Jump to content
View in the app

A better way to browse. Learn more.

Surly Horns

A full-screen app on your home screen with push notifications, badges and more.

To install this app on iOS and iPadOS
  1. Tap the Share icon in Safari
  2. Scroll the menu and tap Add to Home Screen.
  3. Tap Add in the top-right corner.
To install this app on Android
  1. Tap the 3-dot menu (⋮) in the top-right corner of the browser.
  2. Tap Add to Home screen or Install app.
  3. Confirm by tapping Install.

Featured Replies

And these fucking Gumps have me rolled up…the live music act is replacing lyrics with “Alabama” for whatever state it should be, and the locals here are predictably electrified over it.

 

Is this the most insecure, retarded state ever?

 

So far we’ve gone through Country Roads and I just heard “corner of Winslow, Alabama.”

 

Fucking kill me.

On 5/11/2021 at 9:03 PM, McCroskey said:

 

And these fucking Gumps have me rolled up…the live music act is replacing lyrics with “Alabama” for whatever state it should be, and the locals here are predictably electrified over it.

 

Is this the most insecure, retarded state ever?

 

So far we’ve gone through Country Roads and I just heard “corner of Winslow, Alabama.”

 

Fucking kill me.

 

Do you hear anyone tuning a banjo?

On 5/11/2021 at 9:03 PM, McCroskey said:

Fucking kill me.

Sure thing. Just lie down and be still. 

"At a bar in Alabama"  That's on you, man.  Life choices and whatnot.

only way that "at a bar in alabama" ever happens to me again is if i am guaranteed to witness @RDCanecutter and @Bama Chick sing a karaoke duet of "dixieland delight."

not shitting you when i say that when i was in some shithole in tuscloosa after the 2007 alabama-lsu game, some white trash girl literally started jacking some redneck off at a high table in the middle of the bar. i think i have a pic somewhere.

22 minutes ago, sidis said:

only way that "at a bar in alabama" ever happens to me again is if i am guaranteed to witness @RDCanecutter and @Bama Chick sing a karaoke duet of "dixieland delight."

The only Alabama songs I sing are "Zip City" by DBT, and "El Rey" by Vicente Fernandez.

No. Zip it. Shh. Quiet. Yoooo seeeee bienquestoyafuera.....

5 hours ago, Underdog said:

Mind if we dance with yo dates? 

 

You're in Alabama.  That's on you.  But this does seem odd.  There are a fucking million song referencing Alabama that they could just play if they want to appeal to the local sense of pride.

You could definitely score some points doing this in Iowa.  I can count on one hand the amount of songs anyone knows that reference or relate to Iowa, and it's usually wildly tangential (American Pie) or quite uncomplimentary (Turn the Page).  

On 5/13/2021 at 2:45 PM, sidis said:

only way that "at a bar in alabama" ever happens to me again is if i am guaranteed to witness @RDCanecutter and @Bama Chick sing a karaoke duet of "dixieland delight."

not shitting you when i say that when i was in some shithole in tuscloosa after the 2007 alabama-lsu game, some white trash girl literally started jacking some redneck off at a high table in the middle of the bar. i think i have a pic somewhere.

found the pic.  chick with blonde hair is actively jerking swisher sweets off at time of snap.  didn't know the dude pointing at the camera but i definitely remember that he took that girl home with him that night which was amusing.  left side of pic blobbed out to protect the innocent.

 

CIMG3217.thumb.JPG.723f1686be0fcca39c3517bad04ad6b5.JPG

We may have different definitions of both “jacking off” and of photographic evidence.

If it was aggy there would be multiple gumps, and she would be airtight. 

20 minutes ago, Blotto said:

If it was aggy there would be multiple gumps, and he would be airtight. 

fify

2 hours ago, WhatTheBuck said:

Point to the hands on the penis.

This may be a fetish best kept to yourself. 

4 hours ago, Underdog said:

This may be a fetish best kept to yourself. 

Or that I just have higher standards than some people for what counts as proof. Do I see a girl jacking off some guy in that pic? No I don’t. Neither do you. Maybe your fetish is that you’re too eager to believe that’s what you’re seeing. Ever consider that? 😛

On 5/13/2021 at 2:47 PM, baboso said:

"At a bar in Alabama"  That's on you, man.  Life choices and whatnot.

JB's Sports Bar, Come As You Are?

On 5/14/2021 at 6:12 PM, sidis said:

found the pic.  chick with blonde hair is actively jerking swisher sweets off at time of snap.  didn't know the dude pointing at the camera but i definitely remember that he took that girl home with him that night which was amusing.  left side of pic blobbed out to protect the innocent.

 

CIMG3217.thumb.JPG.723f1686be0fcca39c3517bad04ad6b5.JPG

Was this at Harry's?  

 

3 hours ago, hullabelew said:

Was this at Harry's?  

 

Harry's down by the railroad tracks? First place I ever saw a dude get thrown out of a bar Wild-West style.

Also, I am perfectly fine not seeing any pictures of Swisher Sweet's weenie.

Harry's down by the railroad tracks? First place I ever saw a dude get thrown out of a bar Wild-West style.
Also, I am perfectly fine not seeing any pictures of Swisher Sweet's weenie.
That's the place.
14 hours ago, hullabelew said:
15 hours ago, RDCanecutter said:
Harry's down by the railroad tracks? First place I ever saw a dude get thrown out of a bar Wild-West style.
Also, I am perfectly fine not seeing any pictures of Swisher Sweet's weenie.

That's the place.

Yep. I had a shack apartment (now gone of course) next to the tracks, I'd wander down to Harry's, drink some beer, then shuffle back home along the railroad tracks.

Tuscaloosa looks like a college town, but right under the surface, it's really a Tom Waits song.

I was in there one day and Harry comes in.  There are about 6 people doing some day time drinking.   He says, "Who wants some fuckin' pizza" to no one in particular, then orders about 20 pizzas to be delivered.   

Somewhere I still have a Crazy Bucket.  

22 hours ago, RDCanecutter said:

Yep. I had a shack apartment (now gone of course) next to the tracks, I'd wander down to Harry's, drink some beer, then shuffle back home along the railroad tracks.

Tuscaloosa looks like a college town, but right under the surface, it's really a Tom Waits song.

 

23 minutes ago, hullabelew said:

I was in there one day and Harry comes in.  There are about 6 people doing some day time drinking.   He says, "Who wants some fuckin' pizza" to no one in particular, then orders about 20 pizzas to be delivered.   

Somewhere I still have a Crazy Bucket.  


How were the bellinis?

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

Configure browser push notifications

Chrome (Android)
  1. Tap the lock icon next to the address bar.
  2. Tap Permissions → Notifications.
  3. Adjust your preference.
Chrome (Desktop)
  1. Click the padlock icon in the address bar.
  2. Select Site settings.
  3. Find Notifications and adjust your preference.