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Featured Replies

So on the scary high end to make the article work they claim 5% power loss? You know even the non-Surly elite are going to pay a 5% premium to not be incredibly fucking inconvenienced constantly without blinking. 

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  • Buddy sent a text today...said his wife decided to shop vac their fireplace and clean up all the ash. When she finished, she turned around and didn’t realize the shop vac lid wasn’t really seated, so

  • BearCountry11
    BearCountry11

    From earlier this evening...   My father in law lost his cell phone on the golf course this afternoon.  It was raining so we didn’t have much hope it would still be working but he shares the

Posted Images

2 hours ago, Celery Man said:

To be revisited later

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yes yes, shaggypoor garage. I’ll finish it after I replace this wall

Umm.. that seems like some man-level parking skills to me. She does that 10/10 times and you owe her a salad tossing. 

1 hour ago, NorthLoop said:

Umm.. that seems like some man-level parking skills to me. She does that 10/10 times and you owe her a salad tossing

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2 hours ago, ISUCyclones said:


I was wondering who was brave enough for this

A woman.

2 hours ago, rage-a-holic said:

That article admits you need a Kill A Watt or similar device to determine if something is actually a vampire power offender.

$20 on amazon for the wife and spend a romantic evening together checking everything in the house with it.

I use one of these:

https://www.amazon.com/Electricity-Monitor-Voltage-Overload-Protection/dp/B07DPJ3RGB/ref=pd_lpo_3?pd_rd_i=B07DPJ3RGB&psc=1

 

I'm not defending her behavior in the marriage.  I'm simply pointing out that she isn't an idiot and compromises are worth discussing.  Unplug my coffee maker and my entire staff will fuck you up.

11 minutes ago, tigol said:

I'm not defending her behavior in the marriage.  I'm simply pointing out that she isn't an idiot and compromises are worth discussing.  Unplug my coffee maker and my entire staff will fuck you up.

which is why I suggested buying a Kill A Watt type device and checking everything. She is probably right for unplugging few things and wrong about some others.

9 hours ago, Mitch Cumsteen said:

Do you not know the tennis ball trick?

I use a golf ball for mine...has worked  several years for her....I placed it so she could use it as a "line-up" reference to get through the garage door as well

If she could park like that every time I'd be impressed, but that was sheer luck she didn't pull another several inches forward. There's just as likely to be no room for me to scoot behind her (not very long) car to get out to the trash by the side of the garage.  I probably should hang a tennis ball from the ceiling before disaster strikes.

 

On 2/9/2022 at 4:05 PM, Frank The Tank said:

Trash/Recycle day was yesterday. There is literally nothing else in this recycle bin besides this giant box from one of her stupid meal/smoothie delivery services. 5F592BF8-E7FA-4366-A06E-93DC3844C6BC.thumb.jpeg.d25dd9506b889dda09c6a0a38764d03d.jpeg
 

And I just realized that this is the wife equivalent of fucking up the laundry. 

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Edited by NYTransplant

8 hours ago, BearMace said:

1053052dee1d848ed9cf760d37852597fbc19143

Because it’s called a rim job, Rachel. Assume the position and I’ll demonstrate it for you. 

My wife is a masters educated woman. Two undergrad degrees. She’s pretty smart. Like most women, she’s really geographically challenged. So there’s a game on the interwebs called Worldle. It give you an outline of a country and you guess what it is. Then they tell you how far you are away and what direction to go. Yesterday was Nepal. 
 

I somehow got it on the third guess. 
 

After three guesses, she says “Give me a hint”. So, I said “Mount Everest is there”. She says “DENMARK?! Oh wait is Denmark a town or Country?!”

So now she’s looking up flights to the town of Denmark.

9 minutes ago, ocugolf said:

My wife is a masters educated woman. Two undergrad degrees. She’s pretty smart. Like most women, she’s really geographically challenged. So there’s a game on the interwebs called Worldle. It give you an outline of a country and you guess what it is. Then they tell you how far you are away and what direction to go. Yesterday was Nepal. 
 

I somehow got it on the third guess. 
 

After three guesses, she says “Give me a hint”. So, I said “Mount Everest is there”. She says “DENMARK?! Oh wait is Denmark a town or Country?!”

So now she’s looking up flights to the town of Denmark.

Isn't that the town in The Flintstones???

-Mrs. Ocugolf

19 minutes ago, ocugolf said:

So now she’s looking up flights to the town of Denmark.

Hope the plane doesn't fly into Everest. 

The name "Everest" is clearly Danish.

Somewhat related, but wife's side of the family are Danish so that makes my kids 1/64th or whatever. Anyhoo, my daughter's sixth grade female teacher insisted that people from Denmark are Dutch. That sixth grade teacher is someone's wife. 

45 minutes ago, Anwar Namtut said:

The name "Everest" is clearly Danish.

Somewhat related, but wife's side of the family are Danish so that makes my kids 1/64th or whatever. Anyhoo, my daughter's sixth grade female teacher insisted that people from Denmark are Dutch. That sixth grade teacher is someone's wife. 

How about all those Swiss people from Sweden?  That actually happened in our house a couple of times. 

Edited by nnm

1 hour ago, Anwar Namtut said:

The name "Everest" is clearly Danish.

Somewhat related, but wife's side of the family are Danish so that makes my kids 1/64th or whatever. Anyhoo, my daughter's sixth grade female teacher insisted that people from Denmark are Dutch. That sixth grade teacher is someone's wife. 

5c7d34db-5a5b-4ddc-ad57-f542b5f03711_tex

Ordered Texas de Brazil for valentines dinner at home. My wife insisted it be cool medium well. Most of it was well done. Why do women not like medium rare or even medium? Goddamn waste.

The name "Everest" is clearly Danish.
Somewhat related, but wife's side of the family are Danish so that makes my kids 1/64th or whatever. Anyhoo, my daughter's sixth grade female teacher insisted that people from Denmark are Dutch. That sixth grade teacher is someone's wife. 

a00b70d45bf4cbb36c68bc510e43f127.jpg

What's that I smell on the evening breeze?

It's the goddamn Dutch making Limberger cheese,

God made the Irish and they ain't much,

but they're a hell of a lot better that the GD Dutch.

18 minutes ago, Nolacycling said:

What's that I smell on the evening breeze?

It's the goddamn Dutch making Limberger cheese,

God made the Irish and they ain't much,

but they're a hell of a lot better that the GD Dutch.

What’s your quote from?  I work with a lot of Dutchies and could use this. 

20 hours ago, CycleTex87 said:

I ran with the HHH back in the day.

Former brother-in-law tried to get me to run with him/them. Run? Fuck that.

The name "Everest" is clearly Danish.
Somewhat related, but wife's side of the family are Danish so that makes my kids 1/64th or whatever. Anyhoo, my daughter's sixth grade female teacher insisted that people from Denmark are Dutch. That sixth grade teacher is someone's wife. 

dad72603de7b0951ddbaab0f3dfbc717.jpg

A little something to share with your wives. Ah, the good ol' days
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“Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.”

Invite a girlfriend over. Give him a lift when he comes home from a boring day at work. He’ll thank you for it. 

On 2/15/2022 at 1:19 PM, General Specific said:


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As someone who just left a Dutch company for an American competitor, I completely agree.  F the Dutch.  Cheap cunts. 

On 2/23/2022 at 12:21 AM, Sam Lin said:

There’s a Little Shop of Horrors vibe to that setup. I like how they use a Pringles can as a reference for size. I’d like to know more about the glass bottles in the background. 

On 2/10/2022 at 7:42 PM, mulletpelini said:

Well her gypsy mother moved in last week then this happened.

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On 2/11/2022 at 6:23 PM, CycleTex87 said:

What exactly are we looking at here?

Shit, I had the story underneath, I must have deleted it before posting it somehow.  Crazy gypsy MIL was washing dishes and apparently somehow got the phone charger wet? (It's the only thing I can figure out that happened here) and then it shorted and melted its way into the baby formula holder, fuck if I know how that happened, but a woman was involved.

On 2/12/2022 at 6:06 AM, Hpara759 said:

I use a golf ball for mine...has worked  several years for her....I placed it so she could use it as a "line-up" reference to get through the garage door as well

It works great until she closes the car door, catching the ball inside the car, and driving away.  Multiple times.

 

9 hours ago, mulletpelini said:

It works great until she closes the car door, catching the ball inside the car, and driving away.  Multiple times.

 

I am alone in my office and this made me laugh out loud. Thank you. 

10 hours ago, mulletpelini said:

Shit, I had the story underneath, I must have deleted it before posting it somehow.  Crazy gypsy MIL was washing dishes and apparently somehow got the phone charger wet? (It's the only thing I can figure out that happened here) and then it shorted and melted its way into the baby formula holder, fuck if I know how that happened, but a woman was involved.

It works great until she closes the car door, catching the ball inside the car, and driving away.  Multiple times.

 

This right here. The handle is missing from the rope that is attached to my automatic garage door opener for manual release. When the garage door is up the rope hangs (used to) right at the vehicle door space.

1 hour ago, mininghorn88 said:

This right here. The handle is missing from the rope that is attached to my automatic garage door opener for manual release. When the garage door is up the rope hangs (used to) right at the vehicle door space.

Kind of on you for not shortening the pull string with a little knot. That is very early in the steps of new garage or vehicle ownership

1 hour ago, JSB said:

Kind of on you for not shortening the pull string with a little knot. That is very early in the steps of new garage, vehicle, or wife ownership

FIFM

3 hours ago, TrashMaster G said:

You should report him.

My tealight holder rules.

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On 2/11/2022 at 9:02 PM, Mitch Cumsteen said:

Do you not know the tennis ball trick?

That worked for me when I went from a smaller car to a sedan. I thought my husband was a genius. haha

1 hour ago, deadshank said:

Whose wife is this?

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all-of-them-kevin-hart.gif

I think my wife has a little Munchausen going on. Yesterday she was complaining about her knee hurting. We're sitting in bed in the evening, the toddler is bouncing around on the mattress. She's got her leg out right where it's obvious to everyone within a 5 mile radius that the kid is about to jump/roll over her bum knee, which of course he does, and she acts like she got hit by a sniper. Then I get yelled at for rolling my eyes. 

8 hours ago, Nolacycling said:

Why weren't YOU playing with the baby?

Or the wife with the legs splayed out on the bed?

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