Jump to content
View in the app

A better way to browse. Learn more.

Surly Horns

A full-screen app on your home screen with push notifications, badges and more.

To install this app on iOS and iPadOS
  1. Tap the Share icon in Safari
  2. Scroll the menu and tap Add to Home Screen.
  3. Tap Add in the top-right corner.
To install this app on Android
  1. Tap the 3-dot menu (⋮) in the top-right corner of the browser.
  2. Tap Add to Home screen or Install app.
  3. Confirm by tapping Install.
Football ... Basketball ... Baseball ... Other Sports ... Futbol ... 🤫995🤫 ... Gambling ... Movies & TV ... Music ... Hobbies ... Lulz ... Food & Travel ... Daily Texan ... Business & Markets ... Cloak Room ... Help ... For Sale ... Board Discussion ... Advertise... Tailgate Donations

Featured Replies

  • Replies 21.2k
  • Views 1.4m
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Most Popular Posts

  • Scheiss Meister
    Scheiss Meister

    The day I retired I set an auto reply that said something like "As of EOB today I will be retired.  If you expect me to reply to an email after 10:00 am today, you will be disappointed."  At the 3:00

  • Ghost of NMAS
    Ghost of NMAS

    I hate the people that ignore it when they have the right of way and try to wave me through first, it just fucks up the system and delays everyone

Posted Images

#15102
1 hour ago, closetohumping said:

Saw someone texting while driving again. Was going 50 on the highway.  Shoot me please

Tell me you drove on a road, any road in America, today, without telling me you drove on a road. 

#15103

The fact that the de facto rule in Austin is “yield on a green light, because 50% of the time, some fucker is gonna blow through the red.” Was literally just bitching about this to GOLL last week….and then my wife got smacked on Saturday by a dumbass who blew the through a red, never even slowed down. Dumbass totaled her car and broke her arm, because in Austin, red lights are barely even a suggestion to stop. Fucking dickbag.

#15104
On 8/31/2022 at 11:34 PM, mininghorn88 said:

I am posting this here and not in the Parking Douchebaggery thread because technically the red Honda is parked properly between the stripes but could have moved closer to the curb to allow more room on the passenger side.  That is my truck barely visible to the right.  I typically try to park far away from any one else to avoid situations like this but this was at a doctor's office and parking was limited.  Fortunately I did not notice a ding on my door.  Now the Ford truck to the left is clearly improperly parked.

2059674666_parking082022.thumb.jpg.3921f13fc816046348d65dece33b9a47.jpg

People that don't hug the curb when parking on an end spot like do make me irrationally surly. Even worse when it's a right curb so you know they have to open their door towards your vehicle to get in. All that wasted space...

#15105
2 hours ago, Brisketexan said:

The fact that the de facto rule in Austin is “yield on a green light, because 50% of the time, some fucker is gonna blow through the red.” Was literally just bitching about this to GOLL last week….and then my wife got smacked on Saturday by a dumbass who blew the through a red, never even slowed down. Dumbass totaled her car and broke her arm, because in Austin, red lights are barely even a suggestion to stop. Fucking dickbag.

That really sucks. How is she doing now?

#15106
That really sucks. How is she doing now?

Pissed off that her arm’s in a sling, her car is gone, and she likely won’t get in to see an orthopedist before we leave town on Wednesday. Still can’t straighten the arm all the way, bruised all to hell. So, in a super great mood.
I may offer the insurance co a $1000 break on the settlement if they let me beat the shit out of the other driver.
#15107
On 8/30/2022 at 11:29 AM, General Specific said:


To add on, who are the fuck sticks that drive in the rain with hazards flashing? Fuck you mother fucker, get off the fucking road!

When it's a downpour with 20 foot visibility and there are fucking idiots with no lights on at all and still hauling ass, usually in some form of brodozer, ME.

I don't drive any slower than is necessary, but I don't want that fucking idiot in the brodozer to plow me over when his 34s hydroplane.

Edited by TwiceHorn

#15108
11 hours ago, Brisketexan said:


Pissed off that her arm’s in a sling, her car is gone, and she likely won’t get in to see an orthopedist before we leave town on Wednesday. Still can’t straighten the arm all the way, bruised all to hell. So, in a super great mood.
I may offer the insurance co a $1000 break on the settlement if they let me beat the shit out of the other driver.

What was his excuse for running the red?  Sun in his eyes? He had the green?  (It’s never their fault.)

#15109

The annual reorganization of all the products on the shelves at the grocery store so you don’t know where anything is anymore. They do this intentionally to break you from your habit of knowing what you want, where it is, and not browsing anything that you might purchase on impulse. And now they’re rearranging the store while at the same time they’re expanding parking space for “curbside delivery” orders. 

#15110

My biggest complaint at HEB is constantly having to jump out of the way of order pickers hauling ass through the aisles with their faces buried in their phones.  I'm thinking about letting the next one run me over and then suing them for big bucks.  Of course, then I'd be shopping at Randall's or Kroger.

#15111
7 hours ago, WhatTheBuck said:

The annual reorganization of all the products on the shelves at the grocery store so you don’t know where anything is anymore. They do this intentionally to break you from your habit of knowing what you want, where it is, and not browsing anything that you might purchase on impulse. And now they’re rearranging the store while at the same time they’re expanding parking space for “curbside delivery” orders. 

Annual my ass. Some reorganize monthly if not more often.   They've got to trick you into walking by more stuff you might be tempted to buy. 

On 8/27/2022 at 1:40 PM, T’Boo Ted Marshall said:

The rate at which grey nose hairs grow.

Same with freaking ear hair. 

#15112
1 hour ago, SHOOTER12 said:

Annual my ass. Some reorganize monthly if not more often.   They've got to trick you into walking by more stuff you might be tempted to buy. 

Same with freaking ear hair. 

I had to purchase a trimmer for such things a few years ago.  Made me feel old and surly.

#15113
3 hours ago, SHOOTER12 said:

Annual my ass. Some reorganize monthly if not more often.   They've got to trick you into walking by more stuff you might be tempted to buy. 

Same with freaking ear hair. 

Eyebrow hairs. What the hell?

#15114
6 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

My biggest complaint at HEB is constantly having to jump out of the way of order pickers hauling ass through the aisles with their faces buried in their phones.  I'm thinking about letting the next one run me over and then suing them for big bucks.  Of course, then I'd be shopping at Randall's or Kroger.

Sue for the store, fire the fucker with the phone attached to his face, and keep it open 24 hours.

#15115
9 hours ago, nnm said:

Eyebrow hairs. What the hell?

No shit.  Within 72 hours of trimming, mine look like some kind of organic barbed wire again.

#15116
9 hours ago, nnm said:

Eyebrow hairs. What the hell?

 

12 hours ago, SHOOTER12 said:

Same with freaking ear hair. 

 

I need to transplant my ear/eyebrow genes to the top of my head.

#15117
45 minutes ago, Cheeseweasel said:

 

 

I need to transplant my ear/eyebrow genes to the top of my head.

Great idea,  I think I'll try that. 

  • Author
#15118

my eye twitches when i see people call their non-stop flights "direct" 

Edited by elfenix

#15121
13 hours ago, elfenix said:

my eye twitches when i people call their non-stop flights "direct" 

Isn't that the meaning of direct? What I am I missing I?

  • Author
#15122
16 minutes ago, Cheeseweasel said:

Isn't that the meaning of direct? What I am I missing I?

direct means a fuel or passenger stop somewhere.  used to be more common before there were planes that could fly between any two airports in the world.  LAX <-> SIN was just at or beyond the range of a 747-400 so you'd usually stop in taipei, for example.  southwest still does them with some bus route type flights (tampa - baltimore - columbus - st louis - houston, iirc).   they'll say something like "welcome to phoenix, if you are continuing on to oakland, stay on the plane so we can get a head count."

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Direct_flight

Edited by elfenix

#15124
13 hours ago, elfenix said:

my eye twitches when i see people call their non-stop flights "direct" 

they are technically correct

all non-stop flights are direct

not all direct flights are non-stop

  • Author
#15125

wikipedia uses the word "may" include intermediate stops, but its source says a direct flight "makes stops along the way" which is a more imperative way of stating it. and most travel sites describe it as a flight that makes stop(s) along the way. 

Edited by elfenix

#15126

People who buy lifetime subscriptions. If you are over the age of 40, think all the technology, societal changes that have taken place. Now, Imagine if you had shelled out money for an AOL lifetime subscription.

#15127
People who buy lifetime subscriptions. If you are over the age of 40, think all the technology, societal changes that have taken place. Now, Imagine if you had shelled out money for an AOL lifetime subscription.

ShouldIHaveNotDoneThat.jpg
#15128
1 hour ago, Brothahorn said:

People who buy lifetime subscriptions. If you are over the age of 40, think all the technology, societal changes that have taken place. Now, Imagine if you had shelled out money for an AOL lifetime subscription.

This is actually an issue now with apps. I’ve bought several apps over the years that are no longer supported. So when you get a new device, you lose the app and all the data with it. 

#15129
3 hours ago, elfenix said:

wikipedia uses the word "may" include intermediate stops, but its source says a direct flight "makes stops along the way" which is a more imperative way of stating it. and most travel sites describe it as a flight that makes stop(s) along the way. 

If you pronounce “gif” with a hard “g” and not correctly with a soft “g” like “Jif” the peanut butter then I don’t recognize your quibbling over the difference between “direct” and “non-stop” flights and the meaning between the two.

But surely you have to agree that every non-stop flight is a direct flight, right?

#15130

A flight that makes a stop is only a direct flight if the stopping point is directly in line with the flight path from the origination to the final destination.  If it isn't then how can it be a direct flight?

#15131

One thing I know for sure is that you don’t want to fly Delta with a stop in Atlanta. And I’m not sure it’s possible to fly Delta without a stop in Atlanta. 

#15132
A flight that makes a stop is only a direct flight if the stopping point is directly in line with the flight path from the origination to the final destination.  If it isn't then how can it be a direct flight?

#15133
2 hours ago, Brothahorn said:

People who buy lifetime subscriptions. If you are over the age of 40, think all the technology, societal changes that have taken place. Now, Imagine if you had shelled out money for an AOL lifetime subscription.

Yeah, who needs the stories in Playboy or Hustler these days?

#15134
2 hours ago, Brothahorn said:

People who buy lifetime subscriptions. If you are over the age of 40, think all the technology, societal changes that have taken place. Now, Imagine if you had shelled out money for an AOL lifetime subscription.

Lifetime doesn't mean for the duration of YOUR life.  It means, for the duration of the life of the company selling it.

  • Author
#15135
1 hour ago, WhatTheBuck said:

If you pronounce “gif” with a hard “g” and not correctly with a soft “g” like “Jif” the peanut butter then I don’t recognize your quibbling over the difference between “direct” and “non-stop” flights and the meaning between the two.

But surely you have to agree that every non-stop flight is a direct flight, right?

it's the internet equivalent of sports mount rushmores

Edited by elfenix

#15137

A bunch of active wasp nests under my roof eaves. I sprayed at least 8 just now. My neighbor's house also has at least 3 that I can see.  I'm painting my house soon, and want to kill them before the painters power wash and get stung and sue me.

 

Also, we have an ant problem in the kitchen. We've been in the house for almost 7 years, and this is the first time we had ants, which is a miracle considering Irvine / Tustin is essentially built over an ant mound. It's been dry AF and hot AF. I guess it's the time of year when the ants get into houses looking for water and something to eat. I'll need to remember to spray around the house next August.

  • Popular Post
#15138

Napkin dispensers that are packed with too many napkins that you end up tearing them into tiny pieces as you try to get one out.

#15139
2 hours ago, mininghorn88 said:

Napkin dispensers that are packed with too many napkins that you end up tearing them into tiny pieces as you try to get one out.

And they’re usually really shitty, thin napkins. You have to push them in and then pull out a huge wad of them to avoid tearing them. And then each napkin is good for one wipe of your hands or mouth.

Assuming you’re talking about restaurants. Like a typical diner. The other thing is they have their pepper shakers so full that it’s actually hard to shake any pepper out. I unscrew the top to relieve some of the stress and pepper spills all over the place. It’s like they managed to force more pepper in there than the shaker was made to hold. How do they even do that? That’s on them, though. After I remove the excess pepper and replace the cap, it dispenses just fine. I’ll leave it to them to clean the pepper off the table. I suppose I could use one of their shitty thin napkins to collect that explosion of pepper. But fuck ‘em. I tip well. Let them deal with the mess. 

#15140
6 hours ago, WhatTheBuck said:

And they’re usually really shitty, thin napkins. You have to push them in and then pull out a huge wad of them to avoid tearing them. And then each napkin is good for one wipe of your hands or mouth.

Assuming you’re talking about restaurants. Like a typical diner. The other thing is they have their pepper shakers so full that it’s actually hard to shake any pepper out. I unscrew the top to relieve some of the stress and pepper spills all over the place. It’s like they managed to force more pepper in there than the shaker was made to hold. How do they even do that? That’s on them, though. After I remove the excess pepper and replace the cap, it dispenses just fine. I’ll leave it to them to clean the pepper off the table. I suppose I could use one of their shitty thin napkins to collect that explosion of pepper. But fuck ‘em. I tip well. Let them deal with the mess. 

The same store that sells mattress scales also sells pepper compactors. 

#15141
21 hours ago, Brothahorn said:

People who buy lifetime subscriptions. If you are over the age of 40, think all the technology, societal changes that have taken place. Now, Imagine if you had shelled out money for an AOL lifetime subscription.

My father and MIL still use AOL as their primary personal email.  The parents also still have, not one, but two landlines.  The second is a dedicated line for their fax machine.

Edited by conVINCEd

#15142
13 minutes ago, conVINCEd said:

My father and MIL still use AOL as their primary personal email.

My MIL too. It's fucking hilarious when she asks me a question related to her email. My answer is always "get a gmail account".

#15143
16 minutes ago, conVINCEd said:

My father and MIL still use AOL as their primary personal email.  The parents also still have, not one, but two landlines.  The second is a dedicated line for their fax machine.

I am happy to pay the $10 a month for a landline so that I never have to give out my cell number if I don't want to. I find a spam text or robocall to my cell far more annoying than the same thing on our home phone. 

#15144
Just now, Cheeseweasel said:

My MIL too. It's fucking hilarious when she asks me a question related to her email. My answer is always "get a gmail account".

The MIL has a PHD and her last job was President of a university system.  Not a dumb person, and didn’t lack exposure to technology.  I almost fell out of my chair when she fired up the laptop at the breakfast table and the first sound was “you’ve got mail”.

#15145
1 minute ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

I am happy to pay the $10 a month for a landline so that I never have to give out my cell number if I don't want to. I find a spam text or robocall to my cell far more annoying than the same thing on our home phone. 

Do you have a second landline dedicated to your fax machine?

#15146
I am happy to pay the $10 a month for a landline so that I never have to give out my cell number if I don't want to. I find a spam text or robocall to my cell far more annoying than the same thing on our home phone. 

Got rid of the land line many many years ago. But if any establishment wants a number, they get the old land line. I walk off laughing to myself (in my head in Mr. Ts voice, I pity the fool), every single time.
#15148
Lifetime doesn't mean for the duration of YOUR life.  It means, for the duration of the life of the company selling it.
Yes. Which is why it doesn't make any sense to buy a lifetime subscription to something that can be shutdown easily. Like apps or filesharing services, especially.

Megaupload still hasn't processed my refund.

#15149
1 hour ago, Brothahorn said:

Yes. Which is why it doesn't make any sense to buy a lifetime subscription to something that can be shutdown easily. Like apps or filesharing services, especially.

Megaupload still hasn't processed my refund.
 

And while we're at it, I've had it with "limited editions" of anything. 

There are finite amounts of every single resource on this entire planet, so there is nothing that isn't a limited edition. In other words, there are no "unlimited editions" of anything. 

#15150

Seinfeld routines jumping outta the lifetime/ unlimited discussion

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...
Football ... Basketball ... Baseball ... Other Sports ... Futbol ... 🤫995🤫 ... Gambling ... Movies & TV ... Music ... Hobbies ... Lulz ... Food & Travel ... Daily Texan ... Business & Markets ... Cloak Room ... Help ... For Sale ... Board Discussion ... Advertise... Tailgate Donations

Configure browser push notifications

Chrome (Android)
  1. Tap the lock icon next to the address bar.
  2. Tap Permissions → Notifications.
  3. Adjust your preference.
Chrome (Desktop)
  1. Click the padlock icon in the address bar.
  2. Select Site settings.
  3. Find Notifications and adjust your preference.