Jump to content
View in the app

A better way to browse. Learn more.

Surly Horns

A full-screen app on your home screen with push notifications, badges and more.

To install this app on iOS and iPadOS
  1. Tap the Share icon in Safari
  2. Scroll the menu and tap Add to Home Screen.
  3. Tap Add in the top-right corner.
To install this app on Android
  1. Tap the 3-dot menu (⋮) in the top-right corner of the browser.
  2. Tap Add to Home screen or Install app.
  3. Confirm by tapping Install.
Football ... Basketball ... Baseball ... Other Sports ... Futbol ... 🤫995🤫 ... Gambling ... Movies & TV ... Music ... Hobbies ... Lulz ... Food & Travel ... Daily Texan ... Business & Markets ... Cloak Room ... Help ... For Sale ... Board Discussion ... Advertise... Tailgate Donations

Featured Replies

And no, not lower heaven. Greetings from sunny and warm Auckland! Back in March some contacts I had came through and the wife and I were able to leave the states for NZ permanently. Since I knew I wasn't going to post anymore I wanted to go out with a bang. I enjoyed reading all the craziness in that thread though.

It's been such a blast watching all that shit there in the USA from afar, and even though almost 4k of y'all are dying every day now keep ya chins up. I'm sure the vaccine will rollout to you all by Christmas 2021. 

Stay hard Surly and pray for Casey Thompson to be the next coming of football Jesus. Good luck to y'all

  • Popular Post

So you didn't kill your wife and you both traveled on a plane while she was covid positive?

Write us when you find the best fajitas, margaritas, brisket, and cheese enchiladas in all of New Zealand! I hear the competition is stiff. Just keep after it.

Signed,

A former expat who literally wept with gratitude while eating shitty fajitas at the Tel Aviv Hard Rock Cafe

1 hour ago, Junior Miller said:

It's been such a blast watching all that shit there in the USA from afar, and even though almost 4k of y'all are dying every day now keep ya chins up. 

mister rogers middle finger GIF

  • Popular Post
On 4/7/2020 at 3:24 PM, Junior Miller said:

I think my wife may have fucked us. I requested one fucking thing: don't go to stores and don't go see friends. That's it. Let me go to the stores. Let me take the risk because I can ramp up and be super OCD about this. 

Well she disobeyed and went to see two friends at their houses over the last 2 weeks and went to Walmart twice. Now she's had two days of feeling cold, sore throat, and overall feeling fatigued and muscle aches. 

I'm scared shitless. Don't feel anything different yet but seriously considering going today to buy a pistol and ammo so if this thing gets really bad for me I can kill myself before the worst symptoms of the pneumonia distress start. 

If I'm fortunate and don't get sick very badly I'm leaving her as soon as possible and filing for divorce. She showed she can't even put my or her own health and life ahead of her selfish desires to see her friends. That's unforgivable. 

 

On 4/7/2020 at 3:34 PM, Junior Miller said:

I meant if it gets so bad that I start having severe respiratory distress and will probably die anyway. Not if I just feel bad. I have to start not being able to breathe bad because my lungs are filling with fluid, but if that were to happen I'd rather die by bullet than drowning on my own blood and fluids

And if it gets that bad and it's her selfish stupidity that caused me to die I might put one in her head too. Words can't describe how badly I hate this bitch now for doing this. 

 

On 4/7/2020 at 3:43 PM, BayouBill said:

You sound super stable

Quoting his posts to save others time. Also the best reply. 

Looking back, the freak out over going to Walmart twice and seeing 2 friends is fucking hilarious. That post had like 10 pos rep. I guess some people were cautious enough back then for that to be somewhat reasonable grounds for divorcing his wife? Without any additional context?

Basically OP is a loser, should have started this thread in CR, and none one gives a fuck what country he's "living" in. 

I'm owed fucks for how much given.

2 hours ago, Junior Miller said:

Since I knew I wasn't going to post anymore I wanted to go out with a bang.

You should have stuck to that commitment dickface. Maybe you'll catch AIDS

42 minutes ago, MaybeACoordinator said:

I think we are all in agreement that we are relieved you didn't murder your wife. 

l9lrMo.gif

2 hours ago, MaybeACoordinator said:

Write us when you find the best fajitas, margaritas, brisket, and cheese enchiladas in all of New Zealand! I hear the competition is stiff. Just keep after it.

You know what they say about New Zealand though....

hour.jpg

 

Cool.  When you return visit College Station and share stories about NZ poon...you sheep fucker.

9 hours ago, MaybeACoordinator said:

A former expat who literally wept with gratitude while eating shitty fajitas at the Tel Aviv Hard Rock Cafe

Shitty fajitas? In France we would have danced barefoot on jagged rocks for even a shitty fajita. They had "Mexican" restaurants but near as I could puzzle out, they were run by Indians (b/c spicy is spicy, right?) who had somebody cooking a half-slap version of Cuban food.

I mean, you can find French food in Mexico. Froggy ain't even tryin.

1 hour ago, immamac said:

I didn't realize surlyhorns was blocked in new zealand 

We don't fit in in plague-free zones.

10 hours ago, MaybeACoordinator said:

Write us when you find the best fajitas, margaritas, brisket, and cheese enchiladas in all of New Zealand! I hear the competition is stiff. Just keep after it.

Signed,

A former expat who literally wept with gratitude while eating shitty fajitas at the Tel Aviv Hard Rock Cafe

They also put beets on their hamburgers.  🤮

Beautiful country though.

Ya know, there are probably plenty of sheep to fuck here in the states. You didn't need to go all the way to NZ.

8 hours ago, MaybeACoordinator said:

I think we are all in agreement that we are relieved you didn't murder your wife. 

I’m not convinced. Why do you think he fled the United States?

40 minutes ago, RDCanecutter said:

Shitty fajitas? In France we would have danced barefoot on jagged rocks for even a shitty fajita. They had "Mexican" restaurants but near as I could puzzle out, they were run by Indians (b/c spicy is spicy, right?) who had somebody cooking a half-slap version of Cuban food.

I mean, you can find French food in Mexico. Froggy ain't even tryin.

Well, why in the hell don't we find the Surly 1%ers, pitch them the investment idea and open a restaurant in Paris called, "Surly's Tex-Mex With An Attitude." Throw down some authentic Tex-Mex, killer margaritas, franchise the hell out of it then in 3 - 5 years sell it off for a bundle!

Why not? Isn't it a great time to open new restaurants?

Definitely buried his wife and kids and ran off with his hot "life coach" boyfriend. #cultlife

Intelligence level of both places went up when you left.  Take us off the Christmas card list.

On 1/1/2021 at 6:19 PM, Lidig8r said:

Well, why in the hell don't we find the Surly 1%ers, pitch them the investment idea and open a restaurant in Paris called, "Surly's Tex-Mex With An Attitude." Throw down some authentic Tex-Mex, killer margaritas, franchise the hell out of it then in 3 - 5 years sell it off for a bundle!

Why not? Isn't it a great time to open new restaurants?

https://goo.gl/maps/Fg7SympC1uMde4nC7

 

On 1/1/2021 at 2:09 AM, MaybeACoordinator said:

I think we are all in agreement that we are relieved you didn't murder your wife. 

Yeah but his wife probably wishes he'd followed through.

Going to need proof of life on the wife 

Surly is not your blog.  You are one of the shittiest posters on this site and should go back into hiding you ignorant cunt. 

On 1/1/2021 at 2:09 AM, MaybeACoordinator said:

I think we are all in agreement that we are relieved you didn't murder your wife. 

 

On 1/1/2021 at 11:02 AM, South Austin said:

I’m not convinced. Why do you think he fled the United States?

I'm pretty sure we can make a fairly convincing case that he just graduated to kidnapping and his wife is currently bound in a dark cellar with duct tape while he takes out his Covid rage on her daily with a sock full of quarters and his tiny, limp Jimbo Fisher-esque dick. 

52 minutes ago, SydneyCarton said:

 

I'm pretty sure we can make a fairly convincing case that he just graduated to kidnapping and his wife is currently bound in a dark cellar with duct tape while he takes out his Covid rage on her daily with a sock full of quarters and his tiny, limp Jimbo Fisher-esque dick. 

Very detailed description. You must have video.

3 minutes ago, South Austin said:

Very detailed description. You must have video.

Indeed. From his wife. I miss her. 

On 1/1/2021 at 10:43 AM, MNLonghornFUKM said:

Damn I forgot about that. Psycho.

Holy shit so did I. Bye I guess

7 minutes ago, DefinitelyNotHollywoodColt said:

link to the backstory on this clown and his wife?

 

This appears to be your run of the mill crazy person posting nonsense. I miss the good old days when the crazies that posted here were responsible for city wide manhunts looking for a mysterious rock thrower while fending off the teens or driving their custom Miata anti-tank high frequency recording mobile over the border 20 times a day so they can scream AM I BEING DETAINED to the Arby’s drive thru guy and then sues George Washington for violations of the 34th amendment and ends up with a published 5th Circuit opinion. 

  • 2 weeks later...
On 1/4/2021 at 9:24 PM, Zepol87 said:

God damn numbers was crazy

Numbers was just a dick. A small, shriveled up, herpes infested dick. 

On 1/4/2021 at 7:23 PM, Hank Scorpio said:

This appears to be your run of the mill crazy person posting nonsense. I miss the good old days when the crazies that posted here were responsible for city wide manhunts looking for a mysterious rock thrower while fending off the teens or driving their custom Miata anti-tank high frequency recording mobile over the border 20 times a day so they can scream AM I BEING DETAINED to the Arby’s drive thru guy and then sues George Washington for violations of the 34th amendment and ends up with a published 5th Circuit opinion. 

Mitsubishi, not a Miata.  I'm probably just as crazy for remembering that and posting it.

No doubt OP beats his wife and probably sucks pee pee with his butt hole now 

 

nttawt 

On 1/4/2021 at 8:58 AM, SydneyCarton said:

 

I'm pretty sure we can make a fairly convincing case that he just graduated to kidnapping and his wife is currently bound in a dark cellar with duct tape while he takes out his Covid rage on her daily with a sock full of quarters and his tiny, limp Jimbo Fisher-esque dick. 

So, Thursday at most of our houses? 

16 hours ago, Wulaw Horn said:

So, Thursday at most of our houses? 

I use a sock full of catnip.

sends a symbolic message.

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...
Football ... Basketball ... Baseball ... Other Sports ... Futbol ... 🤫995🤫 ... Gambling ... Movies & TV ... Music ... Hobbies ... Lulz ... Food & Travel ... Daily Texan ... Business & Markets ... Cloak Room ... Help ... For Sale ... Board Discussion ... Advertise... Tailgate Donations

Configure browser push notifications

Chrome (Android)
  1. Tap the lock icon next to the address bar.
  2. Tap Permissions → Notifications.
  3. Adjust your preference.
Chrome (Desktop)
  1. Click the padlock icon in the address bar.
  2. Select Site settings.
  3. Find Notifications and adjust your preference.