Jump to content
View in the app

A better way to browse. Learn more.

Surly Horns

A full-screen app on your home screen with push notifications, badges and more.

To install this app on iOS and iPadOS
  1. Tap the Share icon in Safari
  2. Scroll the menu and tap Add to Home Screen.
  3. Tap Add in the top-right corner.
To install this app on Android
  1. Tap the 3-dot menu (⋮) in the top-right corner of the browser.
  2. Tap Add to Home screen or Install app.
  3. Confirm by tapping Install.

A story about a pathetic man's downfall [34 Felony Convictions]

Featured Replies

Dog is used to being handled by the right hand.  Switching over so close to the President may have made the dog nervous and done something shifty in front of Trump which would make him shit his Depends.  Probably just said, "Thanks Mr. President", a nothing burger sadly.  I'm genuinely surprised they'd let a K-9 get that close to the President considering how dangerous they can be even with their handlers if the person unknown to them, right in front of them smells of hamburgers and fried chicken.  

  • Replies 41.1k
  • Views 3.3m
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Most Popular Posts

  • Beau Vine
    Beau Vine

    To be fair, President Trump’s four years in office weren’t so bad, except when when he incited an insurrection against the government, mismanaged a pandemic that killed nearly half a million Americans

  • Bama Chick
    Bama Chick

    Y’all about to get a great visual representation of Cullman, Alabama. Only good things to come out of Cullman are the Britt brothers (Roll Tide!) and orange rolls from All Steak restaurant. That pla

  • ChiTownDoc
    ChiTownDoc

    You seem really pissed off for a nontrumper.  Just laugh at the trumpers, bro.  They’re really gullible dumbfucks who worship this orange blob…you know, people completely unlike yourself.  

Posted Images

  • Popular Post
2 minutes ago, YGIFS said:

Dog is used to being handled by the right hand.  Switching over so close to the President may have made the dog nervous and done something shifty in front of Trump which would make him shit his Depends.  Probably just said, "Thanks Mr. President", a nothing burger sadly.  I'm genuinely surprised they'd let a K-9 get that close to the President considering how dangerous they can be even with their handlers if the person unknown to them, right in front of them smells of hamburgers and fried chicken.  

He should've yelled, "sic balls". 

4 minutes ago, YGIFS said:

Dog is used to being handled by the right hand.  Switching over so close to the President may have made the dog nervous and done something shifty in front of Trump which would make him shit his Depends.  Probably just said, "Thanks Mr. President", a nothing burger sadly.  I'm genuinely surprised they'd let a K-9 get that close to the President considering how dangerous they can be even with their handlers if the person unknown to them, right in front of them smells of hamburgers and fried chicken.  

First, that dude looked angry and clearly what he said rattled the man in adult diapers. Second, K9 dogs don't just go off. They have to be ordered to act, so it wouldn't have mattered if he switched hands.  That's not a signal. I'm still leaning towards he told him to fuck off and die. 

Considering they also based their PM election process on our Electoral College, you'd think they'd have some semblance of an idea.  I forget how in the fuck the Brits invented subtlety.  

59 minutes ago, DigglerontheHoof said:

He should've yelled, "sic balls". 

Whatever he said, that's what I heard.

On 7/25/2023 at 7:04 AM, speed817 said:

 

 

What this tells me is that most Brits are blissfully unaware that Texas A&M exists.

He said FUCK YOU ASSHOLE.


(Looks like he said I have a fake arm/hand)
(Dudes hand looks fake)
(One of the k9s prolly ate his hand)

5 hours ago, Horn Under a Bad Sign said:

 

 

 

this is so typical and such a scumbag move.

 
 
 
“They were Christmas presents for Jared”
1 hour ago, Gatorubet said:
7 hours ago, Horn Under a Bad Sign said:
 
 
 

“They were Christmas presents for Jared”

More believable than Christmas presents for Eric.

You sure about that, Mr. President?

"Why, yes I am.  In Israel, they celebrate Christmas as a festival of lights so they gave me these beautiful lamps."

Are you talking about Chanukah, the Festival of Lights, celebrated by Jews all over the world sir?

"What?  I'm not Jewish. Why would they give me gifts at Chanukah?  I celebrate Christmas."

  • Popular Post

I usually post without comment, so we can enjoy Gary’s work without my bullshit but holy fuck I lost it on this one.  🤪🤣

19 hours ago, DigglerontheHoof said:

He should've yelled, "sic balls". 

spacer.png

2 hours ago, ChiTownDoc said:

I usually post without comment, so we can enjoy Gary’s work without my bullshit but holy fuck I lost it on this one.  🤪🤣

spacer.png

17 hours ago, Sbbruin said:

this is so typical and such a scumbag move.

I have no doubt that he took them because he was sure at least one had a genie in it

17 hours ago, Sbbruin said:

this is so typical and such a scumbag move.

It restores a little balance to the universe. I predicted he’d steal the White House silverware when he left office. The fine China, paintings, statues…that sort of thing. I didn’t expect he was going to steal a bunch of classified documents, hide them, and refuse to return them when subpoenaed. So stealing rare foreign artifacts is staying more in character for him. That’s the sort of thing I was expecting. 

On 7/26/2023 at 1:27 PM, YGIFS said:

Dog is used to being handled by the right hand.  Switching over so close to the President may have made the dog nervous and done something shifty in front of Trump which would make him shit his Depends.  Probably just said, "Thanks Mr. President", a nothing burger sadly.  I'm genuinely surprised they'd let a K-9 get that close to the President considering how dangerous they can be even with their handlers if the person unknown to them, right in front of them smells of hamburgers and fried chicken.  

Yeah, I think he was apologizing for not shaking his hand because he had the dog on his leash. I hope I'm wrong but I doubt it.

 

6 hours ago, ChiTownDoc said:

I usually post without comment, so we can enjoy Gary’s work without my bullshit but holy fuck I lost it on this one.  🤪🤣

Goddamn, same here.

8 hours ago, ChiTownDoc said:

I usually post without comment, so we can enjoy Gary’s work without my bullshit but holy fuck I lost it on this one.  🤪🤣

Wait, you all told me lizard people aren't real!  What the fuck?

On 7/22/2023 at 3:44 PM, Satchel said:

Go ‘head, Paula!

 

Classic remix...

 

On 7/18/2023 at 9:01 AM, YGIFS said:

Very well, then I choose violence.  

Thought I attended law school, I never sat for the bar.  A more sinister craft beckoned.  So I honestly don't know and do not wish any liability to befall this site's ownership/administration.  

While I believe the Orange Godking would never deprive us of his glory by committing suicide...I have 95% confidence he would find great relish in watching his minions either kill and/or take their own lives in his name.  

While I do not want to get in the way of the upcoming and inevitable GOP-on-GOP violence, I am not longer as confident any of the other factions would even register enough anger as to cause MAGA nation to take up arms against them.  I am going to start a new thread but don't want to get the owners here in trouble.  I think we have spoken with the correct deep web people.  False flag messages from Trump to go out in some iteration of "don't let them make me stand trial" sometime in   Q2  next  year.  Send across the usual platforms appearing to be from him.  Or in the immediate aftermath of his defeat in the general election.  Or after he fails to be sworn into office for the 2nd time in 4 years.  He doesn't do what is expected which is rile them up to take back their country in either of those three scenarios.  Rather, he catches them off guard by being so low-energy and simply stating the only way forward from any of those three setbacks to redeem his vision and for people to prove their loyalty to him and the Flag is for them to take their own lives.  And perhaps even take with them a spouse or anyone else who shares their value set.  It's tricky not to entice anybody to take out innocents or children.  But there has got to be a way to get a few thousands of these folks to take their own lives that in their eyes will serve as a statement on how off-course our nation has veered and robbed us of being ruled eternally by the man sent by God himself.  If done right, he can appear to order at least a few  thousand people to take their own lives.  Jonestown in 50 state  technicolor.  People will die Ray, people will most definitely die.  For it's money he took, and dreams they've lost.

Thought I attended law school, I never sat for the bar.  A more sinister craft beckoned.  So I honestly don't know and do not wish any liability to befall this site's ownership/administration.  
While I believe the Orange Godking would never deprive us of his glory by committing suicide...I have 95% confidence he would find great relish in watching his minions either kill and/or take their own lives in his name.  
While I do not want to get in the way of the upcoming and inevitable GOP-on-GOP violence, I am not longer as confident any of the other factions would even register enough anger as to cause MAGA nation to take up arms against them.  I am going to start a new thread but don't want to get the owners here in trouble.  I think we have spoken with the correct deep web people.  False flag messages from Trump to go out in some iteration of "don't let them make me stand trial" sometime in   Q2  next  year.  Send across the usual platforms appearing to be from him.  Or in the immediate aftermath of his defeat in the general election.  Or after he fails to be sworn into office for the 2nd time in 4 years.  He doesn't do what is expected which is rile them up to take back their country in either of those three scenarios.  Rather, he catches them off guard by being so low-energy and simply stating the only way forward from any of those three setbacks to redeem his vision and for people to prove their loyalty to him and the Flag is for them to take their own lives.  And perhaps even take with them a spouse or anyone else who shares their value set.  It's tricky not to entice anybody to take out innocents or children.  But there has got to be a way to get a few thousands of these folks to take their own lives that in their eyes will serve as a statement on how off-course our nation has veered and robbed us of being ruled eternally by the man sent by God himself.  If done right, he can appear to order at least a few  thousand people to take their own lives.  Jonestown in 50 state  technicolor.  People will die Ray, people will most definitely die.  For it's money he took, and dreams they've lost.

giphy.gif
9 hours ago, Fudge Nuggets said:

Classic remix...

 

This the same woman, a woman of faith, that’s been dipping her greedy fingers in where they don’t belong… like Journey’s bank account? 

On 7/26/2023 at 7:26 PM, Biff Tannen said:

More believable than Christmas presents for Eric.

Or Tiffany, who didn't spend $200k on plastic surgery to look as fuckable as Ivanka, which Dotard surely resents.

15 hours ago, Fudge Nuggets said:

Classic remix...

 

So she has been seized by the holy spirit and is speaking in tongues, but the only available vowel is the short "a"?

3 minutes ago, longhornmatt said:

If you set aside losing the Presidency, the Senate, the House, the two impeachments, the first violent insurrection of the capitol since the War of 1812, the race riots, the worst economic calamity since the Great Depression, and the Biblical plague … 2020 was really a tremendous year for Republicans and the country as a whole.

 

lost georgia, pennsylvania, arizona 

22 minutes ago, longhornmatt said:

If you set aside losing the Presidency, the Senate, the House, the two impeachments, the first violent insurrection of the capitol since the War of 1812, the race riots, the worst economic calamity since the Great Depression, and the Biblical plague … 2020 was really a tremendous year for Republicans and the country as a whole.

17 minutes ago, tx 3 putt said:

lost georgia, pennsylvania, arizona 

And he likes the communists, don’t forget that - the Party of Reagan is now led by a ex-President openly praising communist nations and their leaders.  GOP already love the color red, they might as well go ahead and toss a yellow hammer and sickle in there.

9 minutes ago, atomheartbevo said:

And he likes the communists, don’t forget that - the Party of Reagan is now led by a ex-President openly praising communist nations and their leaders.  GOP already love the color red, they might as well go ahead and toss a yellow hammer and sickle in there.

image.png.f577f147bb81c403ab5ec8977578b365.png

No one is surprised.  DeSantis shot his wad and is going to be embarrassed badly. 

7 minutes ago, longhornmatt said:

The really insane thing is that even if he loses in 2024 and then goes to prison, they would probably still nominate him in 2028 assuming he’s not dead by then.   Of all the fucking people to form a cult around.  I don’t even think they know why they worship him at this point, other than they’ve convinced themselves he’s the guy that upsets libs the most (which, in fairness they are probably correct about that, but it’s in the same sense that cancer is what upsets doctors the most, Satan is what upsets actual Christians the most, and the Emperor is who triggers the Jedi the most).

So much this. I have this question often. THIS is the guy you have basically hitched your entire futures, both politically and literally, to?  THAT’S who you came up with?

  • Popular Post

When this is all over (when he's dead), we'll need to have a serious conversation as a country on how this happened. Like Germany post-WW2.

70+ million people in this country voted for someone who is uniquely unqualified for the job as President. Like, if you made up a list of all the qualities a President simply cannot have, he's got them all. They are his dominant traits.

 

Yeah, the postmortem autopsy on this whole deal is gonna take years, decades even to unpack.  And to make it doubly challenging is anytime there's an academic or journalist or scholarly conference/symposium to discuss it years from now...they'll have to worry about being firebombed by his still dedicated acolytes coming out of the jungle to continue the battle like Japanese island infantry in the 1960's South Pacific.  

If I live to be 1000 years old, none of this will ever make any goddamn sense.  It is the folly of human arrogance to consider one's self to be living in some truly remarkable time that all else of history has led to in fantastical aplomb.  But this was truly something else for the ages.  And even when we are done with the Trump Movement, the Trump Movement will not be done with us.   

  • Popular Post
2 hours ago, YGIFS said:

postmortem autopsy 

image.thumb.jpeg.cbc4226ca3e6180f9b58dfcea19d5b23.jpeg

You obviously don't know the same war criminals I do.  Several of them are Trump's short list for Surgeon General, should he be elected again.

3 hours ago, longhornmatt said:

assuming he’s not dead by then.   

Nights Talladega GIF

5 minutes ago, We’reTexas said:

 

shock.gif

image.png.08b611f665a8d387acc38448364c114e.png

 

Donde esta El Greggo Abbotto? No esta bien para las familias de Latin America.

I expect Abbott to announce that he will be putting mines in the Rio Grande and using a trebuchet send the ones that get through back to Mexico.

I just found out we had our own navy,

spacer.png

Just who the fuck do they think they will be engaging? Absolutely nuts.

  • Popular Post

 

Has this ever happened to you? The men are wearing your wife's underpants and you can't be a man anymore, and you've got to be a little sissy and cry about everything, and then the real men swapped out your toilet for a toilet just for farts.  Has this happened to you?

Itysl 101 GIF by Vulture.com

  • Popular Post
3 hours ago, Red Five said:

When this is all over (when he's dead), we'll need to have a serious conversation as a country on how this happened. Like Germany post-WW2.

70+ million people in this country voted for someone who is uniquely unqualified for the job as President. Like, if you made up a list of all the qualities a President simply cannot have, he's got them all. They are his dominant traits.

 

Serious conversations about unpleasant things in our past is not something Americans do.  For the really big things, we don't have serious conversations.  We come up with myths.  Like "slavery was contrary to America's founding principles and ideals" and "the Civil War was over states' rights."  Those can be unpacked by academics.  But in the popular imagination of America and a place and Americans as a people, those myths hold sway.

But for the lesser unpleasantries, they go to a Land of Forgetting.  Like, there was an entire anarchist terrorist campaign in the United States that killed a bunch of people between about 1890 and 1941.  But we learn nothing about that in school.  The closest we get is Sacco and Vanzetti, who were actually innocent.  But there were actual anarchists who actually killed people (including a president).

Trump is going to be consigned to the Land of Forgetting.  There will be no truth and reconciliation.  We don't do that.  It's not our bag, baby.

4 hours ago, longhornmatt said:

but it’s in the same sense that cancer is what upsets doctors the most, Satan is what upsets actual Christians the most, and the Emperor is who triggers the Jedi the most).

The word you are looking for is “sand”.  

Sand is what triggers the Jedi the most.

Configure browser push notifications

Chrome (Android)
  1. Tap the lock icon next to the address bar.
  2. Tap Permissions → Notifications.
  3. Adjust your preference.
Chrome (Desktop)
  1. Click the padlock icon in the address bar.
  2. Select Site settings.
  3. Find Notifications and adjust your preference.