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Well this explains everything....

I was conceived during a period when drinking during pregnancy wasn't a big deal

15 minutes ago, Neonmoon said:

I was conceived during a period when drinking during pregnancy wasn't a big deal

neither was smoking...

If I know my parents like I think I do, my father had a can of Old Style in his hand and my mom had a Winston Light 100 in her hand during my conception.  
 

and I read good and shit 

18 minutes ago, Lobo said:

If I know my parents like I think I do, my father had a can of Old Style in his hand and my mom had a Winston Light 100 in her hand during my conception.  
 

and I read good and shit 

Your mom still likes Winstons.

Won't anyone think of the children sperm?

Edited by bernorange

for most of the last 5000 years everyone has been drunk all the fucking time, but we're still here and we're smarter than ever.  sounds like bullshit to me. 

I was hungover the day the OB told us my wife was preeclamptic and we were having that baby TODAY...five days early...pissed me off as I was just getting into GTAV and thought I had a few more nights of playing it until 2am when my wife was going to bed at 7 and we had no other kids to worry about at the time.

10 hours ago, South Austin said:

Your mom still likes Winstons.

Jameis Winton's.

6 months and a year? Come the fuck on. Maaaybe for the first kid. 

"Do you have kids?" 

"Yes"

"Do you drink?"

"I said I have kids"

 

If it weren't for alcohol, there is no way I'd have kids.  That can be interpreted any way you want, and most are correct.

 

On 10/3/2019 at 10:28 AM, Neonmoon said:

I was conceived during a period when drinking during pregnancy wasn't a big deal

we know.

So, let me get this straight, the time when the mrs. is getting baby fever, stocking up on pregnancy tests, ovulation checkers, pre-natal vitamins, and hiring an interior decorator to come up with two completely different designs for the nursery, this is when I’m supposed to quit drinking bourbon?  Do I have that right?

1 hour ago, conVINCEd said:

So, let me get this straight, the time when the mrs. is getting baby fever, stocking up on pregnancy tests, ovulation checkers, pre-natal vitamins, and hiring an interior decorator to come up with two completely different designs for the nursery, this is when I’m supposed to quit drinking bourbon?  Do I have that right?

 

Then the big day has finally arrived -- you get to blow that magical load you've been saving while avoiding alcohol, hot tubs, laptops, porn, weed, sugar, milk, underwear, prescription drugs, etc, etc (did I miss anything?) for... Later you find out she's not pregnant, so now you get to wonder if your shit even works, and fuck you, you still can't take the edge off. Is there a study showing what stress does to sperm? 

On 10/3/2019 at 10:28 AM, Neonmoon said:

I was conceived during a period when drinking during pregnancy wasn't a big deal

My mom was a Janis Joplin type and long after she'd died one of her old friends told me that A) she was bisexual AF and B) that I was literally born on LSD. Mama was trippin' balls on the day I was born...Somehow I was the last to know she liked pussy as much as me. My much younger half-siblings all knew all along. (She abandoned me when I was about 8; she waited until they were older to abandon all them.)

My brother, who is an idiot, tried to get me over my shock by saying "Don't worry, MaC, mama loved the peen too."

Thanks, bro.

for most of the last 5000 years everyone has been drunk all the fucking time, but we're still here and we're smarter than ever.  sounds like bullshit to me. 

Are you suggesting that getting science/health/medical advice from media can be misleading?
 
Then the big day has finally arrived -- you get to blow that magical load you've been saving while avoiding alcohol, hot tubs, laptops, porn, weed, sugar, milk, underwear, prescription drugs, etc, etc (did I miss anything?) for... Later you find out she's not pregnant, so now you get to wonder if your shit even works, and fuck you, you still can't take the edge off. Is there a study showing what stress does to sperm? 

If you need help, I’ll dump a load in there for you.

I was the result of “one night stand” (parents met at a dive bar and certainly didn’t want a kid).  I’m 100% sure alcohol was a factor, so can I claim disability?  
 

FTR: my parents ended up finding each other and “dating” for ~30 years before getting married.   

5 hours ago, B00M said:

 

Then the big day has finally arrived -- you get to blow that magical load you've been saving while avoiding alcohol, hot tubs, laptops, porn, weed, sugar, milk, underwear, prescription drugs, etc, etc (did I miss anything?) for... Later you find out she's not pregnant, so now you get to wonder if your shit even works, and fuck you, you still can't take the edge off. Is there a study showing what stress does to sperm? 

Huh. Never had that problem. I’ve always gotten my wife pregnant the first month we stopped using protection. 

1 hour ago, UT_OB1 said:

Huh. Never had that problem. I’ve always gotten my wife pregnant the first month we stopped using protection. 

Yep, this is me too.  Threw the pants on the bed, bam two kids.  I literally know the exact dates of conception because I never used protection and didn't pull out twice.

Turns out, this is a really flawed study, and the headline isn't even from the study, but the separate opinion of one of the authors:

https://arstechnica.com/science/2019/10/researchers-completely-made-up-claim-about-mens-drinking-before-conception/

 

To reduce the risk of having a baby with a congenital heart defect, men should avoid drinking alcohol for at least six months prior to fertilization. At least, that’s the claim that researchers made in a press release last week. It's the same claim that multiple news outlets dutifully parroted in startling headlines and stories about the researchers’ study.

The problem is that the researchers’ study does not support that claim. In fact, the question of whether six dry months before fertilization could reduce the risk of congenital heart defects wasn’t addressed in the study. The researchers didn’t even have the data to know if any fathers abstained from alcohol for that long prior to helping form a babby.

It seems that the now-widespread recommendation was merely the researchers’ personal opinions, which were oddly included in the press release and don’t appear to be based on any evidence from their study or otherwise.

What their study did examine was whether a father’s alcohol consumption within three months before fertilization—or, mind-bogglingly, three months after fertilization—could influence the risk of a congenital heart defect. The researchers concluded that dad’s drinking in that six-month time frame did have an effect; it raised the relative risk of a congenital heart defect by 44%. The authors speculate that alcohol could cause subtle changes to DNA in sperm that could then lead to that elevated risk.

But even the conclusions that are based on data are questionable. A closer look at the researchers’ analysis reveals many troubling weaknesses and caveats. For one thing, it’s unclear how a father’s sperm—alcohol-damaged or not—could have any effect on a fetus after fertilization. The researchers also skim over the fact that men in their study who drank up to about 3.5 standard alcoholic drinks a day appeared to have less risk of fathering a child with a congenital heart defect than non-drinkers. And the researchers extended their risk assessment to fathers who might be drinking up to a whopping 500 grams of alcohol a day. Given that a standard alcoholic drink in the US contains 14 grams of alcohol, that’s nearly 36 drinks a day—a life-threatening amount of alcohol.

And that’s just the first sip of what’s in this mind-bending study. Let’s dive into the rest.

More in the link. 

On 10/3/2019 at 9:40 PM, Hanrahan said:

Well that looks like a bullet dodged. Weird.

 

On 10/3/2019 at 9:41 PM, Hanrahan said:

Well that looks like a bullet dodged. Weird.

Two bullets  apparently

I don't drink, so if your wife is hot you can pm me as a surrogate.

Edited by clapclapclap
Professional Altruist

I've seen the shit you fuck sober, you can't be making demands on his wife's hotness.  

No drinking 6 months before conception ?!  

What are they trying to do, kill off our species ?

 

EDIT:  But smoking weed's still OK right ?

Edited by Onboard 2.0

Ok, well the study was bullshit, I'm sure we're all completely surprised.

Now if the study had been 6 months drinking prior causes a "babby" to become a Surlist, that, I would have bought.

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