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  • Scheiss Meister
    Scheiss Meister

    The day I retired I set an auto reply that said something like "As of EOB today I will be retired.  If you expect me to reply to an email after 10:00 am today, you will be disappointed."  At the 3:00

  • Ghost of NMAS
    Ghost of NMAS

    I hate the people that ignore it when they have the right of way and try to wave me through first, it just fucks up the system and delays everyone

Posted Images

1 hour ago, Jersey Man10 said:

I fucking hate the smell of diesel trucks.

fifm

People who walk across lanes of traffic in a parking lot diagonally instead of straight across.

1 hour ago, mushroomface said:

People who walk across lanes of traffic in a parking lot diagonally instead of straight across.

What if you're driving northward and they walk toward the southwest instead of due west in order to avoid cutting you off?

When someone quotes a post and immediately underneath writes, "This."

No shit, we kind of figured that out when you quoted the post.

Just now, Fudge Nuggets said:

When someone quotes a post and immediately underneath writes, "This."

No shit, we kind of figured that out when you quoted the post.

That 

When someone quotes a post and immediately underneath writes, "This."

No shit, we kind of figured that out when you quoted the post.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This

Not trivial but shingles suck something fierce. 

4 hours ago, Fudge Nuggets said:

When someone quotes a post and immediately underneath writes, "This."

No shit, we kind of figured that out when you quoted the post.

Esto

Should just call it The Suck. 

 

BOT:  Stores with Halloween candy out already, some since last month. 

Dude, it's Pumpkin Spice Latte Season already! Get your PSL even though it's 90 degrees out. 

On 8/31/2018 at 12:16 AM, Llogg said:

Nothing wrong with Windows 10.

I never use it, but I would. They have Windows 7 at work b/c IT is too busy fucking up EPIC upgrades to worry about insecure desktop operating systems.

You've just narrowed it down to every healthcare entity in the U.S.

1 hour ago, Underdog said:

Should just call it The Suck. 

 

BOT:  Stores with Halloween candy out already, some since last month. 

I drove past a house yesterday that had pumpkins and scarecrows out front. And a friend  posted a picture of their Halloween wreath. 

All I know is yoga pants are out in full effect in Austin even though it's still very much summer dress/shorts season...but for some reason I am totally okay with it.

Except you woman on Congress & 7th this morning in stunning yoga pants with the revealing mesh throughout.  With your shirt front tucked in and the back dangling all the way down to just above your knees.  This is not 1997.  While we enjoy your camel toe...those pants are about the ass.  And from the looks of it, you had a nice one.  But you decided the fucking H&M psuedo-bathrobe look over your backside was more flattering than just letting the sunshine of your buttocks get out there for the traffic cams to enjoy.  Be yourself.  Get it out there.  Life is yours for the taking.  I don't know what happened to you in leggings school, but it's not your fault.

Not trivial but shingles suck something fierce. 

I had it recently. It really sucks when it’s ass/crotch shingles. There’s a new vaccine that is more effective and it’s recommended for people over 50. The old one was recommended for people over 60.
On 8/28/2018 at 4:48 PM, Cheeseweasel said:

I continue to catch my belt loop on those fucking door handles like this:

 

4376P_P&$prodImageMedium$

 

Dang cheese, are you dry humping the door, or just have giant loose belt loops?

On 8/30/2018 at 9:10 AM, Litig8r said:

When you email a document in an editable format like, WORD, and somebody with WORD, sends back an email requesting you make "the following changes" to the fucking document, rather than just fucking doing it.  The first way always ends up, with "you didn't change it the way I wanted it changed"...

 

...or when someone sends you an email with a locked pdf document and asks you to make changes..arrrgggghhhh

10 minutes ago, SHOOTER12 said:

 

Dang cheese, are you dry humping the door, or just have giant loose belt loops?

Yes.

On 9/1/2018 at 8:45 PM, Knoxtnhorn said:

I was already not in the mood and then...

SIL comes home from work during the last 10 mins of the Penn St game and proceeds to yap for 45 godamn straight minutes.  She's staying with us for a few weeks until she can get into the house she closed on last week.  I've told my wife that she needs to talk to her about this.  Every, single fucking time I get a couple of minutes alone with my wife to watch one of our shows or somesuch, here comes gdamn SIL to yap about a bunch of stupid shit.  Every.  Fucking.  Time.  

Bet she can't talk with her mouth full.

On ‎9‎/‎5‎/‎2018 at 11:30 AM, Jersey Man10 said:

I fucking hate the sound of diesel trucks idling.

I must be getting old, it seems like every pickup on the road, gasoline or diesel, has an exhaust system that is just loud as fuck. Meanwhile auto engine noise and exhaust systems have gotten so quiet that I don't even realize that they're running sometimes. Brb, got a cloud to yell at.

  • Author
1 hour ago, El Diablo said:

I must be getting old, it seems like every pickup on the road, gasoline or diesel, has an exhaust system that is just loud as fuck. Meanwhile auto engine noise and exhaust systems have gotten so quiet that I don't even realize that they're running sometimes. Brb, got a cloud to yell at.

trucks are especially bad about making a shit ton of noise and getting no where.  almost as bad as the ricers and their crappy civics. 

5 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

I’m waiting for my first Christmas shit sighting. I expect it any day now.

Already fucking seen it on TV

Still disappointed that we still don’t know who was behind the Max Headroom Broadcast Intrusion.  One of the greatest pranks of all time.

People who don't enter a turn lane at the beginning, instead they cut across right up to the front while slowing down and blocking the through lane. Get the fuck out of the way.

And the opposite of that - people who sit at an intersection waiting for through traffic before they turn when they have a quarter mile of their own lane in which to get up to speed before merging.

Dots to separate a phone number.  Early on, this precluded you from clicking on the number on your phone to make a call.  Not a problem now, but still hate it for no good reason.

37 minutes ago, DCLonghorn said:

Dots to separate a phone number.  Early on, this precluded you from clicking on the number on your phone to make a call.  Not a problem now, but still hate it for no good reason.

FWIW, it helps me to read the separation in the numbers. Maybe I'm retarded.

Edited by Cheeseweasel

Waiting on a package to be delivered that was at the FedEx hub 15 miles away from my house on Wednesday only to see it travel 2,000 miles out of the way to Denver and back over the past two days.

23 hours ago, HouTex said:


I had it recently. It really sucks when it’s ass/crotch shingles. There’s a new vaccine that is more effective and it’s recommended for people over 50. The old one was recommended for people over 60.

That would be herpes. And the new vaccine is Shingrix. And yes, it’s good but it’s not for herpes.

Edited by Newdoc

Password validators that force you to make a less-secure password.

Oh, you mean I can't use certain characters in my password? Lovely! I'll make sure I only use easily-guessable dictionary words for storing my banking information with you, you miserable fucks.

21 minutes ago, Newdoc said:

That would be herpes. And the new vaccine is Shingrix. And yes, it’s good but it’s not for herpes.

It might be genital herpes in some cases, but not mine.  This is TMI, but my rash started on the left side of the top of my ass at my lower back and continued around my ass on the left side and ended at the scrotum.  Dr. took one look at it and immediately said it was shingles.  I had other classic symptoms of shingles as well.  This is from the mayoclinic.org site:

"Varicella-zoster is part of a group of viruses called herpes viruses, which includes the viruses that cause cold sores and genital herpes. Because of this, shingles is also known as herpes zoster. But the virus that causes chickenpox and shingles is not the same virus responsible for cold sores or genital herpes, a sexually transmitted infection."

1 hour ago, Rimbo said:

Password validators that force you to make a less-secure password.

Oh, you mean I can't use certain characters in my password? Lovely! I'll make sure I only use easily-guessable dictionary words for storing my banking information with you, you miserable fucks.

These are the same shitheads that force you to choose an opinion-based password reset/verification question and answer. 

I'm an adult. I don't have a favorite color. Or a single favorite food.

Or the questions you have to choose from are so meaninglessly broad and/or stupid that you couldn't ever possibly answer it the same way after significant passage of time. One of the most terrible questions I've seen was "Who did you look up to as a child?"

And I understand that these sorts of things can't be looked up, theoretically making them more secure, but many of them sure as shit can't be consistently reproduced, either. 

Edited by Prepuce of Doom

I started out with soreness on my left side, ribs and back, thought maybe I had pulled something after yard work.  The pain got progressively worse and I began to think maybe my pancreatitis was flaring up, had to endure it during the boy's wedding, didn't notice the rash until the day before work.  Both the pain and rash became worse and ended up going to Urgent Care after work on Labor Day, PA thought we caught it early enough to prevent it from getting worse.  Some Prednisone, Lidocane and some Val-bullshit have helped immensely.  Have an appt with GP later this month and will get the Vaccine.  Still a little rough when driving/riding in car and hitting bumps pain wise. 

12 minutes ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

These are the same shitheads that force you to choose an opinion-based password reset/verification question and answer. 

I'm an adult. I don't have a favorite color. Or a single favorite food.

Or the questions you have to choose from are so meaninglessly broad and/or stupid that you couldn't ever possibly answer it the same way after significant passage of time. One of the most terrible questions I've seen was "Who did you look up to as a child?"

And I understand that these sorts of things can't be looked up, theoretically making them more secure, but many of them sure as shit can't be consistently reproduced, either. 

Or "who was your favorite teacher?"

I remember different things on a day to day basis.  I may remember the name today, but in a week I'll draw a complete blank.  Yes, I'm old.

1 minute ago, You don't know me said:

Or "who was your favorite teacher?"

I remember different things on a day to day basis.  I may remember the name today, but in a week I'll draw a complete blank.  Yes, I'm old.

What was your favorite teacher's first pet's favorite color?

You just have to come up with a system.  If the question asks for a name, be it favorite actor, teacher, or whoever, just have one name that you use.

2 minutes ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

You just have to come up with a system.  If the question asks for a name, be it favorite actor, teacher, or whoever, just have one name that you use.

It's a stripper name, isn't it.

1 hour ago, HouTex said:

It might be genital herpes in some cases, but not mine.  This is TMI, but my rash started on the left side of the top of my ass at my lower back and continued around my ass on the left side and ended at the scrotum.  Dr. took one look at it and immediately said it was shingles.  I had other classic symptoms of shingles as well.  This is from the mayoclinic.org site:

"Varicella-zoster is part of a group of viruses called herpes viruses, which includes the viruses that cause cold sores and genital herpes. Because of this, shingles is also known as herpes zoster. But the virus that causes chickenpox and shingles is not the same virus responsible for cold sores or genital herpes, a sexually transmitted infection."

Just giving you grief. Actually, patients and doctors do mix them up when the rash is in the nether regions. One can get a viral culture if confusing.

17 minutes ago, Newdoc said:

Just giving you grief. Actually, patients and doctors do mix them up when the rash is in the nether regions. One can get a viral culture if confusing.

Unless I got the immaculate version of herpes . . .  Thirty years married to the same woman with no extramarital sex and I've never had a rash on my ass before.  In any event, the doctor was sure of his diagnosis.

And let the jokes fly that my wife is screwing someone else . . .

You conveniently left out the extramarital blow jobs.

  • Author
1 hour ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

These are the same shitheads that force you to choose an opinion-based password reset/verification question and answer. 

I'm an adult. I don't have a favorite color. Or a single favorite food.

Or the questions you have to choose from are so meaninglessly broad and/or stupid that you couldn't ever possibly answer it the same way after significant passage of time. One of the most terrible questions I've seen was "Who did you look up to as a child?"

And I understand that these sorts of things can't be looked up, theoretically making them more secure, but many of them sure as shit can't be consistently reproduced, either. 

for actual security you shouldn't be answering those questions.  instead you should use a nonsense phrase that you know and won't forget.  like a password, but much longer (and without stupid rules like needing a special character). 

55 minutes ago, Pogo said:

You conveniently left out the extramarital blow jobs.

Are there any other kind?

2 hours ago, You don't know me said:

Or "who was your favorite teacher?"

I remember different things on a day to day basis.  I may remember the name today, but in a week I'll draw a complete blank.  Yes, I'm old.

As old as I am I still remember my third grade teacher who was smoking hot and married to the UT place kicker.

Mrs. Crosby was married to Tony who kicked for the 1963 National Champions and was unique because he kicked barefoot straight on.

Would lift his toes and hit the ball with the ball of his foot 

That was 55 years ago.

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