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Featured Replies

6 hours ago, Cheeseweasel said:

Looks like I picked a bad week to stop sniffing glue...

 

 

I hope they're adding her and others that act like assholes to the no fly list. If they're not doing that they should at least add a couple of con air seats on every plane where staff can gag and bag some passengers for the duration of the flight.

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    MissingInAction

    Spirit needs to pick up some Popeyes employees out of the portal.

  • Since we don’t have a flight thread of badasses I thought I’d put this here. RIP to that beautiful courageous lady.    Full text of the Tweet: Neerja Bhanot was a 22-year-old flight a

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1 minute ago, Grade of D as in David said:

where staff can gag and bag some passengers for the duration of the flight.

You gotta pay extra for that.

12 minutes ago, Cheeseweasel said:

Spirit Airlines vibes

I missed the startup of MegaPlane Airlines. 

1 minute ago, Cheeseweasel said:

You gotta pay extra for that.

I would pay double if they actually did that. Although if flight prices doubled then we wouldn't have as many of the Applebee's crowd flying so let's make it happen.

 

This guy’s Twitter has more on his saga (“trying to get to Tel Aviv” which is I guess a good name for a song) but damn people suck. Total assholes on flights lately. 

11 minutes ago, Nicole44 said:

This guy’s Twitter has more on his saga (“trying to get to Tel Aviv” which is I guess a good name for a song) but damn people suck. Total assholes on flights lately. 

It is only a 10hr flight. It would have taken about the same length of time to just continue on to Tel Aviv.

The anticipation for this summer's flying season is absolutely delicious cause I ain't flying nowhere, bitches!

38 minutes ago, Nicole44 said:

This guy’s Twitter has more on his saga (“trying to get to Tel Aviv” which is I guess a good name for a song) but damn people suck. Total assholes on flights lately. 

I would be beyond irate. I honestly think sky marshalls should just taze motherfuckers like this, handcuff them, and throw them in plane jail for the rest of the flight. Build a fucking cage in planes. Once the sane people flock to those airlines to avoid nutsos like this, every airline will behave the same way. Put it in your terms of service that you can be tazed and handcuffed and go to town on these fuckfaces that ruin everything for everyone around them. 

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Greyhound should jump all over this. Just show video of a bunch of shitty air passengers and cut to...

Greyhound, we will just kick you off the bus.

"Greyhound...Sure we have unruly passengers too, but there's no phone chargers or wi-fi so chances are your shitty behavior won't be documented for the ages."

3 minutes ago, SydneyCarton said:

I would be beyond irate. I honestly think sky marshalls should just taze motherfuckers like this, handcuff them, and throw them in plane jail for the rest of the flight. Build a fucking cage in planes. Once the sane people flock to those airlines to avoid nutsos like this, every airline will behave the same way. Put it in your terms of service that you can be tazed and handcuffed and go to town on these fuckfaces that ruin everything for everyone around them. 

Maybe in the contract make them libel for any airline expenses of other flyers - missed connections, hotel stays, etc.

1 hour ago, Bevo said:

Maybe in the contract make them libel for any airline expenses of other flyers - missed connections, hotel stays, etc.

*Liable. And would require a civil suit. I’m too lazy for that.  Tazing and airplane jail is quicker, cheaper, and satisfies instant gratification. 

2 hours ago, Bevo said:

It is only a 10hr flight. It would have taken about the same length of time to just continue on to Tel Aviv.

 

5EDF401B-BDEE-4BF6-8534-24E56614388A.gif.bbe4326dd7a34f4208af18fdbecaf8d0.gif

10=3

19 hours ago, Gatorubet said:

Thank you.  United to London next month and no chance of seeing you and your popcorn spewing spawn. 

We're flying Aeromexico to London next month.

I'm pretty sure you're allowed to set spare seats on fire to roast corn on AM.

20 minutes ago, rage-a-holic said:

We're flying Aeromexico to London next month.

I'm pretty sure you're allowed to set spare seats on fire to roast corn on AM.

I like the Polaris Pods on United.

I need to figure out all the of the intricacies of the Star Alliance Network so I can get some decent transatlantic fares on points.  Heretofore I’m too stupid and/or lazy.

52 minutes ago, rage-a-holic said:

We're flying Aeromexico to London next month.

I'm pretty sure you're allowed to set spare seats on fire to roast corn on AM.

They call that "elote". 

Pos rep for proper usage of 'elote'  

Of course with this guy, you have to wonder where he gets the 'mayo cream' from.  Could be HEB, could be row 9.  Who can say for sure?  

Seems a good time link my friend's attitude on A.M. airplane snackums with no regard for human life (but it's a lovely lesson on progressive tolerance): 

 

Edited by YGIFS

1 hour ago, rage-a-holic said:

We're flying Aeromexico to London next month.

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Edited by Dnaguy

32 minutes ago, mdmost said:

They call that "elote". 

Mayonnaise sucks!!!!

6 hours ago, Grade of D as in David said:

I hope they're adding her and others that act like assholes to the no fly list. If they're not doing that they should at least add a couple of con air seats on every plane where staff can gag and bag some passengers for the duration of the flight.

I've been seeing some fairly tense moments but I haven't encountered this shit full on just yet. A lady cried and wailed for an entire flight from New Orleans to San Antonio. Saw two Hispanic dudes call each other "nigga" and "bitch" for two minutes straight, which a few black dudes found really amusing. But I haven't gotten the incendiary, full blown psychos yet. 

Were the two black dudes named Arthur and his brother?  

16 hours ago, SydneyCarton said:

I would be beyond irate. I honestly think sky marshalls should just taze motherfuckers like this, handcuff them, and throw them in plane jail for the rest of the flight. Build a fucking cage in planes. Once the sane people flock to those airlines to avoid nutsos like this, every airline will behave the same way. Put it in your terms of service that you can be tazed and handcuffed and go to town on these fuckfaces that ruin everything for everyone around them. 

Hand them a parachute and open up the door. "We'll alert the coast guard to your approximate location"

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20 minutes ago, Cheeseweasel said:

Need to boot that smart ass trying to escalate the problem too.

Impossible. She has an American Express in her pocket. 

14 hours ago, YGIFS said:

Pos rep for proper usage of 'elote'  

Of course with this guy, you have to wonder where he gets the 'mayo cream' from.  Could be HEB, could be row 9.  Who can say for sure?  

Seems a good time link my friend's attitude on A.M. airplane snackums with no regard for human life (but it's a lovely lesson on progressive tolerance): 

 

That's a good one.   Another great bit by him is sitting next to the couple getting it on while he's getting drunk on the plane.

The Spaniards?   I love that bit.  Every decent comic has a bit about air travel since they do it so much and it’s ripe with awkward material.  But Kyle and Louie CK are in a different stratosphere when it comes to it.  

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On 4/25/2023 at 2:10 PM, Guadaloopy said:

Rule number one that I get from this page is "Don't go to Orlando".  Rule number two is "In the event you have to break rule number one, definitely don't fucking fly to Orlando."

/Checks schedule
sees conference in Orlando next week
dies a little inside

20 hours ago, Cheeseweasel said:

Need to boot that smart ass trying to escalate the problem too.

Best ground the whole flight, to be safe. 

22 hours ago, YGIFS said:

The Spaniards?   I love that bit.  Every decent comic has a bit about air travel since they do it so much and it’s ripe with awkward material.  But Kyle and Louie CK are in a different stratosphere when it comes to it.  

Louis ck jerking it on Make a GIF

9 minutes ago, Crapinon said:

Holy shit.

 

Baker, a diagnosed schizophrenic, killed Tim McLean, a young carnival worker who was a complete stranger to Baker, in 2008. A year later he was found not criminally responsible due to mental illness. 

 

Isn't "diagnosed schizophrenic" and "carnival worker" redundant?

21 minutes ago, Cheeseweasel said:

Holy shit.

 

Baker, a diagnosed schizophrenic, killed Tim McLean, a young carnival worker who was a complete stranger to Baker, in 2008. A year later he was found not criminally responsible due to mental illness. 

 

Isn't "diagnosed schizophrenic" and "carnival worker" redundant?

The guy beheaded and cannibalized was the carnival worker. Schizophrenic was just a bus passenger who decided he should cut off his head. With a knife. In the back of the bus....

1 minute ago, Crapinon said:

The guy beheaded and cannibalized was the carnival worker. 

Oh. That makes it better. Nevermind.

Motherfucker REALLY wanted to get to Longview. (NSFW audio)

Edited by Gil Bang

34 minutes ago, Gil Bang said:

Motherfucker REALLY wanted to get to Longview. (NSFW audio)

Damn it. It was just getting good.

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What dumb motherfucker pays $2000 to go to Longview. Longview will have to pay me $2000 to go to Longview.

There has got be a planned/planted reality show in here somewhere.  Where you show the person getting into a ruckus at the gate/on the flight...but then most important-you show what happens when they finally get to their destination.  And it's just this series of letdowns like they got into all that trouble and spent all that money to get to Shreveport or Tucson to see what their Chili's is like in that town as compared to their town.  

A melee?  A fracas?  Perhaps a rumpus?  

Of all the lines John Hughes wrote, some of which get me choked up and some of which make me double over in laughter...the best one of all is "Yeah, does Barry Manilow know that you raid his wardrobe?"  As a kid, I knew it was funny...but as an adult I appreciate that Bender is so damn quick and clever in the moment that you knew he was gonna win.  And the "hook 'em" that Vernon throws up is so fucking epic....I don't know why we don't put that up on the jumbotron at football games.  I guess 'cause Vernon is an overpaid has-been.  Oh wait, that describes most of our head coaches.  

Frontier airlines…I thought screaming at the woman and calling her a River rat was an interesting touch…

 

Some discount airline needs to use all these videos for some kinda marketing campaign that basically says, "See?  We're all the fucking same.  Every airline has a shithead on every flight.  Don't matter.  Be cool, calm, and collected.  Don't want no shit before landing?  Don't start no shit after takeoff."  

I mean yeah, Spirit does seem to get more than its share of trash, but when it comes to domestic travel---I've seen shit on SWA, America, United, Frontier, Hawaiin, Alaskan, Virgin.  Only airline I've flown a lot that never got sideways was Delta...but I guess I just jinxed my next flight.  I typed as I looked over the terminal and say a dude chugging 4loko's he got through security before we board.

1 hour ago, crash_davis said:

What dumb motherfucker pays $2000 to go to Longview. Longview will have to pay me $2000 to go to Longview.

Pretty sure he's talking about Longview, WA but the sentiment still stands.

And Longview is just across the river from Portland, so I cannot imagine why anyone would pay $2K to fly from Methford to Longview because it's only about a 5 hour drive.

Maybe he realized he wasn't in any condition to drive.

1 hour ago, ftf82 said:

Maybe he realized he wasn't in any condition to drive.

After 3 margaritas, I'm guessing he though he could fly the plane.

On 4/25/2023 at 8:46 PM, Chooky said:

But I haven't gotten the incendiary, full blown psychos yet. 

If you didn't see the psycho, the psycho might be you. Maybe you dominated the lesser humans, but took a nap and forgot about it.

6 hours ago, Beau Vine said:

Pretty sure he's talking about Longview, WA but the sentiment still stands.

And Longview is just across the river from Portland, so I cannot imagine why anyone would pay $2K to fly from Methford to Longview because it's only about a 5 hour drive.

He is, Longview aka East Texas Regional only flies to DFW and back. If you ever have the misfortune of flying out of there take the first morning flight of the day as it’s likely the only one that will not be delayed.

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