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  • Last night I was having a dream where I was having sexy time with some random cute girl. And then out of nowhere the cute girl says, " let me try this" and then proceeds to stick her whole hand down h

  • 58 years ago today….  

  • Bullshit.  It's a dick move to knowingly jump in the express line with more items than allowed.  People get in that line to move quick.  It is their business if you fuck that up.

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#4352

I forget sometimes how much Steve used to look like a heroin addict.  

#4353

I just woke up from the most fucked up ptsd inspired dream I've had in a long time.  It was actual memories mixed with more fear inducing events mixed with psychotic thoughts and parilyzation... 

#4354

Shit man, sorry to hear that.  If you wanna talk about it here, happy to listen.  Certainly understand if you don't.  Here's to the day getting better for all of us...

#4356
19 minutes ago, Lobo said:

Shit man, sorry to hear that.  If you wanna talk about it here, happy to listen.  Certainly understand if you don't.  Here's to the day getting better for all of us...

Ah, it was just a dream.  So real that I was trying to remember what parts were true and what parts weren't.  

I dint really get that a lot so at least there's that.  It's one of the byproducts of a very strange life. 

#4358
I’m so annoyed by the catch phrases that pop up randomly from time to time. I see that “virtue signaling” is now edging out “chef’s kiss” for the most annoying term. 

Bae


0b5c1bb57f4456a3022909484c03c2fb.jpg
#4361
On 3/11/2022 at 10:07 AM, Dbeasy said:

I’m so annoyed by the catch phrases that pop up randomly from time to time. I see that “virtue signaling” is now edging out “chef’s kiss” for the most annoying term. 

"Narrative" is way overused right now. 

#4365

It seems like some company could come up with a unit that would wash all your clothes (your choice of whites or delicates or soiled kids stuff or whatever) and then go in to a dry mode. Just one unit. Throw your jeans and underwear and darks in and after 2ish hours they are ready to fold.

Seems like they would crush. Half the space in the laundry room. Sell the units for twice as much as a washer and dryer.

#4367
Goddamnit. Sandra Bullock is on Colbert’s show and apparently she hired the same plastic surgeon as Courteney Cox. 

May e screen shots would be good.
#4368
1 hour ago, markstanco said:

It seems like some company could come up with a unit that would wash all your clothes (your choice of whites or delicates or soiled kids stuff or whatever) and then go in to a dry mode. Just one unit. Throw your jeans and underwear and darks in and after 2ish hours they are ready to fold.

Seems like they would crush. Half the space in the laundry room. Sell the units for twice as much as a washer and dryer.

They do sell those.  They just aren’t that popular.

https://www.bestbuy.com/site/washers-dryers/washer-dryer-combos/pcmcat245000050019.c?id=pcmcat245000050019

#4369
3 hours ago, markstanco said:

It seems like some company could come up with a unit that would wash all your clothes (your choice of whites or delicates or soiled kids stuff or whatever) and then go in to a dry mode. Just one unit. Throw your jeans and underwear and darks in and after 2ish hours they are ready to fold.

Seems like they would crush. Half the space in the laundry room. Sell the units for twice as much as a washer and dryer.

Been around a long time

image.thumb.jpeg.3a12c6a4ac9fe84531ffc43fbfb7d4fd.jpeg

#4375
17 hours ago, markstanco said:

It seems like some company could come up with a unit that would wash all your clothes (your choice of whites or delicates or soiled kids stuff or whatever) and then go in to a dry mode. Just one unit. Throw your jeans and underwear and darks in and after 2ish hours they are ready to fold.

Seems like they would crush. Half the space in the laundry room. Sell the units for twice as much as a washer and dryer.

Had one in a furnished apartment. I went to the laundromat it was so bad. Would take hours and stuff still wouldn't be dry. 

#4378
5 minutes ago, closetohumping said:

Why can’t cars have gas tanks on both sides?

Because of the arrow on your dashboard.  And because you touch yourself at night.  On both sides, I might add.

#4380
2 hours ago, Longhornstampede said:

Why can't car companies install a belt driven alternator/generator that recharges the batteries while it's running?

Im sure someone smarter than me knows that answer by now.

uh...is someone gonna tell him nicely or...?

#4382
3 hours ago, Longhornstampede said:

Why can't car companies install a belt driven alternator/generator that recharges the batteries while it's running?

Im sure someone smarter than me knows that answer by now.

I know we are giving you shit, but is this a serious question? We have a dumb question thread. I suggest using it if you're serious and don't want to get ridiculed. 

#4383

Dealing with the general public sucks. I thought it was bad in health care but apparently it's also terrible in the tire business. Got a flat tire on my lunch break and drive to Discount Tire for a fix (tire warranty and the only place willing to operate on my Tesla). I'm chilling in the lobby and this happens as someone walks in 

Employee: Hey welcome to Discount Tire, how can I help you? 

Customer:.........excuse me? 

Employee: How can I help you? 

Customer: 1:30pm 

Employee: Okay. Do you have an appointment with us for 1:30pm? 

Customer: That's what I just said. I'm early and want service now. You're not busy at all. 

What the fuck is wrong with people? 

#4385

1. Anyone that orders from DoorDash, UberEats, etc. should never be allowed to say a word about inflation.

2. Who is ordering from these things? The prices seem outrageous and most food has a very limited shelf life. Someone ordering fast food? What? Who wants room temperature soggy fries?

#4386

People that don't enjoy sitting in drive-thru lines.  I think eventually, franchise owners of chain restaurants will realize their biggest waste of money is real estate if you're not slinging booze.  Just build out and lease a Wendy's kitchen outside of town at $20/foot instead of $40/foot, let delivery services come to you and deliver that shit to the customer directly who doesn't really need "the in-person Wendy's experience."  Whatever the fuck that is.  Ever since they got rid of the newspapers on the table, fuck 'em.

#4387

Had planned on skipping out of work early for MM but not only do I not get to leave early but fucking ended up staying late.  

#4388
11 hours ago, Moby Ric said:

The Oh no song by Kreepa or whoever the fuck it is makes me want to drown a bag of Kittens.

Oh No by Frank Zappa is a great song in all its permutations both lyrical and instrumental. I’ll post one of each. (And spare you a much longer dissertation about the song, the suites it appears in, and the general evolution of the music therein.)

 

#4389

I started dating my wife in 2006.  Started living together in 2009.  Married in 2011.  Kitchen towels are not my responsibility.  There are two towels hanging above the kitchen sink.  I still have no fucking clue what the difference and role of each towel is.

Edited by Patricio Swayze

#4390
7 hours ago, Patricio Swayze said:

I started dating my wife in 2006.  Started living together in 2009.  Married in 2011.  Kitchen towels are not my responsibility.  There are two towels hanging above the kitchen sink.  I still have no fucking clue what the difference and role of each towel is.

It doesn't matter. Don't touch/use either one of them or you will get them dirty.

 

#4391
9 hours ago, Patricio Swayze said:

I started dating my wife in 2006.  Started living together in 2009.  Married in 2011.  Kitchen towels are not my responsibility.  There are two towels hanging above the kitchen sink.  I still have no fucking clue what the difference and role of each towel is.

How else will the world know that “it’s always time for wine” or that you are “gnome for the holidays”?

#4392
10 hours ago, Patricio Swayze said:

I started dating my wife in 2006.  Started living together in 2009.  Married in 2011.  Kitchen towels are not my responsibility.  There are two towels hanging above the kitchen sink.  I still have no fucking clue what the difference and role of each towel is.

When one gets wet you use the other one.

#4396

Because Sucio Jose has other shit to do right now, okay.  Bus your own table! 

#4397
1 hour ago, Underdog said:

Why do sloppy joes have to be so damn messy?  

 Because if they weren’t then they’d be called neat joes. 

#4399
20 hours ago, Underdog said:

Why do sloppy joes have to be so damn messy?  

I haven’t had a sloppy joe in years. I’ve never had Manwich. My mom always made them from scratch. But out of curiosity I looked for Manwich at the grocery store today. I thought maybe I’d buy a can. Lay’s potato chips were even on sale and I’m a proponent of putting potato chips on a sloppy joe under the bun. I walked up and down both canned food aisles twice and they don’t have it.

 

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