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Texas Recruiting Notes 2022 - Idiotic Slapfights Unrelated To 2022 Recruiting

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1 hour ago, BurntOrange&White said:

image.png.c5f0e170d82c83338f2cef4f16ebaf1e.png

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Def gonna be giving this new recruiting coordinator my glizzy - Kendra Scott style. Gotta see if Woo got her number yet

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  • closetojumping
    closetojumping

    Thanks. I have been on the boards since 1997 when I was a student at Texas. We've spent decades as fans and board patrons feeling powerless to create any real change. The Internet, social media,

  • ChonkySalmon666
    ChonkySalmon666

    I work closely with a certain previously committed 5 star QB's father (hint: its Quinn Ewers, for those who haven't been following recruiting closely like I have) and chatted with him a bit this after

Posted Images

4 minutes ago, Hiphopopotamos said:

Get a load of these unoriginal fucking idiots:

 

Fucking embarrassing. 

6 minutes ago, Hiphopopotamos said:

Get a load of these unoriginal fucking idiots:

 

WTF is wrong with his hand?  Did he celebrate Maalik-mas 2.0 with a firework and JPP himself?

  • Author
6 minutes ago, Hiphopopotamos said:

Get a load of these unoriginal fucking idiots:

 

I keep saying this, but we've got to put some work in taking those frauds down a notch or two. They do far more harm than good. 

5 minutes ago, SydneyCarton said:

While I’m not the most coordinated soul alive, myself and a thousand other people saw you taken out comically by a knee high chain strung across two poles. Bold words.  
 

then again several of us pulled muscles laughing at you so I guess you gave some in return too, and for a split second you flew like Superman. 

I didn't even spill my drink. It was its own form of graceful. 

31 minutes ago, HenryJames said:

About 4" deep.

Look at Mr Stamina....banging her twice.

1 minute ago, closetojumping said:

I keep saying this, but we've got to put some work in taking those frauds down a notch or two. They do far more harm than good. 

I didn't even spill my drink. It was its own form of graceful. 

I know it didn’t happen that way, but when I replay it in my head I imagine it like a 30s era Mickey Mouse cartoon where your drink erupts from your cup like a volcano and then magically arcs in total back into the same cup 5 yards later after you face planted. 

  • Popular Post
3 hours ago, ousux said:

How may Hindi recruits are in the Texas top 100 anyway?

Disrespect Karthik "Jerry "Randy Moss" Rice" Akkihal at your own peril, good sir.

image.png

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  • Popular Post
5 minutes ago, closetohumping said:

She wouldn’t give 80% of guys on this board the time of day and would call the cops on half of them 

This reminds me of the time SLX put out an invite on Hornfans for an impromptu football HH one Sunday afternoon in Houston. I met up with him and we went to The Gingerman. Like 10-12 other sad and addicted bastards showed up and we bullshitted about recruiting for a few hours.

It was all fine, but one poster (whose name I'll leave out here in case he reads the boards still and decides to murder me) showed up and looked like he was a full-blown stereotype of a child molester or serial killer. Terrifying. He introduces himself and says his handle, which none of the rest of us had ever heard of, so I assumed he was mostly a lurker.

I compared notes with SLX as we were leaving and I'm like "did uhhh, anyone give you a bit of a creepy vibe back there?" and he proceeds to explode into laughter and run down his fears about the same dude. I go home and check out the dude's profile on Hornfans, and he has like 8000 posts. I'd never once noticed him, right there in plain sight. Anyway, I'm pretty sure he posts here as "futureman" with that level of volume and banality. Hornfans was like a year old at the time.

2 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

This reminds me of the time SLX put out an invite on Hornfans for an impromptu football HH one Sunday afternoon in Houston. I met up with him and we went to The Gingerman. Like 10-12 other sad and addicted bastards showed up and we bullshitted about recruiting for a few hours.

It was all fine, but one poster (whose name I'll leave out here in case he reads the boards still and decides to murder me) showed up and looked like he was a full-blown stereotype of a child molester or serial killer. Terrifying. He introduces himself and says his handle, which none of the rest of us had ever heard of, so I assumed he was mostly a lurker.

I compared notes with SLX as we were leaving and I'm like "did uhhh, anyone give you a bit of a creepy vibe back there?" and he proceeds to explode into laughter and run down his fears about the same dude. I go home and check out the dude's profile on Hornfans, and he has like 8000 posts. I'd never once noticed him, right there in plain sight. Anyway, I'm pretty sure he posts here as "futureman" with that level of volume and banality. Hornfans was like a year old at the time.

tim and eric smile GIF

3 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

This reminds me of the time SLX put out an invite on Hornfans for an impromptu football HH one Sunday afternoon in Houston. I met up with him and we went to The Gingerman. Like 10-12 other sad and addicted bastards showed up and we bullshitted about recruiting for a few hours.

It was all fine, but one poster (whose name I'll leave out here in case he reads the boards still and decides to murder me) showed up and looked like he was a full-blown stereotype of a child molester or serial killer. Terrifying. He introduces himself and says his handle, which none of the rest of us had ever heard of, so I assumed he was mostly a lurker.

I compared notes with SLX as we were leaving and I'm like "did uhhh, anyone give you a bit of a creepy vibe back there?" and he proceeds to explode into laughter and run down his fears about the same dude. I go home and check out the dude's profile on Hornfans, and he has like 8000 posts. I'd never once noticed him, right there in plain sight. Anyway, I'm pretty sure he posts here as "futureman" with that level of volume and banality. Hornfans was like a year old at the time.

I’d never be an advocate of fat fucks site again but that place was full of off topic laughs.  One girl there wrecked havoc and swindled multiple posters out of money.  One of the world’s greatest cons

  • Popular Post
3 minutes ago, satyanash said:

Disrespect Karthik "Jerry "Randy Moss" Rice" Akkihal at your own peril, good sir.

image.png

Exercise science?  
does an Indian kid have to come out to his parents as an exercise science major?  Or is that some sort of premed track?

  • Author
28 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

Yep, I'm going with "All Gas, No Brakes, But Several Banks" for this weekend. Not saying there won't be others like TJ, of course. 

Misread/misunderstood a text. Who the fuck knows. Sounds like it really is Murphy, instead. Banks could happen any time, for whatever that is worth, apparently. My bad, guys. I'm an idiot.

5 minutes ago, satyanash said:

Disrespect Karthik "Jerry "Randy Moss" Rice" Akkihal at your own peril, good sir.

image.png

That's your mother's brother's wife's younger sister's husband's brother's son. You know how that goes and you know it's true.

  • Author
2 minutes ago, RGBIII said:

tim and eric smile GIF

I'm not shitting you when I say this gif reminds me of that poster every time it is posted. 

4 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

I'm not shitting you when I say this gif reminds me of that poster every time it is posted. 

so weirder than meeting iconclasthorn at the shaggy happy hour?

15 minutes ago, satyanash said:

Disrespect Karthik "Jerry "Randy Moss" Rice" Akkihal at your own peril, good sir.

image.png

Slanging chapatis by day, to catching TDs by night 

6 hours ago, closetojumping said:

This reminds me of the time SLX put out an invite on Hornfans for an impromptu football HH one Sunday afternoon in Houston. I met up with him and we went to The Gingerman. Like 10-12 other sad and addicted bastards showed up and we bullshitted about recruiting for a few hours.

It was all fine, but one poster (whose name I'll leave out here in case he reads the boards still and decides to murder me) showed up and looked like he was a full-blown stereotype of a child molester or serial killer. Terrifying. He introduces himself and says his handle, which none of the rest of us had ever heard of, so I assumed he was mostly a lurker.

I compared notes with SLX as we were leaving and I'm like "did uhhh, anyone give you a bit of a creepy vibe back there?" and he proceeds to explode into laughter and run down his fears about the same dude. I go home and check out the dude's profile on Hornfans, and he has like 8000 posts. I'd never once noticed him, right there in plain sight. Anyway, I'm pretty sure he posts here as "futureman" with that level of volume and banality. Hornfans was like a year old at the time.

So what level of creepy are we talking about... blend into normal society creepy or wear your skin as a suit creepy?

200w.webp?cid=ecf05e47vqblt3qnb94uuolvvd

vs

200.webp?cid=ecf05e4796wu98ky6bz4mqq8thc

 

Edited by Laxtonto
Im a fuckhead

39 minutes ago, closetohumping said:

She wouldn’t give 80% of guys on this board the time of day and would call the cops on half of them 

Haha @Johnny Chimpo should regale us with his story from the Vickery Park happy hour.  I think that was also the time I met @SydneyCarton.  I didn’t think I could meet someone with a more intense personality than me haha.

26 minutes ago, 6th Street said:

Slanging chapatis by day, to catching TDs by night 

Last name Akkihal means they're probably Lingayats, who hail from Karnataka. So rotti would be more accurate.

2 hours ago, RGBIII said:

TFB

Can’t say what it is but sounds like there is a really good chance you all could be receiving some excellent news this weekend.

This is not in reference to the Trevell Johnson news. This is a separate piece of good news likely headed your way.

If anything changes, I’ll let you know. Stay tuned.

image.gif.8b754bd4f2d4ced034623d3a05a6ab13.gif
 

image.gif.e06d98772590a9a656a5688c4f386f13.gif

 

2 minutes ago, texifornia said:

Same school as Niaufe Tuihalamaka

Junior?

4 minutes ago, Pato del Muerto said:

The thing to say

on a cold Texas Maalikmas Day.

1 hour ago, UncleSonny said:

This reminded me how weird it is that Wade Phillips managed to produce a very attractive daughter. 

bzLjmfirbdLgvUky1wCqwdq-Didh_sbsT6jnZXpZ

 

She has a great scene as a belly dancer in "Charlie Wilson's War."

Eh. Iconic was a Herman thing. 

  • Popular Post
1 hour ago, ChonkySalmon666 said:

Def gonna be giving this new recruiting coordinator my glizzy - Kendra Scott style. Gotta see if Woo got her number yet

I think I am gonna start negging anyone that uses "glizzy" or "woo" on general principle.

5 hours ago, victory88 said:

If sark and this team win 9-10 games next year, it’s going to change the recruiting landscape.  

tenor.gif?itemid=20083500

So do we think Landon Hullaby has a commitable offer, given the staff's focus on Harris/Anderson/Allen (and possibly Kerr or Brooks, but not as clear) and that Guilbeau is already committed? If we're gonna take 6 then I would assume yes - if it's 5 than I feel like he could end up the odd man out, despite the fact that 9.95ers have said he's more of a when than and if. 

5 hours ago, Dijon Robinson said:

So Burton is saying this guy is set to be the assistant director of player personnel...we're really hiring the assistant director before the director himself

We hired the entire defensive staff before the DC

Nick Harris at 247 expects Trevell Johnson's announcement timeline to "stretch into next week." Texas still looks good.

Edited by Machinator

4 hours ago, RGBIII said:

She’s an Austin 2.5 but a Colombus 8

image.thumb.jpeg.c10c652d5981ea0587b89a68ef3b0279.jpeg

Stealthy sweater-puppies d&d love GIF by Hyper RPG

5 minutes ago, maninblack said:

We hired the entire defensive staff before the DC

so close. 

7549249.jpg

4 hours ago, Dr. Teeth said:

If Saban makes Valai look like a good coach, he needs to win a Nobel prize.

Nick just needs someone that's not worried about getting dirty. Valai fits the bill.

3 hours ago, RGBIII said:

TFB

Can’t say what it is but sounds like there is a really good chance you all could be receiving some excellent news this weekend.

This is not in reference to the Trevell Johnson news. This is a separate piece of good news likely headed your way.

If anything changes, I’ll let you know. Stay tuned.

 

A0BE549A-3ECA-466C-9011-8A401B9C50A0.jpeg

14 minutes ago, JackBurton said:

So do we think Landon Hullaby has a commitable offer, given the staff's focus on Harris/Anderson/Allen (and possibly Kerr or Brooks, but not as clear) and that Guilbeau is already committed? If we're gonna take 6 then I would assume yes - if it's 5 than I feel like he could end up the odd man out, despite the fact that 9.95ers have said he's more of a when than and if. 

It's commitable. TCU was working him during thr transition, just like Guilbeau.

2 minutes ago, texifornia said:

It's commitable. TCU was working him during thr transition, just like Guilbeau.

Word, bird in the hand and all that 

4 minutes ago, futureman said:

just wait. 

If it doesnt happen this weekend, what are you putting on the table? Or more aptly, up your ass?

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