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  • Scheiss Meister
    Scheiss Meister

    The day I retired I set an auto reply that said something like "As of EOB today I will be retired.  If you expect me to reply to an email after 10:00 am today, you will be disappointed."  At the 3:00

  • Ghost of NMAS
    Ghost of NMAS

    I hate the people that ignore it when they have the right of way and try to wave me through first, it just fucks up the system and delays everyone

Posted Images

#8052
When I order iced tea with NO LEMON and they bring me a glass of tea with a big 'ol hunk of lemon on the rim. I don't say anything and just remove the offending citrus, but you can be damned sure I remember when I don't leave a tip.

Brother? Shit drives me nuts. Same thing happens with water.
Lemon is for cleaning.
#8054
So many marketing trends, commercials, etc using dogs to sell their shit.  People are pathetic.
People are lemmings.
#8055
12 hours ago, RPM said:

When I order iced tea with NO LEMON and they bring me a glass of tea with a big 'ol hunk of lemon on the rim. I don't say anything and just remove the offending citrus, but you can be damned sure I remember when I don't leave a tip.

When did lemons in water become so fancy. I just want water. If I wanted lemon water I would have ordered it. 

#8058
On November 25, 2019 at 10:51 PM, Okie State said:
On November 25, 2019 at 10:50 PM, RollLeft said:
So many marketing trends, commercials, etc using dogs to sell their shit.  People are pathetic.

People are lemmings.

Disney lied about the lemmings. 

#8062
The Num Lock key.

Yeah. Fuck that thing. Replace it with an “Any” key and it would be less irritating.

  • Author
#8063

I can't find the radio station for the early Thanksgiving game while driving into Austin

#8064

People in front of you in the check out line who, after paying for their stuff, have to spend ten minutes reorganizing their billfold/purse/pockets after spending the previous ten minutes digging through them trying to find 37 cents because they are mortified of the idea of having to put 63 cents in change back into them.

#8066
On 11/24/2019 at 4:10 PM, Walden Ponderer said:

Overheard recent order: garlic cheese-bread, but without the garlic, because "garlic is bad for you."

 Literally the only honest-to-goodness healthy ingredient in that order, and it's the one getting called out.

Lucy made a mistake back there on the Serengeti. Humanity never should have come down from the trees.

Be around me for the next six hours after I eat some and you might agree with them.

#8068
On 11/25/2019 at 9:34 PM, T’Boo Ted Marshall said:


Brother? Shit drives me nuts. Same thing happens with water.
Lemon is for cleaning fish.

 

#8070
12 minutes ago, Patricio Swayze said:

Hearing “put his foot in the ground” for the millionth time in the 2019 season. Stop.

High pointed the ball, when the ball is not even close to the apogee of its arc.

#8071
Getting your feet wet in super cold water.
 



Our cat actually nailed this move the other morning. She knows I’ll get up and feed her even though I’m trying to sleep in. I was watching her sit on the night stand next to me when I wriggled my feet under the comforter.
She went airborne. BOOM.
Nailed the landing.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
#8072

Basketball: referring to six consecutive points as a "run", e.g., "a 6-0 run", especially outside of the last couple minutes of a close game.

Six doesn't feel like enough to be called a "run". 

#8073
Basketball: referring to six consecutive points as a "run", e.g., "a 6-0 run", especially outside of the last couple minutes of a close game.
Six doesn't feel like enough to be called a "run". 

Minimum 7+ or a 10+ differential.

14-2 run is a run.
#8074
16 hours ago, SwanderedTalent said:

Basketball: referring to six consecutive points as a "run", e.g., "a 6-0 run", especially outside of the last couple minutes of a close game.

Six doesn't feel like enough to be called a "run". 

"Spurtability"

#8075

I generally agree with the argument that it's sometimes overused (though it doesn't bother me - sometimes it's helpful for when you're not paying super close attention to the game, etc.) but I would suggest that the overall flow of the game itself should determine the shortest length of a run. In some bullshit UVA vs. Drying Paint 34-32 final score rock fight, a 4-0 run is a run. 

#8076
On 11/27/2019 at 12:21 PM, HenryJames said:

The Num Lock key.

I’m assuming you mean the number pad should always be on, otherwise you and I are no longer friends 

#8077
20 hours ago, OrangEngr said:

I’m assuming you mean the number pad should always be on, otherwise you and I are no longer friends 

Username checks out

STEM freak

#8078

I-fuckng-35 fom Ft Worth to Hillsboro.

Who needs Yosemite when you can camp in the left hand lane all day.

I don’t necessarily believe in the death penalty, but these fuckers need a Sidewinder up the tailpipe.

 

#8079

The new design of fast food drive thrus. I can't be the only person to notice that newer fast food drive thrus are designed to lock you in. So if you're behind someone whose vehicle shuts down or the kitchen staff is short a few workers and orders are taking a long time, you're in it for the long haul. We used to drive out to Lubbock for Christmas and we'd always get dinner at McDonalds. Well one time there was a long line and we had to decide whether or not to commit to it or not. I go inside to take a piss and see if I can order. Kill 2 birds with 1 stone. There was only 1 employee there and she said that her coworkers had called in so it was just her. Order was a minimum 2 hour wait. Hell no we drove away. The drive thru was that locked in style so unless you could convince the people in front of you to drive off or the people behind you to back up, you're there for 2 hours.

  • Author
#8080

^^ i was stuck at a taco bell drive through for an hour back in college (~20 years ago).  if i'd have been in a truck i would have gone over the curb, car probably would have gotten high centered and left a bumper cover. 

#8081

Trivial road design issue that makes me surly: why doesn't the far north end of Lamar extend that last little bit to Howard Lane? There's a southbound connector from Howard/I35 to Lamar, but If you want to take Lamar **northbound** to Howard it forces you to turn back on the southbound 35 service road.

*Unless you can cut through that school campus off the left, which is still not ideal

 

#8082
1 hour ago, elfenix said:

^^ i was stuck at a taco bell drive through for an hour back in college (~20 years ago).  if i'd have been in a truck i would have gone over the curb, car probably would have gotten high centered and left a bumper cover. 

Hello Josh Gordon, guess the username means your career is about to rise from the ashes? I guess the wacky weed made the wait more tolerable. 
https://www.espn.com/college-football/news/story?id=5658519

#8084

Shitty bowl names.

 

Makers Wanted Bahamas Bowl

Tropical Smoothie Cafe Frisco Bowl

Cheribundi Boca Raton Bowl

Cure Bowl

R+L Carriers New Orleans BOwl

Bad Boy Mowers Gasparilla Bowl

San Diego County Credit Union Holiday Bowl

 

what?

  • Author
#8086

holiday bowl used to be a pretty big deal.  or maybe i just thought that because it seems like we always ended up in san diego.

#8088
2 minutes ago, Buffsoldier said:

I used to laugh my ass off every time I heard the phrase, 'Poulan WeedEater Bowl'.

That was the beginning of the end.

#8089
1 hour ago, elfenix said:

holiday bowl used to be a pretty big deal.  or maybe i just thought that because it seems like we always ended up in san diego.

Wasn't it the Big 12 second place team tie in? Seems like around the early 2000s?

#8090

It was really the third place...Fiesta/BCS was 1, Cotton was 2, Holiday was 3, Alamo quickly rises to 4 in the Big XII, Insight.com was 5 I think.  

  • Author
#8093

it's december 9th there's a cold front blowing through in about 2 hours and so i don't particularly want to turn on the AC but it's too goddamn warm to sleep. 

Edited by elfenix

#8094
On 12/6/2019 at 5:23 PM, Iceman said:

I-fuckng-35 fom Ft Worth to Hillsboro.

Who needs Yosemite when you can camp in the left hand lane all day.

I don’t necessarily believe in the death penalty, but these fuckers need a Sidewinder up the tailpipe.

I mean, I guess. But I’d suck off a homeless guy to drive that stretch instead of Salado to Austin.

#8095
On 12/8/2019 at 3:09 PM, nnm said:

Hello Josh Gordon, guess the username means your career is about to rise from the ashes? I guess the wacky weed made the wait more tolerable. 
https://www.espn.com/college-football/news/story?id=5658519

That isn’t even the Taco Bell drive thru Big 12 champ.

https://www.latimes.com/archives/la-xpm-1999-nov-19-sp-35414-story.html

 

  • Author
#8096

dude at the post office who was trying to figure out how to mail a bomb to antarctica. all i needed was a goddamn label which the clerks jealously guard like mithril.  and this asshole take 15 goddamn minutes to mail a fucking package. 

#8097
I-fuckng-35 fom Ft Worth to Hillsboro.
Who needs Yosemite when you can camp in the left hand lane all day.
I don’t necessarily believe in the death penalty, but these fuckers need a Sidewinder up the tailpipe.
 
Don't you mean from Hillsboro to Fort Worth? Only communists use N to S.
#8099
7 minutes ago, Cody2422 said:

How about assholes on a plane sitting behind you that insist on deboarding before you 

Had a lady do this on one of our legs on one of our trips this summer.  The kicker was she boarded on a wheelchair.  She stood up most of the flight talking to friends of hers and then when the plane stopped she starts weasling her way back to the front of the plane.

Another plane issue... Flew Southwest over a year ago.  We were in the high As so I was hopefuly to get a exit seat.  Any way this elderly couple (high 70s at the youngest) grabs the last available aisle.  The attendant asks them can they handle the duties involved.  The husband nods there is no verbal or physical response from the wife, attendant walks off and the wife asks they husband "What did she say?".  

#8100
23 minutes ago, Cody2422 said:

How about assholes on a plane sitting behind you that insist on deboarding before you 

If that pisses you off, don't fly in China. I sweater god, they start to deboard the plane when the landing gear come down.

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