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  • Scheiss Meister
    Scheiss Meister

    The day I retired I set an auto reply that said something like "As of EOB today I will be retired.  If you expect me to reply to an email after 10:00 am today, you will be disappointed."  At the 3:00

  • Ghost of NMAS
    Ghost of NMAS

    I hate the people that ignore it when they have the right of way and try to wave me through first, it just fucks up the system and delays everyone

Posted Images

#6505
32 minutes ago, ernest_t_bass said:

I'm a stairs person, but what if the stairs aren't "right there"?

Our old office tower's stairs only had specific floors you could re-enter the building from (you could exit from any floor, but not enter any floor).  We had offices on 2 different floors (20/18) and it was a real PITA to wait for an elevator in a 75 story building to go down 2 floors but neither floor was a re-entry floor. 

Our new building has a concourse level and a plaza level.  The elevator bank has 4 elevators, 3 of which only go down to P and one that goes down to C. You can take an escalator to get from P to C.  The amount of people I see get to P from one of the non-C elevators and then WAIT FOR THE C ELEVATOR.... Lord we need a plague. 

#6506
7 hours ago, RollLeft said:

People who get on the elevator and then push one floor above or below their current floor.  Lazy bastards.

I've been in buildings where the doors would lock you into the fire stair and you'd have to walk all the way to the ground floor.

#6507

why do you give a fuck what someone else is doing? Keep those fat fucks out of my way. I use the stairs b/c fuck waiting for the elevator. I don't want to wait for huffy mcgee to lug his meatbag up 40 stairs.

#6508
16 hours ago, 52-80 said:

This is universal.  Signage will indicate preference for preggos, old, disabled, babbies.

 

Bitches aren't entitled to shit and I ain't white knighting random hos on a commuter train, fuck that.

+rep for use of the word babbies.  It needs to come back.  It’s been unfairly relegated to a small town in England.

#6509

I get really surly when people question why I give a fuck about what people do....  Why do they give a fuck about what I give a fuck about ?

#6510
why do you give a fuck what someone else is doing? Keep those fat fucks out of my way. I use the stairs b/c fuck waiting for the elevator. I don't want to wait for huffy mcgee to lug his meatbag up 40 stairs.
Because I work on the 12th floor and taking the stairs isn't a realistic option for me. I took them every day when I worked on the 5th floor. I also take them to and from my car on the 5th level of the garage.
#6511
18 minutes ago, Okie State said:
28 minutes ago, Llogg said:
why do you give a fuck what someone else is doing? Keep those fat fucks out of my way. I use the stairs b/c fuck waiting for the elevator. I don't want to wait for huffy mcgee to lug his meatbag up 40 stairs.

Because I work on the 12th floor and taking the stairs isn't a realistic option for me. I took them every day when I worked on the 5th floor. I also take them to and from my car on the 5th level of the garage.

Objection, relevance.

#6512
5 hours ago, Js1 said:

Our old office tower's stairs only had specific floors you could re-enter the building from (you could exit from any floor, but not enter any floor).  We had offices on 2 different floors (20/18) and it was a real PITA to wait for an elevator in a 75 story building to go down 2 floors but neither floor was a re-entry floor. 

Our new building has a concourse level and a plaza level.  The elevator bank has 4 elevators, 3 of which only go down to P and one that goes down to C. You can take an escalator to get from P to C.  The amount of people I see get to P from one of the non-C elevators and then WAIT FOR THE C ELEVATOR.... Lord we need a plague. 

giphy.gif

#6513
Objection, relevance.
My point is I want those assholes off of the elevator that I'm forced to use. My opinion would change if I move back to a lower floor.
#6515
15 minutes ago, gecko said:

The motion detecting faucets at the airport that seem to never work

You're invisible to radar, too?  

#6516
1 hour ago, gecko said:

The motion detecting faucets at the airport that seem to never work

Do you also have issues with automatic doors? 

Maybe you don’t have a soul 

#6517
2 hours ago, gecko said:

The motion detecting faucets at the airport that seem to never work

They never work when your hands are right under them, but they spout out water when you walk by them, lol

#6518
2 hours ago, Js1 said:

Do you also have issues with automatic doors? 

Maybe you don’t have a soul 

Are you a vampire?

 

If you're a vampire you have to tell us

#6519

Whats the TV/cable systems that takes like 3-5 seconds to change the fucking channel.  Infuriating. 

Often it's with TVs in hotels.  Where they also flash to some shitass customized hotel hub when you turn it on. 

I'm not interested in the weather or fucking dining menu for tonight -- I just want to watch the fucking TV

#6523
7 minutes ago, Cheeseweasel said:

It's got an LSU sticker on the back  a GM/Chevy. Shocked they have any working lights.

Edited because most Tahoes/Yukons around those model years rarely had all lights working.

#6524
Do you wipe down the remote before using? Hear people do strange things with hotel remotes. 

 

Don’t judge me for taking the sharpie challenge to the next level, bro.

#6525
2 hours ago, Underdog said:

Do you wipe down the remote before using? Hear people do strange things with hotel remotes. 

 

1 hour ago, luke duke said:

 

Don’t judge me for taking the sharpie challenge to the next level, bro.

world of warcraft addiction GIF

#6526
3 hours ago, Underdog said:

Do you wipe down the remote before using? Hear people do strange things with hotel remotes. 

You have to wipe down the remote in a hotel room before touching it.  Takes 4 seconds.  Also, the desk in hotel rooms---wipe down the area in front of the chair, the armrests, and don't use the washcloths.  Ever.  Just common sense.  

  • Author
#6528
23 minutes ago, Lobo said:

You have to wipe down the remote in a hotel room before touching it.  Takes 4 seconds.  Also, the desk in hotel rooms---wipe down the area in front of the chair, the armrests, and don't use the washcloths.  Ever.  Just common sense.  

what am i supposed to jizz into, then?

#6529
1 minute ago, elfenix said:

what am i supposed to jizz into, then?

Huh? It's a hotel room man. Just cum wherever. The floor, the lampshade, on the housekeeper, it's all fair game. 

#6530
2 minutes ago, elfenix said:

what am i supposed to jizz into, then?

Fair point, I meant don't use the washcloths for their original purpose.  I typically opt for tissues, but many times it's been the washcloths.  If you're a valued member of the Starwood or Hyatt chains, we know each other biblically.  

#6531
4 hours ago, Underdog said:

Do you wipe down the remote before using? Hear people do strange things with hotel remotes. 

Smartphone w/ IR blaster

#6534

Dipshits that are too stupid to understand the concept of the magnet in the street at light signal controlled intersections and don’t actually stop over it causing them and everyone behind them to sit through 5 light cycles.  

#6535

why would you not use a hotel washcloth?

 

Is the assumption that they do not actually get replaced every day?

#6536

When you merge onto a highway and jackass in the far right lane speeds up to get in front of you, and when you slow down to get in behind them they move into the middle lane which was OPEN THE ENTIRE FUCKING TIME

#6537

when a show is filming a scene in an automobile and they are flipping back and forth from the front seat to the back seat, they typically take out the headrests. obviously they are doing this to remove any obstructions in the shot, but i'll be damned if it doesn't annoy me for some unknown reason. 

#6539

When a server at a restaurant greets you with, "Have you dined with us before/Have you been here before?"  Unless it's at El Bulli and we're taking a culinary tour for the ages, it doesn't fucking matter if I've been to your place 100 times or never. 

Will my answer somehow affect your service or the way they prepare the food?  "Oh, it's their first time here?  Okay team...let's cook the chicken all the way through then." 

Yeah, I get it.  I order food, they cook it, you bring it out to me, I eat it, I pay you, I leave.  

It's verbal flair 

#6541

if you email a picture from your iPhone, you have four options: small, medium, large, and normal. Small is 34 KB, medium is 100 KB, large is 1 MB, actual size is 2.3 MB. Medium doesn't really seem very medium to me on that spectrum. 

#6542
if you email a picture from your iPhone, you have four options: small, medium, large, and normal. Small is 34 KB, medium is 100 KB, large is 1 MB, actual size is 2.3 MB. Medium doesn't really seem very medium to me on that spectrum. 


You don’t seem to mind the non-linear scale when you tell women about your medium-sized cock.
#6543
30 minutes ago, luke duke said:

 


You don’t seem to mind the non-linear scale when you tell women about your medium-sized cock.

 

"Oh, yeah, baby, you like that? You like getting it good and hard? I mean getting it decent and medium?"

#6544
3 hours ago, SwanderedTalent said:

if you email a picture from your iPhone, you have four options: small, medium, large, and normal. Small is 34 KB, medium is 100 KB, large is 1 MB, actual size is 2.3 MB. Medium doesn't really seem very medium to me on that spectrum. 

convert those over to number of pixels height and weight and get back to us on whether it seems medium or not

#6545
3 hours ago, SwanderedTalent said:

"Oh, yeah, baby, you like that? You like getting it good and hard? I mean getting it decent and medium?"

Are you recording me?

#6546
6 hours ago, SwanderedTalent said:

if you email a picture from your iPhone, you have four options: small, medium, large, and normal. Small is 34 KB, medium is 100 KB, large is 1 MB, actual size is 2.3 MB. Medium doesn't really seem very medium to me on that spectrum. 

Same spectrum as when the smallest pizza/beverage is the "medium".

  • Author
#6548
Same spectrum as when the smallest pizza/beverage is the "medium".
14" pizzas being sold as "large". 14" is a goddamn medium pizza.
#6550

The uncanny ability for females to take innocuous, everyday situation and turn it into oh my god that is hilarious. That is so hilarious. No. Shut up. He did not. You're kidding. 

55bb7874af3ed363371de561410a34a5

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