March 31, 20223 yr 2 minutes ago, kmac30 said: They told me I needed X% (don’t remember exact number) and the full face and serial number. Out of 7, they said I had full face on 2. Some they declined were missing tiny points of the face. It was silly. That’s dumb. You can only claim 1 bill to the Fed, so if you cut it exactly in half and got one bank to take one and another bank to take another, the first one to turn it into the fed would get credit for it, the bank that sent it in 2nd were SOL. The fed registers the serial when they are processing mutilated currency which is why they need that, but you could have half of the serial number from the left side of the bill and half from the right side of the bill and that would be acceptable. If you cut the bill in thirds and took the face out that should still be enough to claim. The face thing is just dumb but the banks aren’t required to take mutilated currency, they do it as a courtesy so they can set dumb rules.
April 2, 20223 yr Wife sees Stone Cold Steve Austin on TV and asks: "Why isn't his ears messed up like other wrestlers?"
April 2, 20223 yr 29 minutes ago, Doze said: Wife sees Stone Cold Steve Austin on TV and asks: "Why isn't his ears messed up like other wrestlers?" Oh wow that's awesome. For a couple of reasons. Edited April 2, 20223 yr by ztejas
April 3, 20223 yr Driving around Ft Worth. Me: What’s that voice? Wife: That's Christina Aguilarea Me: Why is Christina Aguilera talking to me? Wife: She’s my GPS voice Me:Your GPS is Christina Aguilera? Wife: yes! Me: We’ll no wonder we can’t find Shit this weekend!
April 3, 20223 yr Driving around Ft Worth. Me: What’s that voice? Wife: That's Christina Aguilarea Me: Why is Christina Aguilera talking to me? Wife: She’s my GPS voice Me:Your GPS is Christina Aguilera? Wife: yes! Me: We’ll no wonder we can’t find Shit this weekend!
April 4, 20223 yr 7 hours ago, Elvis said: Driving around Ft Worth. Me: What’s that voice? Wife: That's Christina Aguilarea Me: Why is Christina Aguilera talking to me? Wife: She’s my GPS voice Me:Your GPS is Christina Aguilera? Wife: yes! Me: We’ll no wonder we can’t find Shit this weekend! Why were you looking for Shit?
April 4, 20223 yr 16 minutes ago, TrashMaster G said: Why were you looking for Shit? It’s springtime and he’s planting a garden.
April 4, 20223 yr On 3/30/2022 at 8:54 AM, ABSR said: If she talks to me as she is walking away, in another room, or does something so she or I can't hear each other during a conversation I just stop talking and assume it doesn't matter. Risky strategy, Sir.
April 4, 20223 yr On 3/23/2022 at 6:36 AM, nnm said: Smoke detectors are assholes. They never start beeping for more batteries at 10:00 am on a Saturday when you have all day to deal with it. Nope, it’s always 2:00 am on a Tuesday when you have a huge meeting first thing in the morning. Or when you’re out of town and your wife can’t get to the device. Or when you've let the dog in the house because it's going to rain and you get home 4 hours later to a ringing smoke detector and 4-5 destroyed pillows.
April 4, 20223 yr 3 minutes ago, Elvis said: Smoke detector talk not going away. Irritating smoke detector beeping not going away.
April 6, 20223 yr Popular Post We went to Seattle last weekend, so I have two: 1. Went to the hockey game Friday night, and it was "clear plastic bag giveaway night." You know, the bags that every sporting event now requires you to carry instead of a purse? We walked out with about 5 of them. So anyways, we go to a college baseball game Sunday. As we walk up, I notice that she's carrying her purse. "You forgot to bring one of the 5 clear plastic bags we now have, didn't you?" So I got to go in before her, and buy a clear plastic bag for $15 from the souvenir stand. 2. We took the redeye flight back and landed at about 4:30am. I walked out to get the car while she waited for baggage. (We parked in the economy lot because we'd much rather spend our money on clear plastic bags.) Once in the car, I couldn't find the parking receipt. So I called her and found out the ticket was in her purse. So I walked back to the terminal to get it. "Why did you not leave it in the car?" "I've heard you're not supposed to do that." "Why?!?!?!?" "Well, someone could break into the car and steal it." "Why would someone break into a car to steal a parking receipt? And wouldn't it be much more likely that they'd steal your purse and the ticket inside it?" "Why are you always so critical of me?"
April 7, 20223 yr Not defending at all, but here in Asia, parking ticket/receipt/entry cards are never left in the car. It is a precaution against someone stealing your car. If someone breaks into your car in the parking lot and drives it off, when they try to exit the parking facility with no ticket, the facility generally will at least check ownership of the car or make you demonstrate some form of connection to it. It's one more hurdle to someone stealing your car.
April 7, 20223 yr 11 hours ago, Sam Lin said: Not defending at all, but here in Asia, parking ticket/receipt/entry cards are never left in the car. It is a precaution against someone stealing your car. If someone breaks into your car in the parking lot and drives it off, when they try to exit the parking facility with no ticket, the facility generally will at least check ownership of the car or make you demonstrate some form of connection to it. It's one more hurdle to someone stealing your car. Yeah, you keep it in your wallet. And you always have a pen on hand so you can mark it with where you parked. I thought that was S.O.P. I’ll add that I still occasionally have dreams where I don’t remember where I parked my car and I can’t figure out if I’m just lost or it’s been stolen. Always glad to wake up from those. Edited April 7, 20223 yr by WhatTheBuck
April 7, 20223 yr 3 hours ago, WhatTheBuck said: And you always have a pen on hand Pops always wanted only shirts with a front pocket. That's where glasses and pen went.
April 7, 20223 yr 4 hours ago, WhatTheBuck said: Yeah, you keep it in your wallet. And you always have a pen on hand so you can mark it with where you parked. I thought that was S.O.P. I’ll add that I still occasionally have dreams where I don’t remember where I parked my car and I can’t figure out if I’m just lost or it’s been stolen. Always glad to wake up from those. Why in the hell do you need a parking receipt? Are you guys not using your private airstrip and private plane? Rookies
April 7, 20223 yr 41 minutes ago, jeevsie said: Pops always wanted only shirts with a front pocket. That's where glasses and pen went. Son?
April 9, 20223 yr On 4/7/2022 at 2:42 PM, jeevsie said: Pops always wanted only shirts with a front pocket. That's where glasses and pen went. For my Dad, it's his smokes. Old motherfucker is pushing 90, and he's still burning two packs a day. Always in the front pocket.
April 11, 20223 yr On 4/10/2022 at 6:15 AM, Longhornstampede said: As opposed to storing shit in a back pocket of your shirt? As opposed to buying shirts with no pockets, POINDEXTER
April 12, 20223 yr On 3/15/2022 at 2:07 PM, deadshank said: The black ended up in her after divorcing you. Lmfao
April 15, 20223 yr On 4/1/2022 at 7:50 PM, Doze said: Wife sees Stone Cold Steve Austin on TV and asks: "Why isn't his ears messed up like other wrestlers?" Pos rep to your wife for knowing real wrestling and cauliflower ears!
April 15, 20223 yr Background problem: kids are getting to school lateWife solution: you need to do more in the mornings, the kids don’t listen to me, and I am running late. Man solution: please do not turn on the TV in the morning. It distracts the kids. When we didn’t turn on the tv in them morning the kids were on time. Wife: but I need my coffee and a moment to wake up, I’ll just turn it off when I am done. Man: we agree to a trial of my way and her way.Week one results: no tv, kids are ready early, kids are happier, adults are happier. We are so early that I brush out hair and basically do it all by myself. Is there a need for week 2? Will she admit I was correct for a 5th time in 20 years?
April 15, 20223 yr 40 minutes ago, Nivek said: Background problem: kids are getting to school late Wife solution: you need to do more in the mornings, the kids don’t listen to me, and I am running late. Man solution: please do not turn on the TV in the morning. It distracts the kids. When we didn’t turn on the tv in them morning the kids were on time. Wife: but I need my coffee and a moment to wake up, I’ll just turn it off when I am done. Man: we agree to a trial of my way and her way. Week one results: no tv, kids are ready early, kids are happier, adults are happier. We are so early that I brush out hair and basically do it all by myself. Is there a need for week 2? Will she admit I was correct for a 5th time in 20 years? Narrator: He wasn’t right. Never was, never will be.
April 15, 20223 yr 58 minutes ago, Nivek said: Background problem: kids are getting to school late Wife solution: you need to do more in the mornings, the kids don’t listen to me, and I am running late. Man solution: please do not turn on the TV in the morning. It distracts the kids. When we didn’t turn on the tv in them morning the kids were on time. Wife: but I need my coffee and a moment to wake up, I’ll just turn it off when I am done. Man: we agree to a trial of my way and her way. Week one results: no tv, kids are ready early, kids are happier, adults are happier. We are so early that I brush out hair and basically do it all by myself. Is there a need for week 2? Will she admit I was correct for a 5th time in 20 years? Wife has been in Italy with my mom and some friends for a couple weeks. It’s amazing how we are now always 5 minutes early to everywhere.
April 15, 20223 yr 1 hour ago, Nivek said: Will she admit I was correct for a 5th time in 20 years? But who's counting?
April 15, 20223 yr 1 minute ago, Mo Horn said: But who's counting? They both are. But do you think the counts match?
April 15, 20223 yr 1 hour ago, Nivek said: Background problem: kids are getting to school late Wife solution: you need to do more in the mornings, the kids don’t listen to me, and I am running late. Man solution: please do not turn on the TV in the morning. It distracts the kids. When we didn’t turn on the tv in them morning the kids were on time. Wife: but I need my coffee and a moment to wake up, I’ll just turn it off when I am done. Man: we agree to a trial of my way and her way. Week one results: no tv, kids are ready early, kids are happier, adults are happier. We are so early that I brush out hair and basically do it all by myself. Is there a need for week 2? Will she admit I was correct for a 5th time in 20 years? Narrator: There was a week 2. It was a disaster. And it was his fault.
April 15, 20223 yr On 3/23/2022 at 6:36 AM, nnm said: Smoke detectors are assholes. They never start beeping for more batteries at 10:00 am on a Saturday when you have all day to deal with it. Nope, it’s always 2:00 am on a Tuesday when you have a huge meeting first thing in the morning. Or when you’re out of town and your wife can’t get to the device. I hit the smoke detector powerball this year. One started beeping at 5:30 pm on a weekday and another started beeping at 9:00 Saturday morning last week. Prior to that it was always 3:00 AM.
April 15, 20223 yr 3 hours ago, Nivek said: Background problem: kids are getting to school late Wife solution: you need to do more in the mornings, the kids don’t listen to me, and I am running late. Man solution: please do not turn on the TV in the morning. It distracts the kids. When we didn’t turn on the tv in them morning the kids were on time. Wife: but I need my coffee and a moment to wake up, I’ll just turn it off when I am done. Man: we agree to a trial of my way and her way. Week one results: no tv, kids are ready early, kids are happier, adults are happier. We are so early that I brush out hair and basically do it all by myself. Is there a need for week 2? Will she admit I was correct for a 5th time in 20 years? I swear you are me 5 years ago
April 16, 20223 yr 4 hours ago, TrashMaster G said: Narrator: There was a week 2. It was a disaster. And it was his fault. And that will be our routine from now on.
April 16, 20223 yr Watching baseball tonight... "Why are the Cardinals wearing blue numbers?" "Are you kidding? You are NOT serious..." She grabs her phone and I see her googling something about "Cardinals uniforms" "OH! It's Jackie Robinson Day! <loooooooooong pause> but why are they honoring him by wearing blue numbers?" "There's no way you're serious..." <a couple of silent minutes pass> "Oh, they're all wearing number 42!" I swear this actually happened.
April 16, 20223 yr 15 minutes ago, Beau Vine said: Watching baseball tonight... "Why are the Cardinals wearing blue numbers?" "Are you kidding? You are NOT serious..." She grabs her phone and I see her googling something about "Cardinals uniforms" "OH! It's Jackie Robinson Day! <loooooooooong pause> but why are they honoring him by wearing blue numbers?" "There's no way you're serious..." <a couple of silent minutes pass> "Oh, they're all wearing number 42!" I swear this actually happened. You are somehow surprised that a women is confused by the Cardinals wearing blue numbers, not knowing it’s Jackie Robinson Day and not realizing they are all wearing the same number?? What is she supposed to be a huge baseball fan? I had a girl ask me once how many points they got in baseball when they scored…. Edited April 16, 20223 yr by Hook1997
April 16, 20223 yr Popular Post Will she admit I was correct for a 5th time in 20 years? I’ll tell on myself. My husband and I have a twenty year ongoing fight about how early to arrive at the airport for a domestic flight. I’ve mostly given up to keep peace. (He wants to be there two hours before boarding; I want to be there one hour before boarding. The “right” answer I think is probably in the middle.)Last week I flew to SLC by myself and was insanely late—only made it on the plane due to renewing Clear while in line and a 20 minute flight delay. I ran to the gate and onto the jetway,and they closed the doors behind me like a movie. Once my heart stopped pounding I texted him that I made it on the plane, and that, while his way isn’t my favorite way, it’s much, much better than mine. He was so happy he said he was going to print out the text and frame it.
April 16, 20223 yr 5 minutes ago, harpercollins said: (He wants to be there two hours before boarding; I want to be there one hour before boarding. The “right” answer I think is probably in the middle.) Assuming you don't live in Austin.
April 16, 20223 yr 1 hour ago, harpercollins said: I’ll tell on myself. My husband and I have a twenty year ongoing fight about how early to arrive at the airport for a domestic flight. I’ve mostly given up to keep peace. (He wants to be there two hours before boarding; I want to be there one hour before boarding. The “right” answer I think is probably in the middle.) Last week I flew to SLC by myself and was insanely late—only made it on the plane due to renewing Clear while in line and a 20 minute flight delay. I ran to the gate and onto the jetway, and they closed the doors behind me like a movie. Once my heart stopped pounding I texted him that I made it on the plane, and that, while his way isn’t my favorite way, it’s much, much better than mine. He was so happy he said he was going to print out the text and frame it. I agree with you. One hour before the flight should be plenty unless it’s a busy airport at peak times.
April 16, 20223 yr Watching baseball tonight... "Why are the Cardinals wearing blue numbers?" "Are you kidding? You are NOT serious..." She grabs her phone and I see her googling something about "Cardinals uniforms" "OH! It's Jackie Robinson Day! but why are they honoring him by wearing blue numbers?" "There's no way you're serious..." "Oh, they're all wearing number 42!" I swear this actually happened.In her defense this was the first year they all wore blue numbers.
April 16, 20223 yr 8 hours ago, harpercollins said: I’ll tell on myself. My husband and I have a twenty year ongoing fight about how early to arrive at the airport for a domestic flight. I’ve mostly given up to keep peace. (He wants to be there two hours before boarding; I want to be there one hour before boarding. The “right” answer I think is probably in the middle.) Last week I flew to SLC by myself and was insanely late—only made it on the plane due to renewing Clear while in line and a 20 minute flight delay. I ran to the gate and onto the jetway, and they closed the doors behind me like a movie. Once my heart stopped pounding I texted him that I made it on the plane, and that, while his way isn’t my favorite way, it’s much, much better than mine. He was so happy he said he was going to print out the text and frame it. This reads exactly like when aggy posts on here claiming to not be aggy but you can still tell it's aggy. "Given up to keep peace..." yeah nice try....
April 16, 20223 yr This reads exactly like when aggy posts on here claiming to not be aggy but you can still tell it's aggy. "Given up to keep peace..." yeah nice try....Lol! This got me
April 16, 20223 yr 9 hours ago, nnm said: I agree with you. One hour before the flight should be plenty unless it’s a busy airport at peak times. What are you going to spend that hour doing that's worth the stress of worrying about getting through security and shit on time? I fucking hate traveling but when we do we are at the airport a minimum of two hours early. And b/c we're often at SeaTac flying east that means 5AM a lot of times. Fuck it, I've got coffee and lots of books I want to read. Totally worth it to be there early and wait.
April 16, 20223 yr 7 hours ago, Llogg said: What are you going to spend that hour doing that's worth the stress of worrying about getting through security and shit on time? I fucking hate traveling but when we do we are at the airport a minimum of two hours early. And b/c we're often at SeaTac flying east that means 5AM a lot of times. Fuck it, I've got coffee and lots of books I want to read. Totally worth it to be there early and wait. Ditto. I get it if I was at some regional airport like in Laramie, WY or even in Bismarck, ND but in Houston the protocol is 2 hours.
April 16, 20223 yr I’ll tell on myself. My husband and I have a twenty year ongoing fight about how early to arrive at the airport for a domestic flight. I’ve mostly given up to keep peace. (He wants to be there two hours before boarding; I want to be there one hour before boarding. The “right” answer I think is probably in the middle.)Last week I flew to SLC by myself and was insanely late—only made it on the plane due to renewing Clear while in line and a 20 minute flight delay. I ran to the gate and onto the jetway,and they closed the doors behind me like a movie. Once my heart stopped pounding I texted him that I made it on the plane, and that, while his way isn’t my favorite way, it’s much, much better than mine. He was so happy he said he was going to print out the text and frame it. I’m guessing that you wrecked the car on the way to the airport.
April 16, 20223 yr Typical situation you all are familiar with. We need to be somewhere today at noon. On the way, we need to pick up something from the bakery that is 10 minutes away. I tell my wife we need to leave by 10:30, which gives me that half hour buffer we all need to EVEN GET CLOSE to leaving on time. I hit the bakery at 8am to get the item, now let her know we need to leave by 10:45 to be there on time. We pull out of the driveway at 11:28. The end.
April 16, 20223 yr All you can do is just go sit in the car in the driveway at 10:45, surf the shag on your phone, and enjoy the zen until she decides to roll out.
April 17, 20223 yr 43 minutes ago, tbone_ said: All you can do is just go sit in the car in the driveway at 10:45, surf the shag on your phone, and enjoy the zen until she decides to roll out. or take the AB road and tell her you are leaving at 1045 with or without her.... and follow up on the threat and leave at 1046. you will get screamed at for a long time and either sleeping on the couch or by yourself and not get any sexy time for a month or 2....
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