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Dunno if it’s the same everywhere but Halloween decor seemed to come out extra early around us this year. 

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The only good thing about decorations coming out early is it also means holiday Reese's pumpkins, trees are out. 

On 9/24/2024 at 6:26 PM, NeverMarryAStripper said:

I saw my first Christmas decorations this week.  Fuck that shit

Lowes here started putting out Christmas stuff a week ago.

Need ideas for across the street from this

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I’m thinking pitched battle

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  • 2 weeks later...

If only we had a Surly story about a Halloween lights tour as well... 

This would be worth getting our roll on:

 

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We went to the Night of 1,000 Jack-o'-Lanterns at the Chicago Botanic Garden on Friday night. Some really spectacular artistry on display. They had a bunch of different categories - movies, music, cartoons, sports, deep sea creatures, obituaries (people who died since last Halloween), etc., etc. 

But man, some of them smelled absolutely terrible.

 

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Edited by Prepuce of Doom

  • Author

In years past, I did my best to post update progress report photos from the Copse of Putrefication around the first of the month, but as my last updates indicated, all but one from last year (Milk Dud) went to shit, though Lemonhead left enough to make a little diorama or tableau setting. 

We also had an incident with one of the landscapers - I did my best to communicate "leave this shit alone" which apparently came across as "please make sure to remove all this shit" but I managed to salvage Milk Dud and the remnants of Lemonhead. I suspect that perhaps the landscratchers might have absconded with one, or maybe a varmint or just decay caught up with us - who knows. 

A few pictures from March and April that I never got around to posting:

 

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Here's this year's pledge class in their various stages of progression. 

Bought this one because of the funny little prolapsed anus. 

It appears to be the same species as Lemonhead from last year, so in an effort to discourage varmint consumption, I've made X-shaped eyes and a sort of slit-style mouth. The mouth is just a bunch of vertical-ish lines of holes, all of which I connected with a serrated blade. 

I fear that this one won't really come into its own until well after Halloween, but we'll see. 

 

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No idea whether this thing will endure the elements indefinitely or if it will decay into nothing, but I figured it was worth investigating. 

The exterior has the texture of soft peanut shells. I suspect it probably cures some diseases while likely causing others. 

It fits neatly into the carcass of Lemonhead. 

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This guy is a bright yellow, so Doomlet suggested that I try to make a smiley face. I used the same new "connect the dots" technique with it's mouth (eyes are still drilled and hammered according to tradition). 

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The final displays. 

 

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The OG is still the spookiest. 

Edited by Prepuce of Doom

Still love this sign from years ago. You can feel the rage in the Vieja that put it up. 

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  • Author

It hasn't even been four days. The weird thing with the "peanut shells" is doing fine, and so is the big reddish one, but the smiley face and the conventional pumpkin are getting torn up by varmints, and mold is also setting in for the conventional pumpkin (its lid has also fallen in on itself...). 

 

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2 hours ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

It hasn't even been four days. The weird thing with the "peanut shells" is doing fine, and so is the big reddish one, but the smiley face and the conventional pumpkin are getting torn up by varmints, and mold is also setting in for the conventional pumpkin (its lid has also fallen in on itself...). 

 

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They just don't make pumpkins like they used to.

On 10/29/2024 at 8:52 AM, Longboard Horn said:

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8 hours ago, Al Czervik said:

Still love this sign from years ago. You can feel the rage in the Vieja that put it up. 

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These bitches need to get their asses tricked. 

 

 

2 hours ago, High Plains Drifter said:

 

 

These bitches need to get their asses tricked. 

 

 

yea their lawns are getting trenched

In the lobby of my brother’s office building in SLC …

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Baby Dutch Yellow potatoes are proving to be every bit as popular as Ring Pops and Albanese gummi bears. 

 

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  • Author
4 hours ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

Baby Dutch Yellow potatoes are proving to be every bit as popular as Ring Pops and Albanese gummi bears. 

 

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I purposely put only one potato into the treat bowl at a time, and told everyone who remarked that there was only one potato allowed per group. 

Eight kids ultimately chose the potato, and there were two fights over the potato. One little girl told me that she would be back later, but she never returned. She'll probably throw a rock through my window later tonight instead. 

Edited by Prepuce of Doom

1 hour ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

I purposely put only one potato into the treat bowl at a time, and told everyone who remarked that there was only one potato allowed per group. 

Eight kids ultimately chose the potato, and there were two fights over the potato. One little girl told me that she would be back later, but she never returned. She'll probably throw a rock through my window later tonight instead. 

This guy does Halloween right.

On 10/4/2024 at 5:13 PM, Celery Man said:

Need ideas for across the street from this

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A house I pass on my morning walk:

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4 hours ago, Longboard Horn said:

These kids win Halloween 

 

If their mom dressed as Aunt Esther and their dad dressed as Grady, that whole family wins.

  • Author

Out of town for work right now, but got some distressing news about the Leathery Peanut Shell. Screenshot_20241107_070900_Messages.thumb.jpg.ee5c08ae25714c236a839a5a89465283.jpg

The others are allegedly safe and secure. 

  • 2 weeks later...
  • Author

It's Moving Day, when the husks go back into garage storage and the new crop moves from the front of the house to the Putrefication Copse in the back yard. 

But first, a few pictures of the new guys in the days following Halloween - the two colorful ones are getting destroyed by squirrels and perhaps other varmints. I threw down a little Victor-brand sachet of stinky minty shit the other day to discourage varmintry, and the little assholes ripped into that too. 

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And the one that leaked scum all over the porch is just shrinking down into nothingness. 

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Here's the bottom of Leathery Peanut Shell, and the teeming mass of life from underneath. 

I'm not entirely certain which picture is which. 

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Edited by Prepuce of Doom
Something is fucked with the picture uploads and I'm tired of fucking with it - you get what you get here...

  • Author

So just to double down on the voodoo shit, I kept one potato from the Halloween bag (it's already started to sprout!) and the little Post It note that I used to tally Potato Popularity, and I figured those things should be inserted inside one of the Demon Gourds for the winter. 

It's gross as hell in there already. Weird tiny bugs came flying out when I picked it up. 

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Edited by Prepuce of Doom

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