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Featured Replies

2 minutes ago, NAVY said:

You savage. Doing shots Friday morning instead of afternoon? 

Upper management potential 

No.  I just see through the bullshit.

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  • Scheiss Meister
    Scheiss Meister

    The day I retired I set an auto reply that said something like "As of EOB today I will be retired.  If you expect me to reply to an email after 10:00 am today, you will be disappointed."  At the 3:00

  • Ghost of NMAS
    Ghost of NMAS

    I hate the people that ignore it when they have the right of way and try to wave me through first, it just fucks up the system and delays everyone

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So you don’t like drinking for free, on the company’s time? Okay. 

28 minutes ago, Superhero said:

So you don’t like drinking for free, on the company’s time? Okay. 

Not on a mid-Friday afternoon at work. At a bar? Perhaps.

9 hours ago, Superhero said:

I schedule my staff meetings every other Friday at 3PM.

brad-pitt-fury-movie-shoot-that-guy.gif

 

5a23140d86dab35eea61f97ef244897d.jpg
Passed by the poor bastard who was broke down on my way to lunch and snapped this on the way back. Drivers have zero clue that hazards usually mean this vehicle isn’t moving. Same thing happened when I was next to him..5 cars pulled right behind him. All of us in the other lane next to him proceed and I know I’m at least a qtr mile up until somebody behind him makes a move.

On 1/18/2025 at 5:47 AM, Iceman said:

In a public place, people who walk( half speed or less) while reading their phone. 
 

Have some gotdam awareness/ decency and step to the side.  GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE WAY!!!!

 

Worse if they are coming at you on the wrong side of the sidewalk/hallway/whatever. 

1 minute ago, High Plains Drifter said:

 

Worse if they are coming at you on the wrong side of the sidewalk/hallway/whatever. 

I love it. Shoulder checking the fuck out of people who deserve it is good therapy. 

I think phone slap should become a game we play...

I've been having seizure symptoms for the past hour or so. It's 10:48, I'm off to bed. Hope I'll be better tomorrow.

I got to make a run to Walgreens this morning for some eye allergy potion.  Wife was miserable, and no, I didn't shoot anything in her face.

Super-  hope you got some sleep.

6 hours ago, Superhero said:

I've been having seizure symptoms for the past hour or so. It's 10:48, I'm off to bed. Hope I'll be better tomorrow.

Better? Or headed to doc?

Better. Haven’t had a seizure in almost a year. Ironic since I just had a doctor appointment and told her I’m doing great, can we lower the dosage. 

  • Author

PXL_20250124_181059256_MP2.thumb.jpg.0203a67e168250425b500881d88f6d66.jpg

Edited by elfenix

On 1/21/2025 at 10:21 PM, High Plains Drifter said:

 

Worse if they are coming at you on the wrong side of the sidewalk/hallway/whatever. 

Or weaving back and forth while they do it

  • Author
37 minutes ago, PvilleStang said:

Jason's Deli makes you surly?  Or sandwich trays?

Jason's Deli sandwich trays make me surly. There's a whole thread about them around here somewhere. @Brisketexan knows

1 minute ago, elfenix said:

Jason's Deli sandwich trays make me surly. There's a whole thread about them around here somewhere. @Brisketexan knows

Fuck yes I do.

Jason's has precisely ONE noteworthy sandwich: their muffaletta.

What is the ONE sandwich you can't get on a sandwich tray from Jason's?  A motherfucking muffaletta.

FFS, it's as if Pizza Hut allowed you to order takeout, but pizza was not allowed to be part of your order.

1 minute ago, Brisketexan said:

Fuck yes I do.

Jason's has precisely ONE noteworthy sandwich: their muffaletta.

What is the ONE sandwich you can't get on a sandwich tray from Jason's?  A motherfucking muffaletta.

FFS, it's as if Pizza Hut allowed you to order takeout, but pizza was not allowed to be part of your order.

I went to a Chipotle in Webster, Tx about 10 years ago.  They were out of tortillas.  What’s the point of a burrito joint with no tortillas?!?

8 minutes ago, nnm said:

I went to a Chipotle in Webster, Tx about 10 years ago.  They were out of tortillas.  What’s the point of a burrito joint with no tortillas?!?

Oh....wait till @Bozo_Casanova tells you the story of the time we went to the Texas Chili Parlor and they were out of.....chili.

21 minutes ago, Brisketexan said:

Oh....wait till @Bozo_Casanova tells you the story of the time we went to the Texas Chili Parlor and they were out of.....chili.

They had “white chili” though, whatever that is…

That's the most chaotic sandwich tray.  Did they seal it and then shake it around a few times? 

3 hours ago, Brisketexan said:

Oh....wait till @Bozo_Casanova tells you the story of the time we went to the Texas Chili Parlor and they were out of.....chili.

I went to a McDonalds in the Bahamas, and they ran out of patties.

2 hours ago, Bozo_Casanova said:

They had “white chili” though, whatever that is…

Communism.  Individual bowls of communism, that's what that is.

23 minutes ago, Brisketexan said:

Communism.  Individual bowls of communism, that's what that is.

They served Trotsky a bowl the night he died. When Natalia asked him how it was, he said

“Думаю, это нормально, но это не настоящий перец чили.”

  • Author

there's a UPS truck parked outside. each time its hazards blink it also beeps. would it be wrong of me to go down and beat it with a wrench until the beeps stop?

4 hours ago, elfenix said:

there's a UPS truck parked outside. each time its hazards blink it also beeps. would it be wrong of me to go down and beat it with a wrench until the beeps stop?

Just shoot the driver then blame it on your local immigrant demographic.

5 hours ago, elfenix said:

there's a UPS truck parked outside. each time its hazards blink it also beeps. would it be wrong of me to go down and beat it with a wrench until the beeps stop?

Driver pops his head out, "Nah dude.  Hit it right here( on the dash) for both of us."

  • Author

If you're going to make an illegal right from the second lane the least you could do is turn into the furthest lane to the left

2 hours ago, elfenix said:

If you're going to make an illegal right from the second lane the least you could do is turn into the furthest lane to the left

Must’ve been someone else because my wife’s been home all day. 

19 minutes ago, Superhero said:

Must’ve been someone else because my wife’s been home all day. 

We’re not into stereotyping around here, but ….

Had a nine-item order at Amazon. Deliberately pushed delivery to today for “fewer packages.”

The result? Six separate packages. 

Edited by TheStoicPaisano

39 minutes ago, TheStoicPaisano said:

Had a nine-item order at Amazon. Deliberately pushed delivery to today for “fewer packages.”

The result? Six separate packages. 

When are the other three packages suppose to show up?

  • Author
47 minutes ago, TheStoicPaisano said:

Had a nine-item order at Amazon. Deliberately pushed delivery to today for “fewer packages.”

The result? Six separate packages. 

Nice

On 1/24/2025 at 3:18 PM, elfenix said:

Jason's Deli sandwich trays make me surly.

Especially if they’re 12 years old. 

6 hours ago, NorthLoop said:

Six is less than nine. 

 

Fucking CenterPoint.  Not only can they not maintain Houston's power grid, but apparently, nobody at the fucking company knows how to shut a fucking gate.  For the third time in two months, they accessed my property without notice or permission and failed to shut the gate when they left.  As a result, when I get home and let the dogs out I end up needing to round them up from the neighborhood.  I have now put a fucking padlock on the gate.

On 1/20/2025 at 9:30 PM, Iceman said:

I would never look forward to your meeting.  Do it at 8 that morning.

or...
 

my great results are going to have to suffice in my absence.  

 

There is zero reason for a 3PM meeting on Fridays...except...  stupid ass roll-call.

Probably depends on the job. We have a team of about 20 sales guys. We sale to schools. Our weekly meeting is at 4 on Friday afternoons. Most convenient time for most of us.

But, the rest of our schedule is completely up to us. If I need to take a day to do billing or paperwork, I just stay home and do it. 

On 1/15/2025 at 8:51 PM, Js1 said:

Bring back the gd peanuts 

I flew Aeromexico last week. Peanuts were served. They were delicious.

MS Copilot can suck my ass. I hate that shit. All AI in my business can fuck the right off.

I know how to write a fucking sentence. Stop trying to finish it for me. And you are usually wrong. I hope AI is reading this and feels bad

 

 

10 hours ago, InkaUtexas said:

MS Copilot can suck my ass. I hate that shit. All AI in my business can fuck the right off.

I know how to write a fucking sentence. Stop trying to finish it for me. And you are usually wrong. I hope AI is reading this and feels bad

 

 

You just made the list, buddy. 
take-notes-480-x-480-gif-56kf9mdyrf5hbms

13 hours ago, InkaUtexas said:

MS Copilot can suck my ass. I hate that shit. All AI in my business can fuck the right off.

I know how to write a fucking sentence. Stop trying to finish it for me. And you are usually wrong. I hope AI is reading this and feels bad

 

 

 

You better start welcoming our new AI overlords. 

 

 

2 hours ago, High Plains Drifter said:

 

You better start welcoming our new AI overlords. 

 

 

They won't ever find my on my coconut farm.

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