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Jimbo 2019: The Only Tail Getting Busted is Candi's

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11 minutes ago, Machinator said:

I could be wrong, but I think everything in that post besides the Koda Martin news was parody.

Kinda like the Aggy program?

 

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57 minutes ago, Gut Wagon said:

If the story hadn’t evolved to focus on Red, it eventually would have become about someone else. In the land of toy soldiers, there must always be a fort to attack.  

yeah, their default whenever they would lose out on a recruit was to claim we cheat, which is ironic considering the only post-WW2 modicum of success their program has ever experienced was when they were cheating their assess off, but the personification of Uncle Red as the one who does the paying really just makes it more entertaining to read.

 

Feel bad for the kid, hopefully he recovers.  Losing Koda Martin in season or for the season for this or a followup injury would be such a huge huge hit for probably the only halfway decent position group on that team.

Wonder if we hear much more shit talking about Herman's emphasis on hydration and the pee chart now? In the same week as one of the most influential trainers in Houston gushes about our strength and conditioning coach and his results, aggy's coach almost kills their starting LT.

7 minutes ago, Enchubben said:

Feel bad for the kid, hopefully he recovers.  Losing Koda Martin in season or for the season for this or a followup injury would be such a huge huge hit for probably the only halfway decent position group on that team.

Wonder if we hear much more shit talking about Herman's emphasis on hydration and the pee chart now? In the same week as one of the most influential trainers in Houston gushes about our strength and conditioning coach and his results, aggy's coach almost kills their starting LT.

I think Koda had already been moved to backup before this happened, but yes, this would be a big blow to their depth 

3 hours ago, nycHorn said:

I like the part about the old coaching staff would have let their jam play out before going to help their student athlete.

Texags was sucking Sumlin off repeatedly up until all the QBs transferred.  Calling him the Cobra.  #WRTS bullshit.

5 minutes ago, Fud said:

I think Koda had already been moved to backup before this happened, but yes, this would be a big blow to their depth 

That OL is trash.  Starkel is going to get killed by Clemson.

10 minutes ago, Fud said:

I think Koda had already been moved to backup before this happened, but yes, this would be a big blow to their depth 

Think they put Dan Moore at LT.  Not sure if that's an upgrade or not.  He's a Guard.

19 minutes ago, Enchubben said:

Feel bad for the kid, hopefully he recovers.  Losing Koda Martin in season or for the season for this or a followup injury would be such a huge huge hit for probably the only halfway decent position group on that team.

Wonder if we hear much more shit talking about Herman's emphasis on hydration and the pee chart now? In the same week as one of the most influential trainers in Houston gushes about our strength and conditioning coach and his results, aggy's coach almost kills their starting LT.

And that same trainer is bringing Javonne Shepherd to visit Texas this weekend.  I hope they negative recruiting the fuck out of this since Jimbo has been spewing lies about locker room turmoil and other shit.

8 minutes ago, Elmer_Fudd said:

That OL is trash.  Starkel is going to get killed by Clemson.

They might have to start Mond and move him out of the pocket a lot 

How does one get a heat stroke in the first week of April? Excessive Dehydration due to overtraining? 

7 minutes ago, Neonmoon said:

How does one get a heat stroke in the first week of April? Excessive Dehydration due to overtraining? 

That's what I was thinking.  It's fucking 70 degrees outside.

1 hour ago, Machinator said:

I could be wrong, but I think everything in that post besides the Koda Martin news was parody.

I legitimately double-checked on my phone to see if the poster was rickyspub.  Are they really claiming that seeing your LT collapse on the field is considered attention to detail? Wouldn't attention to detail be to properly hydrate your players and see to their safety so they never get to that point? JFC aggy.

4 minutes ago, UT Lawnghorn said:

I legitimately double-checked on my phone to see if the poster was rickyspub.  Are they really claiming that seeing your LT collapse on the field is considered attention to detail? Wouldn't attention to detail be to properly hydrate your players and see to their safety so they never get to that point? JFC aggy.

No, I would have fucked it up by saying that Jimbo coaches so hard that his current girlfriend was found getting "serviced" by a hunk on the meat judging team.

8 hours ago, LoneStarBiker said:

Nickname for Starkel - Nick “the Pick”

He already has a nickname, now do it right! 

3 picks in 20 minutes...against the scout team D, which now Daylon Mack is apparently a member of.  But it wasn't his fault because it hit 6ft 1in Daylon in the helmet.  But the point of all of that was to point out Jimbo's attention to detail because Starkel's chin was in the wrong position and he noticed a 300+lb offensive lineman fucking collapsed and almost died on the field?  He sounds like a regular Sherlock Holmes.

Jesus fucking Christ.

9 hours ago, Lobwedgephil said:

Nick threw his third interception in the 20 minutes I was able to watch, but this one didn't appear to be his fault as it glanced off Daylon Mack's helmet.

I'm thinking more than one person needs to step up their parody game. This was pretty funny...one of the INT's wasn't the QB's fault because his pass hit the 5 foot 2 rotund DL fidget's helmet...lol.  Lobwedgephil strikes.

Daylon  has lost seven pounds and was working at safety to add some depth and speed at that position you durn sips!  Jimbo's attention to detail is strong and he wants the right fits at each spot on the field.    He knows a fast 5'10" roundturd like Daylon is an upgrade for the defensive backfield and he was only going to see a few snaps per game on the DL.   Daylon got his head around and made a play on the ball.  

Sumlin was the Cobra because that's what he drank.

"Ass My Dude" won't just get killed by Clemson. He'll get killed by every P5 team on the schedule.

Not surprised about the heat stroke. C'mon now, don't you know it's 30 degrees hotter on an $-E-C playing field? It's to be expected!

"But it wasn't his fault because it hit 6ft 1in Daylon in the helmet."

 

Was he on the sidelines at the time?

1 hour ago, Doc Sam Beckett said:

He already has a nickname, now do it right! 

Isn’t Starkel ass my dude?

7 minutes ago, Leanderman said:

"But it wasn't his fault because it hit 6ft 1in Daylon in the helmet."

 

Was he on the sidelines at the time?

Knowing Mack he was probably standing straight up with his hands behind his head trying to catch his breath.

2 hours ago, Neonmoon said:

How does one get a heat stroke in the first week of April? Excessive Dehydration due to overtraining? 

He may have an underlying medical condition that made him susceptible to it. We had a few guys in the military with sickle cell trait (not saying he has that, just an example) that ended up with severe heat stroke despite never having had any apparent prior issues exercising, running, etc.

4 hours ago, billfromlaketravis said:

Way to bury the headline there Gabe. 

Nick Starkel threw an interception during practice and..... the starting LT almost died. 

 

Jimbo heroically coaches fast.

You! Keep your chin up and don't cross your eyes! You! Don't just lie there dying, hit the ice bath! Daylon, excellent helmet technique!

Get that cat out of here! Forceps! Next play! Stat!

6 minutes ago, RomaVicta said:

Jimbo heroically coaches fast.

Candi knows all about Jimbo being fast...

50 minutes ago, Spawn of Cthulhu said:

He may have an underlying medical condition that made him susceptible to it. We had a few guys in the military with sickle cell trait (not saying he has that, just an example) that ended up with severe heat stroke despite never having had any apparent prior issues exercising, running, etc.

It is pretty safe to rule out sickle cell.

0035331-moke-1280x720.jpg

2 minutes ago, ShaggyBevo RIP said:

It is pretty safe to rule out sickle cell.

0035331-moke-1280x720.jpg

You fell for it! That's actually Eddie Murphy.

(TexAgs reporter showing Koda her "death grip of pleasure".)

7 minutes ago, ShaggyBevo RIP said:

It is pretty safe to rule out sickle cell.

0035331-moke-1280x720.jpg

Dude, race is just a social construct. Perhaps he suffers from excessive albinism.

1 hour ago, BoomMF said:

70º in the SEC is 108º in the BDF. /aggy

It was much hotter at practice because of all of coach brew’s fire emojis.

Quote

Now under the old regime, he would have been there a while or at least until the next song changed, but the attention to detail of coach noticed this before the next play, and saved his life. 

Is he claiming that Sumlin would just just left him passed out on the field?

1 hour ago, ShaggyBevo RIP said:

It is pretty safe to rule out sickle cell.

0035331-moke-1280x720.jpg

Wouldve never guessed

17 minutes ago, Post Oak said:

Wouldve never guessed

Wait, Koda isn't a popular first name in the black community?

What about Liam? Austin? Wylder?

Poking around, Koda married Dino Babers' daughter Jazzmin(aggy volleyball).  Dino is a good guy to have counsel with if you're trying to decide if it is time to hang up the cleats and go the coaching rout.

Best of luck to Koda.

Edited by ShaggyBevo RIP

54 minutes ago, Texas Wahoo said:

Is he claiming that Sumlin would just just left him passed out on the field?

Sumlin would have thought he was drunk and passed out.

7 hours ago, Big D said:

That Jerry dude is so perfect for aggy.  I can remember him on the sidelines screaming at the other teams players when they were close to the OU sucks  sidelines.  At times almost to the point of chest bumping them and what looked like he was about to get flagged.  Then he would quietly disapper behind players.  Just a perfect aggy.

His sideline antics, making players eat puke & rumors about liking boys. Perfect for aggy is right.

3 minutes ago, Goodman said:

His sideline antics, making players eat puke & rumors about liking boys. Perfect for aggy is right.

Hamm can show him all the prime bathroom locations on campus and maybe get his press credentials back.

It's hilarious to read the gagem' board and see the posters get high hopes and think is going to land high rated OOS recruits.

He knows how to win the national championship. He recruits nationally and finds the best 4- and 5-star players. He coaches fast. His quarterbacks learn how to handoff the football and not cross their eyes.

Power moves will pick the Texas class clean before it's all over. It would have happened this past season if not for the early signing date.

tumblr_lz1a99qC7C1qemz6qo1_500.gif

Kid was dehydrated. I know we make fun of Herman for the water bottle shit, but apparently it's very important.

21 minutes ago, HtownHorn said:

Kid was dehydrated. I know we make fun of Herman for the water bottle shit, but apparently it's very important.

Getting dehydrated during a practice in the 70s is weird. Either he went hard the night before, he has an underlying health problem, or they practice like the junction boys 

4 hours ago, Casual Encounter said:

Sumlin would have thought he was drunk and passed out.

He would’ve had Spav help him to his room.

8 hours ago, Fud said:

Getting dehydrated during a practice in the 70s is weird. Either he went hard the night before, he has an underlying health problem, or they practice like the junction boys 

Supplements can be a factor, too.

3 hours ago, Tex Pete said:

Supplements can be a factor, too.

Yup. You take creatine without sufficient hydration and it can fuck you up.

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