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Fitlump fucking won a Austin City Council seat, Now on to Congress 2026!

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On 3/25/2021 at 2:56 PM, demos said:

At least she found a new dress

And she's getting a lot of use out of it. And I'm a horrible person for wanting to photoshop a Klingon forehead on to her.

Her makeup person is earning every single bit of their paycheck.

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She has a "Make a Wish" thing going on.

https://austinovertheedge.com/councilmemberkelly/

Quote

I am Austin City Council Member Mackenzie Kelly and I'm raising funds and awareness for Make-A-Wish® Central & South Texas by joining 150 people on June 5th, 2021, to go Over The Edge - literally!  Over The Edge challenges you to face your fears, catch your breath, step up to the edge and rappel from a downtown skyrise in the heart of Austin. 

@Brisketexan if you are up there on that edge, send pics when they do this.

4 minutes ago, atomheartbevo said:

And she's getting a lot of use out of it. And I'm a horrible person for wanting to photoshop a Klingon forehead on to her.

Her makeup person is earning every single bit of their paycheck.

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Abbott can't quite get the hand signal right. 

 

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Wait, I've got a VHS of this floating somewhere around in a closet

 

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On 4/14/2021 at 5:36 AM, Orange&White said:

"Heinous Whore" would be a great death metal band name.

Yes, but it's pronounced "Anus Whore" 

oh god somehow i ended up with a 'stand with Mackenzie Kelly and vote FOR prop b!' ad on my fb feed 🤣🤣🤣

my voting preference aside, i was soooo tempted to comment something, er, 'colorful', seeing as how i witnessed '8 days to new boobs!' from the beginning. 😄

but its fb so it's my real name, boo...i just hid the ad lol.

1 hour ago, atomheartbevo said:

And she's getting a lot of use out of it. And I'm a horrible person for wanting to photoshop a Klingon forehead on to her.

Her makeup person is earning every single bit of their paycheck.

Ezbhmg6XIAIbUEQ?format=jpg&name=large

 

But you did it anyway...?

1 hour ago, Lobo said:

Yes, but it's pronounced "Anus Whore" 

You’re British?

Those new boobs look like they migrated to her midriff. 

2 hours ago, atomheartbevo said:

Holy shit.

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Glad she was able to reunite with one of her parents. 

Did she have Romeo Rose flashbacks when she saw the horse?

  • Author
2 hours ago, Deej said:

Did she have Romeo Rose flashbacks when she saw the horse?

Or she was thinking what might have been with @MissingInAction had they hooked up.

For the record, I'm not saying MIA is hung like a horse. But I'm not saying he's not hung like a horse either.

  • Author

Ezbhmg6XIAIbUEQ?format=jpg&name=large

Quote

Abbott can't quite get the hand signal right. 

 

larry.gif

 

He's not the first man to have made that sign when next to her.

Edited by atomheartbevo

4 hours ago, atomheartbevo said:

Holy shit.

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Even the horse was trying to get away from her... 

1 hour ago, atomheartbevo said:

Or she was thinking what might have been with @MissingInAction had they hooked up.

For the record, I'm not saying MIA is hung like a horse. But I'm not saying he's not hung like a horse either.

More like a Bronie.

Holy shit.
EzcdToeUUAEZnYp?format=jpg&name=medium
 

Someone needs to photoshop references to boys town and donkey shows on that.
5 minutes ago, Jkwellborn said:


Someone needs to photoshop references to boys town and donkey shows on that.

The horse does have a look of shame on it's face. 

1 hour ago, RPM said:

The horse does have a look of shame on it's face. 

Horse didn’t like the fish smell.

5 minutes ago, atomheartbevo said:

I'm guessing nobody caught her on the radio today

 

"One of you is the least-attractive person I've ever seen. I'm not gonna say who. Should I leave, or should you?"

People listen to Todd and Don?

Even Cactus Pryor wouldn't listen to his son.

22 hours ago, Deej said:

Did she have Romeo Rose flashbacks when she saw the horse?

200.gif

Dammit. Now I want to watch Hot to Trot. Why isn’t it streaming anywhere 

43 minutes ago, McFly said:

Dammit. Now I want to watch Hot to Trot. Why isn’t it streaming anywhere 

You can probably catch Sea Biscuit Lump Bizkit on Netflix.

What does that say about her politics, or mine, that whenever I see her latest campaign propaganda...all I think of is, "God, I hope she fucks that horse." 

Have you been in a coma for the last five years?  Politics is fetish now.  People get off more owning the other team than they do owning that pussy.  
 

now I’ll make it weird—-fitlump looks like she smells like old ham and menthols.  

33 minutes ago, Lobo said:

fitlump looks like she smells like old ham and menthols.  

Now you found my fetish

2 hours ago, Angry Gorilla said:

That says more about your fetish than politics

That says more about surly asshole fetishes than politics. We all think alike.

 

 

  • Author
On 4/20/2021 at 4:08 PM, atomheartbevo said:

She has a "Make a Wish" thing going on.

https://austinovertheedge.com/councilmemberkelly/

In thinking about it, this is how we should crowd-source/ban people on Surly - make them hook up rappel with FL.

She was a disaster scientist and volunteer firefighter, so if anything goes wrong, she can make a statement to the media.

 

I have to admit I'm severely disappointed in Austin. They let an obvious con/attention whore get a council seat. This was the most obvious slamdunk loss ever, but you elected her. No outing of her attention horse past. You guys get what you deserve with this one. Somebody has to nut up and expose her.

What mean "we", Tonto?  It was just the people of her district 6, and less than 8,000 of them.  

I'll say this for District 6, the 3 people they've elected thus far to Council have all been attention narcissists (can't type the word I really wanna say), but in very different ways.  Zimmerman, Flannigan, and now FitLump.  All are starved for adoration and attention, and go about in really different ways.  Anyway, it's only 3 so it's not a substantial set, but no other district has had this many council members already.  or at least this many crazy ones.  

 

Yep.  Austin dumped at-large districts in 2012 and of course in good bureaucratic fashion increased the incompetency from 6 to 10 members.  So even less voted for her than used to be the case per council member.

However, you are correct in that the dumbasses all over Austin voted in 2012 to change the system, so indirectly you're right.

22 hours ago, Deej said:

Even Cactus Pryor wouldn't listen to his son.

Which one, Paul or Don?

29 minutes ago, Lobo said:

What mean "we", Tonto?

Austin et al.

Nobody ran with her background. Whether it was a coordinated coverup or wimpy journalism somebody seriously dropped the ball. We all know who she is and what she's done. Pretty sure if I do a search of old hard drives I've got noods she posted.

On 4/20/2021 at 7:50 PM, Deej said:

Those new boobs look like they migrated to her midriff. 

Its okay tho. Former cam girls thicken with age.  I already replaced her with a new sharpie girl from twitch. 
 

 

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  • Author
2 hours ago, RPM said:

Austin et al.

Nobody ran with her background. Whether it was a coordinated coverup or wimpy journalism somebody seriously dropped the ball. We all know who she is and what she's done. Pretty sure if I do a search of old hard drives I've got noods she posted.

We discussed it last year - some people in the media knew, but didn't want to get in a situation where they were seen as shaming her or whatever - it could backfire and make her a martyr of sorts and/or drive up turnout for her amongst some male voters.

But I think the Lance Armstrong, Romeo Rose, etc. shit should have been absolutely fair game, along with the disaster scientist stuff.

As it turns out, it's possible to reveal the truth even when the truthers aren't in her district.

Fitlump getting elected was a monumental black eye on Austin.  The bizarro avoidance of "dirty politics" was incomprehensible.  If someone is a gold-digging, lying whore. the voting public (however small the district) should be made aware.

Considering their shape and hue, Her teeth must look like 32 individual, small carrots to that horse.  

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