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Featured Replies

I understand there's a "help" board but from what I've seen, the content there centers around do it yourself projects. I'm in a bind though.  We just returned to the office at work and sure enough I have a female manager now.  As I was returning to lunch today, she asked if I was smuggling a 9 inch cucumber in my pants and said "you better stifle that thing when you're visiting customers."  10 minutes ago she just asked if I wanted to hit the treadmill in the basement gym.  I feel like I'm being sexually harassed and I had no response to the cucumber comment.  I just sort of walked off.  Should I have said "that's not a cucumber and you're sexually harrassing me" or just let it go.  How should I handle this moving forward?  Please excuse any typos as it's hard to type while running on a treadmill.

4 minutes ago, closetohumping said:

I understand there's a "help" board but from what I've seen, the content there centers around do it yourself projects. I'm in a bind though.  We just returned to the office at work and sure enough I have a female manager now.  As I was returning to lunch today, she asked if I was smuggling a 9 inch cucumber in my pants and said "you better stifle that thing when you're visiting customers."  10 minutes ago she just asked if I wanted to hit the treadmill in the basement gym.  I feel like I'm being sexually harassed and I had no response to the cucumber comment.  I just sort of walked off.  Should I have said "that's not a cucumber and you're sexually harrassing me" or just let it go.  How should I handle this moving forward?  Please excuse any typos as it's hard to type while running on a treadmill.

You should have asked her how much salad dressing she'd like on her tossed cucumber salad.

I think you should fess up and pull that cucumber out.

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I bet you complain about not having seatbelts in the back seat of a taxi

1 hour ago, closetohumping said:

I understand there's a "help" board but from what I've seen, the content there centers around do it yourself projects. I'm in a bind though.  We just returned to the office at work and sure enough I have a female manager now.  As I was returning to lunch today, she asked if I was smuggling a 9 inch cucumber in my pants and said "you better stifle that thing when you're visiting customers."  10 minutes ago she just asked if I wanted to hit the treadmill in the basement gym.  I feel like I'm being sexually harassed and I had no response to the cucumber comment.  I just sort of walked off.  Should I have said "that's not a cucumber and you're sexually harrassing me" or just let it go.  How should I handle this moving forward?  Please excuse any typos as it's hard to type while running on a treadmill.

Did you tell her your real name was "Close to Humping?"  

So, you're upset there's no longer a male manager asking you this?

59 minutes ago, midtown said:

I bet you complain about not having seatbelts in the back seat of a taxi

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Nah, no one with a nine inch cucumber gets on the internet to post this story.

13 hours ago, MissingInAction said:

Gonna need pics of manager. As you already fucking know.

I'm sensing the real issue is that she's not very good looking.

Did you lose a couple inches off your cucumber in an accident or something?

8 hours ago, Underdog said:

9" cucumber?

 

Mine's bigger.

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