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  • Scheiss Meister
    Scheiss Meister

    The day I retired I set an auto reply that said something like "As of EOB today I will be retired.  If you expect me to reply to an email after 10:00 am today, you will be disappointed."  At the 3:00

  • Ghost of NMAS
    Ghost of NMAS

    I hate the people that ignore it when they have the right of way and try to wave me through first, it just fucks up the system and delays everyone

Posted Images

#12502
On 8/27/2021 at 10:45 AM, Vic Mackey said:

People who use the word 'adulting'. Seems this came around some years ago. Used for any little task an adult might do i.e. grocery shopping, paying bills, taking care of your kids, cleaning the house, yardwork.

Shut the fuck up.

This is the first time I've ever heard that term, and just one time makes me ragey.

#12503
On 8/30/2021 at 5:09 PM, DougO said:

When I find a rare t-shirt design that I actually like, only to find the design is on the back. I hate the big back design with nothing or a tiny thing on the front. Lately Academy is pushing either cool back design shirts, or stupid, embarrassing dumbass phrases that ruin otherwise decent designs on their front design shirts. They used to make some really nice stuff at a good price, now it's all redneck depot.

I'm running out of stuff to wear.

I refuse to wear shirts with pocket print that has no pocket. I don't wear shirts with pockets either but the print style pisses me off beyond belief 

#12505
35 minutes ago, HRSchenker said:

I refuse to wear shirts with pocket print that has no pocket. I don't wear shirts with pockets either but the print style pisses me off beyond belief 

Wait, there exist tshirts that have a picture of a pocket, but no actual pocket?

#12506
1 hour ago, High Plains Drifter said:

 

I can out trivial that:

I have a coworker that uses "respectfully" in her signature.

 

Respectfully,

High Plains Drifter

 

Is she prior service?  In the military, loosely translated, it means, ‘Go fuck yourself!’ Or ‘Have a great day,’ depending upon context.

That’s where I’ve seen it the most.

Edited by slorch

#12507

I really couldn't care less how people sign their emails as long as it's not Gig Em or Boomer Sooner.  We do have someone in our office who signs his email with something to do with LSU though.  I typically just stick to a simple Thanks with my first name below.

Edited by NeverMarryAStripper

#12508
4 minutes ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

I really couldn't care less how people sign their emails as long as it's not Gig Em or Boomer Sooner.  We do have someone in our office who signs his email with something to do with LSU though.  I typically just stick to a simple Thanks with my first name below.

You could just put "Regards," knowing the double meaning that is used here.  It would probably give you quite a bit of satisfaction at times.  

Repped for proper usage of "couldn't care less."

#12510

Located @ the very bottom, after the signature:

"No trees were harmed in the production of this email, however a few electrons were horribly inconvenienced."

(Personal email, which I rarely use. The acct. that gets all of the contest registrations, coupons, probable spam, etc.)

. . . .

Scout correspondence:

"Yours in Scouting,"

Sent from my SM-G950U1 using Tapatalk



#12511
2 hours ago, SHOOTER12 said:

This is the first time I've ever heard that term, and just one time makes me ragey.

The first time I saw it was on the El Arroyo sign on Instagram several years ago.  So blame them.

#12512

Also, it annoys the fuck out of me that damn near every single business wants you to download their app.  I have enough random apps on my phone already, I don’t feel any need to have the app for the Chinese restaurant I order from 2-3 times/year.  I’ll just fucking call you, order, and come pick it up.

#12513
4 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

I really couldn't care less how people sign their emails as long as it's not Gig Em or Boomer Sooner.  We do have someone in our office who signs his email with something to do with LSU though.  I typically just stick to a simple Thanks with my first name below.

I sign off with boom shanka... loosely translated it means may your seed be fruitful in your wifes womb.

#12517
4 hours ago, slorch said:

Is she prior service?  In the military, loosely translated, it means, ‘Go fuck yourself!’ Or ‘Have a great day,’ depending upon context.

That’s where I’ve seen it the most.

 

no, not even close.

 

#12518
9 hours ago, Patricio Swayze said:

Weird. I just put my name and link to my onlyfans.

You doin' some dirty dancing over there?

#12520
14 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

We do have someone in our office who signs his email with something to do with LSU though

"I smell like corndogs"

#12521
5 hours ago, deadshank said:

Better than “scouting in yours.”

they workshopped "In Your Scouts" but then there was that lawsuit.

 

#12522
We have key cards to get in the doors at work. Just a plain card, no picture on it, no logos, nothing. You hold it by the sensor and it beeps and unlocks the door. The old women up here always call it a "badge", which I hate. I have a badge from when I worked at the county sheriff. It wasn't a plastic card. And an ID card isn't a badge either. 
 

This is how the thread works.
Well done
#12523
On 9/2/2021 at 12:57 PM, Sandman said:

We have key cards to get in the doors at work. Just a plain card, no picture on it, no logos, nothing. You hold it by the sensor and it beeps and unlocks the door. The old women up here always call it a "badge", which I hate. I have a badge from when I worked at the county sheriff. It wasn't a plastic card. And an ID card isn't a badge either. 

 

image.thumb.jpeg.d3e67bb1880d4caf02a8fd61c3a9eb44.jpeg

#12524

oblivious people in traffic who wont inch their car up for cars turning behind them, squeezing into lane behind them, etc.  pay attention and be courteous, fuckers

#12525
2 hours ago, 52-80 said:

oblivious people in traffic who wont inch their car up for cars turning behind them, squeezing into lane behind them, etc.  pay attention and be courteous, fuckers

This is why we need two types of car horns - one that's a "hey, heads up - little help here?" and one that's a "fuck you I hope your insides melt, you idiot piece of shit." 

Because these obliviots are always the ones immediately ready to take offense instead of figuring out what they might be doing wrong, or what you might be trying to communicate when you tap the horn at them. 

Edited by Prepuce of Doom

#12526
6 hours ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

This is why we need two types of car horns - one that's a "hey, heads up - little help here?" and one that's a "fuck you I hope your insides melt, you idiot piece of shit." 

Because these obliviots are always the ones immediately ready to take offense instead of figuring out what they might be doing wrong, or what you might be trying to communicate when you tap the horn at them. 

Yes, but the “heads up” beep used to be a courtesy. Now someone has to do it at almost every red light because at least half of the drivers immediately look down on their phones as soon as they get to the red light, and are oblivious when the light changes. Rage inducing. 

#12527
6 hours ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

This is why we need two types of car horns - one that's a "hey, heads up - little help here?" and one that's a "fuck you I hope your insides melt, you idiot piece of shit." 

Because these obliviots are always the ones immediately ready to take offense instead of figuring out what they might be doing wrong, or what you might be trying to communicate when you tap the horn at them. 

I'd just ring the second one every time. 

#12528
Located @ the very bottom, after the signature:

"No trees were harmed in the production of this email, however a few electrons were horribly inconveninced."




Was it inconvenient to use spell check?
#12530
Also, it annoys the fuck out of me that damn near every single business wants you to download their app.  I have enough random apps on my phone already, I don’t feel any need to have the app for the Chinese restaurant I order from 2-3 times/year.  I’ll just fucking call you, order, and come pick it up.

You’re speaking my language. It’s cool to have your own app! It helps with marketing! Yeah, it also means that I say “fuck your barrier to entry,” I’ll order from the place that lets me just click a coupla buttons on their website or call to place my order.
#12532
That fecking Appleby's commercial with the country hip hop, redneck dancing crap. 

Goddamn it. I agree, but say “FUCKING”. This isn’t SECRant. Fuck fuck fuck fucking fuck fuck.
#12534
20 minutes ago, Patricio Swayze said:


Goddamn it. I agree, but say “FUCKING”. This isn’t SECRant. Fuck fuck fuck fucking fuck fuck.

LOL. Theysay frickin'. Feckin' is the way Scots and Irish say fucking. 

 

Edited by Crapinon

#12535
8 hours ago, Knoxtnhorn said:

Dear ESPN:

There is nobody in this country checking WNBA scores.

Dear Knox, 

You are wrong. 

 

Sincerely, 

Degenerate Gamblers 

#12536
3 hours ago, Underdog said:

Dear Knox, 

You are wrong. 

 

Sincerely, 

Degenerate Gamblers 

If I ever find myself betting on a WNBA game I’m gonna just throw in the towel.

Sincerely,

A guy who has bet a lot of money on Hawaii football games over the years because of the late start times.

#12537
On 9/6/2021 at 5:33 AM, Knoxtnhorn said:

Dear ESPN:

There is nobody in this country checking WNBA scores.

you finna get canceled.

  • Author
#12539

when i forget that the next day is a new contacts day and so i wash and store the current pair like i normally do, only to toss them and the solution out in the morning.

#12540
2 hours ago, elfenix said:

when i forget that the next day is a new contacts day and so i wash and store the current pair like i normally do, only to toss them and the solution out in the morning.

lasik is sooooo cash money.  worth it 100000 times over

#12541
20 minutes ago, 52-80 said:

lasik is sooooo cash money.  worth it 100000 times over

Until you cross that 40-45 threshold. Then you wear glasses anyway. 

Edited by nnm

#12542
On 9/6/2021 at 7:53 AM, Underdog said:

Dear Knox, 

You are wrong. 

 

Sincerely, 

Degenerate Gamblers 

And the parents of said W-Nnnnnnnnn-BA players 'o course ....  nah.. even they say fuck it.

  • Author
#12543
29 minutes ago, nnm said:

Until you cross that 40-45 threshold. Then you wear glasses anyway. 

preview.jpg

#12547
On 9/2/2021 at 3:07 PM, High Plains Drifter said:

 

I can out trivial that:

I have a coworker that uses "respectfully" in her signature.

 

Respectfully,

High Plains Drifter

 

I do that sometimes, particularly when I'm telling someone they fucked up or are a dumbass.  It's kind of like "with all due respect, sir"

As for "Blessed" or "Have a Blessed Day", I tend to end my replies with "Bless your heart"..

#12548

Fucking Disney continuing to run a yellow plug on the score ribbon during ABC / ESPN CFB games.  Thought we'd been thru this shit before - in the middle of every play you glance down to see that plug, thinking there's a flag on the play.  Only to see that it's a promo for a god-awful WBNA game, or something just as bad. 

  • Author
#12549

was almost run into twice today by people who couldn't figure out how turn lanes work at intersections.  and these people are allowed to reproduce!

#12550
3 hours ago, Wally Pryor said:

Fucking Disney continuing to run a yellow plug on the score ribbon during ABC / ESPN CFB games.  Thought we'd been thru this shit before - in the middle of every play you glance down to see that plug, thinking there's a flag on the play.  Only to see that it's a promo for a god-awful WBNA game, or something just as bad. 

You don't think that's an accident, do you? 

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