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Fitlump fucking won a Austin City Council seat, Now on to Congress 2026!

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Now that the Texas gop is pouring resources into this race, we really need to figure out how to anonymously out her at the last minute.

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Why wouldn't she have her daughter with her during a campaign election watch party?

It didn’t fall during her one supervised visit a month.

Maybe if someone who witnessed her antics could vouch for them to jack@austinpolitics.net and he’ll at least report it if traditional newscasters won’t.

Yeah, Austin Monitor/Glasshouse Policy would also run with such a story. 

I do find it odd that some of her biggest detractors are the biggest supporters of her biggest supporters.  

Edited by Lobo

Why wouldn't she have her daughter with her during a campaign election watch party?
I don't think she has custody
  • Author

Just as our numbers are starting to trend back up, it's good to see a Disaster Scientist's team following standard pandemic protocols of masks and physical distancing.

 

 

 

Argh, feel like you guys want her to win for the lols

On 11/6/2020 at 8:04 PM, atomheartbevo said:

Why wouldn't she have her daughter with her during a campaign election watch party?

Because the conversation with the family law judge probably went something like this:

Fitlump:  "Your honor, I'd like to request a special visit with my daughter despite the current visitation arrangement.  It would be for a Tuesday Election watch party in which I am running for office as you know."  

Judge: "Okay, I'd consider something like that.  It would be good for her to see her mother in one of her finest hours.  Where is this held and what kind of people are attending?"

Fitlump: "Pinballz of North Austin."

Judge: "Oh, so like a kid's arcade around dinner time?"

Fitlump:  "Not really.  A fun center which becomes a bar of debauchery after sunset.  Our watch party will be 7-10pm and attended largely by white supremacists.  But she'll have lots of extra tokens and pizza."

Judge: "Uh, how about I grant a  movie night in 2021?"  

Edited by Lobo

On 11/4/2020 at 11:22 AM, atomheartbevo said:

tenor.gif?itemid=7731496&f=1&nofb=1


 

Spoiler

 

Pallet cleaner for your eyes

image.png.8f1e76fdc05bf7a23b3efa1c8b369a85.png

 


 

 

Edited by washparkhorn

I'm just shocked a pair of high heels from Payless lasted that long. 

Nevermind, forgot she spent most of her campaign on her back. 

If there a photo album with all her photos over the years somewhere?

20 hours ago, Pasken said:

Argh, feel like you guys want her to win for the lols

100%

Why doesn't she have custody of her daughter? 

1 minute ago, Pasken said:

Why doesn't she have custody of her daughter? 

If you have to ask...

21 hours ago, Pasken said:

Argh, feel like you guys want her to win for the lols

It took 1800+ posts to figure that out?

18 minutes ago, Jerry Callo said:

It took 1800+ posts to figure that out?

I thought people learned their lesson after Trump that it's not all fun and games when you let pathological lairs in political office. 

17 hours ago, Deej said:

Whoever wins, Austin loses.

For the most part.  Kelly obviously won't have any (meaningful) impact when she wins, least so far as policy is concerned.  The council's overall makeup isn't changing at all and its direction sure as shit isn't either. So her voice won't make any difference - anything she says or supports, idiotic or otherwise, will disappear like a fart in the wind.  But, yes, she can and will provide immense, and likely endless, entertainment value.   

The council is already a circus.  And with any circus adding clowns has no downside and only tremendous upside.   

 

 

14 hours ago, Pasken said:

If there a photo album with all her photos over the years somewhere?

Wish there were. Needs to be printed and mailed to various media outlets along with the timeline someone put together that recapped all of her shenanigans. My personal "favorite" is the blue body paint pic. Her in all of her glory.

41 minutes ago, El Diablo said:

Wish there were. Needs to be printed and mailed to various media outlets along with the timeline someone put together that recapped all of her shenanigans. My personal "favorite" is the blue body paint pic. Her in all of her glory.

 
 
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A moment of silence, please: these (now-retired) high-heels walked a lot of homes, stood hours at polling places & crossed the stage at many forums. This picture is proof that we have a long way to go to our goal of winning the runoff. Help us win here: http://mackenzieforaustin.com
 
 
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On 11/7/2020 at 11:48 AM, Pasken said:

Maybe if someone who witnessed her antics could vouch for them to jack@austinpolitics.net and he’ll at least report it if traditional newscasters won’t.

If someone was having a virtual chat with Jack Friday, where could such a person find the best summary of the whole MK experience? Theoretically, of course.

  • Author
19 minutes ago, Gatorubet said:

Is Romeo Rose among the living?

Chicago based on his last YouTube videos, but that was a while back.  Not sure what happened to him.  

He needs to pop up and campaign for her.  That would be icing on the shit cake of 2020.  

Edited by atomheartbevo

6 hours ago, TKthunder2 said:

Pretty sure they just handed her a win.  This isn’t going to go over well with that district.

https://www.newsradioklbj.com/austinlocalnews/2020/11/09/austin-city-council-may-lease-out-another-hotel-for-covid-homeless/

Yeah, Flanigan is not happy about this getting out there this week.  I'm sure he'll vote to punt it until after the run-off.  

Holy shit though---$182,000/month for 5 months to "lease" an 84-room hotel.  That's $2,170/room or roughly the same price as a B-Class 2-bedroom apartment.  Plus $700/room in "cleaning and restoration."  Isn't the whole point of a hotel, that they clean up after you?  And what is "restoration" meaning for a hotel room?  There's nothing to restore, the property is only like 4 fucking years old.  Let's call it $250k all-in because it will cost $9,000 for some employee at City of Austin to handle payments and assign rooms.  

So our brilliant City Council's best negotiating pitch to Fairfield/Marriott was basically: "I see here that your rack rate is $85/night on these rooms.  Since we're booking the entire hotel for 5 months with guaranteed government money...our final offer is to pay you $95/night given the bulk discount nature of the booking.  And we'll pass those savings on to the taxpayers."  

You know what...fuck it.  Fitlump deserves to win.  Why not?  This council can't get anymore fucking insane.  

Edited by Lobo

Lol @ at the Austin CC. They are whores just like fitlump.

3 minutes ago, Armybrat said:

Lol @ at the Austin CC. They are whores just like fitlump.

Yeah, and at least she's been honest about it.  I'm starting to come around on the idea that she may as well get up on that dais because she's insane enough to publicly call them out on their shit (even if she doesn't understand any the maths involved).  

8 hours ago, TKthunder2 said:

Pretty sure they just handed her a win.  This isn’t going to go over well with that district.

https://www.newsradioklbj.com/austinlocalnews/2020/11/09/austin-city-council-may-lease-out-another-hotel-for-covid-homeless/

She's got another weapon (pun intended), which that moderate NW district will definitely react to:  Homicides jump  to 20 year high.  However, it's not some huge spike, but yes, it's a 20-year high with 1 1/2 months left.

https://www.kvue.com/article/news/verify/austin-homicide-rate-highest-20-years-abbott-police-defunding/269-4f334329-b0d8-48d5-9147-0c06d0549d97

Although most of them happened before "defund the police", this is a pretty easy slam-dunk for a normal candidate between this and the homeless stories.

But she's not a normal candidate (dumb as a box of rocks).  However she does have some seasoned people advising her.

I think there's a pretty damn good chance she pulls this off (just like her top in her strip.. er diaster scientist/brave firefighter/star lingerie football player job.  She only finished 2 points down to Flanagan.  He's got trouble.  LOL, she might win this thing.
 

She will shut up as soon as she is on the skim payroll.

  • Author
9 minutes ago, phdhorn said:

She's got another weapon (pun intended), which that moderate NW district will definitely react to:  Homicides jump  to 20 year high.  However, it's not some huge spike, but yes, it's a 20-year high with 1 1/2 months left.

We have at least 400,000 more people than we did 20 years ago, so I would expect such rates to rise over time.  

2 hours ago, Lobo said:

Yeah, Flanigan is not happy about this getting out there this week.  I'm sure he'll vote to punt it until after the run-off.  

Holy shit though---$182,000/month for 5 months to "lease" an 84-room hotel.  That's $2,170/room or roughly the same price as a B-Class 2-bedroom apartment.  Plus $700/room in "cleaning and restoration."  Isn't the whole point of a hotel, that they clean up after you?  And what is "restoration" meaning for a hotel room?  There's nothing to restore, the property is only like 4 fucking years old.  Let's call it $250k all-in because it will cost $9,000 for some employee at City of Austin to handle payments and assign rooms.  

So our brilliant City Council's best negotiating pitch to Fairfield/Marriott was basically: "I see here that your rack rate is $85/night on these rooms.  Since we're booking the entire hotel for 5 months with guaranteed government money...our final offer is to pay you $95/night given the bulk discount nature of the booking.  And we'll pass those savings on to the taxpayers."  

You know what...fuck it.  Fitlump deserves to win.  Why not?  This council can't get anymore fucking insane.  

The council is a tribe of clowns. But they're not funny clowns, just idiotic ones.   

At least Kelly will provide some comedic value.   

1 hour ago, atomheartbevo said:

We have at least 400,000 more people than we did 20 years ago, so I would expect such rates to rise over time.  

Austin grew by 400,000 people since 2019?

59 minutes ago, Wally Pryor said:

The council is a tribe of clowns. But they're not funny clowns, just idiotic ones.   

At least Kelly will provide some comedic value.   

I wonder if she’ll buy a new dress?

1 hour ago, atomheartbevo said:

We have at least 400,000 more people than we did 20 years ago, so I would expect such rates to rise over time.  

Yes, but obviously politics is a matter of message and timing.  It couldn't be worse in this one for Flanagan.  Not saying this makes it a gimmee, but when you combine increased homicide with "a homeless place in your neighborhood" in the most conservative district of Austin, it's gonna help her - a lot.

4 minutes ago, Armybrat said:

I wonder if she’ll buy a new dress?

 

She has 2.   

What more would you expect?

 

  • Author
14 minutes ago, Armybrat said:

Austin grew by 400,000 people since 2019?

No, over 20 years since it was mentioned as a 20 year high. 

I think she's got a 50/50 chance of winning and it's a coin flip at this moment unless the local media and the Flannigan campaign go there. And for the record, I don't think they should and I hope they don't. 

17 minutes ago, atomheartbevo said:

No, over 20 years since it was mentioned as a 20 year high. 

But the huge increase in murders is since last year.

4 minutes ago, Armybrat said:

But the huge increase in murders is since last year.

Well of course we have more murders, we have more people.  More people=More murders.  Have you not been paying attention to 2020?  

Perfect Murders!  

22 minutes ago, Lobo said:

Well of course we have more murders, we have more people.  More people=More murders.  Have you not been paying attention to 2020?  

Perfect Murders!  

Well it's 50% higher than last year is it not? Pretty sure we don't have 50% more people this year than last.

Well, we have 50% more dead people.  Is that anything?  I'm sure city Council will attempt to solve the homicide problem by buying a hotel next year. 

16 minutes ago, ZB'Tejas said:

Well it's 50% higher than last year is it not? Pretty sure we don't have 50% more people this year than last.

It's concerning that it's going up, in any case, here are the actual numbers and the rates, for perspective.

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3 hours ago, Lobo said:

Yeah, and at least she's been honest about it.  I'm starting to come around on the idea that she may as well get up on that dais because she's insane enough to publicly call them out on their shit (even if she doesn't understand any the maths involved).  

How do you figure?

3 hours ago, Lobo said:

Yeah, and at least she's been honest about it.  I'm starting to come around on the idea that she may as well get up on that dais because she's insane enough to publicly call them out on their shit (even if she doesn't understand any the maths involved).  

Insanity isn't a requisite for calling out insanity. 

It could help, but it's not necessary.

It’s like the old saying my dad used to tell me.  “a fisherman always sees another fisherman from afar.”  

Edited by Lobo

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