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#5501

Fast food napkins are designed to  have a short side that  should face the slot for easy retrieval for a reason.

Edited by Nolacycling

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  • Scheiss Meister
    Scheiss Meister

    The day I retired I set an auto reply that said something like "As of EOB today I will be retired.  If you expect me to reply to an email after 10:00 am today, you will be disappointed."  At the 3:00

  • Ghost of NMAS
    Ghost of NMAS

    I hate the people that ignore it when they have the right of way and try to wave me through first, it just fucks up the system and delays everyone

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#5504
3 hours ago, NorthLoop said:

Resealable bags that will not seal no matter what you do

My bag of seeds at practice last night wouldn't seal.  Rage.

 

#5505
Not sure if already posted.  But, foreign call centers for service.  I mean, almost immediately surly. f you AT&T/Directv.


The world’s largest telecommunication company with hundreds of billions in equity has had one of the shittest websites for years.
#5507
4 hours ago, Walden Ponderer said:

Corollary: Resealable bags that won't open initially without destroying the resealing mechanism.

Yep - takes the jaws of life to open them, and when you finally do you've exploded the entire top half of the bag. 

#5508
2 hours ago, VolenteHawk said:

My bag of seeds at practice last night wouldn't seal.  Rage.

 

Yer mom unsealed my bag of seed last night. It was not practice.

#5510
Casual restaurants that have tiny ass water cups, like the size of the little Dixie cup ones that you used to see in people’s bathrooms in the 80s.  Thanks, I really enjoy getting up to refill this 3 ounce cup 6 times during the course of my meal. 
Fucking this. Put a little ice in it and you get about 3 ounces of water.
#5512
Not sure if already posted.  But, foreign call centers for service.  I mean, almost immediately surly. f you AT&T/Directv.
Yet they use American names when they introduce themselves lol. I'm pretty sure your name isn't Dave and you aren't from whatever random state you tell me you're from.
  • Author
#5513
6 hours ago, Cheeseweasel said:

I know you name isn't Dave, bro. Don't think you're fooling anyone.

she sounds hideous

#5514
22 minutes ago, Vic Mackey said:
6 hours ago, Atxracer said:
Not sure if already posted.  But, foreign call centers for service.  I mean, almost immediately surly. f you AT&T/Directv.

Yet they use American names when they introduce themselves lol. I'm pretty sure your name isn't Dave and you aren't from whatever random state you tell me you're from.

They don't just give them American sounding names. They coach them to speak English with an American accent. Not particularly successfully from what I've heard but the effort to deceive is pretty thorough. 

#5515

When the cold water is on the left and hot water is on the right.  It seems to be epidemic when I go to hotels or AirBnB's.

#5516
On 3/29/2019 at 5:52 PM, WhatTheBuck said:

They don't just give them American sounding names. They coach them to speak English with an American accent. Not particularly successfully from what I've heard but the effort to deceive is pretty thorough. 

I, too, like (Local) Sports Team.

#5517
50 minutes ago, Cheeseweasel said:

I, too, like (Local) Sports Team.

I said I liked Formula 1 last time, and the guy started running off years of driver statistics.

#5518
20 minutes ago, HornsOverIthaca said:

I said I liked Formula 1 last time, and the guy started running off years of driver statistics.

I, too, am a huge Cricket fan. (EXPLODES)

#5519

Pull apart plastic tabs to open food packages that have such a tiny split in the opening that a knife or other item is required to get the package open. Same with those giant ketchup packets that have the peel off top and tab yet have such a tiny split that a pixie would be required to pull the tab back. 

Edited by mdmost

#5521
Just now, Continental Op said:

The tired ass April Fools bullshit from every company in the world who feels like they have to show the world how clever they are. 

But the meatless Big Mac idea is huuuuullllarious!!! 

#5523
42 minutes ago, 'stache said:

April Fools Day in the internet age is stupid as fuck. 

Thank you. I basically can't go on reddit the entire day because it's such a shit-post fest with everyone trying to one-up each other with the "funniest" GOTCHA! posts. 

  • Author
#5524

my uncanny ability to get my meal onto a plate and me plopped down in front of the TV just as they cut to commercial.  or worse, halftime.

#5525
3 minutes ago, elfenix said:

my uncanny ability to get my meal onto a plate and me plopped down in front of the TV just as they cut to commercial.  or worse, halftime.

DVR is your friend

#5526
12 minutes ago, elfenix said:

my uncanny ability to get my meal onto a plate and me plopped down in front of the TV just as they cut to commercial.  or worse, halftime.

Good now you can focus on getting all the food in your mouth, and not all over the floor and coffee table....

#5527
42 minutes ago, ztejas said:

Thank you. I basically can't go on reddit the entire day because it's such a shit-post fest with everyone trying to one-up each other with the "funniest" GOTCHA! posts. 

it makes me want to kill myself, so I'm going to do that right now

#5528
When your homeowner's insurance company, who you've only been with for 1 year, hits you with a 32% year over year increase forcing you to shop for new insurance again. Motherfuckers, I'd like to be able to go a couple of years before your incessant rate creep forces me to shop around again. What are you thinking?


Do you even teaser rate bro?
#5529
Peeling a boiled egg and the shell sticks to and pulls off the white. I get stabby.


Boil water first
Put eggs in water
Remove after 12 minutes
Put eggs in ice water bath to cool
???
Profit
#5533

Trivial thing that annoys me: when a TV series can't just have a gay character but has to have a GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY character. E.g., the lesbian photographer in Man In The High Castle, e.g., "Hi, I'm the photographer, let me just get my camera OH MY GOD WHO IS THAT ATTRACTIVE WOMAN I'D LIKE TO HAVE SEXUAL INTERCOURSE WITH HER BECAUSE I'M A BIG OL LESBIAN!"

Very subtle. Very true to the story environment, too-- the American Nazi Reich is anti-homosexual but this lesbian photographer can't get a sentence out of her mouth before she turns into a leering construction worker upon seeing a mildly attractive woman. Kind of undermines the dramatic tension of A Forbidden Love Affair when one of the character acts like Rodney Dangerfield looking at Juliette Lewis in Natural Born Killers. 

#5534
4 minutes ago, SwanderedTalent said:

 OH MY GOD WHO IS THAT ATTRACTIVE WOMAN I'D LIKE TO HAVE SEXUAL INTERCOURSE WITH HER BECAUSE I'M A BIG OLE LESBIAN 

Go on...

  • Author
#5535

you mean the lebensborn propagandist chick? She's bi and aggressively promiscuous. Would like to see a lot more of her and the gossip columnist

#5536

Well it was central to that part of the storyline. I guess you'd prefer if she just said "by the way I'm bi" and then it never comes up again? Then we would have missed out on the sweet make out scene.

Edited by 'stache

#5539
4 hours ago, ztejas said:

Thank you. I basically can't go on reddit the entire day because it's such a shit-post fest with everyone trying to one-up each other with the "funniest" GOTCHA! posts. 

Ugh, the OSU version this year is a picture of Mike Gundy photoshopped to look like he died his mullet blonde. It's actually a decent photoshop, but god damnit, so fucking obvious knowing  today is April 1. And how is that funny exactly?

Edited by 'stache

#5540
1 hour ago, 'stache said:

Well it was central to that part of the storyline. I guess you'd prefer if she just said "by the way I'm bi" and then it never comes up again?

no, dumbass

#5541
1 hour ago, Player said:

People who complain about hot lesbians in movies. 

I think maybe that was aimed at me, which means you didn't understand the point. I don't think I complained that there were lesbians, or that they were hot. 

Edited by SwanderedTalent

#5542

People who drone on and on about some inane point, and then feign indignation when others don’t express admiration for what amounts to them sniffing their own farts.

#5543
42 minutes ago, Player said:

People who drone on and on about some inane point, and then feign indignation when others don’t express admiration for what amounts to them sniffing their own farts.

 

#5545
On 3/22/2019 at 5:05 PM, Paper_jam said:

One thing that makes me surly is public bathroom stalls (and sink areas) that don't have anyplace to put your shit. If I designed any bathroom, each stall would have a coathook and a fold-down shelf to put your briefcase or other objects on. And there would be shelves or storage options near the sink area. So you don't have to just dump your stuff all over the piss-soaked floor, or put clean items down on the wet sink counter. Why doesn't anyone think of these little details? I'm not that smart so the lack of these extremely basic amenities must be intentional.

 

 

 

 

I'd settle for them remembering to put coat hooks on the doors of the stall.  Seems like half the restaurants I eat at think not having them is trendy.

 

Also guys who think walking around in public with a half smoked cigarette stuck behind their ear makes them look like bad asses.  No thesaurus has ever listed bad ass as a synonym for scumbucket.

#5546
On 3/17/2019 at 9:38 AM, HRSchenker said:

I can't stand going to fast food restaurants or really any kind of drive thru where you have to talk into a speaker for this one trivial reason

Me: I'll have a whataburger with cheese, small fries, and that's it.

Them: Okay anything else?

Me: That's it.

I told you that I don't want anything else so why are you asking me? I could understand if they were trying to upsell me another menu item but that never happens.

I'll call B.S. on this for one reason only.  I don't think I've been to a drive thru at a fast food restaurant anywhere in at least the last two years where they didn't try to upsell a cookie to my order.

  • Author
#5547
2 minutes ago, EMAWesome said:

I'll call B.S. on this for one reason only.  I don't think I've been to a drive thru at a fast food restaurant anywhere in at least the last two years where they didn't try to upsell a cookie to my order.

get ready for more of that with mcdonalds' AI menu system

#5548
On 3/18/2019 at 8:18 AM, VolenteHawk said:

As baseball season approaches, I've got a new one.  I've been a (25-ish game mini pack) season ticket holder for the Express for several years now.  My new season ticket rep interacted with me by email and added that one, a different email than is associated with my account, to their announcement system.  All my personal email lands in one spot, so I now get two back to back copies of everything promotional related to the Express or Dell Diamond

It's going to slowly drive me insane.

 

I guess this speaks to my online habits but I read that last part as everything promotional related to the Express or Debi Diamond.

#5549
On 3/13/2019 at 7:49 AM, SwanderedTalent said:

any singer who pronounces the "er" sound as "oi", e.g., James Taylor on Steamroller Blues ("choinin' oin' of boinin' funk")

I think there's a every CCR song where John Fogerty does it too

Fixed that for you (even though I like the way Fogerty sings)

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