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6 hours ago, derpyhorndog said:

Damn, when you put it that way, it really delivers the message in a different and more compelling way than the last 100 posts in which you've expressed the same sentiment. Maybe if you rephrase the same thing on every new page of this thread it'll convert some of the others. 

wow.  this whole thread is 66 pages of “gee I really wish urban comes here. the insiders are saying he will.” 66 pages of the same exact uninformed, ignorant bullshit.  but I try to drop just a little bit of knowledge on you ignorant shit stains and in return for my gesture of love I get hit with anger, sarcasm, ridicule.  this board is sad. 

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7 hours ago, futureman said:

ever.  

I hope you like lions.

2 minutes ago, futureman said:

wow.  this whole thread is 66 pages of “gee I really wish urban comes here. the insiders are saying he will.” 66 pages of the same exact uninformed, ignorant bullshit.  but I try to drop just a little bit of knowledge on you ignorant shit stains and in return for my gesture of love I get hit with anger, sarcasm, ridicule.  this board is sad. 

The fun and whole point of this thread is centered entirely on speculating about the (albeit very unlikely, some would say zero) possibility that Urban finds his way to UT. The thread would literally would not exist if everyone was, like you, informed and not ignorant and therefore believed there is without a doubt literally zero chance of it happening and not even entertaining to discuss.

Maybe go start a "Urban is not coming here, you morons" thread and spend time in there listening to either crickets or your own curated echo chamber of intellectuals while lubing up your turd cutter. And since we're idiots but not hypocrites,  you'll be totally justified giving grief to anyone that wanders in your thread to scream -- "It COULD happen and you're all dumbasses for only talking about how/why it's not going to" -- you know, because those people would kind of be defeating the purpose / running contrary to the purpose of your super fun thread.

TL; DR: You've made your position known countless times. It's noted, no one cares and reiterating it every time you have a bowel movement with Tapa in hand contributes nothing to the discussion or purpose of the thread. And you don't know shit about what is going to actually happen here, none of us do. It's all speculation and the odds being in favor of your prediction don't change that. 

22 minutes ago, futureman said:

wow.  this whole thread is 66 pages of “gee I really wish urban comes here. the insiders are saying he will.” 66 pages of the same exact uninformed, ignorant bullshit.  but I try to drop just a little bit of knowledge on you ignorant shit stains and in return for my gesture of love I get hit with anger, sarcasm, ridicule.  this board is sad. 

angry fist shake GIF

1 hour ago, Valmy77 said:

Media members, the 9.95 club, are the ones who have been floating this Meyer thing. If they are wrong well it would hardly be the first time. But why are you acting like we, the fans, need to find a reasonable choice and the fact we haven't means something?

It's the same scenarios as Texags. They dish out what the fanbase wants to hear. The demand starts with the fan base, the supply is generated to meet demand. It's a profit deal. 

9 hours ago, TheGhost said:

My choice is Matt Rhule if he learns to stop spitting on himself. But don't think he leaves the NFL.

Matt Ruhle has a 7 year, $70 million deal with something like $60m guaranteed.

Matt Ruhle is 10 games into his NFL career.

Matt Ruhle brought a ton of folks he was friends with or part of his coaching tree with him.

Matt Ruhle isn't going to leave those guys, end any chance of ever coaching in the NFL again and piss off a billionaire even if Texas matched at say 6/$60 guaranteed.

Shit all over Urban, but the odds of Texas getting Urban Myer to coach next year is several orders of magnitude higher than Ruhle (which is literally zero)

Stop being a moron - or more likely a shitty troll.

 

 
Meyer has all that already at Ohio State 
With his wife not too far from all their friends and family
 
Meyer isn't coming here.
 
My choice is Matt Rhule if he learns to stop spitting on himself. But don't think he leaves the NFL.
If the fanbase had a reasonable choice to replace Herman I am all for it. 
But no one does. They bought into the Meyer bait. 
Don't want to have to come back and tell people in 2 years told you so if we do fire Herman and look like shit when everyone turns us down. 
Best move is to wait for a coach because Herman isn't Charlie Strong.
5-7 is far different than 8-10 win seasons 

Haha, Matt Rule. You will be...

If Urban decides to coach again, there are probably only two schools that he'd seriously consider. Texas and USC. He'll want big resources and a major brand, although I don't believe the culture at USC is a good fit for him. He's already done Florida and Ohio State; OU and Alabama are not options; LSU is trashy and Baton Rouge is a hell hole; I wouldn't see him going to Michigan and facing his old program head to head.  Texas has the resources, the brand and is better culturally aligned with Urban. 

  • Author
2 hours ago, futureman said:

wow.  this whole thread is 66 pages of “gee I really wish urban comes here. the insiders are saying he will.” 66 pages of the same exact uninformed, ignorant bullshit.  but I try to drop just a little bit of knowledge on you ignorant shit stains and in return for my gesture of love I get hit with anger, sarcasm, ridicule.  this board is sad. 

Do you think you could actually fit your fist into your asshole?

14 minutes ago, derpyhorndog said:

Don't think it has been but it's behind a paywall. 

Spoiler

Despite Tom Herman’s self-confidence, Urban Meyer’s allure may prove too powerful for Texas to ignore

Meyer has a track record as one of college football’s greatest coaches, which will be difficult for the Longhorns to resist.

By Kevin Sherrington
6:23 PM on Nov 17, 2020

Tom Herman’s thoughtful, nearly five-minute reply when asked Monday about his job security tells you that he was prepared for the occasion. He didn’t vent or sneer or bite any sportswriter’s head off. Cool and reasoned in the face of the inevitable, he faced facts and made his case.

Problem is, Herman’s record is no longer the elephant in the room at Texas.

The elephant has a name, and it’s Urban Meyer.

Herman can still make a nice season out of this pandemic-induced wreck of a year in college football, but he won’t win three national titles before Christmas. He won’t even win his first in this, his sixth season as a head coach. Which is what Meyer did, in case you were wondering.

Finishing strong with wins over Kansas, Iowa State and Kansas State and another bowl victory to plump up his career record to 5-1 would certainly give Herman a better platform, but it won’t be as powerful as the stage on Fox’s Big Noon Kickoff every Saturday.

And if you don’t think a regular TV gig does anything for your poll numbers, you missed the political story of the century.

Love or loathe him, Urban Meyer is one of the greatest coaches in college football history, not to mention one of only a couple who can go toe-to-toe with Nick Saban. When he retired from Ohio State two years ago after a suspension for protecting an assistant with a history of alleged domestic abuse, Meyer seemed done. He’d quit two high-profile jobs after a pattern of questionable behavior either by players or staff at Florida and Ohio State. His exits were also driven by health problems related to a grinding work ethic. Had he simply receded into seclusion, no one would have begrudged him a long and blissful retirement.

But here he is, at 56, his name in speculation for jobs at Texas and USC and maybe Michigan, mostly because of what he says these days on TV.

Remember this from Oct. 3, when he pointed out the NFL draft records of certain schools?

“How do you evaluate the roster of a college program, especially a blueblood program like Texas? It’s called the NFL draft. When you see this graphic here, it just takes your breath away that first round picks — they have top 10 recruiting classes every year. However, it doesn’t show up in the NFL draft. You look at a school like Alabama, Ohio State — top 10 classes, but they have 32 first-round draft picks and Ohio State, 18, respectively. Now Texas, with three. So that’s the what.”

But he didn’t stop there. He told viewers why Texas hadn’t shown up in the draft. Evaluation, for one thing. Also development, from weight training to nutrition to coaching.

And then he added the kicker, straight to his former assistant’s gut:

“If the NFL draft doesn’t start showing more Texas Longhorn players every spring, it’s going to be the same old story.”

You could attribute the nature of his candid remarks to an alleged feud between Meyer and Herman. Might even be true. But it’s not just Texas. Every week on Fox, Meyer says something to make you think he’s not doing TV just to enhance your viewing experience.

Last week, after his co-panelists, Matt Leinart, Reggie Bush and Brady Quinn, gave their thoughts on what USC needed to do to beat Arizona, Meyer changed the course of the conversation. Bush and Leinart, the panel’s USC faction, focused on the work of offensive coordinator Graham Harrell. Now, I like the pride of Ennis, too. Who doesn’t? Not only is he fun to talk to, a rarity in football, he apparently ran off with North Texas' offense. The Mean Green haven’t been the same since he left. He’s so good, he might also save Clay Helton’s job, which, frankly, seemed just about impossible.

But when the USC guys threw it over to the coach on the panel, Meyer showed no inclination to talk pitch-and-catch. Instead, he asked, where are the great offensive linemen the Trojans once produced? Where’s the “tenacious” defense?

Meyer wasn’t interested in the mind-numbing minutiae of what it would take to beat a Kevin Sumlin team Saturday. He talked big picture. Big-time programs win on the backs of large men shoring up both sides of the line. Defensive linemen may not be sexy, but great ones are harder to find than quarterbacks and cornerbacks. You can dress up your offense as pretty as can be, but you don’t win national titles without big uglies.

By the way, do you know the last Texas defensive lineman drafted in the first round?

Malcom Brown, in 2015.

Anyway, this is the message Meyer preaches from his Fox pulpit. Every week, his flock grows. Like any populist, he gives the masses what they want, which is a simple answer. Here’s what’s wrong with your team. Here’s how you fix it. Here’s how you win a national title.

Coaches often take TV gigs to remind boosters and athletic directors that they’re still alive. Mack Brown comes to mind. But not even Mack did a better job of demonstrating why he’s still relevant, and it’s that argument, and not Kansas or Iowa State or Kansas State, that should keep Herman up at night.

One of these days, and probably soon, Texas or USC or Michigan or someone else dying to win will make Meyer a coach again. You just watch. If you don’t already, that is.

 

26 minutes ago, BurntOrange&White said:

Do you think you could actually fit your fist into your asshole?

Two, easily. And then clap.

If Urban decides to coach again, there are probably only two schools that he'd seriously consider. Texas and USC. He'll want big resources and a major brand, although I don't believe the culture at USC is a good fit for him. He's already done Florida and Ohio State; OU and Alabama are not options; LSU is trashy and Baton Rouge is a hell hole; I wouldn't see him going to Michigan and facing his old program head to head.  Texas has the resources, the brand and is better culturally aligned with Urban. 


Agreed. This is what I’m hanging my hat on.
43 minutes ago, BurntOrange&White said:

Do you think you could actually fit your fist into your asshole?

Probably not with his head already up there.

52 minutes ago, Woodrow Call said:

If Urban decides to coach again, there are probably only two schools that he'd seriously consider. Texas and USC. He'll want big resources and a major brand, although I don't believe the culture at USC is a good fit for him. He's already done Florida and Ohio State; OU and Alabama are not options; LSU is trashy and Baton Rouge is a hell hole; I wouldn't see him going to Michigan and facing his old program head to head.  Texas has the resources, the brand and is better culturally aligned with Urban. 

I don't see LSU firing Ed yet.

LSU could never afford him.  Ed O had to take a pay cut this year because the school is in such bad financial shape.

1 hour ago, BurntOrange&White said:

Do you think you could actually fit your fist into your asshole?

maybe. 

  • Author
1 minute ago, futureman said:

maybe. 

It better be full on fist. None of that 5 finger cone shit, straight up wrist deep. 

Edited by BurntOrange&White

46 minutes ago, closetohumping said:

I don't see LSU firing Ed yet.

I agree. I'm just going through a list of elite programs and where each might stand. It's obviously an elite program where you can win a title, but for someone like Urban, it doesn't offer as much as Texas. 

4 hours ago, Valmy77 said:

What the hell are you talking about? We are just fans how the hell would we even know what was reasonable or not? We don't know shit. Do we know any of these coaches? Do we have any idea who would be a good fit here and how that interacts with who is interested? Of course not. So why are you so bizarrely focused on holding us accountable for not knowing shit we have no possible way of knowing? I mean you mentioned Matt Rhule, on zero basis of knowledge at all, you just pulled him out of your ass as an example of...what? Something reasonable? How the hell do you know what is reasonable?

Media members, the 9.95 club, are the ones who have been floating this Meyer thing. If they are wrong well it would hardly be the first time. But why are you acting like we, the fans, need to find a reasonable choice and the fact we haven't means something?

I thought Athletic Directors made those decisions not polls on Surly.

While I completely agree with you, I am compelled to counter with the challenge to show me one fan site for any sports team that isn't full of assholes who think they would do a better job as AD, HC, OC, DC, or even AC/DC.

12 hours ago, TheGhost said:

 

Then you realize that the OC and DC were fired 

No spring ball 

Even fall practice was different 

Not making the CFP with a brand new DC and not time to put his scheme in. 

Calling @Zeus and @TexasUnion out for repping this bullshit. I mean I already have one of you on ignore but maybe others don't. 

35 minutes ago, BurntOrange&White said:

It better be full on fist. None of that 5 finger cone shit, straight up wrist deep. 

Surly has very low, if any, standards in most areas. Apparently, fisting is not one of them.

Just now, Texasrocks said:

Surly has very low, if any, standards in most areas. Apparently, fisting is not one of them.

And don't you god damned skimp on the thick sharpies either. 

2 hours ago, BurntOrange&White said:

Do you think you could actually fit your fist into your asshole?

He sticks his foot in his mouth on the regular.

30 minutes ago, ztejas said:

Calling @Zeus and @TexasUnion out for repping this bullshit. I mean I already have one of you on ignore but maybe others don't. 

Thanks for the call out...laughed for the sheer stupidity of his comment (and overall line of argument), but perhaps confusion or rage is more in order. 

Just now, TexasUnion said:

Thanks for the call out...laughed for the sheer stupidity of his comment (and overall line of argument), but perhaps confusion or rage is more in order. 

Haha. That was honestly my guess. Who gives a fuck, he's in purgatory now, or making a new username. 

1 hour ago, BurntOrange&White said:

It better be full on fist. None of that 5 finger cone shit, straight up wrist deep. 

s-l300.jpg

While I completely agree with you, I am compelled to counter with the challenge to show me one fan site for any sports team that isn't full of assholes who think they would do a better job as AD, HC, OC, DC, or even AC/DC.

It’s a short list to surpass AC/DC, all the others, I’ll allow it!
2 hours ago, ztejas said:

Calling @Zeus and @TexasUnion out for repping this bullshit. I mean I already have one of you on ignore but maybe others don't. 

Those are all valid points ghost made but whatevs tattle tail

Good luck putting all your hope in Urban Legend 🤣

I just upboat anyone on this thread that isn't rooting against Texas and butting their eggs onto the Urban basket

Edited by Zeus

29 minutes ago, Zeus said:

Those are all valid points ghost made but whatevs tattle tail

Good luck putting all your hope in Urban Legend 🤣

I just upboat anyone on this thread that isn't rooting against Texas and butting their eggs onto the Urban basket

You watched the blOwU game this year? They benched their freshman QB who tried to give the game away then put him back in to win the game anyway. Poor herman didn’t have time to practice with his new coordinators. That’s why we get field goals blocked, we can’t field punts cleanly, our senior captain lineman hits people in the back...what the fuck does any of that have to do with our OC and DC? If you can’t teach those things because there’s no spring practice then are you qualified to be a head coach? 

5 hours ago, BurntOrange&White said:

Do you think you could actually fit your fist into your asshole?

Should be a breeze considering the asspounding the past decade or so Longhorn football has inflicted on alums and fans of the program. A midsize Toyota might be “stretching it”.

Edited by Wishbone

34 minutes ago, WinningIsHard said:

You watched the blOwU game this year? They benched their freshman QB who tried to give the game away then put him back in to win the game anyway. Poor herman didn’t have time to practice with his new coordinators.

Preach that shit or whatever. That is the summary of that game. The least-prepared OU team we've seen in a couple of decades, benching their starting QB for two quarters, then putting him back in to beat us. Just fucking disgusting. Reverse roles and it'd have been my favorite RRS ever and I'd just laugh and laugh and laugh.

When did this become a thread about SA's mom?

8 minutes ago, BabaYaga said:

When did this become a thread about SA's mom?

You talking about SAFOD? South Austin Fist of Death? You need to go back a few pages and re-read.

2 minutes ago, Tex Long said:

You talking about SAFOD? South Austin Fist of Death? You need to go back a few pages and re-read.

gene-okerlund-andre-the-giant-hand.gif

4 hours ago, kevwun said:

LSU could never afford him.  Ed O had to take a pay cut this year because the school is in such bad financial shape.

didn't all Texas corches take pay cuts too?

16 minutes ago, UncleBuck said:

Preach that shit or whatever. That is the summary of that game. The least-prepared OU team we've seen in a couple of decades, benching their starting QB for two quarters, then putting him back in to beat us. Just fucking disgusting. Reverse roles and it'd have been my favorite RRS ever and I'd just laugh and laugh and laugh.

Don’t forget the part where somehow we started beating the shit out of them at the end of the fourth quarter, and when we had them ready for the KO punch...we kicked a FUCKING extra point because winning is really, really hard.

2 minutes ago, XYZ said:

Don’t forget the part where somehow we started beating the shit out of them at the end of the fourth quarter, and when we had them ready for the KO punch...we kicked a FUCKING extra point because winning is really, really hard.

Because he "wanted to let the D win the game"... As several have said lately, I thought at the time that statement was just a bullshit typical #MensaTom excuse for stupidity. After the last few weeks, I'm pretty certain it wasn't bullshit at all, just truth - it really was just plain stupidity.

1 minute ago, Tex Long said:

Because he "wanted to let the D win the game"... As several have said lately, I thought at the time that statement was just a bullshit typical #MensaTom excuse for stupidity. After the last few weeks, I'm pretty certain it wasn't bullshit at all, just truth - it really was just plain stupidity.

Son of a bitch I’m really starting to believe futureman has been Tom the whole time. I can hear the conversation in the headset “Tom this is a perfect opportunity to go for two and win this game bud”, “you’re stupid Mike, I’ll fist myself if our defense doesn’t hold them here and we win”, “ash you’re up bro.” “Tom we should have went for two there”. “Fuck you’re stupid too ash, I’ve hired morons oh and Meyer is never coming here you stupid assholes.” 

Remember how before last year’s loss to Baylor, Herman head butted Malcolm Roach (who was wearing a helmet) multiple times. Sure! We all do! Good stuff. Remember his response at the presser about the multiple head butts after the loss? Really good stuff. 

“My head is fine,” Herman said. “If the nation had been paying attention they would have realized, I did that my three years at Ohio State, two years every game at Houston so that was nothing new for me. Like I said, postgame, in my old age I had kind of gotten away from it. But I was pretty pumped up about the game and I know our guys were, too, and spur of the moment hit me.”

🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪

11 minutes ago, Nicole44 said:

Remember how before last year’s loss to Baylor, Herman head butted Malcolm Roach (who was wearing a helmet) multiple times. Sure! We all do! Good stuff. Remember his response at the presser about the multiple head butts after the loss? Really good stuff. 

“My head is fine,” Herman said. “If the nation had been paying attention they would have realized, I did that my three years at Ohio State, two years every game at Houston so that was nothing new for me. Like I said, postgame, in my old age I had kind of gotten away from it. But I was pretty pumped up about the game and I know our guys were, too, and spur of the moment hit me.”

🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪

Yokelism at its best.
Banner: “We don’t do yokel at Texas”.

Banner: “GTFO Tom”

32 minutes ago, Wishbone said:

Yokelism at its best.
Banner: “We don’t do yokel at Texas”.

Local Yokel of the Week!!!

local-yokel.jpg

5 minutes ago, LTtxfan said:

Local Yokel of the Week!!!

local-yokel.jpg

These fuckers wasted their money on the props (teeth, etc.) “the hamburger helper does fine just by itself” <cousin Eddy “Vacation”>

7 hours ago, Texasrocks said:

Surly has very low, if any, standards in most areas. Apparently, fisting is not one of them.

Dude, it's surly. C'mon. Someone on here would Fist Ed Orgeron for a nutty buddy bar. 

2 minutes ago, Spider2YBanana said:

Dude, it's surly. C'mon. Someone on here would Fist Ed Orgeron for a nutty buddy bar. 

Pretty sure we all know who you mean ...

Just now, wood said:

Pretty sure we all know who you mean ...

I didn't want to have to aim fists or anything...

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