: [smirking] Bang & Olufsen.

Her: Don't laugh, I was close!

Me: Yeah, it was a good guess...I'll Let it Go.

Surprised you didn’t end up with a pool table.

3 hours ago, drt said:

Apologies for longcat, but this is actually a condensed version.

 

Wife ran out of gas on the way to take the kids to daycare.  Less than 2 blocks away.  She also drives an older Prius.  I was on a work call already so didn't see her text, so she marches the kids home, grabs my keys, and drives the kids over.  By this time I'm off the call, so instead of her taking an Uber into the office downtown I offer to drive her.  She pulls in the driveway and was super confused when I walked to the driver's side, gas can in hand.  

Wife: "What are you doing?"

Me: "Driving you to the office.  Changing drivers is a pain in the ass downtown.  Where am I headed towards?"

Wife: "Oh, head towards Mopac."

Me (thinking): "No shit, from southwest Austin to get to downtown I should go up Mopac..."

Me: "What cross streets is the office on?"

Wife: "Take the 5th street exit."

Me: "Well, at least you didn't get very far and could walk home.  Sorry I didn't see your text.  How'd you run out of gas?"

Wife: "Oh, the gas gauge hasn't been working for a while, it never reads more than 2 out of 8 bars.  So normally I get 360 miles to the tank, but I was only at 320 today before the screen flashed *PROBLEM* and the check engine light came on, and the engine stopped.  Also, the low tire light is still on.  I've never run out of gas before."

Me (thinking): "Sweet.  That would have been good to know prior to this happening.  Hope the battery didn't get run down to the point of being toast.  Don't tell her she probably could have driven home.  Battery will get toasted next time."

Me: "Ok, I'll get some gas in it and get it home, I don't have any more calls this morning.  I just filled up the tires last weekend so I'll make sure there isn't a leak."

Wife: "Oh, turn here, turn here!"

Me: "I thought you said take 5th?"

Wife: "No, the other one....to the right."

Me: "Cesar Chavez?"

Wife: "Yes, that one.  Sorry, that's why I wanted to you to get over one lane."

Me: "What cross streets is your office at, again?"

Wife: "8th and Congress.  No, don't turn here!!!" (as I make a left on Lavaca).

Me: "Oh, I thought I'd skip that traffic at the Congress light and head up to 7th.  Shouldn't be any line to turn left on Congress up there.  What corner is your office on?"

Wife: "I never go this way."

Me: "What corner is your office on?"

Wife: "Northeast."

Me: "What time is your last call?  Did you want me to try and pick you up before I get the kids, or are you going to Uber home?" 

*At this point I pulled over at the northeast corner of 8th and Congress*

Wife: "It's not over til 4:30, so I'll Uber.  (She looks up from her phone) This isn't my office, it's over there (points at southwest corner of 9th).  Oh well, I can walk I guess."

 

I had a very relaxing drive home listening to a podcast.  I then was able to put 10 gallons of gas into what is normally an 8 gallon fill-up.  Cleared the check engine light, took the car for a test drive, battery looked like it was at about 80% prior to the test drive so should be OK there.  Checked the tires, all were right where I filled the to the other weekend.  Tried resetting the monitoring system, problem light still flashes on key on for 1 min prior to light staying on.  Google it, says it needs further diagnosis by a tech, usually a sensor.

via text:

Me: "Hey, car is fine.  I got it fueled up and home.  Tire pressure was ok.  There is probably a bad sensor, that happens sometimes when tires get rotated or the sensor battery gets old."

Wife: "Told you I need a new car."

Me: "You need a new car because a $3 sensor went bad?"

 

Amazingly I didn't hear any further response.  

Twice in the 30 years we’ve been married, Mrs. NNM has mentioned that she thinks she needs new tires, and within a week, she’s the owner of a new car. It’s made sense both times. 

12 hours ago, drt said:

condensed version... wife, Prius, ran out of fuel...

Fuck all of that... I'm getting 2 gallons of gas into the Prius that's 2 blocks away from the house & leaving her with the car.

Check out all the other shit later.

Need to wait a few days on this. Just in case

(I had posted update on shit money. Just occurred to me banker who I worked with could know someone in here or be on here)

6 minutes ago, kmac30 said:

Need to wait a few days on this. Just in case

(I had posted update on shit money. Just occurred to me banker who I worked with could know someone in here or be on here)

Tease GIF by Shark Week

2 hours ago, Anwar Namtut said:

Drt doesn’t know where his wife works?

They used to office at 15th and Guad. They moved office buildings a month or two ago and she’s obviously really good with directions, addresses, and transportation in general. 

  • Popular Post

Wife was trying to spin this god awful Texas football season.

”At least we’ll get higher draft picks.” 
 

 

 

37670455-FB7F-4BE0-AE3E-01C663ACB96B.gif

Edited by NAVY

On 11/20/2021 at 10:06 AM, Anwar Namtut said:

Drt doesn’t know where his wife works?

The streetcorners rotate.

On 11/20/2021 at 10:06 AM, Anwar Namtut said:

Drt doesn’t know where his wife works?

 

On 11/20/2021 at 10:13 AM, Grade of D as in David said:

To be fair his wife didn't know which corner she works on either

The situation is seminal, corners subject to change on short notice.

I like to read. A lot. After dinner and cleanup, Mrs. NNM would rather watch tv.

Sometimes she’ll sit beside me as I read instead of going into the family room to turn on the tv. That’s nice—a little camaraderie is a good thing. However, when that happens, it’s impossible to read. I’ll get three sentences in, she’ll comment about such-and-such, and of course needs affirmation about her comment. I’ll calmly set my book and reading glasses down, and engage in the conversation she wants. As a good husband does. 

I’ll wait until there’s a nice long pause, then re-open my book and put my glasses back on. I’ll go back over the same 3 sentences to figure out where I was. Then she comments about this-and-that. I’ll calmly set my book and reading glasses down, and engage in the conversation she wants. As a good husband does.

Rinse and repeat. 

BTW, I don’t read much fiction. But “The Power Of The Dog,” by Thomas Savage, is fantastic. A gritty western tale in the vein of Steinbeck or Cormac McCarthy. At least it seems like it is—I get only a few sentences in at a time. 

On 11/19/2021 at 1:05 PM, drt said:

Apologies for longcat, but this is actually a condensed version.

 

Wife ran out of gas on the way to take the kids to daycare.  Less than 2 blocks away.  She also drives an older Prius.  I was on a work call already so didn't see her text, so she marches the kids home, grabs my keys, and drives the kids over.  By this time I'm off the call, so instead of her taking an Uber into the office downtown I offer to drive her.  She pulls in the driveway and was super confused when I walked to the driver's side, gas can in hand.  

Wife: "What are you doing?"

Me: "Driving you to the office.  Changing drivers is a pain in the ass downtown.  Where am I headed towards?"

Wife: "Oh, head towards Mopac."

Me (thinking): "No shit, from southwest Austin to get to downtown I should go up Mopac..."

Me: "What cross streets is the office on?"

Wife: "Take the 5th street exit."

Me: "Well, at least you didn't get very far and could walk home.  Sorry I didn't see your text.  How'd you run out of gas?"

Wife: "Oh, the gas gauge hasn't been working for a while, it never reads more than 2 out of 8 bars.  So normally I get 360 miles to the tank, but I was only at 320 today before the screen flashed *PROBLEM* and the check engine light came on, and the engine stopped.  Also, the low tire light is still on.  I've never run out of gas before."

Me (thinking): "Sweet.  That would have been good to know prior to this happening.  Hope the battery didn't get run down to the point of being toast.  Don't tell her she probably could have driven home.  Battery will get toasted next time."

Me: "Ok, I'll get some gas in it and get it home, I don't have any more calls this morning.  I just filled up the tires last weekend so I'll make sure there isn't a leak."

Wife: "Oh, turn here, turn here!"

Me: "I thought you said take 5th?"

Wife: "No, the other one....to the right."

Me: "Cesar Chavez?"

Wife: "Yes, that one.  Sorry, that's why I wanted to you to get over one lane."

Me: "What cross streets is your office at, again?"

Wife: "8th and Congress.  No, don't turn here!!!" (as I make a left on Lavaca).

Me: "Oh, I thought I'd skip that traffic at the Congress light and head up to 7th.  Shouldn't be any line to turn left on Congress up there.  What corner is your office on?"

Wife: "I never go this way."

Me: "What corner is your office on?"

Wife: "Northeast."

Me: "What time is your last call?  Did you want me to try and pick you up before I get the kids, or are you going to Uber home?" 

*At this point I pulled over at the northeast corner of 8th and Congress*

Wife: "It's not over til 4:30, so I'll Uber.  (She looks up from her phone) This isn't my office, it's over there (points at southwest corner of 9th).  Oh well, I can walk I guess."

 

I had a very relaxing drive home listening to a podcast.  I then was able to put 10 gallons of gas into what is normally an 8 gallon fill-up.  Cleared the check engine light, took the car for a test drive, battery looked like it was at about 80% prior to the test drive so should be OK there.  Checked the tires, all were right where I filled the to the other weekend.  Tried resetting the monitoring system, problem light still flashes on key on for 1 min prior to light staying on.  Google it, says it needs further diagnosis by a tech, usually a sensor.

via text:

Me: "Hey, car is fine.  I got it fueled up and home.  Tire pressure was ok.  There is probably a bad sensor, that happens sometimes when tires get rotated or the sensor battery gets old."

Wife: "Told you I need a new car."

Me: "You need a new car because a $3 sensor went bad?"

 

Amazingly I didn't hear any further response.  

Bad directions? One small thing went wrong with a very expensive piece of equipment means we need a brand new one? Sorry, I didn't realize you were the one that gave my wife's twin sister a ride to work this week. Thanks for your help. All of your drinks are on me at the next happy hour.

Unless you're the guy that's been sleeping with my wife! In which case, thanks! I saw her texts about a broken down car, but I'm glad you gave her a ride so I could sleep in.

On 11/20/2021 at 4:41 PM, NAVY said:

Wife was trying to spin this god awful Texas football season.

”At least we’ll get higher draft picks.” 
 

 

 

37670455-FB7F-4BE0-AE3E-01C663ACB96B.gif

A few days ago, I was talking football with my 12 year old son and he jokes "Maybe Texas is just tanking to get Arch Manning"

Wife, in a completely serious voice: "Huh, that might turn out to be worth it then."

My son looks at me with a "tell me mom isn't that clueless" look.

Me: "So, what's for dinner"

 

 

On 11/19/2021 at 2:48 PM, SuperSport said:

So we're sitting on the couch last night, compiling our Christmas gift shopping list for extended family..she becomes noticeably frustrated about something, so I glance over at her laptop and see a bunch of Frozen-related images on a Google search. There are zero young girls in either of our families, so at this point I have no idea what she's actually looking for.

Her: Ugh, what's the name of that record player I bought you? Sven and Olaf Something?

Me: [smirking] Bang & Olufsen.

Her: Don't laugh, I was close!

Me: Yeah, it was a good guess...I'll Let it Go.

Wait - how much are yall spending on extended family gift? Because if you're buying someone a Beogram 4002, I would like to join your extended family.

21 hours ago, nnm said:

I like to read. A lot. After dinner and cleanup, Mrs. NNM would rather watch tv.

Sometimes she’ll sit beside me as I read instead of going into the family room to turn on the tv. That’s nice—a little camaraderie is a good thing. However, when that happens, it’s impossible to read. I’ll get three sentences in, she’ll comment about such-and-such, and of course needs affirmation about her comment. I’ll calmly set my book and reading glasses down, and engage in the conversation she wants. As a good husband does. 

I’ll wait until there’s a nice long pause, then re-open my book and put my glasses back on. I’ll go back over the same 3 sentences to figure out where I was. Then she comments about this-and-that. I’ll calmly set my book and reading glasses down, and engage in the conversation she wants. As a good husband does.

Rinse and repeat. 

BTW, I don’t read much fiction. But “The Power Of The Dog,” by Thomas Savage, is fantastic. A gritty western tale in the vein of Steinbeck or Cormac McCarthy. At least it seems like it is—I get only a few sentences in at a time. 

We have an open layout (Kitchen, dinning, LR). I put ear buds in and now I sit at the kitchen island instead of the living room because of this...

We're hosting Thanksgiving this year so we've been doing a lot of menu planning and whatnot.  It's been a collaborative effort.  My wife wants to get two kinds of rolls - one kind that can be bought at a grocery store and then rolls from Hartz chicken.  She thinks they are the bomb.  They are good, I admit it, but I didn't think they were good enough to warrant a special trip.  I didn't say anything though.  Fast forward to this morning:

Wife: "I decided not to get the Hartz rolls after all."

Ojo:  (laughing) "Okay, good.  It was a dumb idea anyway." (bold move, Cotton, I know)

Wife: "It wasn't dumb, it just wasn't..."

Ojo:  "Smart?" (laughing)

Wife:  (getting pissed) "It wasn't a dumb idea; I just decided against it, okay?"

Ojo: "The rolls themselves were not a dumb idea. Making a special trip for a second type of roll in light of all of the other shit we are doing is what I thought was dumb."

Wife:  "I don't know why this is even a discussion."

Ojo:  "I agree."

Fin.

Now wife will be pissed off at me for two weeks.  I was trying to be funny.

I wish I had a nickel for every half finished thought that comes out this woman’s mouth.

“The problem is that I can’t…”

“Hey are we going to…”

I finally learned to just ignore it.

22 minutes ago, Buzzrock said:

I wish I had a nickel for every half finished thought that comes out this woman’s mouth.

“The problem is that I can’t…”

“Hey are we going to…”

I finally learned to just ignore it.

Same.  Why do they do that?  I think it's a hedge.  If they never commit to a statement they maintain plausible deniability and keep us confused.

15 minutes ago, Ojo Rojo said:

Same.  Why do they do that?  I think it's a hedge.  If they never commit to a statement they maintain plausible deniability and keep us confused.

When that happens I look over and she is looking at her phone.  I just leave the room.  It used to irritate the shit out of me but now I'm just bemused.  It's a way better feel.

We're hosting Thanksgiving this year so we've been doing a lot of menu planning and whatnot.  It's been a collaborative effort.  My wife wants to get two kinds of rolls - one kind that can be bought at a grocery store and then rolls from Hartz chicken.  She thinks they are the bomb.  They are good, I admit it, but I didn't think they were good enough to warrant a special trip.  I didn't say anything though.  Fast forward to this morning:
Wife: "I decided not to get the Hartz rolls after all."
Ojo:  (laughing) "Okay, good.  It was a dumb idea anyway." (bold move, Cotton, I know)
Wife: "It wasn't dumb, it just wasn't..."
Ojo:  "Smart?" (laughing)
Wife:  (getting pissed) "It wasn't a dumb idea; I just decided against it, okay?"
Ojo: "The rolls themselves were not a dumb idea. Making a special trip for a second type of roll in light of all of the other shit we are doing is what I thought was dumb."
Wife:  "I don't know why this is even a discussion."
Ojo:  "I agree."
Fin.
Now wife will be pissed off at me for two weeks.  I was trying to be funny.

Serious rookie move brah
2 hours ago, Ojo Rojo said:

We're hosting Thanksgiving this year so we've been doing a lot of menu planning and whatnot.  It's been a collaborative effort.  My wife wants to get two kinds of rolls - one kind that can be bought at a grocery store and then rolls from Hartz chicken.  She thinks they are the bomb.  They are good, I admit it, but I didn't think they were good enough to warrant a special trip.  I didn't say anything though.  Fast forward to this morning:

Wife: "I decided not to get the Hartz rolls after all."

Ojo:  (laughing) "Okay, good.  It was a dumb idea anyway." (bold move, Cotton, I know)

Wife: "It wasn't dumb, it just wasn't..."

Ojo:  "Smart?" (laughing)

Wife:  (getting pissed) "It wasn't a dumb idea; I just decided against it, okay?"

Ojo: "The rolls themselves were not a dumb idea. Making a special trip for a second type of roll in light of all of the other shit we are doing is what I thought was dumb."

Wife:  "I don't know why this is even a discussion."

Ojo:  "I agree."

Fin.

Now wife will be pissed off at me for two weeks.  I was trying to be funny.

Now you're going to be making a trip to Hartz chicken on Wednesday evening

When that happens I look over and she is looking at her phone.  I just leave the room.  It used to irritate the shit out of me but now I'm just bemused.  It's a way better feel.

Yup. I used to yell, “AND???” which of course would get me in trouble. Now I just don’t care.

And yes, it’s always while she’s looking at her phone. Which is all the time.

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