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10 hours ago, closetohumping said:

Caught my neighbor checking out my junk while we were chatting

Was he cute?

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  • Last night I was having a dream where I was having sexy time with some random cute girl. And then out of nowhere the cute girl says, " let me try this" and then proceeds to stick her whole hand down h

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    Armybrat

    58 years ago today….  

  • Bullshit.  It's a dick move to knowingly jump in the express line with more items than allowed.  People get in that line to move quick.  It is their business if you fuck that up.

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11 hours ago, markstanco said:


Way back in 2011, they came out with a mouse that had a back button, minimize button, scroll button, and a scroll wheel.

Armybrat is laughing at you.

on this topic, if you dont have a logitech mx master 3. you should.  #masterracemouse

12 hours ago, closetohumping said:

Caught my neighbor checking out my junk while we were chatting

So did you let him touch it?

12 hours ago, closetohumping said:

Caught my neighbor checking out my junk while we were chatting

Yeah. Well maybe you should put on some pants. 
 

 

[neighbor] He was asking for it [/neighbor]. 

Edited by Superhero

35 minutes ago, 52-80 said:

on this topic, if you dont have a logitech mx master 3. you should.  #masterracemouse

I have the MX, love it. 

I've been invited to an event that says to "Wear your best Texas attire." It is a corporate event from an out of state business, but with a relaxed atmosphere -- think if Google or Tesla put on an event in Texas.

What should I wear? I know the answer is to dress up as a caricature of a Texan.

But when someone says dress like a Texan, I think does that mean I should dress like SRV? Maybe Bum? Should I dress like Earl Campbell? Sam Houston (honorary)? Davy Crockett (honorary)? Willie? Michael Dell? Billy Gibbons? Eisenhower? Tell me what the hell does a Texan look like?

8 minutes ago, FirstTimeCaller said:

I've been invited to an event that says to "Wear your best Texas attire." It is a corporate event from an out of state business, but with a relaxed atmosphere -- think if Google or Tesla put on an event in Texas.

What should I wear? I know the answer is to dress up as a caricature of a Texan.

But when someone says dress like a Texan, I think does that mean I should dress like SRV? Maybe Bum? Should I dress like Earl Campbell? Sam Houston (honorary)? Davy Crockett (honorary)? Willie? Michael Dell? Billy Gibbons? Eisenhower? Tell me what the hell does a Texan look like?

giphy.gif

12 minutes ago, FirstTimeCaller said:

I've been invited to an event that says to "Wear your best Texas attire." It is a corporate event from an out of state business, but with a relaxed atmosphere -- think if Google or Tesla put on an event in Texas.

What should I wear? I know the answer is to dress up as a caricature of a Texan.

But when someone says dress like a Texan, I think does that mean I should dress like SRV? Maybe Bum? Should I dress like Earl Campbell? Sam Houston (honorary)? Davy Crockett (honorary)? Willie? Michael Dell? Billy Gibbons? Eisenhower? Tell me what the hell does a Texan look like?

Eisenhower was a goddamn Kansan.  He’s ours. 

14 minutes ago, Kennythetiger said:

Eisenhower was a goddamn Kansan.  He’s ours. 

At 2 years old, I'll give you that. Unlike some certain high level politicians for this state that weren't born here and moved here after college. /noCRokmaybealittleCR

1 hour ago, FirstTimeCaller said:

I've been invited to an event that says to "Wear your best Texas attire." It is a corporate event from an out of state business, but with a relaxed atmosphere -- think if Google or Tesla put on an event in Texas.

What should I wear? I know the answer is to dress up as a caricature of a Texan.

But when someone says dress like a Texan, I think does that mean I should dress like SRV? Maybe Bum? Should I dress like Earl Campbell? Sam Houston (honorary)? Davy Crockett (honorary)? Willie? Michael Dell? Billy Gibbons? Eisenhower? Tell me what the hell does a Texan look like?

We as a forum and as a brotherhood (with respect to a handful of chicks) have a vested interest in your attire for this event. We look forward to the pictures. The eyes of Texas are upon you.
And remember- we’re all counting on you. 

If anyone knew who I was, I go as this beautiful SOB:

image.thumb.png.69344f976ccca8c265e2c23511df2ae8.png

Or should I scare the hell out of them and dress like Bun?

image.png.53a6140744b6c82abcbdc517a64a77f2.png

I have seen Cartaphilus yet again.  He reminds me of that scene in ‘2010’ movie.  Not the best film ever, But when the widow asks David on the screen what’s going to happen.  To which David replies, “Something wonderful.”  He tacitly implied something wonderful is coming in October.  I smiled.  He is still condemned to walk the Earth quite a while Longer.  But the man knows a tumbling cult when he sees One.  
 

this is going to be a glorious year

It seems to me that the dirtiest thing in a house is probably the bar inside the toilet paper holder. It would often get used when hands are the dirtiest, and it never gets cleaned.

12 minutes ago, YGIFS said:

I have seen Cartaphilus yet again.  He reminds me of that scene in ‘2010’ movie.  Not the best film ever, But when the widow asks David on the screen what’s going to happen.  To which David replies, “Something wonderful.”

 

Agreed, but for some reason I can watch the shit out of that movie.

On 1/3/2024 at 11:40 AM, Superhero said:

my Telecaster

Denzel Washington GIF

7 hours ago, FirstTimeCaller said:

I've been invited to an event that says to "Wear your best Texas attire." It is a corporate event from an out of state business, but with a relaxed atmosphere -- think if Google or Tesla put on an event in Texas.

What should I wear? I know the answer is to dress up as a caricature of a Texan.

But when someone says dress like a Texan, I think does that mean I should dress like SRV? Maybe Bum? Should I dress like Earl Campbell? Sam Houston (honorary)? Davy Crockett (honorary)? Willie? Michael Dell? Billy Gibbons? Eisenhower? Tell me what the hell does a Texan look like?

A tailored Longhorn football jersey.

I got a tax form over 6 cents. $0.06. Forget the cost of the stamp; the paper and toner used in printing it costs more.

 

On 1/29/2024 at 5:53 AM, BehoId, The Underminer! said:

Percent of 4th grade girls that can name one of the teams in the Super Bowl is off the charts this year. 

Am father of 4th grader. Can confirm.

7 hours ago, FirstTimeCaller said:

I've been invited to an event that says to "Wear your best Texas attire." It is a corporate event from an out of state business, but with a relaxed atmosphere -- think if Google or Tesla put on an event in Texas.

What should I wear? I know the answer is to dress up as a caricature of a Texan.

But when someone says dress like a Texan, I think does that mean I should dress like SRV? Maybe Bum? Should I dress like Earl Campbell? Sam Houston (honorary)? Davy Crockett (honorary)? Willie? Michael Dell? Billy Gibbons? Eisenhower? Tell me what the hell does a Texan look like?

I'd probably wear like jeans, boots and a westerny shirt?

Except I don't own a pair of boots. 

Maybe I'd just dress normally.

There should be a standardized signal using car horns and/or brights to tell a dumbass they need to turn on their lights at night.

They should make that part of the written DL test.

 

I blame stupid people. I also blame the interiors of modern cars being so bright that people think they’re exterior lights are on as well.

I'm in @BevoXV's neighborhood & there's a guy jogging up & down the street - with every stride, it looks like he's in that "I'm about to stop / wind down your jog" move.

One day, some engineer at a plastics company asked “why cant we make bottle caps half as tall?”  And they did, and it worked. And now the result of his work is ubiquitous across america and saved cumulative tens of millions of dollars for drinks company and everyone else along the product chain and improved their carbon footprint. 
 

and nobody knows his name. His employer probably gave him a $2000 christmas bonus for the great idea. 
 

green-thin-plastic-bottle-cap-white-back

1 hour ago, 52-80 said:

One day, some engineer at a plastics company asked “why cant we make bottle caps half as tall?”  And they did, and it worked. And now the result of his work is ubiquitous across america and saved cumulative tens of millions of dollars for drinks company and everyone else along the product chain and improved their carbon footprint. 
 

and nobody knows his name. His employer probably gave him a $2000 christmas bonus for the great idea. 
 

green-thin-plastic-bottle-cap-white-back

More like this 

il_1140xN.2722964876_eki3.jpg

1 hour ago, 52-80 said:

One day, some engineer at a plastics company asked “why cant we make bottle caps half as tall?”  And they did, and it worked. And now the result of his work is ubiquitous across america and saved cumulative tens of millions of dollars for drinks company and everyone else along the product chain and improved their carbon footprint. 
 

and nobody knows his name. His employer probably gave him a $2000 christmas bonus for the great idea. 
 

green-thin-plastic-bottle-cap-white-back

That's weird, but an important point.  Was just thinking about this yesterday.  I rarely consume bottled water anymore with a sturdy travel mug.  But had one and was thinking about the smaller cap and how much it has saved in terms of resources.  And while it's a bit of a pain in the ass to get back on correctly so you can save the last half for the ride home, it really has made a difference.  And nobody bitches about it.  It takes a little muscle memory to get used to, but nobody complains about it and everybody knows it's better for our environment in the long run and just as effective.  

I wonder what we could achieve it we applied that same mentality to the other avenues of our environmental impact?  

Growing up in the 70s, I was convinced that the imminent global ice age was going to wipe us all out, oil would run out by 1980, no one ever survived the Bermuda Triangle, and that quicksand was around every corner and I was definitely going to encounter it.  Well, the first three all proved to be false, and now, for you fellow Gen Xers, here's the tip that will save your life.

 

 

 

Edited by nnm

Growing up in South Florida in the 70's, I was convinced that killer bees were gonna totally take over all the warm climates & I was gonna have to move to Canada.

10 hours ago, ROFL BOX said:

Growing up in South Florida in the 70's, I was convinced that killer bees were gonna totally take over all the warm climates & I was gonna have to move to Canada.

Some people still believe that even today

15 hours ago, nnm said:

Growing up in the 70s, I was convinced that the imminent global ice age was going to wipe us all out, oil would run out by 1980, no one ever survived the Bermuda Triangle, and that quicksand was around every corner and I was definitely going to encounter it.  Well, the first three all proved to be false, and now, for you fellow Gen Xers, here's the tip that will save your life.

 

 

 

Almost lost a $400 hand cart. 

I'm all for the killer bees overtaking Floriduh. 

15 hours ago, nnm said:

Growing up in the 70s, I was convinced that the imminent global ice age was going to wipe us all out, oil would run out by 1980, no one ever survived the Bermuda Triangle, and that quicksand was around every corner and I was definitely going to encounter it.  Well, the first three all proved to be false, and now, for you fellow Gen Xers, here's the tip that will save your life.

 

 

 

 

That's not how David Banner did it on the Incredible Hulk episode that forever seared the dangers of quicksand into my youthful, impressionable brain.  I think every popular TV show during era had a plot line involving QS, including the Love Boat.

How come kansas isnt pronounced kan-saw and arkansas isnt our-kan-sus

1 hour ago, 52-80 said:

How come kansas isnt pronounced kan-saw and arkansas isnt our-kan-sus

In the 90s, I worked on an interstate water compact case involving Colorado, Nebraska, and Kansas., over apportionment from the Arkansas river. We represented the state of Kansas. Our client, the AG and Governor of Kansas, on behalf of the state of Kansas, pronounced the name of the river the “Ar-KANSAS” river. I don’t know how common that is, but it’s how we rolled at the time. 

I've been invited to an event that says to "Wear your best Texas attire." It is a corporate event from an out of state business, but with a relaxed atmosphere -- think if Google or Tesla put on an event in Texas.
What should I wear? I know the answer is to dress up as a caricature of a Texan.
But when someone says dress like a Texan, I think does that mean I should dress like SRV? Maybe Bum? Should I dress like Earl Campbell? Sam Houston (honorary)? Davy Crockett (honorary)? Willie? Michael Dell? Billy Gibbons? Eisenhower? Tell me what the hell does a Texan look like?

If it’s winter, dress like every Texas dad I know: shorts, flip flops, and a Longhorn hoodie.
23 minutes ago, nnm said:

In the 90s, I worked on an interstate water compact case involving Colorado, Nebraska, and Kansas., over apportionment from the Arkansas river. We represented the state of Kansas. Our client, the AG and Governor of Kansas, on behalf of the state of Kansas, pronounced the name of the river the “Ar-KANSAS” river. I don’t know how common that is, but it’s how we rolled at the time. 

If he says it, its official. 
 

Overtime my wife has successfully gotten me IKEA-pilled. Ive fairly committed the floorplan and warehouse layout to memory, and know the shortcuts to a quick exit. 

The household accessories are unbeatable. All sorts of storage boxes, hooks, miniature shelves, drawers, etc. Target had nothing on it (hugely overrated btw). Surprisingly the small electronics like rechargeable batteries, cables, wireless pads, are all top notch. 
 

2 hours ago, 52-80 said:

How come kansas isnt pronounced kan-saw and arkansas isnt our-kan-sus

Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?

Baseball is such a terrible sport that a guy with one arm (jim abbott) achieved one of its greatest throwing feats (no-hitter)

First of all, he had two arms.  He was just missing a significant portion of one hand is all.  It's a beautiful game for those that can see into the soul of it.  And finally, you said "throwing feats" in a one-armed quip.  I mean, c'mon the joke is right there...do the legwork bro.

Maybe it deserves a thread in the music sub, but just found that that Michelle Obama has more Grammys than Nirvana.

image.png.491cc7cc605a261d1e4818fd3d4f0fb9.png

 

image.png.16874e3ae8fa54b98cfda0cf092ca3f7.png

To be fair, Michelle does have a lovely speaking voice.  I don't own any of her books on tape, but she has a great voice.  And Nirvana didn't really have time to win more Grammy's because Kurt didn't like the sound of his own voice so he decided to have it violently altered.  

Edited by YGIFS

45 minutes ago, YGIFS said:

To be fair, Michelle does have a lovely speaking voice.  I don't own any of her books on tape, but she has a great voice.  And Nirvana didn't really have time to win more Grammy's because Kurt didn't like the sound of his own voice so he decided to have it violently altered.  

They didn't win one until 1995 for Unplugged, after Kurt killed himself. And then they got a BS "lifetime achievement" years later.

Oh he certainly unplugged his vocal cord.  

 

(too soon?)  

Coming up, Kurt had a lot of naysayers, guess he proved their theory wrong about not having a shot. 

37 minutes ago, thunderlounge said:

Coming up, Kurt had a lot of naysayers, guess he proved their theory wrong about not having a shot. 

Pretty sure “not having a shot” was never Kurt’s problem. 

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Football ... Basketball ... Baseball ... Other Sports ... Futbol ... 🤫995🤫 ... Gambling ... Movies & TV ... Music ... Hobbies ... Lulz ... Food & Travel ... Daily Texan ... Business & Markets ... Cloak Room ... Help ... For Sale ... Board Discussion ... Advertise... Tailgate Donations