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Featured Replies

4 minutes ago, FloridaHorn said:

I live an hour away from Orlando, and have been in Florida 10 years. Not one fucking time have my feet touched the ground at a Fisney park. For Christ sake, go to the beach, kayak or tube the springs, hike, literally anything other than Disney.

I'd agree,  but if your kids wanna go you should indulge em at last once.  Disney is still about being a kid.

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    Fantasy football/baseball/basketball/hockey.  If you have to follow professional sports pick a team.  Who has time for all that other nonsense that goes along with fantasy sports.

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2 minutes ago, Lobo said:

^

I can't believe "Hike Central Florida" hasn't caught on as a chamber slogan yet.  

(there is good kayaking, I used to live on the other side of you from Orlando in DeLand).  

Central Florida = Aligator Alley........now with huge man eating pythons...

I think he's farther North than that.  There's the Ocala National Forest and a bunch of state forests and conservation lands.  It's great hiking if you like spending time walking in a flat circle around various lakes and swamplands.  Mosquitoes that work in groups of a thousand. 

It answers the geographic splendor question, "What if Oklahoma was more Moist?"  We did a backcountry camping trip to Ocala about 25 years ago on some smaller lake within the federal lands.  One of the worst camping trips of my life and I woke up to a bear at RMNP shaking the shit out of my tent.  We went in the Winter and used concentrated Deet in both liquid and aerosolized form.  And still just spent the 2 days being mauled by the fuckers.  The lake was good but the "forest" swamplands were bullshit and made for a hike about as enjoyable as a root canal.  It is nice though that not everything in Central Florida is overpaved and overdeloped.  I'll give 'em that, there is still some conservation going on in that state between generic cities.  

Another thing I just really don't get:

All these seltzer boozy drinks.  I'm all for folks finding a cocktail that works for them, especially ones that are easily portable.  But there are just rules of biophysics that great taste and slick marketing can't overcome.  The ones I've tried are way more carbonated than beer.  After two, I'm just miserable and burping non-stop.  And the bloat in my chest and stomach is awful.  You can knock through 4 beers at a pool party or on a boat, but not 4 hard seltzers

 

16 minutes ago, Lobo said:

I think he's farther North than that.  There's the Ocala National Forest and a bunch of state forests and conservation lands.  It's great hiking if you like spending time walking in a flat circle around various lakes and swamplands.  Mosquitoes that work in groups of a thousand. 

It answers the geographic splendor question, "What if Oklahoma was more Moist?"  We did a backcountry camping trip to Ocala about 25 years ago on some smaller lake within the federal lands.  One of the worst camping trips of my life and I woke up to a bear at RMNP shaking the shit out of my tent.  We went in the Winter and used concentrated Deet in both liquid and aerosolized form.  And still just spent the 2 days being mauled by the fuckers.  The lake was good but the "forest" swamplands were bullshit and made for a hike about as enjoyable as a root canal.  It is nice though that not everything in Central Florida is overpaved and overdeloped.  I'll give 'em that, there is still some conservation going on in that state between generic cities.  

Another thing I just really don't get:

All these seltzer boozy drinks.  I'm all for folks finding a cocktail that works for them, especially ones that are easily portable.  But there are just rules of biophysics that great taste and slick marketing can't overcome.  The ones I've tried are way more carbonated than beer.  After two, I'm just miserable and burping non-stop.  And the bloat in my chest and stomach is awful.  You can knock through 4 beers at a pool party or on a boat, but not 4 hard seltzers

 

You're seriously overlooking the now with huge, man eating pythons experience.

6 minutes ago, Kennythetiger said:

I wonder what the Native Americans and early Europeans did to control mosquitoes. 

Good question. The natives just dealt with it with native plants or just good old fashioned mud. The Euros died by the droves I believe.

30 minutes ago, Kennythetiger said:

I wonder what the Native Americans and early Europeans did to control mosquitoes. 

Karankawa of the Texas Gulf Coast slathered up in a repellent they made out of mud, shark liver oil and alligator grease. 

1 hour ago, Kennythetiger said:

I wonder what the Native Americans and early Europeans did to control mosquitoes. 

They also probably avoided building massive retention ponds to off-set impervious cover which are responsible for a huge portion of the mosquito problem. 

Also my back neighbor in the Native American/Early European days would likely not be like my current back neighbor who just leaves random pots and plants in his backyard with gallons of stagnant water just sitting there all summer.  I at least got him to turn his abandoned satellite dish upside down in the grass since it was also collecting water and served as mosquito hot tub.  

I guess that's another thing I don't get.  How so many Texans are so oblivious to removing standing water around their homes.  Most of my neighbors have pools of water they don't deal with unless one of their yard guys takes care of it for them.  

1.  "Fisney"?

2.  We took our 2 kids to DisneyLAND around 12 years ago & the weather was semi-crappy (high's around 60, occasional light drizzle).  This was around the 10th of Dec. & school wasn't out.  Had a grand time - the various rides took longer than the line to actually get on & there were plenty of opportunities to simply get back on the ride again.  Additionally, this was when you could work the "multi-day prepaid pass" system where you would rent a ticket (card) from someone for less than the cost of the park's actual day ticket.  Excellent vacation.  If you have kids that aren't in school yet, I suggest you try this method out... doubt it would work for DisneyWORLD, however, because the weather situation in Dec. is vastly different.

Also... Disneyland has a Denny's directly across the street from the park entrance & if you can handle the walk, the food costs are vastly better than inside the park.  Eat there before you go in, snack in the park if you have to, exit for Denny's for dinner.

Looking forward to the time we can take our Gbaby to Disney.  

I am looking forward to when my sister and parents take my kids to disney while I fuck off.
15 minutes ago, Nivek said:


I am looking forward to when my sister and parents take my kids to disney while I fuck off.

This strategy is brilliant and so worth it.  My wife, mom, MIL and sister took my kids with the cousins three years ago.  I stayed back and GLADY watched the other one.  

eating/ drinking beer outdoors when it's 90+ degrees and humid AF, after you've busted your ass all day at work.

Yeah, bring on the AC.  Fuck the patio.

11 hours ago, Lobo said:

They also probably avoided building massive retention ponds to off-set impervious cover which are responsible for a huge portion of the mosquito problem. 

Also my back neighbor in the Native American/Early European days would likely not be like my current back neighbor who just leaves random pots and plants in his backyard with gallons of stagnant water just sitting there all summer.  I at least got him to turn his abandoned satellite dish upside down in the grass since it was also collecting water and served as mosquito hot tub.  

I guess that's another thing I don't get.  How so many Texans are so oblivious to removing standing water around their homes.  Most of my neighbors have pools of water they don't deal with unless one of their yard guys takes care of it for them.  

You must live in really shitty neighborhood. 

We prefer the term, eclectic.  He's actually in a completely different neighborhood that's oddly about a 7 minute drive from my house, or you can hop the fence.

I cannot wrap my head around what those homes are trading for right now.  I'd like to think I helped improve his street's property values by politely asking for the dish to be removed from the lawn.  

I don't get how "destination shopping"  is a thing.

i dont know what frank zappa is all about and at this point im too afraid to ask

20 minutes ago, 52-80 said:

i dont know what frank zappa is all about and at this point im too afraid to ask

Well.... he's dead so ya' can't ask him.  Seriously, if he wanted to be a normal musician he'd have been mainstream successful beyond belief IMO (not that that's the true mark of success).  An incredible musical talent, and smart as a mother fucker.

1 hour ago, 52-80 said:

i dont know what frank zappa is all about and at this point im too afraid to ask

He's the Central Scrutinizer. 

2 hours ago, 52-80 said:

i dont know what frank zappa is all about and at this point im too afraid to ask

He’s a muffin, man.

6 hours ago, 52-80 said:

i dont know what frank zappa is all about and at this point im too afraid to ask

Who could imagine?

On 7/12/2021 at 12:07 PM, jeevsie said:

If this isn't played at my funeral, I will pull on toenails from the afterlife.

If I ever hear it played again I'm going to pull my toenails out and cram them through my eardrums.

On 7/13/2021 at 5:16 PM, NeverMarryAStripper said:

Holy shit this.  My ex used to buy this anti-aging/anti-wrinkle shit.  It came in a container about the size of one of those little Carmex containers with the screw on lid and cost like 200 bucks.

Shit, I remember when I found out my ex spent between $800-$1000 dollars a month on makeup and stuff all I wanted to do was chop her up and hide the body.  This was back in the early 80's and we were struggling like crazy financially...then consider the fact that she had turned down several promotions at Tesoro Petroleum because it would have been stressful...arrrrggghhh

Edited by SHOOTER12

On 7/14/2021 at 8:31 AM, Armybrat said:

 

3CD9E7F9-72A0-4C4C-9380-710C6E71D13D.jpeg

St. Mary's Catholic Church?

12 minutes ago, Whatever said:

St. Mary's Catholic Church?

No that's the pre-reformation Vatican. Brat gave Luther a piece of his mind.

22 minutes ago, Whatever said:

St. Mary's Catholic Church?

Yep, June, 1967. Mrs. Brat attended the parochial school there and then went to Taylor High School. 
She is a Fightin’ Taylor Duck and former drum majorette of the Taylor HS Band.

 

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Edited by Armybrat

Come out Virginia, don't let 'em wait.  You Catholic girls start much too late.

On 7/10/2020 at 11:16 AM, RDCanecutter said:

 

Any club/church/organization with a precise rule-defined hierarchy. That pecking-order shit is for baboons.

 

Hey...that's not fair. Don't lump me in with fucking churches. 

On 7/20/2021 at 6:18 AM, 52-80 said:

i dont know what frank zappa is all about and at this point im too afraid to ask

Titties and beer.

21 hours ago, Armybrat said:

Yep, June, 1967. Mrs. Brat attended the parochial school there and then went to Taylor High School. 
She is a Fightin’ Taylor Duck and former drum majorette of the Taylor HS Band.

 

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Love a woman in uniform....  especially a cheerleader, drum majorette or pom pom girl...  I've dated 'em all.

2 hours ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

Love a woman in uniform....  especially a cheerleader, drum majorette or pom pom girl...  I've dated 'em all.

At Band Camp?

2 hours ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

Love a woman in uniform....  especially a cheerleader, drum majorette or pom pom girl...  I've dated 'em all.

I preferred them out of uniform, but to each his own.

10 minutes ago, davidg said:

I preferred them out of uniform, but to each his own.

That's where you end up......

People who drive duallies that obviously have never been used for any kind of work.  Perfectly clean, waxed, tires shiny, immaculate interior.  What the fuck?  They're work trucks.

6 hours ago, Scheiss Meister said:

People who drive duallies that obviously have never been used for any kind of work.  Perfectly clean, waxed, tires shiny, immaculate interior.  What the fuck?  They're work trucks.

Do you even aggy culture bro?

2 hours ago, nnm said:

Do you even aggy culture bro?

Thank God I'm on the outside so I can't understand it.

10 hours ago, Scheiss Meister said:

People who drive duallies that obviously have never been used for any kind of work.  Perfectly clean, waxed, tires shiny, immaculate interior.  What the fuck?  They're work trucks.

Deep water fording kit on a Lexus SUV… in West Texas.  Really?

2 hours ago, slorch said:

Deep water fording kit on a Lexus SUV… in West Texas.  Really?

Sometimes you have to ford the vehicle to cross the water.  Your other options are to caulk the vehicle and float across, take a ferry across, wait to see if conditions approve, or get more information.  You choose wrong, next thing you know...your kid's got dysentery.  

People who put “Air Force Retired” or the like on the back of their vehicle. So what? You don’t see mechanical engineers doing that.

46 minutes ago, Patricio Swayze said:

People who put “Air Force Retired” or the like on the back of their vehicle. So what? You don’t see mechanical engineers doing that.

Maybe they are proud of their service. 

21 minutes ago, After irth said:

Maybe they are proud of their service. 

His point is someone who worked for 35 year as a land surveyor or on the factory line @ the Cheerios plant doesn't label their vehicle in a similar fashion.

20 years in the Air Force is nothing to sneeze at.  I have drank with lots of Air Force veterans, including my uncle.  They are infinitely more fun to hang out with than mechanical engineers.  They can put that shit on their car all day long as far as I am concerned.  

1 minute ago, ROFL BOX said:

His point is someone who worked for 35 year as a land surveyor or on the factory line @ the Cheerios plant doesn't label their vehicle in a similar fashion.

Well…duh. 

15 minutes ago, After irth said:

Well…duh. 

Well... I was responding to him, not you.

3 hours ago, Patricio Swayze said:

People who put “Air Force Retired” or the like on the back of their vehicle. So what? You don’t see mechanical engineers doing that.

Veterans, especially combat vets, get a pass.

People who drive duallies that obviously have never been used for any kind of work.  Perfectly clean, waxed, tires shiny, immaculate interior.  What the fuck?  They're work trucks.

I really enjoy seeing lowered dualies.
1 hour ago, mininghorn88 said:

Veterans, especially combat vets, get a pass.

Yeah, the dudes with very specific details about their service on their car stickers, license plate frames, and/or old man mesh hats just seem like they're sending out a Bat Signal to others like them as a way to find lost friends or kindred spirits or whatever. 

Edited by Prepuce of Doom

20 years in the Air Force is nothing to sneeze at.  I have drank with lots of Air Force veterans, including my uncle.  They are infinitely more fun to hang out with than mechanical engineers.  They can put that shit on their car all day long as far as I am concerned.  


I don’t doubt your uncle isn’t cool. But there are plenty of regular Joe’s, like engineers, that have spent their careers in dangerous and exciting places (refineries in Nigeria, platforms in the North Sea, etc) and plenty of Air Force personal that never left a desk or got remotely close to any action.

Veterans, especially combat vets, get a pass.


Agreed. But can’t tell that from a generic sticker. What happened to bad ass motherfuckers that don’t need to broadcast it.

I realize this is an unpopular opinion in a country where military worship is a big deal. But that is why I don’t get it.

Neg me if y’all must.
1 hour ago, Patricio Swayze said:

 


I don’t doubt your uncle isn’t cool. But there are plenty of regular Joe’s, like engineers, that have spent their careers in dangerous and exciting places (refineries in Nigeria, platforms in the North Sea, etc) and plenty of Air Force personal that never left a desk or got remotely close to any action.



Agreed. But can’t tell that from a generic sticker. What happened to bad ass motherfuckers that don’t need to broadcast it.

I realize this is an unpopular opinion in a country where military worship is a big deal. But that is why I don’t get it.

Neg me if y’all must.

 

Your opinion is fine.   Martyrdom denied.

FYI-  we make fun of much of the shit you see out there in public too.  The Marine with 20 stickers on the back of their vehicle is a prime candidate.

I own one Marine t-shirt and I just wear it around the house when I mow or do yardwork.  I do have Army and Navy t-shirts/ polos, because I'm proud as fuck of my boys.  I won't apologize for that, but neither do I expect homage or salute from anyone out there who crosses my path.  The "common bond" thing does resonate among us.

to be fair to the thread, there's an Air Force mechanical engineer out there somewhere and odds are we've all fucked his wife. 

But patricio---to your point, there are certainly occupations that are called to armpits of the world to do some crazy shit, stuff I couldn't fathom in my wildest dreams as civilian work.  I did a short deal with DIA/DoE.  Wasn't scary in a life in danger kinda way, but it was sure as shit a wild departure from everything I'd ever known.  But the difference between chAIR FORCE desk jockeys and other occupations who are likely in even more challenging "work lanes" is the Pentagon can just up and tell those guys, "We got some shit happening, you're gonna be stationed in Afghanistan while re-establish drone air superiority for the next 12 months."  And that guy has to go or else he goes to prison.  The mechanical engineer can get the same call and say, "fuck it, keep my stock options...I'm gonna work on my cousin's startup."  

Edited by Lobo

I worked straight through Covid in WalMarts...

Medal of Freedom, on deck.

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