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5 minutes ago, Kennythetiger said:

Which one is better?

DAMMIT Kenny! If you stir up the band nerds, I sweatergawd, I'll put a speedknot on your forehead.

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  • Last night I was having a dream where I was having sexy time with some random cute girl. And then out of nowhere the cute girl says, " let me try this" and then proceeds to stick her whole hand down h

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    Armybrat

    58 years ago today….  

  • Bullshit.  It's a dick move to knowingly jump in the express line with more items than allowed.  People get in that line to move quick.  It is their business if you fuck that up.

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19 minutes ago, Kennythetiger said:

Which one is better?

NYPO is supposedly more heralded.  and the "Met" is another separate opera group, not just the opera building, or the art museum.

 

Some bougie shit

1 hour ago, Kennythetiger said:

Which one is better?

They both suck compared to the Policeman's Benevolent Association Orchestra.

4 hours ago, TKthunder2 said:

They both suck compared to the Policeman's Benevolent Association Orchestra.

Like the old saying goes, "Your orchestra is only as good as your conductor.  And your conductor is only as good as his baton."  

How do Ant-Man’s lungs process normal size O2 molecules when he goes quantum?

How do Ant-Man’s lungs process normal size O2 molecules when he goes quantum?

It is something to do with Michelle Pfieffer still being smoking hot. Of that, I’m sure.

Today I learned the hard way that Airport Blvd in austin is nowhere near the airport. Whose fucking idea was that. 

Edited by Helobious

On 2/25/2022 at 9:19 PM, Guadaloopy said:

How do Ant-Man’s lungs process normal size O2 molecules when he goes quantum?

I contemplated the same as a young boy

 

 

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My son has what I call a doggy butt. 

I sometimes wipe his butt, and the first wipe is already clean. He eats a LOT of fruit. Maybe that's why. But I am jealous.

 

5 hours ago, Helobious said:

Today I learned the hard way that Airport Blvd in austin is nowhere near the airport. Whose fucking idea was that. 

That's what happens when you move the airport, but not the roads around it

Today I learned the hard way that Airport Blvd in austin is nowhere near the airport. Whose fucking idea was that. 

I remember it causing issues for business guests the first few years after the move. IIRC, the residents didn’t want their address to change. Very Austin.

Though I could see her own thread I'm throwing this is here because I randomly found it. Props to the musicians for being able to focus on their music. 

 

Somebody should invent a "rent by mail" service for radar detectors.  I don't really speed anymore since I've had kids, but on some long-ass road trip, yeah I'm gonna do 10 over in the middle of Kansas.  It's only once a year so I'm not gonna buy one.  I assume a good one these days is probably a few hundred dollars, maybe more.  Been ages since I owned one.  So if you know your long-distance drive dates, you send 'em $30 or whatever and get it in time for your weeklong trip.  And then send it back in an envelope they provided already.  They receive it, make sure it's in working order, you get your deposit back and you're done with radar detectors for another year.  Summertime and Christmas would be "surge" pricing.  

Also, what if there are other Stallone Brothers we don't know about yet?  

Somebody should invent a "rent by mail" service for radar detectors.  I don't really speed anymore since I've had kids, but on some long-ass road trip, yeah I'm gonna do 10 over in the middle of Kansas.  It's only once a year so I'm not gonna buy one.  I assume a good one these days is probably a few hundred dollars, maybe more.  Been ages since I owned one.  So if you know your long-distance drive dates, you send 'em $30 or whatever and get it in time for your weeklong trip.  And then send it back in an envelope they provided already.  They receive it, make sure it's in working order, you get your deposit back and you're done with radar detectors for another year.  Summertime and Christmas would be "surge" pricing.  
Also, what if there are other Stallone Brothers we don't know about yet?  

I’d guess my V1 is like 15+ years old. At some point I stopped taking it down every time I got out of the car because I’ve long since blown past getting my moneys worth, but no one has grabbed it yet. Some kids even got in it one night when I left the doors unlocked and all they took was the change!

There used to be this magazine store down the block I frequented.  Yep. Before algore worked his magic on the internet.  Went there twice a week and most times I was the only customer in there.   So I went this one time and had to drop a load   When I got out the guy was mean mugging me.  I’m like “bro why do you think I buy magazines?”

On 3/1/2022 at 6:45 PM, NeverMarryAStripper said:

That's what happens when you move the airport, but not the roads around it

Airport still does go towards the airport. Just in the other direction now. 

On 2/24/2022 at 3:17 PM, Superhero said:

My wife got a pretty generous bonus this year. I guess her company did better than expected. It'll be bigger than my bonus, but don't care because it all goes to the same account.

But her company got bought last year and they will have to conform to the new company's standards - less cash bonus, more stocks.

I work for the same company as your wife and this pissed me off royally when I got my bonus deposit today.

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Coming up next month is the 54th anniversary of my friend’s death. He was KIA at age 24 about 4 months after this photo (Receiving his first Purple Heart) was taken.
My oldest son was born one month later and is named after him. RIP Steve.

 

099FE54E-6FBD-4386-BF78-2EC20D47766F.jpeg

20 minutes ago, closetohumping said:

If you must goto a Chinese buffet, skip the stir fry stuff.  Head straight for the tepanyaki 

Much like the salad bar at a Brazilian steak house, stir fry at Asian Buffet is for suckers!

1 hour ago, ABSR said:

Much like the salad bar at a Brazilian steak house, stir fry at Asian Buffet is for suckers!

So is the “sashimi”.  If I don’t check back in into this time tomorrow it was the buffet that got me

On 3/3/2022 at 7:39 PM, NorthLoop said:

I work for the same company as your wife and this pissed me off royally when I got my bonus deposit today.

Did I ever mention who my wife works for? Don't remember.

 

And yeah, the government does take its bite...

2 hours ago, Superhero said:

Did I ever mention who my wife works for? Don't remember.

I think we've talked about it before 

I don’t know when/where/how “it’s been a minute” has become a thing people say, but it’s fucking dumb

There is no teamwork (at least offensively) when 6/7 year olds play soccer. They're all prim donnas wanting to score the ball themselves.

Golf dork alert:

When the talking Heads say X player is a “good ball striker”.

Yea no shit Sherlock. That is why they play inside my television on Sunday. It’s not because they shank a 7 iron from 175 or hit a toe hook from 150 out with a 9 iron.

I’m in my late 40s and a 4 handicap and I can’t remember when I did those things. Maybe I should go on tour because I’m a good ball striker. Going to the dallas stars game next week but maybe after that I’ll give it a shot.

Somebody should invent a "rent by mail" service for radar detectors.  I don't really speed anymore since I've had kids, but on some long-ass road trip, yeah I'm gonna do 10 over in the middle of Kansas.  It's only once a year so I'm not gonna buy one.  I assume a good one these days is probably a few hundred dollars, maybe more.  Been ages since I owned one.  So if you know your long-distance drive dates, you send 'em $30 or whatever and get it in time for your weeklong trip.  And then send it back in an envelope they provided already.  They receive it, make sure it's in working order, you get your deposit back and you're done with radar detectors for another year.  Summertime and Christmas would be "surge" pricing.  
Also, what if there are other Stallone Brothers we don't know about yet?  
With all the shit cell phones can do now, I'm surprised there isn't an app for that.

It would be handy for me when I go to the country.

its so strange the difference in the speed as measured, and the speed as seen.

josh allen looks slow as all fuck but he clocks some of the better times here.  cam newton looks slow too.

 

This is a search for a coach in Southlake Carroll. This shows why their support creates success in so many sports. If this is the staff for new UIL sport Water Polo, what must football be like?

The selected Head Water-Polo Coach will also have two UIL Assistants, as assigned, to aid in the development and implementation of this ground-breaking UIL Program. Both Varsity Water-Polo and JV Water-Polo will be double-blocked and at separate times for best results in building an excellent overall Program.

I get that we scorched the sky to prevent solar power for the machines in “The Matrix”,  but why didn’t the machines just build wind farms instead of going through all the trouble of the human fields?   They obviously had the technology. 

On 3/3/2022 at 3:11 PM, Lobo said:

Somebody should invent a "rent by mail" service for radar detectors.  I don't really speed anymore since I've had kids, but on some long-ass road trip, yeah I'm gonna do 10 over in the middle of Kansas.  It's only once a year so I'm not gonna buy one.  I assume a good one these days is probably a few hundred dollars, maybe more.  Been ages since I owned one.  So if you know your long-distance drive dates, you send 'em $30 or whatever and get it in time for your weeklong trip.  And then send it back in an envelope they provided already.  They receive it, make sure it's in working order, you get your deposit back and you're done with radar detectors for another year.  Summertime and Christmas would be "surge" pricing.  

Also, what if there are other Stallone Brothers we don't know about yet?  

Just buy a V1. If you use it more than a few times under your proposed scheme, you'll come out ahead. And if it saves you even once, it'll be a bargain compared to the cost of fixing a ticket.

Unless a lot of people need to pay a premium to avoid the burden of storing something that's the between the size of a pack of cigarettes and a paperback book, it's not likely to be a sustainable business model. 

34 minutes ago, Lobo said:

I get that we scorched the sky to prevent solar power for the machines in “The Matrix”,  but why didn’t the machines just build wind farms instead of going through all the trouble of the human fields?   They obviously had the technology. 

 Because windmills cause cancer and kill all the birds. Duh. 

1 hour ago, Lobo said:

I get that we scorched the sky to prevent solar power for the machines in “The Matrix”,  but why didn’t the machines just build wind farms instead of going through all the trouble of the human fields?   They obviously had the technology. 

You're in the matrix. Don't question it.

I’m so annoyed by the catch phrases that pop up randomly from time to time. I see that “virtue signaling” is now edging out “chef’s kiss” for the most annoying term. 

30 minutes ago, Dbeasy said:

I’m so annoyed by the catch phrases that pop up randomly from time to time. I see that “virtue signaling” is now edging out “chef’s kiss” for the most annoying term. 

Bae

Why isnt there a business model where a sportsbook splits its profit with an athlete/team in exchange for promotion. 
 

thinking it most applies to things like combat sport where you may want to “support” an athlete. 
 

the book still maintains the same odds, so they ensure the “vig”. their business being a function of volume, a part of the vig is shared with the athlete who drive traffic to them. 
 

win/win/win for all parties. 

9 hours ago, Underdog said:

Egg salad sandwiches never disappoint. 

Especially if you never eat them.

I’m a fried egg sandwich guy myself. Two eggs. Take a toothpick or fork to break up the yolks so they spread out within their sacs. Flip them once, cook until they’re just slightly firm. A little runny is fine. Bacon and cheese are optional but well worth the extra effort. Whenever I fry bacon I always cook some slightly less than crisp so I can throw it in the microwave or on the grill for a minute to bring it up to speed later on. I grate my cheddar cheese in advance and let it come up to room temperature before I cook the eggs so it melts quickly. Mmmmmm. So good.

FES was a staple for breakfast and lunch growing up and will have them every so often, won’t go to that much trouble for them.  

Did a free, heavy booze brunch yesterday at a SXSW event.  Went to another "art activation" after that and ate like a half dozen deviled eggs around sunset.  

Not a great combination, speaking of eggs.  

16 hours ago, Underdog said:

Egg salad sandwiches never disappoint. 

Oh man, Friday, I really wanted an egg salad sandwich and I was just obsessing about it and I was like, 'Man, I'm gonna make one of those.' So Saturday, I went out and got, like, a dozen eggs and then I boiled them all and I just, I spent, I dunno, probably three hours, like three and a half hours making, you know, the mayonnaise, and the onions and paprika and, you know, the necessary accoutrement. And then, by the time I was done, I didn't really feel like like eating it.

And I didn’t have any bread.

Was that Mitch Hedberg or Pete Holmes?  I can't remember.  

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