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#13051
5 minutes ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

I used to operate my company under the name XXXXX  XXXXXX Design.  I used to get spam calls all the time asking for Mr. Design.

Tell them you are "Dr. Design, thank you very much".

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  • Scheiss Meister
    Scheiss Meister

    The day I retired I set an auto reply that said something like "As of EOB today I will be retired.  If you expect me to reply to an email after 10:00 am today, you will be disappointed."  At the 3:00

  • Ghost of NMAS
    Ghost of NMAS

    I hate the people that ignore it when they have the right of way and try to wave me through first, it just fucks up the system and delays everyone

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#13052

In these prepackaged utensil, the paper napkins are made of spider silk because they don't absorb any liquids, and will tear apart with one wipe.

Choice Medium Weight Black Wrapped Plastic Cutlery Set with Napkin and Salt  and Pepper Packets - 250/Case

#13054
5 hours ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

I used to operate my company under the name XXXXX  XXXXXX Design.  I used to get spam calls all the time asking for Mr. Design.

Design of Neighborhood  

#13055

Haven't been in a liquor store in a while, but what in god's name happened to whiskey?  Fucking gimmicky, flavored shit is everywhere; peach, vanilla, honey, etc. That might be tolerable for something like a schnapps or a wine cooler, but whiskey? What reputable distiller of spirits would even entertain such an idea? The damage to your brand's reputation isn't worth whatever additional revenue it may bring in. Whiskey is supposed to taste like gasoline and charred wood, stop trying to fancy it up.

 

#13056
16 hours ago, High Plains Drifter said:

 

when you go to a meeting, (yes, we are having in person meetings now), and the person running the show delays the start past the scheduled start time "to give everybody a few minutes to get here".

 

 

I'm going to add:

 

...and then the meeting goes past the time its supposed to end.

 

(yes, I'm in a got damned meeting that is supposed to end in 5 minutes and we haven't covered half the agenda yet. And yes, we started late because assholes were late.)

 

 

 

#13058
10 hours ago, slorch said:

Brother goes by his middle name, to the point that many even in the family forget it's his middle name.  It does come in handy when someone calls and asks for dude by his first name...he knows instantly that they don't know who the hell they're speaking with.

My uncle went by Jim.  His name was Albert Owen (mylastname).

 I think I was in my 30s before I found out his real name since NO ONE ever called anything but Jim.

Turns out that his father, during WWI, was in the Army and someone in his outfit said he didn't look like an Albert, he looked like a Jim and it stuck.  So, when my uncle was born (he was the oldest), he got named after my grandpa and apparently the nickname came with it...

#13059
22 hours ago, SHOOTER12 said:

Fuck you.

I just HAD to be named after my dad, making me a "Jr".  I don't understand, he hated the name too, but gave it to me. 

You were both named Sue? 

#13060
22 hours ago, SHOOTER12 said:

Side note: almost wound up named after my grandfather and dad, would have been William Wallace.

You aren't William Wallace?

#13061
12 hours ago, ztejas said:

You aren't William Wallace?

aye don't let the thunderbolts from me arse fool ya ...

Edited by SHOOTER12

#13062
2 hours ago, Paper_jam said:

Haven't been in a liquor store in a while, but what in god's name happened to whiskey?  Fucking gimmicky, flavored shit is everywhere; peach, vanilla, honey, etc. That might be tolerable for something like a schnapps or a wine cooler, but whiskey? What reputable distiller of spirits would even entertain such an idea? The damage to your brand's reputation isn't worth whatever additional revenue it may bring in. Whiskey is supposed to taste like gasoline and charred wood, stop trying to fancy it up.

 

@Angry Gorilla and Peanut Butter whiskey are the reason that flavored whiskey exists. Start at the post below, and read the next few pages. @Angry Gorilla gives us a blow-by-blow as he knocks back a bottle. It’s a thing of beauty. 

@Angry Gorilla, we really need a reprise.  I suggest the following for Act II of your whiskey tasting notes.  https://www.birddogwhiskey.com/whiskey/strawberrywhiskey

 

 

#13064
3 minutes ago, Angry Gorilla said:

I told myself never again. But then I told myself I’m not a fucking quitter. 

do-it-do-it-now.gif
 

C’mon. Things have slowed down for the holidays, it’s the off-season, Ewers is in the bag. We need that reprise.  I’m sure a number of us would find the effort. 

#13065
10 hours ago, Lobo said:

 

Of course, the downside is I give it at a food counter for some to-go, I give 'em the name for the order, and then I get some $9/hour barely literate millennial who invariably asks, "Is that your real name?" 

 

TIL Lobo's name is Michael Bolton.

#13066
2 hours ago, ztejas said:

You aren't William Wallace?

No.  He's Chris Wallace.

Just quit his job and probably moving to CNN.

We should all wish him well.

#13068

I hate the proliferation of EDGE to describe a 4-3 DE/3-4 OLB type.

I don’t mind the term itself, but it annoys me that it’s all caps when all other positions are abbreviated with one or two letters. It should be Edge, abbreviated with just an E. The only potential confusion would be with DE, but it effectively replaces that anyway.

We don’t say a guy plays CENTER or SAFETY. It makes no sense.

  • Author
#13069

when my phone gets one notification so then checks for any others it missed and spends 20 seconds dinging and vibrating as all of them come in

#13070

Speaking of phones.  WTF with gmail on my laptop?  Every time I log in now, the 2-step verification requires that I open my gmail app on my phone and click "Yes" to the other device request (my laptop) to access my email on my laptop which is where I like to do it.  I've clicked "Don't ask me this again" a dozen times this week to no avail.  What the cuss Doug? 

#13071
15 minutes ago, Lobo said:

Speaking of phones.  WTF with gmail on my laptop?  Every time I log in now, the 2-step verification requires that I open my gmail app on my phone and click "Yes" to the other device request (my laptop) to access my email on my laptop which is where I like to do it.  I've clicked "Don't ask me this again" a dozen times this week to no avail.  What the cuss Doug? 

You're obviously a shady, and suspect person.

#13072

Well obviously.  But I don't have always have my phone right next to my laptop.  I guess google has not enjoyed my recent searches as much as I have.  

#13073
21 minutes ago, Lobo said:

Speaking of phones.  WTF with gmail on my laptop?  Every time I log in now, the 2-step verification requires that I open my gmail app on my phone and click "Yes" to the other device request (my laptop) to access my email on my laptop which is where I like to do it.  I've clicked "Don't ask me this again" a dozen times this week to no avail.  What the cuss Doug? 

2FA can be turned off, boomer. 😄

 

#13074

I click the fucking "Don't ask me this again" and the switch in system preferences every damn day.  But it still comes back on to ask me.  

And I'm not a boomer, I'm a late-Gen X'er.  My taste in funny movies seems to be stuck in the 1980's...along with my computer skills. 

Fuck it, I'm going back to using Bank Street Writer.  

#13077

At Specs in Arbor Walk, there are a couple of parking spots reserved for “super heroes” aka veterans.

Putting any group of people on a pedestal bugs the fuck out of me. Leave the close spots for the handicapped.

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#13078
57 minutes ago, CooterBrown said:

At Specs in Arbor Walk, there are a couple of parking spots reserved for “super heroes” aka veterans.

Putting any group of people on a pedestal bugs the fuck out of me. Leave the close spots for the handicapped.

Agreed. It seems particularly cruel to put a handicapped person on a pedestal.

#13079

Two of the kids are in soccer. At the games it’s teams on one sideline and parents/fans on the other. It drives me absolutely insane when fans don’t sit across from the team they’re there to cheer on.

#13080
14 hours ago, CooterBrown said:

At Specs in Arbor Walk, there are a couple of parking spots reserved for “super heroes”

I’m their top customer and I deserve a reserved parking spot. Got dammit. 

#13081
14 hours ago, Fudbelty said:

Two of the kids are in soccer. At the games it’s teams on one sideline and parents/fans on the other. It drives me absolutely insane when fans don’t sit across from the team they’re there to cheer on.

Shouldn’t you want to sit on the same side as your team? And if not, isn’t the setup you described ideal for you?

#13082
11 hours ago, WhatTheBuck said:

Shouldn’t you want to sit on the same side as your team? And if not, isn’t the setup you described ideal for you?

    TEAM A            TEAM B
┌╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴┐
|                                     |
|                                     |
|                                     |
|                                     |
|                                     |
└╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴╴┘
     Parents A       Parents B
  Dickhead B

 

Edited by Llogg

#13083
On 12/13/2021 at 8:31 AM, mininghorn88 said:

When you are at a public toilet and you line the toilet ring with toilet paper or the pre-made sheet and the auto flush feature comes on and sucks the barrier away before you have a chance to sit down.

We have those demon powered toilets at work along with "you'll never get hot water" motion activated sinks.

#13084
    TEAM A            TEAM B______________________________________|                                     ||                                     ||                                     ||                                     ||                                     ||_____________________________________|    Parents A       Parents B Dickhead B

 



This ensures that...
1. The parents aren't jacking around with their kids & being an ass to the coach.

2. They can simply walk sideways 20 yards to fight the other parents vs. having to walk across the pitch & get in the way of their kids.

#13085

I prefer kids on one side and parents on the other. Especially at the younger ages. Helps kids stay focused on the game and not farting around with parents or siblings. Also helps coaches instructions being heard better and not lost in the asshole parents who want to coach from the sideline. I’ve been guilty of such so I keep my mouth shut now.

#13086

People who make that clicking sound with their mouth. Usually the wink + click gesture. Its so goddamn smarmy. 

#13088
5 hours ago, 52-80 said:

And weak ass public bathroom air dryers like what the fuck is up with that shit

Would you prefer the turbo model germ blower, forcibly fusing fecal matter to your hands instead of the weak bond caused by the lesser model?  Either way you’re getting crap blown into your pores with heat and force. 
Skip the air dryer and dry your hands on your pubic hair. It’s cleaner. 

Edited by nnm

#13089
1 hour ago, nnm said:

Would you prefer the turbo model germ so trader, forcibly fusing fecal matter to your hands instead of the weak bond caused by the lesser model?  Either way you’re getting crap blown into your pores with heat and force. 
Skip the air dryer and dry your hands on your pubic hair. It’s cleaner. 

Those things gross me out like nothing else for the above reasons. Mmmmm nothing like a warmed, fecal matter coating on my hands....

#13090
14 hours ago, ROFL BOX said:

 


This ensures that...
1. The parents aren't jacking around with their kids & being an ass to the coach.

2. They can simply walk sideways 20 yards to fight the other parents vs. having to walk across the pitch & get in the way of their kids.
 

 

Yes.  I think there's more thought that went into the design of this than Fudbelly anticipated.

#13091
On 12/15/2021 at 10:13 AM, formermav43 said:

I hate the proliferation of EDGE to describe a 4-3 DE/3-4 OLB type.

I don’t mind the term itself, but it annoys me that it’s all caps when all other positions are abbreviated with one or two letters. It should be Edge, abbreviated with just an E. The only potential confusion would be with DE, but it effectively replaces that anyway.

We don’t say a guy plays CENTER or SAFETY. It makes no sense.

Still going to be confusing:

large.jpg

#13092
Yes.  I think there's more thought that went into the design of this than Fudbelly anticipated.

Maybe you’re reading too much in to this. My original post simply was that when all parents are on the same sideline it drives me nuts when other parents sprawl down the entire sideline. You should sit on the side across from your team. Make mid field the split.
#13093
On 11/28/2021 at 12:52 PM, Prepuce of Doom said:

Maybe I'm underestimating the degree of staining, but isn't that kind of part for the course for tea and coffee mugs? Seems like an overreaction to toss a mug you care about. 

And a denture cleaner tablet can do wonders. 

I’m happy to report that the denture cleaning tablets worked. There was an ugly dark brown spot in the bottom ‘corner’ of the mug. I first soaked it in a little bit of vinegar and that showed some improvement. I didn’t want to fill the whole mug repeatedly with vinegar even though plain white vinegar is cheap. That might have been more cost effective but I went out and bought a box of Polident and gave it a try.

This is after four treatments. There’s still a little bit of a tinge on the sides so I wouldn’t say it’s like new but this is very acceptable. My mug is saved and I’ve got plenty of cleaning tablets left for future use. Thanks for the tip!

4FED5D74-9FA9-4AE9-A3B6-BBB37DD00E37.thumb.jpeg.157553bc70a72c340a820893a6e83043.jpeg

#13094

Fucking weather when you have something planned and it fucks it up but is great the NEXT day. Finally, was going to get small repairs done around the house. I was so happy about it, I considered it a Christmas present to myself. 2 things were electrical and 2 things were plumber-y. Shit. 

sad panda GIF

#13096
On 7/8/2021 at 12:03 PM, Hanrahan said:

People who wait in drive-through lines that extend into the street.  The first guy to do this has got to be thinking, "fuck everyone behind me, I ain't moving."

fucking starbucks near my house will have 6 or 7 cars backed up into the street. 


And don't get me started on the Costco gas station...dumbfucks  will be 6 or 7 deep in the center lane waiting to turn left into the station.  I always drive past a block or so, make a U turn, and then go right in front of all of them to turn in. 

#13098

There are not expletives in the English language to describe my hatred of changing the headlight bulbs on my wife’s POS Chevy Equinox. I hope the engineer that designed how to access the bulb dies in a fire.

#13100

10 motherfucking cherry cordials in a box...

when there should be a dozen.  I wanna see them do it with eggs... hell, at least you can open the eggs and see them though... i mean yeah, it says "10 pieces" on the box, but who has time for readin?  look at all that deception with the "2 trays of 5" bullshit.   

cherries.jpg

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