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  • Scheiss Meister
    Scheiss Meister

    The day I retired I set an auto reply that said something like "As of EOB today I will be retired.  If you expect me to reply to an email after 10:00 am today, you will be disappointed."  At the 3:00

  • Ghost of NMAS
    Ghost of NMAS

    I hate the people that ignore it when they have the right of way and try to wave me through first, it just fucks up the system and delays everyone

Posted Images

#14752
4 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

The most efficient way would be to put everything in a blender and serve it in a cup

My Bass-O-Matic broke years ago, never got around to replacing it. 

#14753

Restuarants that stack all of the food in the middle of the plate.

A month or so ago I went to a nicer restuarant that I was told did a top notch chicken fried steak.  The chicken fried steak was served on a bed of mashed potatoes and was covered in white gravy and was topped off with grilled asparagus.  The problem with this was that the crunchy batter around the steak was all soggy so I could not enjoy the crunchiness of biting into a chicken fried steak.

The next time I went I ordered the chicken fried steak but instructed them that I wanted the steak and the potatoes to NOT be stacked and that I wanted the gravy in a bowl.

They told me that the kitchen was working on their "presentation" and that others had mentioned not stacking everything too.

#14757
On 7/9/2022 at 8:19 AM, nnm said:

The truck I learned to drive in, a 1968 Dodge stepside, straight-six, 3-on-the-tree, had no radio, no A/C, and no sissy cup holders. You held your beer between your legs like a real man.  
19250AC5-17F2-4CA2-A8CC-2F3718A56147.jpeg.d32e4a7c8bc583d6d3b70a5898b1dadf.jpeg

D1F31379-706B-46FF-BBEA-AAB097390A7E.png.686c46560f8d206bd88c651942e4da04.png

 

My first ride was a 68 GMC, 3 on the tree, aftermarket 8 track, no A/C, Gumbo Wide Mudders on the back with razor blades on the front.  It had a massive pipe bumper no mailbox or reflector could stand up too.  Dad made a 2x12 bracket that could mount on it with a small seat and seat belt for hunting rabbits, because standing up in the back was too dangerous.  LOL.  Beautiful days.

#14759
31 minutes ago, Cheeseweasel said:

You food sat for so long that it's growing.

That’s the Royal Ossetra served at The French Laundry in Yountville, CA. Chef Thomas Keller used tweezers to place those greens there. The caviar sitting on top of brioche is not remotely similar to putting crispy food on top of mashed potatoes. The dry brioche isn’t ruining the caviar on top. And there’s nothing dry and crispy on top of the caviar to get sullied by it’s moisture. It’s a non-sequitur but an attractive dish.

 

  • Author
#14763

The gap in the front doors at my office building. These doors were replaced twice during a recent remodel and no one decided to put anything that might fill the gap and keep the cold air in. Gap goes all the way around each door, in both sets.

6364c2b06e826ada9ce215cde633be13.jpg

#14764
9 hours ago, WhatTheBuck said:

That’s the Royal Ossetra served at The French Laundry in Yountville, CA. Chef Thomas Keller used tweezers to place those greens there. The caviar sitting on top of brioche is not remotely similar to putting crispy food on top of mashed potatoes. The dry brioche isn’t ruining the caviar on top. And there’s nothing dry and crispy on top of the caviar to get sullied by it’s moisture. It’s a non-sequitur but an attractive dish.

 

Have you been there?

#14765

I'm sure there's been mention of this in this thread, but my god nothing makes me more worked up then when you enter a password, the app tells you it's the wrong password, and then when you go to change the password you try using said password and the app informs you that you can't use the same password twice in a row.

#14766
23 hours ago, elfenix said:

The gap in the front doors at my office building. These doors were replaced twice during a recent remodel and no one decided to put anything that might fill the gap and keep the cold air in. Gap goes all the way around each door, in both sets.

6364c2b06e826ada9ce215cde633be13.jpg

That's what you get for leasing space at the Woopway Tower. 

#14768

People who wait in line to order at a fast food restaurant but fail to make up their fucking minds while waiting despite having several minutes to do so.  Oh, so the 5 minutes you were waiting didn't afford you enough time to figure out what the fuck you want?  So now you need to dick around another 2-3 minutes at the counter before finally placing your order?  Yeah, fuck you.

And while I'm at it, don't fucking act surprised when the cashier asks that you actually, ya know, make a payment when you're done ordering.  Have your wallet or your phone or whatever ready to fucking go.  Some idiot in front of me last week spent forever digging through her purse to find her credit card despite having all the time in the world to get it ready when she was standing in line waiting.  Drives me nuts.   

#14769
4 hours ago, Al_4_ISU said:

I'm sure there's been mention of this in this thread, but my god nothing makes me more worked up then when you enter a password, the app tells you it's the wrong password, and then when you go to change the password you try using said password and the app informs you that you can't use the same password twice in a row.

Got on twitch for first time yesterday to watch a live stream of some pinball.  " The password you have entered is too simple and could be easily guessed."

Bitch, ain't nobody giving a flying fuck about this fucking website, other than people who are into the hobby and gaming.

It basically refused everything I entered that I could remember 3 months from now.  Guess I'll get a bot to retrieve that shit for me now.

It ain't like I had scanned my tax return or mortgage to the motherfuckers...

 

#14770
28 minutes ago, Carl Spackler said:

People who wait in line to order at a fast food restaurant but fail to make up their fucking minds while waiting despite having several minutes to do so.  Oh, so the 5 minutes you were waiting didn't afford you enough time to figure out what the fuck you want?  So now you need to dick around another 2-3 minutes at the counter before finally placing your order?  Yeah, fuck you.

And while I'm at it, don't fucking act surprised when the cashier asks that you actually, ya know, make a payment when you're done ordering.  Have your wallet or your phone or whatever ready to fucking go.  Some idiot in front of me last week spent forever digging through her purse to find her credit card despite having all the time in the world to get it ready when she was standing in line waiting.  Drives me nuts.   

I didn't really understand how stupid the average person is until I worked the front at McDonald's as a teen.  "I want a Whopper, onion rings, and a Pepsi."  Then they get pissed at you when you tell them "This is McDonald's.  Burger King is next door."  Or "My Big Mac was 20 cents less two months ago!"  No, bitch, it's been this price for at least a year.  And you tried that shit with me yesterday. Those are on top of the ones who wait until you ask them what they want to start making their decision, can't find their wallet, want to check the math on their order, etc. ad nauseam.

#14771
15 hours ago, Carl Spackler said:

People who wait in line to order at a fast food restaurant but fail to make up their fucking minds while waiting despite having several minutes to do so.

I see you have met my wife.

 

(Yes, I know I set myself up, do your worst)

#14775

My wife is also horribly indecisive about food.  Like to the point where the server has come (after a very appropriate amount of time) back to the table to get our order and she hasn't figured it out yet.

Right there you get, at a minimum, an extra 20 minutes tacked onto dinner.

#14776
16 hours ago, Carl Spackler said:

People who wait in line to order at a fast food restaurant but fail to make up their fucking minds while waiting despite having several minutes to do so.  Oh, so the 5 minutes you were waiting didn't afford you enough time to figure out what the fuck you want?  So now you need to dick around another 2-3 minutes at the counter before finally placing your order?  Yeah, fuck you.

And while I'm at it, don't fucking act surprised when the cashier asks that you actually, ya know, make a payment when you're done ordering.  Have your wallet or your phone or whatever ready to fucking go.  Some idiot in front of me last week spent forever digging through her purse to find her credit card despite having all the time in the world to get it ready when she was standing in line waiting.  Drives me nuts.   

RIP, John. 

#14778

fuel intake?  Is that a Euro term?

#14780
3 hours ago, GopherRock said:

People who pull up to the pumps at Costco that don't know what side of their car the fuel intake is on. 

Actually Costco's hoses are long enough to go to the other side.  Some of them even have signs that will tell you that.

#14784
On 7/12/2022 at 6:50 PM, Carl Spackler said:

People who wait in line to order at a fast food restaurant but fail to make up their fucking minds while waiting despite having several minutes to do so.  Oh, so the 5 minutes you were waiting didn't afford you enough time to figure out what the fuck you want?  So now you need to dick around another 2-3 minutes at the counter before finally placing your order?  Yeah, fuck you.

And while I'm at it, don't fucking act surprised when the cashier asks that you actually, ya know, make a payment when you're done ordering.  Have your wallet or your phone or whatever ready to fucking go.  Some idiot in front of me last week spent forever digging through her purse to find her credit card despite having all the time in the world to get it ready when she was standing in line waiting.  Drives me nuts.   

Avoid this thread, there are heathens that admit to clogging the drive thru line in order to check their meal with no regard to the cars behind them.

 

#14785
On 7/13/2022 at 1:57 AM, slorch said:

Got on twitch for first time yesterday to watch a live stream of some pinball.  " The password you have entered is too simple and could be easily guessed."

Bitch, ain't nobody giving a flying fuck about this fucking website, other than people who are into the hobby and gaming.

It basically refused everything I entered that I could remember 3 months from now.  Guess I'll get a bot to retrieve that shit for me now.

It ain't like I had scanned my tax return or mortgage to the motherfuckers...

 

Password incorrect : r/memesMemes Enter Name

Edited by 52-80

#14787
On 7/13/2022 at 11:33 AM, Al_4_ISU said:

My wife is also horribly indecisive about food.  Like to the point where the server has come (after a very appropriate amount of time) back to the table to get our order and she hasn't figured it out yet.

Right there you get, at a minimum, an extra 20 minutes tacked onto dinner.

When I was in High School. This cheerleader and I went on a date. She was fucking gorgeous. She was way the fuck out of my league. It took her like an hour and half decide what she wanted. At Chili's. 

I asked how fucking hard it was to find something to eat at fucking Chili's.

 

We did not have a second date.

#14788
4 hours ago, tx ind said:

Avoid this thread, there are heathens that admit to clogging the drive thru line in order to check their meal with no regard to the cars behind them.

 

That's a little different.  Briefly checking one's drive-thru order to make sure it's correct doesn't really bother me -- emphasis on "brief." 

Now, if your drive-thru order is substantially fucked up and you think you're just going to sit there for another 5 minutes waiting for the corrected order while all the drivers behind you sit and stew?  Hell no.  The proper protocol is to tell the employee what's missing, tell them you'll pull over and park in a space, and then wait for them to run your corrected order out to your car.  It's happened to me a few times through the years, and it's easily handled.  It ain't rocket surgery.   

#14789
On 6/14/2022 at 9:33 PM, mininghorn88 said:

We have a bi-weekly production meeting that starts 9:00am every time. There are about 20 or so attendees. The host(ess) always logs on about 15 minutes early. Once 9:00am hits she always says “ let’s give it a couple of more minutes to see if anyone else is going to log on”. This infuriates me to no end.

Last Wednesday I set up a different meeting (separate subject; one time event) at 10:00am with basically the same group of folks. 10:00 sharp rolls around and I start the meeting. She cuts in and asks “Aren’t you going to wait a minute to see if anyone else is going to log on?” My response was “No. If I wanted the meeting to start at 10:01 or 10:02 I would have said so in the meeting invitation. They will just have to catch up later on their own time.” Her response was a feeble “Oh, ok”.

I finally cracked today regarding this.  As usual, the hostess announced that she was going to wait a couple of more minutes before starting the meeting to allow everyone to log on.  I told her that she should just set the meeting time to 9:02am so that everyone will be on time.  She awkwardly stated that people get busy and they need the time.  I then asked her if their time was more valuable than the time of the people that logged in on time.  I just got a nervous laugh in response along with a couple of stammering incomplete sentences.

#14791
9 hours ago, CooterBrown said:

My Bronco doesn’t have a gas cap. It’s just the gas hole.

I've got a gas hole. Nothing goes in, but nasty stuff comes out in solid, sometimes liquid, and definitely gaseous form.

  • Author
#14792
On 7/13/2022 at 4:08 PM, GopherRock said:

People who pull up to the pumps at Costco that don't know what side of their car the fuel intake is on. 

watching people pump gas at costco makes me realize just how many fucking morons there are that make enough money to drive pretty nice cars.  bunker hill and greenway locations in houston will make you ragey with trivial shit

#14793

When you get a PDF doc that is all text, but instead of the original, it's a photocopy of all 1,958 pages.  Can't highlight, copy, paste into another document.

 

Started running the OCR program. It's been about an hour and it might get done by the time I wake up tomorrow.

#14794
5 hours ago, Superhero said:

Day 85, still waiting for my TSA Precheck RENEWAL.

 

Wife got her NEW TSA Precheck number in 3 days.

You must have pissed off a TSA agent somewhere. 
you-just-made-the-list-jericho.gif

#14795

Fucktard at airport security this morning tried to argue that his phone doesn’t set off metal detectors and repeatedly tried to walk through with it in his hand. He got a trip to the back room for his stupidity.

#14796
8 hours ago, Superhero said:

When you get a PDF doc that is all text, but instead of the original, it's a photocopy of all 1,958 pages.  Can't highlight, copy, paste into another document.

 

Started running the OCR program. It's been about an hour and it might get done by the time I wake up tomorrow.

Our boilerplate contract for construction projects includes a requirement that all text in all documents must be in searchable pdf format.  We have had contractors and engineers convert searchable documents to photocopy pdf documents, then submit that because they are confused on the concept.  How is that hard to understand?  We need a usable document, not a picture of one.

#14797
16 hours ago, mininghorn88 said:

I finally cracked today regarding this.  As usual, the hostess announced that she was going to wait a couple of more minutes before starting the meeting to allow everyone to log on.  I told her that she should just set the meeting time to 9:02am so that everyone will be on time.  She awkwardly stated that people get busy and they need the time.  I then asked her if their time was more valuable than the time of the people that logged in on time.  I just got a nervous laugh in response along with a couple of stammering incomplete sentences.

I will give people until about 2 minutes past the start time.

That being said, with the exception of somebody artificially extending the meeting, we are always going to be done before the posted finish time.

The team manages the idiots and they know their allotted meeting time is not going over.   Fair?

Oh, and most of the time people aren't late, because they get called afterwards, "WTF were you late?  Don't do it again."

Edited by slorch

#14798

Took me 24 minutes to get home from work. I hit almost every red light except for one (and I drove FAST to get to that yellow). Important that I get home because the contractor showed up earlier than expected.

On the way to work this morning and I only hit 2 red lights this morning and got there in 12 minutes flat. 

#14800

After 25+ years in O&G, 20 years of living in the Houston area, commuting 1 to 1-1/2 hour each way, I semi-retired and we moved to rural ETX. My retirement/2nd career gig is 2 miles away from my house. Although one theoretically could walk, it wouldn’t be safe on the highway in between work and home. 

As we all know, this summer has been hot in Texas. In the afternoon, sometimes I forget to remotely start my truck and cool it down before I get in it for the drive home. The drive isn’t long enough to cool the truck down before I get home.  

Today, this actually made me a little surly.

And then I realized what I was surly about, and remembered sitting in standstill traffic on BW8 for hours, weeks on end, for years. And then I felt better. 

The end. 

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