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2 hours ago, NWBuck said:

Crows are awesome.

corvus corax, common raven, smartest of all birds. rare in these partssssss. 

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  • Last night I was having a dream where I was having sexy time with some random cute girl. And then out of nowhere the cute girl says, " let me try this" and then proceeds to stick her whole hand down h

  • Armybrat
    Armybrat

    58 years ago today….  

  • Bullshit.  It's a dick move to knowingly jump in the express line with more items than allowed.  People get in that line to move quick.  It is their business if you fuck that up.

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15 hours ago, Underdog said:

Love me some Sheryl Crow. 

She's a succubus.

Today has been a really shitty day. I feel like I've been punched in the gut and kicked in the head...

2 coworkers / friends sent out their "Thank you, you've all been great, but I'm moving on" emails today. This is in addition to another coworker that left earlier this year. Even though we weren't friends outside of work, we got along well, had met each others' families at company events, and I genuinely cared about them.

One of the guys who's leaving is in my group, and it's hit me particularly hard. I just spoke to him and it his mind is set, no turning back now. I'm pretty fucking sad right now.

 

Also... about a month ago, we got an email from our office's building management saying that one of the employees had Covid. On Friday, they sent another email saying he had passed. He was probably in his early- to mid- 60s, but had diabetes, hypertension, and a host of underlying health conditions (we chatted a few times about our health issues).

Dale was one of the friendliest person I knew. Always had a big smile, a joke, and he knew my name without me ever telling him. He opened the door for several hundred people everyday, and I wouldn't be surprised if he knew everyone's names.

I'm gonna miss my coworkers who quit a lot, but this is on another level.

 

She's a succubus.

You shut your blaspheming mouth. She’s an angel.
14 hours ago, Superhero said:

Also... about a month ago, we got an email from our office's building management saying that one of the employees had Covid. On Friday, they sent another email saying he had passed. He was probably in his early- to mid- 60s, but had diabetes, hypertension, and a host of underlying health conditions (we chatted a few times about our health issues).

Dale was one of the friendliest person I knew. Always had a big smile, a joke, and he knew my name without me ever telling him. He opened the door for several hundred people everyday, and I wouldn't be surprised if he knew everyone's names.

I'm gonna miss my coworkers who quit a lot, but this is on another level.

 

 

14 hours ago, Superhero said:

Today has been a really shitty day. I feel like I've been punched in the gut and kicked in the head...

2 coworkers / friends sent out their "Thank you, you've all been great, but I'm moving on" emails today. This is in addition to another coworker that left earlier this year. Even though we weren't friends outside of work, we got along well, had met each others' families at company events, and I genuinely cared about them.

One of the guys who's leaving is in my group, and it's hit me particularly hard. I just spoke to him and it his mind is set, no turning back now. I'm pretty fucking sad right now.

 

Shit is crazy right now but the dawn is coming. Hopefully, we learn a huge lesson about what is really important in our lives and live accordingly. YOLO (as the kids say)

Are there alligators in San Antonio, Austin, and Denton?
Yes.
 


Yes sir. Upper Trinity, Brazos, Navasota, Neches, Sabine and Red rivers all have gators.

SE Oklahoma and all the way to NC, as well.

Do a video or image search for “alligator snorkeling”. During cold snaps like last weeks, they have the same hypothermic sleep state as sea turtles, but they instinctively snorkel their snouts should ice form on the surface.


Yes sir. Upper Trinity, Brazos, Navasota, Neches, Sabine and Red rivers all have gators.

SE Oklahoma and all the way to NC, as well.

Do a video or image search for “alligator snorkeling”. During cold snaps like last weeks, they have the same hypothermic sleep state as sea turtles, but they instinctively snorkel their snouts should ice form on the surface.
And they are ornery because they have all them teeth and no toothbrush.
6 minutes ago, Born to Run said:

And they are ornery because they have all them teeth and no toothbrush.

appreciate adam sandler GIF

I had one out by the lake house on Travis circa 2003. Redneck neighbors kilt it and hung is head on the tree next to our path to the dock.


Did you get to see its medulla oblongata?
31 minutes ago, Jerry Callo said:
4 hours ago, clapclapclap said:
Are there alligators in San Antonio, Austin, and Denton?
Yes.
Gator-Distribution.jpg
http://dfwwildlife.org/wp-content/uploads/2018/09/Alligator-Distribution-in-Texas.pdf
 

I had one out by the lake house on Travis circa 2003. Redneck neighbors kilt it and hung is head on the tree next to our path to the dock.

Damn I never knew a big chunk of West Texas was just a giant gata

4 hours ago, Llano Estacado said:

Do a video or image search for “alligator snorkeling”. During cold snaps like last weeks, they have the same hypothermic sleep state as sea turtles, but they instinctively snorkel their snouts should ice form on the surface.

I really thought when I read this at first that it was going to be some nightmare fuel video underwater with zero visibility until you're right on them.

Scuba lessons in lake Travis scheduled... she nervously googled “are their alligators in lake Travis.” FML.

Edited by troph

They can move that line on up into Hood and Somervell counties. There was a 14 footer in Squaw Creek Reservoir, absolutely huge. The water is warm since it is a cooling lake for the nuclear plant. It used to swim up to the boat, and we would take some cans of vienna sausage with us and fed them to it. Someone found an alligator slide-in spot by a popular lakefront restaurant on Lake Granbury. There have been a couple spotted along our stretch of the river as well.

CHIEF

On 2/17/2021 at 9:14 AM, Underdog said:

Why I sit at the urinal, keep an eye on you fucks. 

With this group it is probably a good idea to keep your hog eye covered.

I have been on a sunflower seeds kick lately, gone through 4 or 5 containers of them.  

11 hours ago, troph said:

Scuba lessons in lake Travis scheduled... she nervously googled “are their alligators in lake Travis.” FML.

I'd be less worried about alligators and more concerned about dogs Lake Travis dead.

And you don't think the two are interconnected?  

Personally, I think the algae story is just a cover story being propagatored by the Alligators. 

Edited by Lobo

bring extra dial soap bars.  when they bite down on you shove it in their face and mouth.  will both disinfect and teach the gator a lesson.

It's snowing again.   I don't have to shovel it, plow it, or anything.   This will eventually change and for now, fuck it, let's enjoy the snow show.

23 minutes ago, Doc Holliday said:

It's snowing again.   I don't have to shovel it, plow it, or anything.   This will eventually change and for now, fuck it, let's enjoy the snow show.

You must drive a Subaru.

2 minutes ago, Superhero said:

You must drive a Subaru.

Really? You think I can fit into a suburu? playa, please. 

Why are my white nose hairs so much longer than the others? Surely there is a biological explanation for this.

3 hours ago, 'stache said:

Why are my white nose hairs so much longer than the others? Surely there is a biological explanation for this.

Obviously they are older.  You should trim your nose hairs more often than every ten years.

Fuck apple in the goat ass for not being able to create a streaming service that actually works like every other company in the world has been able to

On 2/8/2021 at 6:17 PM, Pancho said:

 

giphy.gif

<----- Holy Shit Thread

Vic's Friend's Food Thread ------->

Willie Nelson is 4 years older than my mom...  LOLz.

The amount of booze, pot, and pussy that man has used in his life has got to be astronomical.  My mom's just a plain ole tea totaler...

Edited by slorch

As near as I can tell, and according to Schrödinger's equation, there's a period of time where it's both butt sweat AND poop juice.

13 hours ago, slorch said:

Willie Nelson is 4 years older than my mom...  LOLz.

The amount of booze, pot, and pussy that man has used in his life has got to be astronomical.  My mom's just a plain ole tea totaler...

That’s exactly what she wants you to think. 

16 hours ago, slorch said:

Willie Nelson is 4 years older than my mom...  LOLz.

The amount of booze, pot, and pussy that man has used in his life has got to be astronomical.  My mom's just a plain ole tea totaler...

She's bangin' Willie, isn't she.

The funny part of that line is I don’t know who would be getting the better or worst end of the deal. 

On 2/24/2021 at 4:23 PM, Doc Holliday said:

bring extra dial soap bars.  when they bite down on you shove it in their face and mouth.  will both disinfect and teach the gator a lesson.

I thought this was like a prison rape scenario until I read upthread.

On 2/16/2021 at 11:35 PM, mulletpelini said:

It occurred to me that the two times you're most vulnerable is when you're sleeping and when you're standing at a urinal peeing.

Tried ta told ya.

 

13 hours ago, closetohumping said:

I wish I could find an alternative, legal way to make money other than sell software

You and me both. 

3 hours ago, DigglerontheHoof said:

You and me both. 

I haven't met an AE who hasn't said the same, but all of our Opex is way too high to do a regular job.  So, back to prospecting.

16 hours ago, closetohumping said:

I wish I could find an alternative, legal way to make money other than sell software

Sugar Baby thread ------------------->

So recently I was made aware that there is a Gorzyzsky middle school in south Austin. Gorzyzsky was my band teacher for the one year I took it in 6th grade. My two random thoughts:

- I guess that makes me old as fuck that schools are being named after my old teachers

- She was a bitch

11 minutes ago, BradInATX said:

She was a bitch

Bitch Middle School would be a fantastic name. Imagine the T-shirt sales on the internet.

11 hours ago, Cheeseweasel said:

Bitch Middle School would be a fantastic name. Imagine the T-shirt sales on the internet.

I went to Memorial middle school in Harlingen. It was originally named after some lady whose last name was literally Gay. It was known as Gay Junior High all the way until the late 80s I think.

On 2/16/2021 at 11:35 PM, mulletpelini said:

It occurred to me that the two times you're most vulnerable is when you're sleeping and when you're standing at a urinal peeing.

Many years ago I once worked on a video for a self defense specialist who did training for big execs, politicians/diplomats, and celebrities.  He was a former Navy SEAL or special forces guy, can't remember.  One of the first things he said was never, ever, ever use a urinal or trough if you absolutely don't have to.  Always use a stall, preferably with a locking door, especially if you're anywhere slightly sketchy.  He said that you would stunned how many people are robbed, attacked or assassinated with their dick in their hand.  That was probably 25 years ago now, but I still think about it every time I walk into a public bathroom.

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