August 25, 20205 yr First session is on me!!! 🤍 As many of you know, I’ve been training to become a certified crystal master healer for almost a year and am ready to start my practice. Crystal Healing Session w/ Meditation & Crystal Singing Bowl Sound Therapy!!! I’m offering all family & friends a free 30 minute crystal healing session, if this is your first time working with me. We will balance chakras, clear energy with sound therapeutic crystal singing bowels, and remove blockages that have you anxious or discouraged, etc. I am also practicing the removal of spinal pain by moving stuck energy, which can be caused by trauma and stress, as well as other issues. If you’d like to upgrade to 1 hour, I will also incorporate a guided meditation made just for you! Or, you can opt for an extended sound bath with hand-blended essential oil blends. I will send you home with a small clear quartz sphere, or another crystal depending on what you need at that time. Please PM me to book a free session for 30 mins, or receive an entire hour and only pay $45! After your free session, Introductory rates are $50 for 30 mins and $95 for an hour!
August 25, 20205 yr Extended sound bath? Is that like jamming to Nickelback turned up to 11 on the drive home? Edited August 25, 20205 yr by slorch
August 25, 20205 yr 10 hours ago, Neikea said: First session is on me!!! 🤍 As many of you know, I’ve been training to become a certified crystal master healer for almost a year and am ready to start my practice. Crystal Healing Session w/ Meditation & Crystal Singing Bowl Sound Therapy!!! I’m offering all family & friends a free 30 minute crystal healing session, if this is your first time working with me. We will balance chakras, clear energy with sound therapeutic crystal singing bowels, and remove blockages that have you anxious or discouraged, etc. I am also practicing the removal of spinal pain by moving stuck energy, which can be caused by trauma and stress, as well as other issues. If you’d like to upgrade to 1 hour, I will also incorporate a guided meditation made just for you! Or, you can opt for an extended sound bath with hand-blended essential oil blends. I will send you home with a small clear quartz sphere, or another crystal depending on what you need at that time. Please PM me to book a free session for 30 mins, or receive an entire hour and only pay $45! After your free session, Introductory rates are $50 for 30 mins and $95 for an hour! BUT HOW DO WE PAY YOU?!
August 25, 20205 yr 11 hours ago, Neikea said: with sound therapeutic crystal singing bowels, and remove blockages that have you anxious I had Taco Bell for lunch yesterday and my bowels sang last night and removed all blockages so I'm gonna take a pass on your services at this time.
August 25, 20205 yr You're too kind - referring to my bowels as "singing." My gastroenterologist calls it more of an angry shouting.
August 25, 20205 yr 12 minutes ago, BurntEyes said: OP is full on sarcasm right? That's the joke right? No way this is serious, right? You clearly need your Chakra realigned.
August 26, 20205 yr Can we do this in a hot tub?If so, then how will anyone get pregnant?Sent from my SM-G950U1 using Tapatalk
August 26, 20205 yr Author 6 hours ago, NoName said: BUT HOW DO WE PAY YOU?! Hello I have both Pay Pal and Venmo
August 26, 20205 yr when my chakras are aligned, i blow a tremendous wad out of my penis, but i does need a little stimulation. does your free session come with a happy ending?
August 26, 20205 yr 1 hour ago, crash_davis said: when my chakras are aligned, i blow a tremendous wad out of my penis, but i does need a little stimulation. does your free session come with a happy ending? Does it matter to you what gender Neikea ascribes to?
August 26, 20205 yr 8 hours ago, ROFL BOX said: Does it matter to you what gender Neikea ascribes to? It’s they!
August 27, 20205 yr Okay, well, uh ... candlesticks always make a nice gift, and uh, maybe you could find out where she's registered and maybe a place-setting or maybe a silverware pattern. Okay, let's get two! Go get 'em!
August 30, 20205 yr My wife had a headache last night so I went out with the guys. After a few beers, I got to thinkin' that I would love for some nice young lady to align my chakra.
September 3, 20205 yr On behalf of all surly horners, we will have to decline. Maybe those at www.texags.com can step up to the plate and take advantage of this offer. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Pro
September 4, 20205 yr Is any part of the therapy process either curated or hand-crafted? I really have come to expect at least one of those in every experience. It's my new normal.
September 6, 20205 yr this shit really works. fyi, you may end up in a northeast austin warehouse, but that's just an artifact of the transcendental sukshmal worm hole. the shackles are for your protection and will disintegrate upon the final internal mandala emission. it doesn't hurt that neikea has some rats.
September 10, 20205 yr On 8/25/2020 at 2:38 AM, Neikea said: As many of you know, WTF? Why was I kept out of the loop?
March 10, 20214 yr Author Bump! Now that the Governor has lifted all of the restrictions, I'm offering a sale on in-person alignments with TONS of hand-charged clear quartz! I can also set up individual and group info sessions where I will tell you about colors of crystals and how they aid with connecting us to deeper knowledge and personal growth. Everyone has 7 main chakras. Let me break down the colors and why they help us open up our personal energy stations! LMK! Edited March 10, 20214 yr by Neikea 🤍
March 11, 20214 yr On 3/10/2021 at 2:42 AM, Neikea said: Bump! Now that the Governor has lifted all of the restrictions, I'm offering a sale on in-person alignments with TONS of hand-charged clear quartz! I can also set up individual and group info sessions where I will tell you about colors of crystals and how they aid with connecting us to deeper knowledge and personal growth. Everyone has 7 main chakras. Let me break down the colors and why they help us open up our personal energy stations! LMK! are these like Robert Kraft alignment sessions? are you a chick? are you a cop? you have to tell us if you are
March 14, 20214 yr If I tip well can we skip Chakras 1-6? My Root Chakras is all I need worked on today. The full alignment and hand charging.
March 14, 20214 yr Let’s see I could light my money on fire or work with you and get the same results
March 16, 20214 yr On 8/25/2020 at 8:07 PM, Neikea said: http://assandtitti.es/crystal.jpg That looks like it should clear the blockage. Which side goes in?
April 2, 20214 yr On 3/14/2021 at 12:18 AM, Your Mom said: If I tip well can we skip Chakras 1-6? My Root Chakras is all I need worked on today. The full alignment and hand charging. Shouldn't "Sacral Chakra" really be labeled "Stink Chakra"? BTW, this procedure will do nothing for me. It will never surpass the Dr. Johnson "Ring Dinger". Edited April 2, 20214 yr by Shaggy3.0
April 8, 20214 yr 2 hours ago, Pescado_Rojo said: How much to breach my root chakra? Asking for a friend. for you? free. your friend? also free. #nohomo
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