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  • Last night I was having a dream where I was having sexy time with some random cute girl. And then out of nowhere the cute girl says, " let me try this" and then proceeds to stick her whole hand down h

  • Armybrat
    Armybrat

    58 years ago today….  

  • Bullshit.  It's a dick move to knowingly jump in the express line with more items than allowed.  People get in that line to move quick.  It is their business if you fuck that up.

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Has anyone ever called a number on a bathroom stall and actually had a good time?

How so?

Seats are pretty chincy and not very comfy. Tray table is the size of a postcard.

But other than that the trip was fine.

pizza is Italian pie

lasagna is Italian cake

prove me wrong

Granddaughter is very upset.
She had recently picked out a very nice wedding dress for her nuptials in March. Of course it needed alterations to fit.
She called the shop this morning to inquire about picking it up - but got no answer, and discovered the place was closed & out of business (filed for bankruptcy. She even went by there and saw it was empty.
No wedding dress and no $2,200 (her dad’s dough).

Sorry to hear that, AB.  hope she gets some resolution in her favor.  

Hey Brat, it sucks, but is this something that the family can overcome?  

I suggested they just jump a broom while wearing overalls.

2 hours ago, Rimbo said:

lasagna is Italian cake

prove me wrong

 

Why do a small number of men have the extremely wrinkled scalp that is exposed when they have to shave their heads? Bizarre looking.

Also, a question for the wrinkled head posters here. Could you tell your whole life you had the wrinkled head, or was it a big surprise when you shaved your head, like damn?

3 hours ago, Armybrat said:

Granddaughter is very upset.
She had recently picked out a very nice wedding dress for her nuptials in March. Of course it needed alterations to fit.
She called the shop this morning to inquire about picking it up - but got no answer, and discovered the place was closed & out of business (filed for bankruptcy. She even went by there and saw it was empty.
No wedding dress and no $2,200 (her dad’s dough).

Sorry to hear that Brat. Some people just suck and need to... reconsider their life choices.

 

Slight tangent. How do dress makers / shops ever think it's acceptable to charge $2000 for a dress?  My wife spent $400 for a simple mermaid dress without frills and I thought it was a ripoff.

30 minutes ago, Steel Shank said:

Anybody ever bang their optometrist during an exam? At eye doctor now.

Can you discern if they’re your desired gender before the pipe-laying commences?

2 hours ago, Steel Shank said:

She’s a hot blooded Spaniard. Yearning.

I need to go to the eye doctor, I guess, since I can't see the pictures you've surely surly posted.

1 hour ago, NWBuck said:

I need to go to the eye doctor, I guess, since I can't see the pictures you've surely surly posted.

She's taking me to dinner next week. I'll see what I can do.

1 hour ago, Steel Shank said:

She's taking me to dinner next week. I'll see what I can do.

If true, this has the makings of an epic surly series. 

Has Santaclas been around for ever . Because if he has that means he has probably rape someone before .

Several people I know have failed upwards since I first knew them.

One guy used to work in my company. He was pretty... incompetent. He sent me an email inviting me to a Rams game... his title at his company? Division Manager.

The other guy I knew was laid off during Covid. He wanted to interview with my company, but we declined because... companies usually lay off the deadweight first. I saw him recently at a work event, and he's now is Senior VP at a food service equipment company. Not sure what kinda dough a SVP at a small company makes, but probably more than me.

Maybe I should fuck up more at my job and get promoted to CEO.

when I was a teen living at home someone bought Pantene Pro V for Dry Hair, and I found how smooth it made by hair. 
 

2 decades and some change later, up until now when this memory sparked in my head, i had never needed to think about shampoo again.

15 hours ago, Superhero said:

The other guy I knew was laid off during Covid. He wanted to interview with my company, but we declined because... companies usually lay off the deadweight first.

Layoffs happen in waves. In my experience, the deadweights get the best jobs first. When the late stage survivors get dropped, theres nothing left for them. 

On 9/19/2023 at 12:30 PM, Prepuce of Doom said:

Almost every time I eat a mochi ball, I stop and think for a moment about how much of my life was wasted before I ever ate my first one. 

 

My grandmother is Japanese, and she never, ever, no way in hell would consider putting ice cream in mochi.

If anything, she would put azuki bean paste inside. Or just plain mochi crusted with ground peanuts and sugar.

She would also make it savory, in a soup, or deep fry it.

 

But mochi ice cream? It's the work of the white devil.

 

19 hours ago, Superhero said:

My grandmother is Japanese, and she never, ever, no way in hell would consider putting ice cream in mochi.

Yeah, I put my cream in your grandma's mochi.  Wait.  Dammit, I had something for this.  

This actually looks kinda cool, anybody got a good link for an instructional video on how to do it more step-by-step ??

Isnt it pretty stupid that some people still perpetuate the medieval concept of patriarchal bloodline. Biologically speaking, if you only have a daughter, shes still passing on your DNA in the same way a son would. The only thing you might “lose” is the name from western patronymic convention. 

21 hours ago, 52-80 said:

Isnt it pretty stupid that some people still perpetuate the medieval concept of patriarchal bloodline. Biologically speaking, if you only have a daughter, shes still passing on your DNA in the same way a son would. The only thing you might “lose” is the name from western patronymic convention. 

My wife is an advanced-degree holding speech pathologist.  Published, been in leadership roles in their trade group, etc.  When we got married, I said it was completely up to her to keep her last name or hyphenate or whatever she wanted.  Being old school, midwest Catholic...she insisted she take my name.  A friend of mine's hippie wife from Hyde Park thought it was offensive that my wife "throw her career" away for a name.  They hyphenated their children's last names for hers and her husband's, my buddy from undergrad.  She asked if we'd do the same with our children one day.  I wrote out my wife's last name and my last name with a hyphen.  And assured her it was the most overly-sounding German surname in human history and our children would be brought up on war crimes by third period.  

I know there's a lotta baggage that come with names.  I'll just with what that person prefers because it's less condescending than pointing and shouting, "You there!  Sell me one of your melons!"  

13 minutes ago, YGIFS said:

My wife is an advanced-degree holding speech pathologist.  Published, been in leadership roles in their trade group, etc.  When we got married, I said it was completely up to her to keep her last name or hyphenate or whatever she wanted.  Being old school, midwest Catholic...she insisted she take my name.  A friend of mine's hippie wife from Hyde Park thought it was offensive that my wife "throw her career" away for a name.  They hyphenated their children's last names for hers and her husband's, my buddy from undergrad.  She asked if we'd do the same with our children one day.  I wrote out my wife's last name and my last name with a hyphen.  And assured her it was the most overly-sounding German surname in human history and our children would be brought up on war crimes by third period.  

I know there's a lotta baggage that come with names.  I'll just with what that person prefers because it's less condescending than pointing and shouting, "You there!  Sell me one of your melons!"  

Hyphenating is pretty dumb and self-centered. Where does it stop?  You can’t keep doing it.  You can’t even do it past one generation.. Just pick a name and stick to it. 

Always fun to see Santa riding by throwing candy to the neighborhood kids. 
A certain Surly poster drove that fire truck a few years ago….

 

EB624AA1-EB1A-4806-97E7-AAC78D21B868.jpeg

Its mildly absurd that sign language is country-specific

38 minutes ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

Why are you looking at the ass of the guy sitting next to you?

Directly in front I meant to type.   Auto correct 

You know the old "She/he has a face for radio" zing?

Someone explain to me how the fuck Tara Strong is only a voice actor.

tara-strong-craig-strong-los-angeles-ca-

Good Lord. She's basically flawless.

On 12/16/2023 at 12:33 PM, Armybrat said:

Always fun to see Santa riding by throwing candy to the neighborhood kids. 
A certain Surly poster drove that fire truck a few years ago….

 

EB624AA1-EB1A-4806-97E7-AAC78D21B868.jpeg

I'm glad you had fun seeing Santa with some kids enjoying the season.  But is it weird to see a FireTruck up close considering you invented Fire?  

2 hours ago, Rimbo said:

You know the old "She/he has a face for radio" zing?

Someone explain to me how the fuck Tara Strong is only a voice actor.

tara-strong-craig-strong-los-angeles-ca-

Good Lord. She's basically flawless.

Wrong….she’s wearing clothes.

10 minutes ago, Armybrat said:

Wrong….she’s wearing clothes.

don't care still would

6 hours ago, Rimbo said:

You know the old "She/he has a face for radio" zing?

Someone explain to me how the fuck Tara Strong is only a voice actor.

tara-strong-craig-strong-los-angeles-ca-

Good Lord. She's basically flawless.

 

Googling... and... nope. Not flawless.

Whether she's pretty enough for TV is up for debate. I'd say yes.

 

One thing we can all agree upon is... she's got HUUUGE tracts of land.

wikimedia foundation is worth about 250 million dollars, so why does it keep asking people for more donations?

On 12/16/2023 at 9:04 AM, YGIFS said:

My wife is an advanced-degree holding speech pathologist.  Published, been in leadership roles in their trade group, etc.  When we got married, I said it was completely up to her to keep her last name or hyphenate or whatever she wanted.  Being old school, midwest Catholic...she insisted she take my name.  A friend of mine's hippie wife from Hyde Park thought it was offensive that my wife "throw her career" away for a name.  They hyphenated their children's last names for hers and her husband's, my buddy from undergrad.  She asked if we'd do the same with our children one day.  I wrote out my wife's last name and my last name with a hyphen.  And assured her it was the most overly-sounding German surname in human history and our children would be brought up on war crimes by third period.  

I know there's a lotta baggage that come with names.  I'll just with what that person prefers because it's less condescending than pointing and shouting, "You there!  Sell me one of your melons!"  

 

 

How did siskel and evert convince all of america that they were the arbiters of good movie taste

1 hour ago, 52-80 said:

How did siskel and evert convince all of america that they were the arbiters of good movie taste

Why does Rice play Texas?  Because it's hahd!

On 12/18/2023 at 12:54 PM, Rimbo said:

You know the old "She/he has a face for radio" zing?

Someone explain to me how the fuck Tara Strong is only a voice actor.

tara-strong-craig-strong-los-angeles-ca-

Good Lord. She's basically flawless.

He look like Carsen Daley

22 hours ago, 52-80 said:

How did siskel and evert convince all of america that they were the arbiters of good movie taste

I grew up watching those guys on WGN or some other local Chicago station.  Their TV show ended up becoming very commercialized and borderline silly.  But as my father used to point out to when I was young, their written columns were incredibly written. 

Most people don't remember that Siskel was a Yale humanities graduate, wrote for the U.S. Army Defense Information School, and Playboy.  Quite a range.  His movie takes were often for shit, but he died before I really got into cinema anyway.  But I look back on his prose and style, and the man's writing and intellectual breakdown of the reflections of film on society were pretty damn impressive.  Ebert was a University of Chicago PhD candidate before he got into being a critic and writer.  Again, most Americans don't know that UoC is arguably the best school in the nation not in the Ivy League or named after Leyland, Jr.  Ebert had the better taste, or at least for me anyways.  He had a softer side than Siskel, and I always loved the way he understood fellow-Chicagoan, John Hughes.  He, too, could frame an argument on paper like very few (even won a Pulitzer). 

The two of them could have been almost anything given their intellectual prowess, but they ended up embracing movies because of how they felt and believed it was the most contemporary reflection of America in their lifetimes.  More than journalism, TV, politics, music, art, religion, etc.  And they were absolutely correct, just ahead of their time.  And it didn't help they really cut their teeth/"get big" in the 1980's when American movies were at arguably their lowest point of cultural significance---and we were as a country overall at our lowest point culturally (until the last 8 years or so).  And their show was stylized to pit them against one another and a glorified trailer for major studios.  But my father called maybe 10 people smart in my whole life, and he considered Roger Ebert to be absolutely brilliant (primarily off camera, and they met a few times in real life).  

Americans consider high cinema to be the newest Larry the Cable Guy picture or Deuce Bigalow prequel.  Siskel and Ebert saw this dumbing-down of America with movies being a leading indicator.  The harbingers of our demise.  But yeah, to your point---they missed quite frequently.  But their niche was and is remains quite unique.  I kinda miss 'em.

14 minutes ago, YGIFS said:

I grew up watching those guys on WGN or some other local Chicago station.  Their TV show ended up becoming very commercialized and borderline silly.  But as my father used to point out to when I was young, their written columns were incredibly written. 

Most people don't remember that Siskel was a Yale humanities graduate, wrote for the U.S. Army Defense Information School, and Playboy.  Quite a range.  His movie takes were often for shit, but he died before I really got into cinema anyway.  But I look back on his prose and style, and the man's writing and intellectual breakdown of the reflections of film on society were pretty damn impressive.  Ebert was a University of Chicago PhD candidate before he got into being a critic and writer.  Again, most Americans don't know that UoC is arguably the best school in the nation not in the Ivy League or named after Leyland, Jr.  Ebert had the better taste, or at least for me anyways.  He had a softer side than Siskel, and I always loved the way he understood fellow-Chicagoan, John Hughes.  He, too, could frame an argument on paper like very few (even won a Pulitzer). 

The two of them could have been almost anything given their intellectual prowess, but they ended up embracing movies because of how they felt and believed it was the most contemporary reflection of America in their lifetimes.  More than journalism, TV, politics, music, art, religion, etc.  And they were absolutely correct, just ahead of their time.  And it didn't help they really cut their teeth/"get big" in the 1980's when American movies were at arguably their lowest point of cultural significance---and we were as a country overall at our lowest point culturally (until the last 8 years or so).  And their show was stylized to pit them against one another and a glorified trailer for major studios.  But my father called maybe 10 people smart in my whole life, and he considered Roger Ebert to be absolutely brilliant (primarily off camera, and they met a few times in real life).  

Americans consider high cinema to be the newest Larry the Cable Guy picture or Deuce Bigalow prequel.  Siskel and Ebert saw this dumbing-down of America with movies being a leading indicator.  The harbingers of our demise.  But yeah, to your point---they missed quite frequently.  But their niche was and is remains quite unique.  I kinda miss 'em.

 

good lord does the panhandle STINK right now 😝

i mean we've made this drive several dozen times... but this is by far the worst. there aren't even that many cows in the immediate vicinity...but from Texline through Childress, just passed thru wave after wave of god awful stank! 

they obviously just cut hay around here, maybe they dump millions of gallons of fertilizer onto all these fields this time of year? dunno. but I can't imagine living here, ha!

Edited by mchookem

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Football ... Basketball ... Baseball ... Other Sports ... Futbol ... 🤫995🤫 ... Gambling ... Movies & TV ... Music ... Hobbies ... Lulz ... Food & Travel ... Daily Texan ... Business & Markets ... Cloak Room ... Help ... For Sale ... Board Discussion ... Advertise... Tailgate Donations