Jump to content
View in the app

A better way to browse. Learn more.

Surly Horns

A full-screen app on your home screen with push notifications, badges and more.

To install this app on iOS and iPadOS
  1. Tap the Share icon in Safari
  2. Scroll the menu and tap Add to Home Screen.
  3. Tap Add in the top-right corner.
To install this app on Android
  1. Tap the 3-dot menu (⋮) in the top-right corner of the browser.
  2. Tap Add to Home screen or Install app.
  3. Confirm by tapping Install.

Featured Replies

  • Replies 798
  • Views 60.8k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Most Popular Posts

  • Horn Under a Bad Sign
    Horn Under a Bad Sign

    2020 in two photos:

  • Hornius Emeritus
    Hornius Emeritus

    So, believe it or not, more than a couple of readers have sent me messages/emails suggesting that I run for Cornyn's seat in six years. It's a crazy idea.  But when I get such messages in the future,

  • I’m a 4th generation Texan and I’m fucking embarrassed cause of fuckwads like you. You’re not ashamed of our representatives, that whole power thing that made our state uninhabitable, Hot wheels someh

Posted Images

  • Popular Post
Cornyn can go fuck himself. I hate what Republicans have become.

I hate to break it to you. This was always who they were. They just used to hide it better. They gleefully went along with traumatizing kids as a political football. They were always like this.

I haven’t laughed to tears in a long time. Thank you and Merry Christmas.

  • Popular Post

So he got hammered and decided to throw his wife under the bus? Is that called the Cruz?

7 hours ago, pyrohornIII said:

He's all hat and no cattle.  Always has been.  Reminds me so much of that picture of him on a horse in a parade.  That Buckaroo Cowboy fringy thing he wears along with his white hat.   

The idea that this is what Texans think of when they think brisket is about as far off as what he thinks they think a texan looks like in their eyes, drugstore cowboy.

Damn wish I could find that pic again.

image.png.e3f546599bab325b501cc80da6564b00.png

gene wilder morons GIF

Motherfucker.  That's worse than cutting it in half and putting it in a turkey pan.

Who the fuck vote for a guy that dresses like that?

Is that a blue Oxford shirt under that Tammy Wynette jacket?

Shit, I’m surprised they aren’t all wearing Nudie suits at this point. 

  • Popular Post

So, believe it or not, more than a couple of readers have sent me messages/emails suggesting that I run for Cornyn's seat in six years. It's a crazy idea.  But when I get such messages in the future, I'm just going to respond with photos of a fabulous brisket that I smoked and just ask "how hard could it be?"

 

I don't know the first thing about Jewish brisket or Cornyn's wife (other than her husband is a piece of shit) but is that where the "it's Sandy's recipe" and "different ways to prepare brisket" path leads?

 

 

I sweatergawd, we’re minutes away from French dressing and a metal turkey pan, aren’t we?

Meh, "Jewish" brisket, aka roast beef, or sometimes corned beef, is fine as far as it goes.  It's actually a fairly superior form of roast beef for a "Sunday dinner."

But trying to relate it to "Texas brisket" in any way is a terrible fail.

Cmon guys. 
 

That pic was from a Dexter episode. 

Meh, "Jewish" brisket, aka roast beef, or sometimes corned beef, is fine as far as it goes.  It's actually a fairly superior form of roast beef for a "Sunday dinner."
But trying to relate it to "Texas brisket" in any way is a terrible fail.

And this. I’ve had Jewish braised brisket (braised in onions, coke, and other stuff), and it is great. But it’s not Texas brisket, and the bbq sauce tells us that’s what he was going for. He’s a fake piece of shit, serving a fake piece of shit. He showed us what he is. We should believe him.


Its first serve is essentially reheated leftovers lol.

is that a triple down? I don't think anyone would have asked for that recipe so it has to be a triple down (original post, wife, under the bus, and then the recipe)

He's going to need another shovel to keep digging that hole.

Edited by TexasEd

1 hour ago, Covri said:


Its first serve is essentially reheated leftovers lol.

cries GIF

For some reason being really, really dumb has become a badge of honor of the GOP.  

  • Author

So this for new year's, john?  I mean, it's probably not even whataburger spicy ketchup, amirite?

 

CqVMacFVYAAi-ky.jpg

  • Author
17 hours ago, Mdhorn said:

image.png.e3f546599bab325b501cc80da6564b00.png

gene wilder morons GIF

Thanks md.  saved it this time.

On 12/25/2020 at 11:12 AM, Underdog said:

Dickey's would be ashamed to serve that. 

 

That might be the most damning thing ever said about any politician in the history of Texas.

4 hours ago, Js1 said:

 


Is Sandy Cornyn from Ohio?  Because that sounds exactly like a Yankee recipe. I'm surprised it doesn't call for beans and spaghetti. 

2 hours ago, pyrohornIII said:

So this for new year's, john?  I mean, it's probably not even whataburger spicy ketchup, amirite?

 

CqVMacFVYAAi-ky.jpg

That looks terrible.

Only way to salvage it is to cut it in slices, refrigerate for 24 hours, and then cook again for 1.5 hours.

I bet Sandy has a really good recipe for vegetarian chili too.

On 12/25/2020 at 10:38 AM, pyrohornIII said:

He's all hat and no cattle.  Always has been.  Reminds me so much of that picture of him on a horse in a parade.  That Buckaroo Cowboy fringy thing he wears along with his white hat.   

The idea that this is what Texans think of when they think brisket is about as far off as what he thinks they think a texan looks like in their eyes, drugstore cowboy.

Damn wish I could find that pic again.

Not from Texas, and even I know what the Texas standard is for *brisket. That being said, did he give his aides the week off and handle his account on his own, because that right thar is a pretty good example of how not to Senator senator.  29 million constituents, some of whom don't have enough to eat and getting into a social media spat over a big slab of meat instead of thanking them for electing his sorry ass to stay in office is the epitome of politics today. Try asking your social media followers to tweet what they were thankful for or how they spend holiday times, John, so you can get to know them. Their answers may educate you, if you actually gave a damn.

 

 

*I've had brisket cooked lots of different ways, some good and some not so good. I respect the various ways and the subjective nature of food opinions. I'm thankful that my family has food and a place to prepare it, and in the time of NOT COVID, that we have been able to open our home to share it with others.

So he cooks it. Sticks it in the fridge. Then puts some sauce on it and cooks it again? WTF is that? Is he fucking insane? 

4 minutes ago, JimmyJames said:

So he cooks it. Sticks it in the fridge. Then puts some sauce on it and cooks it again? WTF is that? Is he fucking insane? 

yankee

16 minutes ago, JimmyJames said:

So he cooks it. Sticks it in the fridge. Then puts some sauce on it and cooks it again? WTF is that? Is he fucking insane? 

 

11 minutes ago, washparkhorn said:

yankee

why not both?

On 12/26/2020 at 9:32 AM, Hornius Emeritus said:

So, believe it or not, more than a couple of readers have sent me messages/emails suggesting that I run for Cornyn's seat in six years. It's a crazy idea.  But when I get such messages in the future, I'm just going to respond with photos of a fabulous brisket that I smoked and just ask "how hard could it be?"

 

 

Holy fuck! Need a campaign manager? How cool would it be if one of our own was a senator?  I'd vote for you.   Hey, if Fitlump can get her start on Surly by showing her boobs, anything is possible.  I take it you'd run as a Democrat?

 
111.gif.b6cb801a7559b1fe375196caf55df1b6.gif

What next Senator - Liquid Smoke?

If any Surly poster runs for Senate it should be GoLL, but he should run as PedoBear and never take the costume off.

Scott Walker doesn’t deserve his own thread, so I’ll put this here since it’s in the latest genre of “Republicans Self Owning On Social Media Over Shitass Food”.

5a6c55ebf4d9dac81a79e3f812f667a2.jpg
15d9e983666b6c8ce3225973257ac039.jpg
be1299d244ef4eeb77c2e5a825639834.jpg

1 hour ago, wildcat09 said:

If any Surly poster runs for Senate it should be GoLL, but he should run as PedoBear and never take the costume off.


I'd vote for him, too.  Although explaining why I would vote for "Ghost of Longhorn Lawyer"  or "Hornius"  might take some doing when it comes to my girlfriend.  Eh, fuck her. 

Scott Walker doesn’t deserve his own thread, so I’ll put this here since it’s in the latest genre of “Republicans Self Owning On Social Media Over Shitass Food”.

5a6c55ebf4d9dac81a79e3f812f667a2.jpg
15d9e983666b6c8ce3225973257ac039.jpg
be1299d244ef4eeb77c2e5a825639834.jpg

Wow. What an asshole.that’s fucked up more than cornyns brisket

tonette_walker_1522931626562_82971561_ve

Maybe Fun Fact:  Walker's wife, Tonette, auditioned to play one of the Small Faces at the local dinner club in Wauwatosa, WI.

21 hours ago, wildcat09 said:

If any Surly poster runs for Senate it should be GoLL, but he should run as PedoBear and never take the costume off.

Thank you.  I appreciate your confidence.  

But I will not run for, nor will I accept, the nomination of my surly party for the Senate of the United States.

7 minutes ago, Ghost of LL said:

Thank you.  I appreciate your confidence.  

But I will not run for, nor will I accept, the nomination of my surly party for the Senate of the United States.

Nobody cares about you. What about PedoBear?

1 hour ago, Ghost of LL said:

Thank you.  I appreciate your confidence.  

But I will not run for, nor will I accept, the nomination of my surly party for the Senate of the United States.

So you're saying that you wouldn't want to be a member of any party that will accept you as a member?

1 hour ago, Ghost of LL said:

Thank you.  I appreciate your confidence.  

But I will not run for, nor will I accept, the nomination of my surly party for the Senate of the United States.

The Surly Party is actually a great idea.  We could just go up there an air our grievances like Frank Costanza.  Except actual grievances, not the made up ones that the GOP currently espouses.

He’s posting nonsense again. At least he deleted this one.

25e37024223ba48f26bb22017486f1ce.jpg

(Bama Chick posted this tweet):

He’s posting nonsense again. At least he deleted this one.

25e37024223ba48f26bb22017486f1ce.jpg

 

 

 

 

pm9C94qp59y1jda2z8j2TSMd4jfLJH9mbfGPBGMZ

Edited by miguelito
quoting bama chick's tweet

tonette_walker_1522931626562_82971561_ver1.0_640_480.PNG
Maybe Fun Fact:  Walker's wife, Tonette, auditioned to play one of the Small Faces at the local dinner club in Wauwatosa, WI.

Steve Marriott?


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

Configure browser push notifications

Chrome (Android)
  1. Tap the lock icon next to the address bar.
  2. Tap Permissions → Notifications.
  3. Adjust your preference.
Chrome (Desktop)
  1. Click the padlock icon in the address bar.
  2. Select Site settings.
  3. Find Notifications and adjust your preference.