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Tex Long is 75.

Never thought I'd make it, leastways not for my first 65 years. Now I reckon I'll just keep going... Which is a Good Thing, because that might be what it takes to make sure I see the 'Horns win all our games some fine season.

 

Happy birfday, my man.  It's just a number.  Or so I tell myself, anyway.

  • Author

Wait... that's black lab, which means Kev'Mo is a girl???

You and my Dad are the same age.  He would never post on a message board and can't read email without shouting at Mom, "How do you turn this damn thing on?"

 

Hook em

Edited by PhillyD

Happy Birthday Tex! I hope your wife gives you a bj.

Congratulations on the first 75!

Happy Birthday!  So tell me . . . what did you think would "get you" before this?  I tend to believe I won't make it to your age (2 decades to go), but I talk to a lot of folks who say "yeah, I thought that too, but here I am".

Happy birthday. It’s good to see old men like yourself mixing it up on the interwebs. 

Real man would have had his birthday yesterday.   Happy birthday.  

  • Author
36 minutes ago, jimmyjazz said:

Happy Birthday!  So tell me . . . what did you think would "get you" before this?  I tend to believe I won't make it to your age (2 decades to go), but I talk to a lot of folks who say "yeah, I thought that too, but here I am".

Well, both my grandfathers croaked youngish - one late 50s, one early 60s. My mom's younger brother didn't wake up one Sunday morning when he was 54. I figgered those were probably pretty good signs, but I was wrong.

On 4/4/2018 at 9:20 AM, Stros said:

Happy Birthday Tex! I hope your wife gives you a bj.

happy birthday! reminder her to take her teeth out first.

Jesus man...I'm sorry.

 

 

 

Nah, it seems that you are still got most of your mental faculties,. You are truly blessed with wisdom and hopefully peace.

  • Author

Apparently my warranty expired. Woke up the other morning with my left testicle swollen, sore and hot, three or four times the size of the right one. Family doc took off for a few days, so I thought I'd hang (unintended pun) 'til Monday. Took course of Cipro that was left over from the better half's last bout of whatever it was, spending most of my time horizontal. Sharp end of pain way down, dull end rising. I know, shoulda gone to ER, but... Alpine. For-profit hospital, area too small to support surgeons and specialists, so their treatment of real problems tends to be to putz around for a few hours and then order up a $1000 ambulance ride (or a $40,000 chopper ride) to the nearest real hospital, in Odessa... so I figgered the better part of valor, for what appears to be a hernia and not some raging infection, was to wait for Monday and let the family quack check it out and then schedule surgery or whatever in Odessa.

I am sort of a Reverse Rumpole - like him, my life is blessed with the presence of She-who-must-be-obeyed, but in my case, it is She who is the Lawyer.

She has been fretting about this matter all week, and this morning she spoke with a couple of friends in the medical community, who told her that the GP would absolutely tell us to head for Odessa ER right now. There they will actually figure out what's up and get the ball rolling - dammit, another unintentional pun.

So... when She gets done preparing for a two-hour drive, we'll be heading for the Permian Basin. I'll let y'all know whether I'm in need of prayer or derision. I'm pretty sure I know which, but we'll let it play out.

Apparently my warranty expired. Woke up the other morning with my left testicle swollen, sore and hot, three or four times the size of the right one. Family doc took off for a few days, so I thought I'd hang (unintended pun) 'til Monday. Took course of Cipro that was left over from the better half's last bout of whatever it was, spending most of my time horizontal. Sharp end of pain way down, dull end rising. I know, shoulda gone to ER, but... Alpine. For-profit hospital, area too small to support surgeons and specialists, so their treatment of real problems tends to be to putz around for a few hours and then order up a $1000 ambulance ride (or a $40,000 chopper ride) to the nearest real hospital, in Odessa... so I figgered the better part of valor, for what appears to be a hernia and not some raging infection, was to wait for Monday and let the family quack check it out and then schedule surgery or whatever in Odessa.
I am sort of a Reverse Rumpole - like him, my life is blessed with the presence of She-who-must-be-obeyed, but in my case, it is She who is the Lawyer.
She has been fretting about this matter all week, and this morning she spoke with a couple of friends in the medical community, who told her that the GP would absolutely tell us to head for Odessa ER right now. There they will actually figure out what's up and get the ball rolling - dammit, another unintentional pun.
So... when She gets done preparing for a two-hour drive, we'll be heading for the Permian Basin. I'll let y'all know whether I'm in need of prayer or derision. I'm pretty sure I know which, but we'll let it play out.

Sounds like a fun trip...hope you have a ball!

Nut up and go get yourself checked out.

  • Author

Derision. 

Quack in Odessa says epididymitis. No hernia. Got a scrip for some hellacious antibiotic, ten days' worth. Gotta stay mostly horizontal for four or five days, until swelling goes down. I can hardly wait.

Apparently it spreads by sexual contact. I guess the Cialis worked for birthday sex.

3 hours ago, Tex Long said:

Derision. 

Quack in Odessa says epididymitis. No hernia. Got a scrip for some hellacious antibiotic, ten days' worth. Gotta stay mostly horizontal for four or five days, until swelling goes down. I can hardly wait.

I have had that twice in my life unfortunately. Thank God it has been forever ago though. The first time it happened the doctor said it was a result of a weakness in my testes due to a testicular injury, well two testicular injuries earlier in my life. Said it made me more prone to that problem. Now whether that's true or not I don't know, but I don't envy you sir that is pure hell going through that.

I was talking to a 76 year old Australian this morning who said he is probably one of the few men his age who has sex with two girls together at least once a week.

It is good to have goals in life.

 

On 4/4/2018 at 10:07 AM, Nivek said:

Real man would have had his birthday yesterday. 

I think you meant friday.

Happy belated birthday.  Sounds like you had a ball.... 

i hope you have a speedy recovery. 

Happy belated, you old fuck!  

 

 

HAPPY BELATED, YOU OLD FUCK!

sigh.  He can’t here me. 😔

Daaaaaaamn, you're old as fuck. 

Kidding. Happy Birthday. Hope you got some muscle relaxers...you know, for fun

  • Author

There once was a man of Devrizes

Whose testes were quite different sizes.

One ball was small,

Nearly no ball at all...

But the other was huge, and won prizes.

Happy Belated Birthday and  get well soon!

Damn, you’re older than my brother. I wasn’t sure that was possible.

Belated Happy Birthday!

I'm going to go yell at a cloud in Tex's honor. Then shake my fist in futile anger at the young rapscallions who keep walking on my lawn. And if I'm really feeling it, I'll stare myopically through my spectacles at my computer screen while muttering about new-fangled gadgets.

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