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Hell of a day to be a Longhorn- Texas beats UNC (again) to win Maui Invitational and stay undefeated. Then we go and hire one of the best CFB coaches in the history of the game. 
 

Damn it feels good to be a gangster 

I'm having to use two hands on my mouse....just to stay caught up in this thread!

Next time get the Honey BBQ Chicken Strip Sandwich, but substitute Honey Butter for the BBQ sauce. It's phenomenal.

Get a whatachicken and have them add a beef patty. I call it the Whatachow.
And this is why that if I shaved my head and beard I’d look like Ketchup.
9 minutes ago, CastHorn said:

Can y’all imagine the first home game if 100% occupancy is allowed by next fall? South end zone complete with fucking Urban Meyer leading the horns out? Fuck Ketch & his sand bag titties. 

The loudest Texas Fight of all time would bring a tear to my eye. Ok maybe two. 

24 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

Ha. Dude, I am from the north side of Pasadena. That means I grew up on the ship channel, in the chemical smoke, and everyone was poor as fuck and everything stank and was more or less miserable. There might be worse places in Texas, maybe, but Bastrop ain’t one of them. Sorry for your losses with the wood though. 

I spent most of March-June, then August, in Galveston. If you’re not there for the beach because you’re not a poor from greater Houston or Oklahoma down visiting, the rest of what Galveston offers for folks who live there is terrific. I haven’t been down in a few weeks and miss it immediately. 

I love Galveston. 
 

The contender I would submit for biggest shithole in Texas would be the poorly named Crystal City. 

3 hours ago, troph said:


Yeah I don’t know about hunting season so I could be wrong. Would still think there’s places to be discrete there with the conference center.

But to go completely undetected there and no leaks? That seems hard.

Remember - wearing those masks doesn't just help you to get away after robbing a bank.  It might just let you walk through a hotel lobby in a different city without being recognized.  I'm sure someone else either reserved the room and gave him the key, or gave him a phone with the digital key programmed into it.  I've gone 6-8 weeks of checking into Hiltons without hitting the front desk once.

5 minutes ago, TexasGolf said:

DA82DA55-997D-4403-B4DD-8478FEAC4D4C.jpeg

Another grifter using us to generate traffic.... All hail Surly

18 minutes ago, NoRagrets said:

I just want my kid to experience a magical season like I did in 2005, 2008, and 2009. Poor guy has only experienced the lost decade with the lone sugar bowl win as our crowning achievement. He thought Sam would be in the Heisman race this year. He thought we would easily win a down big12. Despite the 2020 Herman Shit Show, he still believes. He believes in UT more than he believes in Santa Claus at this point.

I'm probably a year or two older than your kid and graduating this year.  I still believe but a bad coaching hire after Herman will end my fandom.  I will probably still watch Baseball but that's about it because I feel like the team has never let me down.  

1 minute ago, PatSolitanojr said:

The loudest Texas Fight of all time would bring a tear to my eye. Ok maybe two. 

Shit.  That might happen at the spring game first. 

1 minute ago, GRHorn said:

I love Galveston. 
 

The contender I would submit for biggest shithole in Texas would be the poorly named Crystal City. 

Vidor would like a word

Well worth tanking this season to get Meyer. And a tip of the cap for Turtle Tom rolling out his greatest hits against Iowa State last weekend with that fake punt and 4th down try.

34 minutes ago, Urb Meyers said:

Long, long time follower of Texas message board and first time poster.

You guys rock on coaching searches. Absolutely amazing

To the people questioning HSB, well, you don't really know Horseshoe Bay. I grew up in the area and once worked there when I was young. There are areas of HSB that none of the middle class get to see. Stuff that is every bit as expensive, and nicer, than Lake Austin. You just can't get on it.

UT-Austin has a long standing relationship at HSB for decades and decades. They host golfing events for the athletics dept., etc out there every year, many of the top execs have homes out there, etc.

HSB is used quite frequently in coaching searches, as well. Much easier to hide someone in HSB than downtown Austin. Much easier to fly in the HSB airport than ABIA.

With that said, it is usually used when a deal is done or almost done. In other words, they wouldn't be trying to wine and dine Urban Meyer at HSB. At this point, they would just finishing up some paperwork and preparing for his introductory speech as the Texas football coach.

If Urban is in HSB, and it seems he may be, then Urban Meyer is the 31st head football coach in the history of Texas. I would expect Herman to fired very soon

Guys I'll be in HSB on Saturday and staying the night. House is a block from the resort.

11 minutes ago, Pato del Muerto said:

There’s a difference?

Yes we only have 2 championships.  LaMarque 4/5 maybe?

Just now, dec3169 said:

Remember - wearing those masks doesn't just help you to get away after robbing a bank.  It might just let you walk through a hotel lobby in a different city without being recognized.  I'm sure someone else either reserved the room and gave him the key, or gave him a phone with the digital key programmed into it.  I've gone 6-8 weeks of checking into Hiltons without hitting the front desk once.

you know I was running through the traps and just didn't in my mind think oh yeah covid masks.  Partly because I haven't been in a hotel since covid broke.  but yeah, he could go nearly undetected completely.  crazy how awesome that is.

6 minutes ago, TexasGolf said:

DA82DA55-997D-4403-B4DD-8478FEAC4D4C.jpeg

I'll temper my excitement until Fancy Boots confirms these reports

2 minutes ago, dec3169 said:

Remember - wearing those masks doesn't just help you to get away after robbing a bank.  It might just let you walk through a hotel lobby in a different city without being recognized.  I'm sure someone else either reserved the room and gave him the key, or gave him a phone with the digital key programmed into it.  I've gone 6-8 weeks of checking into Hiltons without hitting the front desk once.

I spent little league travel season parking at Hilton side entrances, using the stairways, and having the key sent to my phone. Never saw anyone. 

7 minutes ago, RGBIII said:

My family has a house down in Pirates beach and we love the hell out of it. Big RIP to cafe Michael Burger though

Didn't know it had gone bye bye.  Spot is about the best burger you'll find on the island....If you venture to the mainland Carlos's Beer Garden in League City makes a good one too.....Don't know if Tookies is still around in Kemah but they were pretty good.

 

Best oysters in Texas can be found at Gilholleys in San Leon.

Edited by TexasRenegade

That Horseshoe Bay resort must be a ghost town in early Dec in the middle of a pandemic. Perfect place to hole up and wait for Herman to get fired. 

5 minutes ago, TexasRenegade said:

Rudy and Pacos is phenomenal. As is the original Willie Gs, Gaidos, and for us burger lovers The Spot.

Fertittas crap can all fall into the ocean.

Gaidios sucks balls. 
 

Gumbo bar on the strand for the win. 

I believe none of this, but if we land Urban Meyer, I'll hoover a couple of rails off Tom Herman's tits to celebrate.

Wait, wut?

10 minutes ago, Best served cold said:

Oh please! Seadrift, Port Lavaca and Bloomington is where it really gets nasty!

I remember hearing on Houston talk radio in the early 2000’s that Port Lavaca and Cuero led the state in per capita aid’s cases in the state.  Both are confirmed shit holes.  Let’s not forget Yoakum in this talk either.

Edited by Hook1997

I hope they fire Herman and get a contract inked tomorrow. No sense in waiting for that meaningless k-state game. Gives urban a head start in recruiting

7 minutes ago, RGBIII said:

I’ve had it. I’ve also had them put ketchup on it instead of bbq and it was also awesome. They don’t miss

christmas party the office GIF

Crowell, Texas, is uninhabitable. Only motel where I've ever been issued a flyswatter at check-in. 

Fuck, trying to catch up on this thread is like trying to cut the head off a hydra. Every time I finish a page, two more grow in its place. 

Yep, it’s like fucking bamboo.

I'm done for the day, but if I wake up in the morning to a PDF of the signed contract, I won't be surprised. This is an ingenious group of SOBs. Well done, Assholes.

HELP!  Need the Urban in Texas jacket please.

Just now, jimmyjazz said:

I believe none of this, but if we land Urban Meyer, I'll hoover a couple of rails off Tom Herman's tits to celebrate.

Wait, wut?

Why don't you just fist yourself at that point. 

1 minute ago, TexasRenegade said:

Didn't know it had gone bye bye.  Spot is about the best burger you'll find on the island....If you venture to the mainland Carlos's Beer Garden in League City makes a good one too.....Don't know if Tookies is still around in Kemah but they were pretty good.

 

Best oysters in Texas can be found at Gilholleys in San Leon.

Yup, rona got it. Love the spot, but usually I’m too drunk to eat out anywhere or venture too far. I’ll take the golf cart to the country club and hit up Watermans, really good

Screw UM I'm here for the Galveston talk. Anyone down near Pirate's needs to get a cheesesteak from Hummel's. So legit. Owner is from philly. 

12 minutes ago, RGBIII said:

I tried the sweet n spicy bacon burger from Whataburger today...it was downright delightful 

I haven’t eat whataburger since they sold out to the firm up north. 
It’s just something I’m having a REALLY hard time getting over...it bothers me that they’re like, “We’re true Texan, blah blah blah” but yet they fucking SOLD ThE HELL OUT to a yankee firm.

 

Sorry to derail....

5 minutes ago, GRHorn said:

The contender I would submit for biggest shithole in Texas would be the poorly named Crystal City.

When we played them in JV football years ago, the referee flipped a peso for the coin toss.

10 minutes ago, IDIOTsavant said:

Maximum exposure would be to leak both during Game Day with Urban able to talk about it when Big Noon Kickoff starts an hour later... but I don't think they'll be able to keep it quiet that long.

If they mention it during Game Day, Herbie may cry again on camera 

18 minutes ago, Chili dog said:

Fuck, trying to catch up on this thread is like trying to cut the head off a hydra. Every time I finish a page, two more grow in its place. My wife is pissed at me because I haven’t spoken more than a grunt to her in three hours. I dread how far behind I’ve gotten just by taking the time to write this. 
And it sounds like some of y’all need to visit Killeen. 

I laughed my ass off on that hydra analogy.. well done sir

13 minutes ago, TexasRenegade said:

Galveston is great all around.  The beach down towards San Luis Pass is actually pretty deserted and can get fairly clear water.  Port A is better Beach wise but it's ridiculously crowded these days.

Port A beach is marginally better. But I’ve also had the trip where you show up and there’s massive stinky piles of seaweed stacked high. No bueno. Galveston restaurants and stuff for kids to do is light years ahead of Port A. 

6 minutes ago, JOSEYWALES66 said:

Shit.  That might happen at the spring game first. 

Too early to have capacity.  Vaccine won't be distributed enough by then.

3 minutes ago, theaveragejon said:

Gaidios sucks balls. 
 

Gumbo bar on the strand for the win. 

Gumbo is good. Gaidos seafood is good.....but their chocolate moose is transcendent.

 

Oh yeah and The Island has a big time Texas Ex and Offensive lineman for Mayor who is an awesome individual all around.

18 minutes ago, Pato del Muerto said:

There’s a difference?

to Texas City people.

Just now, NTVTXN said:

I haven’t eat whataburger since they sold out to the firm up north. 
It’s just something I’m having a REALLY hard time getting over...it bothers me that they’re like, “We’re true Texan, blah blah blah” but yet they fucking SOLD ThE HELL OUT to a yankee firm.

 

Sorry to derail....

I’m a sellout for sure. Same thing with karbach when they sold out, I talked a big game but now Crawford bock is about all I drink

1 minute ago, Rip76 said:

HELP!  Need the Urban in Texas jacket please.

 

6351D686-102A-4542-BFAC-9AE3CA8F57FA.jpeg

3 minutes ago, theaveragejon said:

Gaidios sucks balls. 
 

Gumbo bar on the strand for the win. 

Gumbo is good. Gaidos seafood is good.....but their chocolate moose is transcendent.

 

Oh yeah and The Island has a big time Texas Ex and Offensive lineman for Mayor who is an awesome individual all around.

11 minutes ago, TexasGolf said:

DA82DA55-997D-4403-B4DD-8478FEAC4D4C.jpeg

first surly smells smoke and gets to work, a few 995 bones out there (kudos to Burton), then surly all but confirms through first class detective work and a mountain of circumstantial evidence, then outlets like SI say there are rumors that have legs, then shitrags break the story, then ketch brags about getting more subscribers with another coin toss update, then the story breaks mainstream, and we talk about just about anything from mayo to guns to burgers to how many championships UM will win as we wait for the official announcement.  folks we did the work.  well I mean I did offer to go to ABIA on the wrong night to stalk the runways, but had no takers, so it's really we not just the royal we.

4 minutes ago, Houston20 said:

I hope they fire Herman and get a contract inked tomorrow. No sense in waiting for that meaningless k-state game. Gives urban a head start in recruiting

Wouldn't it be the craziest if the offense blew the top off without Herman on the sidelines?  Find out he's been handicapping it this whole time.

Just now, Penche Gringo said:

 

6351D686-102A-4542-BFAC-9AE3CA8F57FA.jpeg

Always gets a Hook Em from me

4 minutes ago, Pato del Muerto said:

I spent little league travel season parking at Hilton side entrances, using the stairways, and having the key sent to my phone. Never saw anyone. 

I would have as well but I was contracting and the company used those damn WEX random credit card numbers.  Every 4-6 weeks one wouldn't work.  I hated those, and honestly that was one of the reasons I left and went permanent with the company I was contracted out to.  Well, that and the fact that they moved me from hell in Florida back to Texas again.

What’s the damn squid 🦑 twitter handle @ ???

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