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  • Scheiss Meister
    Scheiss Meister

    The day I retired I set an auto reply that said something like "As of EOB today I will be retired.  If you expect me to reply to an email after 10:00 am today, you will be disappointed."  At the 3:00

  • Ghost of NMAS
    Ghost of NMAS

    I hate the people that ignore it when they have the right of way and try to wave me through first, it just fucks up the system and delays everyone

Posted Images

#13152
54 minutes ago, General Specific said:


Wrong!
da403529d691828ddb34999de1ee550b.png

This is the only FF picture that should be posted.  It was burned into my brain in adolescence.

farrah-fawcett-red-swimsuit-bruce-mcboom

#13153
Agreed. It seems particularly cruel to put a handicapped person on a pedestal.

And that person’s name??? Art.
#13154

I thought it was Neal? 

or am I thinking of Stu?  

#13156
10 hours ago, Patricio Swayze said:

I just lost all respect for Alice Cooper. Just saw him in a commercial with Baker docuhebag mayfield. Fuck everything.

Errbody has bills to pay. 

#13157
12 hours ago, Patricio Swayze said:

I just lost all respect for Alice Cooper. Just saw him in a commercial with Baker docuhebag mayfield. Fuck everything.

It's actually pronounced "Mil-ee-wah-kay", which is Algonquin for, "the Good Land".

#13158
On 12/20/2021 at 6:33 AM, davidg said:

Plumbing is easy, only gotta know 4 things:  Hot on the left/Cold on the right, Shit flows downhill, payday is Friday and don't bite your fingernails.  

The rule of plumbing is that if it’s too loose, it leaks. If it’s too tight, it leaks. 
 

Fuck plumbing. 

#13159

Bullshit legal marketing emails with transparent lies. 

"Greetings Storm the Field, we reached out to (insert partner name) about how we can help with SEO, social media marketing & client lead generation. He indicated you were the best person to speak with. Are you free for a 15 minute call later?"

Yeah, I'd put the odds of that having occurred at 0.0%.

#13161
1 hour ago, Cheeseweasel said:

Why do people still send Christmas cards? Especially the ones with a posed family picture. Just post it on social media so I can ignore it.

[laughs in "wife is asking for addresses so she can send out cards with the annual JC Penny photo studio picture]

#13162
3 hours ago, Storm the Field said:

Bullshit legal marketing emails with transparent lies. 

"Greetings Storm the Field, we reached out to (insert partner name) about how we can help with SEO, social media marketing & client lead generation. He indicated you were the best person to speak with. Are you free for a 15 minute call later?"

Yeah, I'd put the odds of that having occurred at 0.0%.

HD wallpaper: star wars, Admiral Ackbar, it's a trap | Wallpaper Flare

#13163
Why do people still send Christmas cards? Especially the ones with a posed family picture. Just post it on social media so I can ignore it.

Wife waited until Saturday to order cards from Costco and they’re sold out. Thanks Obama.
#13164

People who ask your opinion and then get pissed because you didn’t agree with theirs.

Fuck me.  If you’re going to give direction, then don’t couch it as an inquiry to my inclinations.

Shit or get off the pot…

#13165

Three shitter stalls in the bathroom. I enter the empty bathroom and choose stall number 1. Next person enters to also shit but sits down in #2.

  • Popular Post
#13167

Lazy neighbors that refuse to pick up the miscellaneous trash that appears in the front yard of their houses or on their sidewalks.  
 

I understand YOU didn’t put it there and it’s not YOUR trash.  Just quit being a lazy mofo and pick up that crap and throw it in the trash can.  

Have some pride.  

#13168
44 minutes ago, deadshank said:

Lazy neighbors that refuse to pick up the miscellaneous trash that appears in the front yard of their houses or on their sidewalks.  
 

I understand YOU didn’t put it there and it’s not YOUR trash.  Just quit being a lazy mofo and pick up that crap and throw it in the trash can.  

Have some pride.  

You live in a place where random trash just shows up?

#13169
Why do people still send Christmas cards? Especially the ones with a posed family picture. Just post it on social media so I can ignore it.

That’s a lot of words instead of telling us you don’t have any friends
#13170
17 minutes ago, Biff Tannen said:

You live in a place where random trash just shows up?

Styro cup that got away from someone, a random hat lost by a kid, the odd urban tumbleweed, some item left behind by a lawn crew, a dipshit that threw his beer can out the window, etc.  Odds and ends type stuff.   Not a 30 yard roll of dumpster worth of construction debris. 

#13171
28 minutes ago, MNLonghornFUKM said:


That’s a lot of words instead of telling us you don’t have any friends

Thanks for the Christmas card by the way. 

#13172
Lazy neighbors that refuse to pick up the miscellaneous trash that appears in the front yard of their houses or on their sidewalks.  
 
I understand YOU didn’t put it there and it’s not YOUR trash.  Just quit being a lazy mofo and pick up that crap and throw it in the trash can.  
Have some pride.  

Are you on the HOA committee? No. Fuck you! And fuck the HOA as well!
#13173
15 minutes ago, General Specific said:


Are you on the HOA committee? No. Fuck you! And fuck the HOA as well!

Nope.  Just don’t care for lazy slobs. 

#13174
1 hour ago, deadshank said:

Lazy neighbors that refuse to pick up the miscellaneous trash that appears in the front yard of their houses or on their sidewalks.  
 

I understand YOU didn’t put it there and it’s not YOUR trash.  Just quit being a lazy mofo and pick up that crap and throw it in the trash can.  

Have some pride.  

What if I kick dogshit out in the street or up on the sidewalk?

Is that surly?  My dogs didn’t do it.  Figure maybe the shitbags who did it will pick it up their next time around…

#13175
Just now, slorch said:

What if I kick dogshit out in the street or up on the sidewalk?

Is that surly?  My dogs didn’t do it.  Figure maybe the shitbags who did it will pick it up their next time around…

Right.  Dog crap is a different story. 

#13176
4 minutes ago, deadshank said:

Right.  Dog crap is a different story. 

Ain’t shit trivial about mother fucking assholes who won’t pick up after their dogs.

#13177
Three shitter stalls in the bathroom. I enter the empty bathroom and choose stall number 1. Next person enters to also shit but sits down in #2.

Nothing trivial about this at all. I hope those people that choose stall #2 get a hemorrhoid.
#13178

Nothing trivial about this at all. I hope those people that choose stall #2 get a hemorrhoid.

Its probably the same guys that dribbles piss in front of the pisser as well. Never understood how one could be so careless, thoughtless or lack such self awareness in a public space.
#13179
3 minutes ago, General Specific said:


Its probably the same guys that dribbles piss in front of the pisser as well. Never understood how one could be so careless, thoughtless or lack such self awareness in a public space.

Prostate cancer is serious bidness

#13181
On 12/19/2021 at 1:28 PM, Patricio Swayze said:

There are not expletives in the English language to describe my hatred of changing the headlight bulbs on my wife’s POS Chevy Equinox. I hope the engineer that designed how to access the bulb dies in a fire.

We should buy that engineer a Pinto and ensure it happens accidentally.  

#13182
30 minutes ago, General Specific said:


Its probably the same guys that dribbles piss in front of the pisser as well. Never understood how one could be so careless, thoughtless or lack such self awareness in a public space.

The “getting old sucks” thread is that way ——->

#13184
16 minutes ago, Trey3216 said:

We should buy that engineer a Pinto and ensure it happens accidentally.  

And add Zee fucking German engineer at BMW who thought it was a good idea to tie the high beam switch to your speedometer gadgets.  $25 part becomes an $1,100 dealer only fix because only an authorized dealer can do anything related to a speedometer part/ directly attached for peripherally.

#13186
1 hour ago, Llogg said:

Smfh

20211223_063906.jpg

Oh hell no !!!  That would cause me great rage.  At least they're clothespinned shut. The wife just opens a pack, and walks away.

#13188

My neighbors across the street who don’t break down their boxes before throwing them in the recycle bin. I know they got a Samsung TV last year, and sometime this year they had a baby who wears Huggies. They also don’t take in their cans until 2-3 days after trash day  

 

The same neighbors threw out a couch last weekend. They probably didn’t contact the waste removal company and the couch will still be there when I get back from vacation. Those assholes. 

#13189

Its probably the same guys that dribbles piss in front of the pisser as well. Never understood how one could be so careless, thoughtless or lack such self awareness in a public space.

Maybe I….I mean, the guy you’re talking about, who lived near you, and is definitely not me….has a short dick. Didja think about that, man?
#13191
On 12/22/2021 at 8:07 AM, Biff Tannen said:

You live in a place where random trash just shows up?

Forget it, he's not going to tell you her name...

#13192

Most of us are more polite and refer to them as our relatives or in-laws. Random trash is a bit harsh.

#13194
8 hours ago, Sam Lin said:

Most of us are more polite and refer to them as our relatives or in-laws. Random trash is a bit harsh.

You serious, Clark? 

#13195

when you get settled in for a nap and realize that you kinda have to pee.

#13196

Big cheeseburger and large fries at the drive thru. 
1 ketchup. no napkins. 
Motherfucker…

  • Author
#13197

i can't renew my mom's nyt cooking gift sub until the one i got her last year runs out.  who  at ny times decided that was a good idea?

Edited by elfenix

#13198

Die Hard was a decent flick. I don’t give a shit if it’s a “Christmas movie.” Just shut the fuck up already! Watch it whenever the fuck you want!!

Edited by 'stache

#13200

Ordered a pair of shorts from Amazon. Quality is good for what I paid, but is with these shallow pockets! I feel like I am going to lose anything in my pockets when I am sitting in my car.

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