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Texas Recruiting Notes 2023: Strippers, Monkeys, and 5-Stars

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Can we please get off the religious talk and all unite around jokes about Scientologists? 

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    I know it feels like cool shit is happening, but Surly needs to gear all the fucking way up. Big big things coming. Let’s.Fucking.Go!

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2 hours ago, BurntOrange&White said:

 

BE65B339-0C85-4087-9F37-F522A687AB69.jpeg

I rate her at least a 3

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The Muslim jokes are offensive. If we ever get a Jewish commit would everyone make terrible jokes? Now that I think about it, he’d have to be a pass rusher because you know he’d do everything he could to get the quarterback. 

37 minutes ago, TrashMaster G said:

Username suggests you are drunk.

I just finished my first beer of the day. I'll be there after about four or five more. 

Just now, irishtexan said:

I just finished my first beer of the day. I'll be there after about four or five more. 

Sooooo now?

I rate her at least a 3

Hmm idk I like that kind of thickness.
5 minutes ago, Hank Scorpio said:

The Muslim jokes are offensive. If we ever get a Jewish commit would everyone make terrible jokes? Now that I think about it, he’d have to be a pass rusher because you know he’d do everything he could to get the quarterback. 

Cracking Up Lol GIF by HULU

3 minutes ago, NOOBSDUDE said:


Hmm idk I like that kind of thickness.

that's how many men it would take to pull me off her

1 minute ago, Rimbo said:

that's how many men it would take to pull me off her

Sure you aren’t looking for the Baylor site?

1 minute ago, GreenspointTexas said:

Anyone else concerned a tad about Marions recruting chops/development?

Cook, niblett, bringing Whittington back another year, and potentially adding DeAndre Moore isn't good enough? 

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4 minutes ago, GreenspointTexas said:

Anyone else concerned a tad about Marions recruting chops/development?

 Not if you are.

7 minutes ago, GreenspointTexas said:

Anyone else concerned a tad about Marions recruting chops/development?

What?

If Moore signs with Texas, that could potentially be 3 top 100 recruits at WR. 

5 minutes ago, IDIOTsavant said:

Sure you aren’t looking for the Baylor site?

consensually, of course

who can resist my gorgeous mid century old dad bod?

none can, my friend. none at all

24 minutes ago, TonyTexas said:

Are you Hindu?  If not, you could have used yourself as an example. 

Obviously.

<insert cow/IT/caste jokes>

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1 hour ago, UnhappilyMarried said:

 

Don’t count out Oklahoma. They’ve been pooling all their resources to get back in this. 
 



Money Cash GIF by Sleeping Giant Media

 

 

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Anyone else concerned a tad about Marions recruting chops/development?

How many times do you have to be relentlessly and ruthlessly mocked, berated and belittled until you realize that every thought that goes through your head is most likely incredibly dumb and should under no circumstances be posted?


Nvm, I answered my own question.

Hear me out, ja’had and Muhammad are the bomb squad? Like no bombs thrown on their watch, am I right guys? Guys? 
 

Chris Farley Reaction GIF by MOODMAN

2 hours ago, tejas60 said:

hope you threw that 2" snapper back.

Fuck that noise. A 2 inch snapper is the gift that keeps on giving. Unless it wants another 2 inch snapper for itself. 

2 hours ago, tejas60 said:

hope you threw that 2" snapper back.

Probably, but if not the dorado or marlin may have eaten him. 
 

Personally, I had a lot of fun catching the bait fish using 4 hooks and no bait - just jigging. I have a feeling that wouldn’t work nearly as well in Galveston.  

1 minute ago, utexas8 said:

Is Moore not signing today officially or is he at a later time

Gerry said he is probably not signing today.  To which Bobby said, if that happens he was told we would move on.  The implication being we don't like recruits who jerk us around unless they are top 50 kind of players, or we have a portal WR who we want to replace him with but who has a short expiration date, or both.  Probably the former.

12 minutes ago, ClubWhatever said:

Gerry said he is probably not signing today.  To which Bobby said, if that happens he was told we would move on.  The implication being we don't like recruits who jerk us around unless they are top 50 kind of players, or we have a portal WR who we want to replace him with but who has a short expiration date, or both.  Probably the former.

He explicitly said the latter while dancing around a name. 

24 minutes ago, Burt Macklin said:

Don’t count out Oklahoma. They’ve been pooling all their resources to get back in this. 
 



Money Cash GIF by Sleeping Giant Media

 

 



If I'm reading the tea leaves correctly, it's Texas with a walk-off home run.

43 minutes ago, GreenspointTexas said:

Anyone else concerned a tad about Marions recruting chops/development?

No

2 hours ago, Kwix said:

 

Pimpton to LSU and Moore still unsigned is about all the bad news there is for signing day 1.

Thanks no big loss there. I know some of the experts love pimp but I think this gives us a better shot at Duce. At the very least it keeps an open spot on the roster for late transfers. If a spring injury happens, it would be nice to have room for a replacement. 
 

My biggest concern with Duce is that he will play enough games to piss off our staff. Maybe it’s my imagination but to me it seems that the staff stops pressing when too much shit is happening behind the scenes. I’m sure @closetojumping will correct me if I’m wrong. 

52 minutes ago, irishtexan said:

I just finished my first beer of the day. I'll be there after about four or five more. 

Drunk in 5 to 6 beers? Pretty sure you're not actually Irish. 

39 minutes ago, satyanash said:

Obviously.

<insert cow/IT/caste jokes>

I should have checked the cricket thread before asking that question. 

3 minutes ago, Lou_Sassle said:

Drunk in 5 to 6 beers? Pretty sure you're not actually Irish. 

That’s what I drink to sober up.

4 minutes ago, Lou_Sassle said:

Drunk in 5 to 6 beers? Pretty sure you're not actually Irish. 

What if they are double IPAs?

38 minutes ago, Bevo said:

Thanks no big loss there. I know some of the experts love pimp but I think this gives us a better shot at Duce. At the very least it keeps an open spot on the roster for late transfers. If a spring injury happens, it would be nice to have room for a replacement. 
 

My biggest concern with Duce is that he will play enough games to piss off our staff. Maybe it’s my imagination but to me it seems that the staff stops pressing when too much shit is happening behind the scenes. I’m sure @closetojumping will correct me if I’m wrong. 

Duce could fuck Banks’ woman with her monkey and he would still welcome Duce with open arms. 

Duce could fuck Banks’ woman with her monkey and he would still welcome Duce with open arms. 

What if he fucked the monkey?
2 hours ago, satyanash said:

OTT, I've always found it interesting how name-religion link is defined differently in African-American communities. You have guys like Jordon Thomas and DeAndre Christmas-Giles who are Muslim. And you have many guys named Malik (common Arab Muslim name) or Muhammad who are Christian and such. In other countries there's more of a clear delineation.

So you are telling me that the guy with the last name Christmas is Muslim?

3 minutes ago, gmr548 said:


What if he fucked the monkey?

Checks height, checks 40 time….still  good 

Edited by Codaxx

2 minutes ago, Codaxx said:

Duce could fuck Banks’ woman with her monkey and he would still welcome Duce with open arms. 

 

2 minutes ago, Codaxx said:

Duce could fuck Banks’ woman with her monkey and he would still welcome Duce with open arms. 

This brings up a concern that I have. I believe that the monkey has not been given enough credit for our recruiting classes. What if the monkey decides to enter the portal? Where would we be then?

This brings up a concern that I have. I believe that the monkey has not been given enough credit for our recruiting classes. What if the monkey decides to enter the portal? Where would we be then?

If you had visibility to the monkey’s NIL deal you wouldn’t be concerned.
49 minutes ago, NWAustinDude said:

FCB is so cringe

spacer.png

He makes Chris Beard’s mugshot look good

1 hour ago, Herbie Hancock said:


How many times do you have to be relentlessly and ruthlessly mocked, berated and belittled until you realize that every thought that goes through your head is most likely incredibly dumb and should under no circumstances be posted?


Nvm, I answered my own question.

At first I wondered how I missed the question about Marion. Then I realized it was posed from Greenspoint, and I breathed a contented sigh of relief knowing that my ignore feature was still working properly. 

1 hour ago, Rimbo said:

I rate her at least a 3

On a scale of 1-3, with 3 being the hottest?  Yes, you're correct.

1 hour ago, Rimbo said:

that's how many men it would take to pull me off her

 

Case calls dibs on shotgun ... 🤪

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There are only two types of people in this world that offend me.  The first are people who stereotype and attack the character of innocent Muslims they don’t even know simply because of intolerance for their religion.  The second are Sunnis.  
Well Shiite son, iswydt. Well played
He makes Chris Beard’s mugshot look good
FCB branded gear sounds like a good NIL opportunity
8 hours ago, SydneyCarton said:

1.) Nice to see Mandel has continued to firmly entrench himself in the whiny old Abe Simpson bitch club.
2.) He thinks that "collectives" are delivering on promises made before or on signing day? He understands NIL about as well as aTm. Good thing they're in business together. 

 

 

- Blair Angulo (247) put in a CB (5 conf.) for Duce Robinson, to Georgia.  

- He says Duce will not sign until Feb, and talks about the MLB draft, etc..

- Says this about Texas/Duce

image.thumb.png.80e5a13fdca557af3a82dbf75a7bf277.png

 

38 minutes ago, gmr548 said:


What if he fucked the monkey?

Clint Eastwood Coffee GIF

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