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Featured Replies

Dark mattee is everything else.. so everything happens in relation to dark. Thus it has no speed.
Ask me about neutrinos!

Neutrinos, Ware rats in Louisiana?

I’ll take neutrinos for 200.
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  • Last night I was having a dream where I was having sexy time with some random cute girl. And then out of nowhere the cute girl says, " let me try this" and then proceeds to stick her whole hand down h

  • Armybrat
    Armybrat

    58 years ago today….  

  • Bullshit.  It's a dick move to knowingly jump in the express line with more items than allowed.  People get in that line to move quick.  It is their business if you fuck that up.

Posted Images

On 3/29/2018 at 9:57 AM, Prepuce of Doom said:

You need to wear more colored t-shirts.

I harvest my lint every morning before showering, and once I have a sufficient crop, I mail it to my friends.
 

I probably shouldn't show this to you, but I think you could really take your lint fetish to the next level with this

qXrjrH4.gif

Edited by retread

  • Author
12 hours ago, DougO said:

"I think I'll start a thread about random thoughts that don't warrant a thread."

I'm still dealing with the fever blister too.

14 hours ago, yoshi said:

Spaghetti always tastes better on the 2nd day.

So does chili.

 

5 minutes ago, GhostRider said:

So does chili.

 

It's the beans.

Just now, BurntEyes said:

Jesus titty fucking Christ, are you from Ohio. Only reason one would think of chili in relation to a spaghetti post.

Nope.  When I read his post, I thought about other foods that are better the next day and then chili came to mind.  I have never and will never allow spaghetti nor beans anywhere near my chili.

I really need to mow my back yard.  

But I just took advantage of the perfect weather to go sit outside and read, and I noticed how beautiful the grass rippling in the wind is.

I was just reminded that it's almost April Fools Day. Which means stupid companies posting fake shit on social media trying to be humorous. 


21b4b224776eebce59ed1cec0d33baba.jpg


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
On 3/29/2018 at 8:11 PM, yoshi said:

Spaghetti always tastes better on the 2nd day.

try making your sauce a day before you want to eat it

There's a bigass moth flying around in here that's the size of a fuckin' bat.



Being left handed, I always put my belt on upside down (without even knowing it) until I got a buckle as a graduation gift. It fucks me up for a second to put on a different belt now.
Probably need a "left handed problem" thread.

Why is Easter on Sunday. Egg hunting would be much more fun on Saturday :/

On 3/27/2018 at 2:34 PM, DarthBalls said:

I use my phone for: weather, maps, music, video media, news, camera, photo library, wife locator, home security control, house thermostat,  email, text messages, kitchen timer, food thermometer display, book reading, calorie log, crossword puzzles, phone calls, exercise log and general research tool. It's overwhelming and i don't think there is any way to go back to the way it was before. 

I liked it when you could get in your car and leave and nobody could get in touch with you.

On 3/25/2018 at 1:35 PM, GSU&UT said:

Fever blisters suck

Agreed. Whenever you feel one coming, get some hydrogen peroxide, dip a q-tip in it and rub it on your lip. It will sting but you will see pus come to the surface. Do this 3 times a day and it will go away quickly.

You'e welcome 

On 4/3/2018 at 6:05 PM, BurntOrangeCrush said:

Agreed. Whenever you feel one coming, get some hydrogen peroxide, dip a q-tip in it and rub it on your lip. It will sting but you will see pus come to the surface. Do this 3 times a day and it will go away quickly.

You'e welcome 

* no allopathic trials including prospective randomized control data were obtained in the offering of this folksy advice

I don’t understand ocean pressure at depth, and I’ve been scuba certified since age 12. I get the general concept but they have to make a submarine tank to get to the bottom of the Mariana Trench and the first thing they see down there is some type of soft-bodied skate. Why isn’t that thing crushed into a tiny ball when my head would implode miles above it?

15 hours ago, Hanrahan said:

I don’t understand ocean pressure at depth, and I’ve been scuba certified since age 12. I get the general concept but they have to make a submarine tank to get to the bottom of the Mariana Trench and the first thing they see down there is some type of soft-bodied skate. Why isn’t that thing crushed into a tiny ball when my head would implode miles above it?

Because you touch yourself. 

If your last name is Peterson, you will probably kill your wife(Michael, Drew & Scott).

7 hours ago, LW Goatman said:

A bit disappointed the blue moon isn't actually blue.

Only in Kentucky. 

5 minutes ago, Underdog said:

Only in Kentucky. 

Kentucky is part of the north.

On 3/31/2018 at 8:46 PM, Steamboat1874 said:

Jupiter is the least of our worries...

Uranus is a different story.

 

 

So is Urmomsanus.

How would she not think so..? #SheGonGetIt... (if she so consents & is not of an inebriated capacity)

]Meagan_Good_sexy_naked-7.jpg

I will always stop and glance over any issue from Sports Illustrated that has either: the latest swimsuit models or simply cheerleaders on the cover...

 

Image result for arizona state sports illustrated girls

Quote

Teen told to place band aids over perky nipples in Florida...

The solution is simple, as she has 2 options:

#1).81ivUmVmYuL._UL1500_.jpg

#2).3aa89cd.jpg

Why do microwaves have 10 discrete power levels? I have never, ever used anything but 10 or 5. Are there seriously people out there that are like "3 is perfect but 4 is too fucking much!!"

There's a frozen breakfast sandwich that my son likes that is 30% for a couple of minutes and then 1 minute on high. Besides that, no.

You remember her as Starla in Napoleon Dynamite, but what she looks like now is truly jaw dropping!



There's a frozen breakfast sandwich that my son likes that is a couple of minutes on high.


FIFY and saved you time and hassle.

I just had the most glorious belch I've had in years. Even my coworkers said gotdam, Dude.

17 hours ago, tokamak said:

Why do microwaves have 10 discrete power levels? I have never, ever used anything but 10 or 5. Are there seriously people out there that are like "3 is perfect but 4 is too fucking much!!"

They have two power levels: on and off. The pre-programmed power levels are just ratios of time on vs. time off. 

Get a notepad and a non-metallic bowl full of water. Put the bowl of water in your microwave. Test each power level for a minute and record the period between power on and power off in your notepad. 

I don't know about you but I find it a lot better to reheat food in the microwave a little more slowly with an occasional stir. It might take me as long as five or six minutes to reheat a dish doing it that way. The horror. 

Remember when the teacher said "Always doodle between the lines"...

13620178_1134913176587858_20559268484904

I think I might have forgotten..? Where is NSAA..? (So I can stuff some of the "other" pics)...

29738210_203838757014915_289083381567507

Doesn't matter. You still haven't posted a pic. Imgur don't work on Surly (for the 1000th time).

I really hate it when I look at a chick's POF profile and she has like 8 photos and gets progressively fatter in each one. 

I guess Vic Mackey loves that, but I don't. 

Every night without fail I wake up at 3:30 on the dot and it takes me at least an hour to go back to sleep. Why is that?

You live in Amityville, your house is haunted, and your clock is 15 minutes fast. 

If USA is tied to the lizard people from outer space, Hello Zuk, and the lizard people hate the grey people are the greys in cahoots with Russia?  Is that why we are always at odds with Russia despite being very similar?  #conspiracythoughtexperiment #popcorn #ishouldwritescifi

June bugs are the drunk drivers the insect world.  Love bugs are the..............763794.jpg

Practically every weed that grows in my yard is edible. Most of them taste better than lettuce in any of the dishes in which I'd normally use lettuce.

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