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  • Scheiss Meister
    Scheiss Meister

    The day I retired I set an auto reply that said something like "As of EOB today I will be retired.  If you expect me to reply to an email after 10:00 am today, you will be disappointed."  At the 3:00

  • Ghost of NMAS
    Ghost of NMAS

    I hate the people that ignore it when they have the right of way and try to wave me through first, it just fucks up the system and delays everyone

Posted Images

My $328 gas bill. We replaced the windows 3 years ago, and keep the house at 68 degrees. Granted it’s been in the low 40s for most of the past month (cold by SoCal standards), but this ain’t right. 
Not trivial at all.e75bcbe3c311859b905f72e30cc3f5ce.gif
  • Author
8 hours ago, deadshank said:

Sits in truck 

Makes phone call

Blocks diesel pump (other diesel pumps don’t work)

Does not care about others 

Finally gets out to pump gasoline

Runs credit card

Credit card doesn’t work

Pays cash ($5)

Gets in truck

Finishes phone call

I honk

He gets irate

I’m the bad guy 

 

D20E3DCD-398C-4424-8099-0117C9B32768.jpeg

costco gas across the street was almost certainly worse (tho no diesel)

Sits in truck 
Makes phone call
Blocks diesel pump (other diesel pumps don’t work)
Does not care about others 
Finally gets out to pump gasoline
Runs credit card
Credit card doesn’t work
Pays cash ($5)
Gets in truck
Finishes phone call
I honk
He gets irate
I’m the bad guy 
 
D20E3DCD-398C-4424-8099-0117C9B32768.thumb.jpeg.fe7caedeeb01c413c1b3a98fbd7a0d03.jpeg
I'm not saying you should fire a few warning shots, but I would understand.

A few days ago I got a phishing email that slipped into my inbox.  The usual shit that says I forgot to pay my invoice for the Apple iPhone I ordered and just follow the link below to review and pay the invoice.  I just reported it as phishing and moved on. Well, apparently they sent it out to a whole shit load of technologically impaired old people and for the last three days I’ve been getting emails from people that replied all saying they didn’t order an iPhone. Fuck scammers and old people

On 1/26/2023 at 11:27 AM, Brothahorn said:

$1.50 child safety fund fee on my vehicle registration. What the hell is this? And why is it on vehicle registrations?

To pay for people who won't look in their back seats?

  • Popular Post

Probably already been said, but calling customer service and being asked to verify name, address, account number, whatever else before being connected to a person who then asks me to verify name, address, account number, whatever else only to be told I need to be transferred and then having to verify my name, address, account number, whatever else yet again. Round and round we go.

Probably already been said, but calling customer service and being asked to verify name, address, account number, whatever else before being connected to a person who then asks me to verify name, address, account number, whatever else only to be told I need to be transferred and then having to verify my name, address, account number, whatever else yet again. Round and round we go.

Makes me want to make everyone involved in creating that system have to go through it. Then I stab them all.

Pregnant pictures.

A young cousin and his girl are having a baby. This mitch just posted pictures of her big ass stomach uncovered and him standing there looking like a damn fool. When the hell did this become a thing? Why is this a thing? I would never allow my kids mom to do some shit like that.

Pregnant pictures.

A young cousin and his girl are having a baby. This mitch just posted pictures of her big ass stomach uncovered and him standing there looking like a damn fool. When the hell did this become a thing? Why is this a thing? I would never allow my kids mom to do some shit like that.

This Surly! You must show your work to receive any credit!
2 minutes ago, General Specific said:


This Surly! You must show your work to receive any credit!

I won't judge your fetish but you don't want to see her. Plus I don't want my family embarrassed. He's already pissy because the family, including his momma, is clowning his ass. 

 

Imagine this after 3 kids already

image.png.767bc0f15e67fc6676f99c65a3747822.png

12 hours ago, closetohumping said:

Multiple tshirt tags.  Put on a tshirt that had like 4 tags, one a 3 incher sticking me in the side.  Thought it was my Uncle Lou.  Wait what?

Are you Rocko? You're supposed to remove the tags.

18 hours ago, closetohumping said:

Multiple tshirt tags.  Put on a tshirt that had like 4 tags, one a 3 incher sticking me in the side.  Thought it was my Uncle Lou.  Wait what?

Some garments and products of mine have like 20 tags stacked one atop another, like in 10 different languages and shit. 
 

If people want to help eliminate waste, theres one

Work tables with walled legs and slide-out keyboard trays might be the worst furniture design in the history of furniture design0D1BD723-F199-47CD-BDF3-0972727DFDA6.thumb.jpeg.db78a50150546b94b88e46d4899f3890.jpeg

719DEA3A-5B01-4952-A462-43D948589518.jpeg

4 hours ago, 52-80 said:

Work tables with walled legs and slide-out keyboard trays might be the worst furniture design in the history of furniture design0D1BD723-F199-47CD-BDF3-0972727DFDA6.thumb.jpeg.db78a50150546b94b88e46d4899f3890.jpeg

 

The needlessly restrictive foot area is also a deal-breaking design flaw. 

Whoever purchased any of that furniture should be thrown through that window, followed shortly by the furniture itself. 

1 hour ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

Whoever purchased any of that furniture should be thrown through that window, followed shortly by the furniture itself.

Looks like one of those bullshit tilt windows. You can't throw anything out of them.

54 minutes ago, Cheeseweasel said:

Looks like one of those bullshit tilt windows. You can't throw anything out of them.

Then don't bother opening it before tossing the furniture. Simple solution to two problems! 

On 1/29/2023 at 1:12 PM, General Specific said:

The people who drive around on trash day picking up thrown out items.

My neighbor and I have a paved section between our driveways, inside sidewalk, for a nice 8x8. It’s perfect, with a bench, two tables, a foot rest and two chairs. We, and other neighbors use it as a gathering place to catch up and enjoy our libations.

Anyhow, came out trash day morning and those chairs, one table and foot rest are gone. Been there for almost 10 years. Fuck you, trashy ass people!

That’s probably not the junk collector dudes.  That sounds more like straight up theft.

Paid extra money for “express” shipping to get ice skates in just for this weekend. 
 

Theyre arriving Monday and im busy all week. 

38 minutes ago, 52-80 said:

Paid extra money for “express” shipping to get ice skates in just for this weekend. 
 

Theyre arriving Monday and im busy all week. 

We are members of several wine clubs which ship periodically through the year. We now live way out in the sticks in ETX. The deliveries require signature, which means that one of us must be stay at the house all day on the delivery days, waiting for FedEx/ups/USPS guy to show. I think I’m done with that nonsense. 

8 minutes ago, nnm said:

We are members of several wine clubs which ship periodically through the year. We now live way out in the sticks in ETX. The deliveries require signature, which means that one of us must be stay at the house all day on the delivery days, waiting for FedEx/ups/USPS guy to show. I think I’m done with that nonsense. 

When robot butler

10-best-television-robots.jpg

The fact that the Superbowl insists on using roman numerals in its name. 
 

Motherfucker I aint trying to translate numbers when you tell me michael jackson performed at SB XXVII. 
 

In fact, drop the number, just use the calendar year. Who the fuck knows when 27 was?

5 hours ago, 52-80 said:

The fact that the Superbowl insists on using roman numerals in its name. 
 

Motherfucker I aint trying to translate numbers when you tell me michael jackson performed at SB XXVII. 
 

In fact, drop the number, just use the calendar year. Who the fuck knows when 27 was?

Username kinda checks out.

Motherfuckers who use hotel room alarm clocks but don't make sure to turn them off before checking out, and the housekeepers who don't check for that when making up the room. 

19 minutes ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

Motherfuckers who use hotel room alarm clocks but don't make sure to turn them off before checking out, and the housekeepers who don't check for that when making up the room. 

Legitimately don’t remember the last time I’ve seen an alarm clock in a hotel so any budget. Sometime before covid I’m convinced they were all yanked and disposed

The fact that the Superbowl insists on using roman numerals in its name. 
 
Motherfucker I aint trying to translate numbers when you tell me michael jackson performed at SB XXVII. 
 
In fact, drop the number, just use the calendar year. Who the fuck knows when 27 was?

Jan 1993. Cowboys 52-Bills 17. Might be a Cowboys fan.
6 minutes ago, Fudbelty said:


Jan 1993. Cowboys 52-Bills 17. Might be a Cowboys fan.

SB29. 
49ers put 49 on the chargers with jerry rice catching 3TD but steve gets the mvp. 
‘94 season. That’s my reference but damn i hate to do the math to figure out the year for other SBs. 

9 hours ago, 52-80 said:

The fact that the Superbowl insists on using roman numerals in its name. 
 

Motherfucker I aint trying to translate numbers when you tell me michael jackson performed at SB XXVII. 
 

In fact, drop the number, just use the calendar year. Who the fuck knows when 27 was?

They stopped for one year, for SB 50, because they didn't want to have a big "L" by itself on the uniform. They should have used that as the pivot to regular numbers from then on. But no, let's cling to the past. 

On 2/16/2023 at 8:27 AM, closetohumping said:

Neighborhood wives sneaking a peek at my junk when I'm in grey sweat pants.  I'm a grower not a shower!!

Grey in England. 
Gray in America. 
Do you sip tea whilst watching footballers?

On 2/10/2023 at 7:08 AM, nnm said:

We are members of several wine clubs which ship periodically through the year. We now live way out in the sticks in ETX. The deliveries require signature, which means that one of us must be stay at the house all day on the delivery days, waiting for FedEx/ups/USPS guy to show. I think I’m done with that nonsense. 

Have it shipped to a local UPS store.  They sign for you and you pick it up on your way home.

ESPN perpetually focusing their website on Tiger Woods when he's 10 shots back, at best, nearly every tournament. Every day it's a new front page update only on him. I don't even follow golf, but it irks me. Focus on the players winning. I guess it's similar to the New York/LA/Boston teams bias.

On 2/16/2023 at 8:27 AM, closetohumping said:

Neighborhood wives sneaking a peek at my junk when I'm in grey sweat pants.  I'm a grower not a shower!!

OK,  whatever you say dinky.

ESPN perpetually focusing their website on Tiger Woods when he's 10 shots back, at best, nearly every tournament. Every day it's a new front page update only on him. I don't even follow golf, but it irks me. Focus on the players winning. I guess it's similar to the New York/LA/Boston teams bias.

Any link to lebrons thoughts of tiger being 10 strokes back?
11 minutes ago, MNLonghornFUKM said:


Any link to lebrons thoughts of tiger being 10 strokes back?

Amen.

4 hours ago, gofuckyourself said:

ESPN perpetually focusing their website on Tiger Woods when he's 10 shots back, at best, nearly every tournament. Every day it's a new front page update only on him. I don't even follow golf, but it irks me. Focus on the players winning. I guess it's similar to the New York/LA/Boston teams bias.

It’s a ratings-driven business. Tiger attracts viewers. 

On 2/7/2023 at 5:51 AM, 52-80 said:

Work tables with walled legs and slide-out keyboard trays might be the worst furniture design in the history of furniture design0D1BD723-F199-47CD-BDF3-0972727DFDA6.thumb.jpeg.db78a50150546b94b88e46d4899f3890.jpeg

719DEA3A-5B01-4952-A462-43D948589518.jpeg

Without the restrictive piece by your feet there would no strength in the desk.  So, mount it in a vertical position between the two legs.  Thus, creating foot room and retaining the strength of the desk.  Can't help with the window.

Edited by Bevo&Pevo

On 2/16/2023 at 7:27 AM, closetohumping said:

Neighborhood wives sneaking a peek at my junk when I'm in grey sweat pants.  I'm a grower not a shower!!

Decides Terrence Howard GIF

Had really well-rated moving company come and transfer all our shit across town today. 

The young workers were nice enough, but im discovering now a bunch of our furniture got minor scratches and damage, and some small shit like retaining clips for bookshelves got lost. 

What am I gonna do? call the company and demand $5 for each scratch? Make them search and replace small clips and pins? Fuck no thats petty…..but damn its annoying as hell. 

Took a work personality/ style test that came back with the feedback:  May be more focused on solutions than people's feelings.

Yeah, feelings don't keep the lights on...

7 hours ago, slorch said:

Took a work personality/ style test that came back with the feedback:  May be more focused on solutions than people's feelings.

Yeah, feelings don't keep the lights on...

It's Not About the Nail (Short 2013) - IMDb

Calculus is difficult. Getting people to understand an intersection with blinking red lights / blinking yellow lights if fucking impossible.

Stop stopping at the fucking blinking yellow and waving everyone thru like you are a fucking traffic cop. You are only making it worse.

Calculus is difficult. Getting people to understand an intersection with blinking red lights / blinking yellow lights if fucking impossible.
Stop stopping at the fucking blinking yellow and waving everyone thru like you are a fucking traffic cop. You are only making it worse.
4 way stops. Either no one wants to go or everyone wants to go at once. People have zero idea how these work.
On 2/16/2023 at 8:37 AM, Prepuce of Doom said:

Motherfuckers who use hotel room alarm clocks but don't make sure to turn them off before checking out, and the housekeepers who don't check for that when making up the room. 

That's funny.  I'm going to start doing that when I check out of hotels.  4am sounds good?  yeah, 4 am.

We are members of several wine clubs which ship periodically through the year. We now live way out in the sticks in ETX. The deliveries require signature, which means that one of us must be stay at the house all day on the delivery days, waiting for FedEx/ups/USPS guy to show. I think I’m done with that nonsense. 
Certain deliveries with UPS can be re-routed to CVS/Walgreens/UPS stores or left with neighbors.
1 hour ago, Elvis said:

That's funny.  I'm going to start doing that when I check out of hotels.  4am sounds good?  yeah, 4 am.

Animated GIF

On 2/16/2023 at 8:37 AM, Prepuce of Doom said:

Motherfuckers who use hotel room alarm clocks but don't make sure to turn them off before checking out, and the housekeepers who don't check for that when making up the room. 

Virtually everyone has a cellphone, upon which they program personal alarms.  Not sure why alarm clocks are even needed any more, but regardless, just unplug the motherfuckers. I usually do it from the jump just to have another outlet.

 

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