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Texas Recruiting Notes 2023: Strippers, Monkeys, and 5-Stars

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14 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

It saddens me that so many of you are apparently virgins to Jim Gaffigan’s Hot Pockets comedy and its offshoots.

 

 

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    I know it feels like cool shit is happening, but Surly needs to gear all the fucking way up. Big big things coming. Let’s.Fucking.Go!

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Were it not for his elite trash talking ability, Larry Bird would have had about as much cultural relevance as Tom Havlicek. If they’re good at it, I love it. 

28 minutes ago, UDontKnow said:

 

Evan Stewart is being paid so well and is eating <checks video transcript> Hot Pockets.

 

Pin on meme meme.

Is that made from Minecraft lava? Interesting.

1 minute ago, Ricky&#x27;s one-hitter said:

Were it not for his elite trash talking ability, Larry Bird would have had about as much cultural relevance as Tom Havlicek. If they’re good at it, I love it. 

Good point, Tom Havlicek has zero cultural relevance.  

22 hours ago, Rimbo said:

I saw what kind of scheme we were running last year, and it actually made sense. The team just couldn't (or wouldn't) execute it.

Did you now? Maybe you should re-watch the Kansas game again. A defense starting eight seniors/grand transfers at every level was ripped apart by the worst P5 offense in the country because PK refused to walk up his CBs or put any actual pressure on Kansas' third-string QB, and spent all the time trying to passively funnel the run to two of the worst starting LBs in the Big 12. It was a miserable failure of scheme and game planning against a team with no offensive talent outside of a true freshman RB. Okie Lite shut out KU by doing everything PK didn't - pressing the WRs, sending blitzes, and forcing KU's QB to make downfield throws under pressure to WRs who weren't athletic enough to get separation quickly enough. All of that tape was available to PK in the week before the game, and he responded with an awful game plan that allowed KU's third-string QB to play pitch-and-catch with WRs running free on underneath routes facing zero pressure.

26 minutes ago, Duane Moore said:

Good point, Tom Havlicek has zero cultural relevance.  

What's a Tom Havlicek?

They’ve been saying that for OU for the last 2 weeks and not shit has happened 

1 minute ago, SarksJuggs said:

They’ve been saying that for OU for the last 2 weeks and not shit has happened 

The Big Lebowski What GIF by MOODMAN

9 minutes ago, Ricky's one-hitter said:

 

What could this possibly be?!?

Some guesses...

Dick bags are half off at Walmart today?

The ADA lifted it's recommendation for adults to have more than 11 teeth?

Somebody finally able to choke down the last piece of Lincoln Riley's brisket?

5 minutes ago, SarksJuggs said:

They’ve been saying that for OU for the last 2 weeks and not shit has happened 

eric cartman pooping GIF by South Park

1 hour ago, Hiphopopotamos said:

IT says 4* East St. Louis OT Miles McVay (6'6" 360) is going to take an UOV to Texas last weekend of July.

https://247sports.com/player/miles-mcvay-46080187/

His 247 page has a commitment date listed for August 11th.

Also, should see good stuff in the aggy screenshot thread seeing as they think they're getting him.

 

The Huddle: Wednesday intel

Hudson Standish

 

Spoiler

 

The Huddle: Wednesday intel

Hudson Standish
 

— Langham Creek 2023 elite WR Jaquaize Pettaway should announce his college decision today. The sub 21 200m sprinter has been trending Oklahoma and even though the Horns put up a good effort recently, our sources don’t think it will be enough.

— Multiple sources have mentioned that the Texas staff is being aggressive with trying to get Temple ATH Mikal Harrison-Pilot off of his December timeline. The overall message seems to be that Texas will have a spot for you no matter the timeline, but what is the point in waiting since you’re a heavy Texas lean that has been pretty open to the public about where your recruitment stands.

— Austin Westlake 2023 WR Jaden Greathouse publicly announced yesterday that his decision date will be July 15th. This didn’t come as much of a shock to us and we still maintain our previous four weeks worth of reporting that Greathouse is all Irish.

— I mentioned in a recruiting chat that Oregon’s conference instability could help Texas get a much needed boost to surpass the Ducks in the recruitment of 2023 Austin Westlake EDGE Colton Vasek. Another source hit me up yesterday hearing similar things about the conference instability and limited options negatively impacting Oregon.

I’m still not sure that it’ll be enough to move the Horns ahead of the Ducks for a preseason commitment timeline, but the original comment I made during Vasek’s OV to Texas about how a source felt this timeline could play out similarly to Kelvin Banks (Summer Oregon commitment -> NSD Texas flip) seems to be more and more prescient by the day.

— A Top247 recruit from the state of Texas that is committed to another school told Horns247 that they feel like Arlington Martin 2023 CB Javien Toviano will eventually end up at Texas. We’re still talking to sources to get a fully formed updated view of Toviano’s recruitment, but everything we’ve recently heard is encouraging for those wearing burnt orange.

 

 

Edited by Getafix
Got a call from Tom Havlicek

Joe Cook: Steve Sarkisian hints at recruiting pitch offered to 2023 recruits, portal prospects

Quote

Texas head coach Steve Sarkisian would love to talk about Five-Star Plus+ quarterback and Longhorn commit Arch Manning, as well as the host of prospects who followed the New Orleans (La.) Isidore Newman signal-caller recently in joining UT’s 2022 recruiting class. NCAA rules restrict coaches from doing so, but both coaches and media alike have figured out how to speak in generalities in order to touch on a subject without naming specific prospects.

Both Sarkisian and Greg McElroy, a former Alabama quarterback and host of Always College Football, fall into that category. During the show’s debut episode, McElroy asked Sarkisian what the message to all the recruits who joined the fold after the 5-7 2021 season has been.

“I think there’s a lot that goes into it from a recruiting standpoint, but at the end of the day great players want to play with other great players in a program where they feel like they’re going to be developed not only on the football field but off the football field,” Sarkisian said. “We’ve got an amazing product at the University of Texas. When you start talking about a world class education in the city of Austin, which is the fastest growing city in the United states and unbelievable economy, to go along with a blueblood program, right? The history and tradition here at the University of Texas is tremendous, and now getting to really know the recruits on a personal level, the fact that they’re going to come in and compete at their own position group with quality players, that every day in practice the guy lined up across from him is a quality player that’s going to push him to get better.”

McElroy’s question also gave mention to the transfer portal, where Sarkisian found seven players who are vying for playing time in the 2022 season. The highest profile of these transfers was Quinn Ewers, a former Five-Star Plus+ himself. He joins a room with multi-game starter Hudson Card and true freshman Maalik Murphy, where a competition will determine who is under center come week one versus Louisiana-Monroe.

Manning will join that quarterback room in 2023, only creating more competition with other highly-touted prospects. According to Sarkisian, players who truly want to be the best welcome the type of challenge provided by a loaded position room, whether that be at quarterback room or any other spot.

“Getting yourself surrounded by like-minded individuals like yourself when you’re driven, when you’re focused, when you want to be the best, that inspires us to be even better,” Sarkisian said. “I think that the guys we’ve recruited, whether it’s been in the portal or out of the high school ranks, recognize that and they’re not afraid of the competition because that ultimately is what drives those types of individuals to be the best.”

 

On 7/5/2022 at 11:59 AM, 6th Street said:

Christian Jones is unplayable and could get Ewers killed. If Banks, Williams, and Campbell have to learn on the fly, then so be it.

obligatory

2GsYAv.gif

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2 minutes ago, satyanash said:

obligatory

2GsYAv.gif

Football Fan GIF by Sadie

7 minutes ago, satyanash said:

obligatory

2GsYAv.gif

To be fair that same guy abused Kenyon Green and whoever else they put at LT when they played aggy.

1 hour ago, Duane Moore said:

Good point, Tom Havlicek has zero cultural relevance.      doesn't exist.

FIFY

Any ideas/guesses on who said this?

— A Top247 recruit from the state of Texas that is committed to another school told Horns247 that they feel like Arlington Martin 2023 CB Javien Toviano will eventually end up at Texas. We’re still talking to sources to get a fully formed updated view of Toviano’s recruitment, but everything we’ve recently heard is encouraging for those wearing burnt orange.

 

4 minutes ago, Elmer_Fudd said:

Any ideas/guesses on who said this?

— A Top247 recruit from the state of Texas that is committed to another school told Horns247 that they feel like Arlington Martin 2023 CB Javien Toviano will eventually end up at Texas. We’re still talking to sources to get a fully formed updated view of Toviano’s recruitment, but everything we’ve recently heard is encouraging for those wearing burnt orange.

 

I’d bet Micah Bell. 

13 minutes ago, Mr. Mojo Risin&#x27; said:

Okafor is the only reason that's not an 8 yard loss...

Okafor was the only reason the qb wasn’t dead.

8 minutes ago, Elmer_Fudd said:

Any ideas/guesses on who said this?

— A Top247 recruit from the state of Texas that is committed to another school told Horns247 that they feel like Arlington Martin 2023 CB Javien Toviano will eventually end up at Texas. We’re still talking to sources to get a fully formed updated view of Toviano’s recruitment, but everything we’ve recently heard is encouraging for those wearing burnt orange.

 

I’m assuming Peyton Bowen, the Notre Dame commit who was on the Jerrod Heard podcast the other day with Toviano and Burrell. 

22 minutes ago, The Beast said:

Okafor was the only reason the qb wasn’t dead.

Who picked Shit I Never Thought I’d Hear for $800?

5 minutes ago, IDIOTsavant said:

Who picked Shit I Never Thought I’d Hear for $800?

But did you hear it though?  Do you read posts out loud? Do you have them read to you?

Edited by Pato del Muerto

Did you now? Maybe you should re-watch the Kansas game again. A defense starting eight seniors/grand transfers at every level was ripped apart by the worst P5 offense in the country because PK refused to walk up his CBs or put any actual pressure on Kansas' third-string QB, and spent all the time trying to passively funnel the run to two of the worst starting LBs in the Big 12. It was a miserable failure of scheme and game planning against a team with no offensive talent outside of a true freshman RB. Okie Lite shut out KU by doing everything PK didn't - pressing the WRs, sending blitzes, and forcing KU's QB to make downfield throws under pressure to WRs who weren't athletic enough to get separation quickly enough. All of that tape was available to PK in the week before the game, and he responded with an awful game plan that allowed KU's third-string QB to play pitch-and-catch with WRs running free on underneath routes facing zero pressure.

Wrong forum. You are ruining it for recruits.
27 minutes ago, Pato del Muerto said:

But did you hear it though?  Do you read posts out loud? Do you have them read to you?

When I have to do a double take, I do occasionally read it aloud to make sure I’m not missing some juvenile joke. This is Surly after all.

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Come on guys. This isn't Shaggy. Refrain from posting disgusting shit.

3 hours ago, Burntcowboy said:

Here’s the whole video 

 

I love Johntay #nohomo

image.thumb.png.5816b12d1a3289b329455948b19ea7bb.png

1 hour ago, Elmer_Fudd said:

To be fair that same guy abused Kenyon Green and whoever else they put at LT when they played aggy.

What a great read and pickup by Okafor, followed by our QB shitting his pants and leaving a nice pocket.

3 minutes ago, OU Sucks said:

I love Johntay #nohomo

I love Jonhtay too #alwaysthoughtnohomo #butnowI'mnotentirelysure #damnyouJohntay

3 minutes ago, OU Sucks said:

I love Johntay #nohomo

image.thumb.png.5816b12d1a3289b329455948b19ea7bb.png

Gotta admit Stewart looks like he will be a good blocker for Jimbo with those shoulders 

16 minutes ago, jinx said:

Gotta admit Stewart looks like he will be a good blocker for Jimbo with those shoulders 

Forearms seem a little small

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I had to go to like 4 different shady sites to create this, and probably have 8 trojans on my computer now, but:

johntay.gif.466e5091ca25f0c7f61140c2964cdfda.gif

8 minutes ago, OU Sucks said:

I had to go to like 4 different shady sites to create this, and probably have 8 trojans on my computer now, but:

johntay.gif.466e5091ca25f0c7f61140c2964cdfda.gif

I watched that whole video and Stewart is a little bitch. Each time he lost the race it was because Cook cheated somehow 

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1 minute ago, JesusSweatDuck said:

I watched that whole video and Stewart is a little bitch. Each time he lost the race it was because Cook cheated somehow 

Like a true aggy

24 minutes ago, Jebus said:

Forearms seem a little small

I few elephant walks and jizz jar fill ups should take care of that...

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