February 7, 20205 yr 54 minutes ago, South Austin said: Ding, ding. First time since May 2019. How’s your butthole feel?
February 7, 20205 yr On 1/24/2020 at 7:57 AM, Hank_Hill said: This might be my longest consecutive streak ever. Curious who’s going to tap out first. If you ever get tired...
February 10, 20205 yr On 2/7/2020 at 7:12 AM, South Austin said: Ding, ding. First time since May 2019. That's not what your mom said
February 10, 20205 yr Ringing the bell again and making up for the dry spell of last year's divorce.Have you bought her a ring yet?
February 10, 20205 yr 6 minutes ago, DaysOff said: 2 hours ago, South Austin said: Ringing the bell again and making up for the dry spell of last year's divorce. Have you bought her a ring yet? Saving the ring for your mom, if she'll take me.
February 10, 20205 yr She seems ....naughty @Hank_Hill please pick up the white courtesy phone, we need an update
February 10, 20205 yr 42 minutes ago, 4th and 5 said: She seems ....naughty @Hank_Hill please pick up the white courtesy phone, we need an update Haha I actually had a dream last week that she found this thread through a friend and never talked to me again so I’m taking that as an omen for now. Too good to risk.
February 11, 20205 yr 3 hours ago, 4th and 5 said: You tapped out, didn't you...... Not a fucking chance
February 11, 20205 yr Saving the ring for your mom, if she'll take me.South Austin doing mom jokes again?
February 11, 20205 yr On 1/10/2020 at 6:38 PM, Hank_Hill said: Helped the Brazilian choose swimwear this morning between patients, which obviously led to a nooner when I got off. On 1/10/2020 at 6:54 PM, Steel Shank said: That's nice work, Hank. Surely not in front of the b-o-y Hank...
February 11, 20205 yr 5 hours ago, markstanco said: 17 hours ago, South Austin said: Saving the ring for your mom, if she'll take me. South Austin doing mom jokes again? Did I stop?
February 11, 20205 yr On 2/10/2020 at 11:13 AM, NeverMarryAStripper said: Is it a sign of old age that the first thing I thought when reading this was what exactly is the back stretch and how can I get one?
February 14, 20205 yr Author My birthday is on Valentine's Day. Sex is guaranteed. And don't even need to go out and spend a ton of money on dinner that will cost half as much tomorrow night.
February 17, 20205 yr On 2/10/2020 at 11:17 AM, NeverMarryAStripper said: On 2/10/2020 at 11:13 AM, NeverMarryAStripper said:
February 17, 20205 yr On 2/10/2020 at 11:17 AM, NeverMarryAStripper said: where does she dance ? asking for a friend
February 18, 20205 yr Most whores have three holes that are interchangeable and lawyers usually only have two.
February 18, 20205 yr On 2/14/2020 at 1:15 PM, BigDHornfan said: My birthday is on Valentine's Day. Sex is guaranteed. And don't even need to go out and spend a ton of money on dinner that will cost half as much tomorrow night. Cock blocked your dad many years then.
February 18, 20205 yr Author 4 minutes ago, workswithseed said: Cock blocked your dad many years then. Fuck him. Fucker split when I was 2.
February 18, 20205 yr 7 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said: How can you tell if they're a whore or a lawyer? Lawyers fuck people for money. Strippers just dance for money (sometimes)
February 18, 20205 yr 8 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said: How can you tell if they're a whore or a lawyer? If they're dead in the middle of the road, there will be skid marks before you get to the whore.
February 18, 20205 yr Most whores have three holes that are interchangeable and lawyers usually only have two. User name checks out for one of the holes.
February 18, 20205 yr 12 hours ago, BigDHornfan said: Fuck him. Fucker split when I was 2. Perhaps you cock blocking him is why?
February 21, 20205 yr Reporting in. 4 nights in a row...and the wife just texted me a bit ago and told me she wanted to go for 5 this evening. Life's good, gents. Carry on.
February 21, 20205 yr 23 minutes ago, NeverMarryAStripper said: She definitely has an ulterior motive I'm guessing she just went on a huge shopping spree that hasn't yet hit his credit card bill.
February 21, 20205 yr She definitely has an ulterior motiveOr she’s eyeing that new Lexus (especially if y’all are from Dallas).
February 21, 20205 yr 1 hour ago, Francisco 2.0 said: Reporting in. 4 nights in a row...and the wife just texted me a bit ago and told me she wanted to go for 5 this evening. Life's good, gents. Carry on. I hate you. Girlfriend of 5 years started losing interest in sex almost a year ago. She swears up and down it's not me or anything I've done and thinks it might be the start of menopause. I'd stick around and be patient in this but the problem is that she does fuck all to 'help me out' yet she expects fidelity... and she has gotten it. Broke up with her on Sunday. I had to tell her the truth, "I've come to realize that my best chance of having sex again begins with breaking up with you.". She agreed it's not fair....said she even considered letting me have a gal on the side if the idea didn't make her so jealous. I'm sure in a year or a few months or whenever this thing passes she'll wanna do the wild thing 5 times a day but I won't be around for it. FML. Edited February 21, 20205 yr by Marfa Low Crown
February 21, 20205 yr 1 hour ago, South Austin said: I'm guessing she just went on a huge shopping spree that hasn't yet hit his credit card bill. Nah, she has a job and her own credit (and we don't co-mingle finances). She may have done something similar, but I would never see the bill. 1 hour ago, Stunns38 said: Or she’s eyeing that new Lexus (especially if y’all are from Dallas). Now, that's a possibility. It's getting time to upgrade her ride. 54 minutes ago, Marfa Low Crown said: I hate you. Girlfriend of 5 years started losing interest in sex almost a year ago. She swears up and down it's not me or anything I've done and thinks it might be the start of menopause. I'd stick around and be patient in this but the problem is that she does fuck all to 'help me out' yet she expects fidelity... and she has gotten it. Broke up with her on Sunday. I had to tell her the truth, "I've come to realize that my best chance of having sex again begins with breaking up with you.". She agreed it's not fair....said she even considered letting me have a gal on the side if the idea didn't make her so jealous. I'm sure in a year or a few months or whenever this thing passes she'll wanna do the wild thing 5 times a day but I won't be around for it. FML. Been there, done that (with the ex, but that wasn't the reason she is an ex). Good for you being honest with her, and good luck.
February 23, 20205 yr On 2/21/2020 at 11:15 AM, Marfa Low Crown said: I hate you. Girlfriend of 5 years started losing interest in sex almost a year ago. She swears up and down it's not me or anything I've done and thinks it might be the start of menopause. I'd stick around and be patient in this but the problem is that she does fuck all to 'help me out' yet she expects fidelity... and she has gotten it. Broke up with her on Sunday. I had to tell her the truth, "I've come to realize that my best chance of having sex again begins with breaking up with you.". She agreed it's not fair....said she even considered letting me have a gal on the side if the idea didn't make her so jealous. I'm sure in a year or a few months or whenever this thing passes she'll wanna do the wild thing 5 times a day but I won't be around for it. FML. This guy...this guy is a fucking MAN.
February 24, 20205 yr Ding ding. I feel like a sexual Olympian compared to the second half of my 2019.
February 24, 20205 yr Should we split this thread into a single and married edition? For the same reason as the new car thread has 4x the posts as the classic one?
February 25, 20205 yr Unless it's something interesting like banging the old lady in the driveway on the hood (bonnet) of your car, or in a three-way with your hot Au Pair, who really wants to hear about you pounding the wife for the thousandth time.
February 25, 20205 yr 34 minutes ago, NeverMarryAStripper said: Unless it's something interesting like banging the old lady in the driveway on the hood (bonnet) of your car, or in a three-way with your hot Au Pair, who really wants to hear about you pounding the wife for the thousandth time. [raises hand]
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