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(I kind of wish this had happened when he was at Bama. Because I would pay all kinds of money to watch Saban go all stripper spider monkey on the first reporter who asked him about it.)

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  • Did anyone mention the possibility that the kid was trick or treating and hoping to find a house that was giving out Rhesus?

  • Hank Scorpio
    Hank Scorpio

    We’ve all been there, it’s Halloween, you left your wife and kids for a stripper so you don’t even remember that until you see a kid in a pirate costume, you’re trying to study film to come up with an

Posted Images

i know what DKR needs to unveil at the next home game:
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Could this be an “anti-rally” monkey? Asking for Sark.
9 minutes ago, sidis said:

a kid wandering into someone else's backyard where there was a monkey in a cage that bit the nosy kid is creating all this dramatic twitter fervor?  or is it just that the non-surly longhorn community is just now finding out about pole assassin and they can't stop giggling?

god damn you fuckers are bored.  pandemic broke you people.

It’s just not college football fans in general. There are a lot of Longhorn fans that had no idea about Pole Assassin and the monkey.

whatever, it’s the best I’ve felt about the football program since the OSU game.

12 hours ago, dcar00 said:

that's funny, when Banks met her she said she was working towards her law degree...

She meant Law of the Jungle degree.

  • Popular Post
(I kind of wish this had happened when he was at Bama. Because I would pay all kinds of money to watch Saban go all stripper spider monkey on the first reporter who asked him about it.)

Guarantee SID has told all the gutless wonders who cover Texas that they ask Sark about this they get their press credential pulled.

That said let’s say we get out to a lead Saturday night and hold it for a win. Anybody ballsy enough to ask “So how did it feel to get that monkey off your back?” In post game.

If the ISU band doesn't play something like Shock The Monkey or We're The Monkees during the game Saturday I will be severely disappointed.

ETA - Or The Beatles' Everybody's Got Something To Hide Except For Me And My Monkey.

Edited by Scheiss Meister

Somebody oughta shop the monkey riding Bevo chasing a bunch of costumed kids and UGA around.

if someone doesn't have dana carvey Mike Myers/sprockets at gameday I will have a disappoint.

Edited by dcar00

30 minutes ago, sidis said:

a kid wandering into someone else's backyard where there was a monkey in a cage that bit the nosy kid is creating all this dramatic twitter fervor?  or is it just that the non-surly longhorn community is just now finding out about pole assassin and they can't stop giggling?

god damn you fuckers are bored.  pandemic broke you people.

What else are we going to talk about?  Our football team?

if someone doesn't have dana carvey/sprockets at gameday I will have a disappoint.

Ahem

giphy.gif
2 hours ago, TriStone said:

 

I'm going to give her the benefit of the doubt and assume this explanation is accurate.  Fuck that nosy little trespassing shithead.

 

Legit LOL’d at the handwritten “Emotional Support Animal Do Not Touch” sign. She still probably should completely turn off the Twitter and Instagram machines. 

4 hours ago, Francisco 2.0 said:

So, who made the call to The Wolf?  

4wKme.jpg

 

 

tangent: some consider the big secret of Pulp Fiction is what is the briefcase. I've always wanted to know what kind of party does someone throw at 8am where people are dressed like this.

1 minute ago, Surly Bevo said:


Ahem

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ha. yeah whoops wrong waynes world dude.

1 hour ago, ClubWhatever said:

All publicity is good publicity.  Milk the shit out of the rogue monkey

From the "Paris Hilton/Kardashian School of Public Relations"?

I think CDC should give the monkey a booth on Bevo Blvd. 5 minutes before the game monkey dons a specially made jet pack (monkeys were first in space) and flies into the stadium where ha lands in the waiting arms of Beef Supreme (Vince) riding high atop Bevo. The band hits the drum roll to The Eyes the monkey extends a well trained hook ‘em and then they slowly saunter down the field as the band plays and gore the opposing coach to the crowd’s delight.

Fuck it Full Idiocracy.

Can you imagine Banks ex having to send her kids over to his house.  Just let them have a hand grenade fight in the middle of a busy freeway.  If I had to pick I would go with the grenade fight. 

4 hours ago, Gooby said:

Did anyone mention the possibility that the kid was trick or treating and hoping to find a house that was giving out Rhesus?

Take your pos rep and the fuck out of here 

7 minutes ago, Nice Guy Eddie said:

tangent: some consider the big secret of Pulp Fiction is what is the briefcase. I've always wanted to know what kind of party does someone throw at 8am where people are dressed like this.

https://movies.stackexchange.com/questions/88248/where-is-mr-wolf-seen-to-be-present-in-his-introduction-scene-in-pulp-fiction

From the script.  Illegal gambling in hotel suite in LA.  Also, while he's on the phone,  you can hear "place your bets" in the background a few times.

Quote
INT. HOTEL SUITE – MORNING

           The CAMERA looks through the bedroom doorway of a hotel suite 
           into the main area. We SEE a crap game being played on a 
           fancy crap table by GAMBLERS in tuxedos and LUCKY LADIES in 
           fancy evening gowns. The CAMERA PANS to the right revealing: 
           Sitting on a bed, phone in hand with his back to us, the 
           tuxedo-clad WINSTON WOLF aka "THE WOLF". We also see The 
           Wolf has a small notepad that he jots details in.

 

 

Edited by Francisco 2.0

12 minutes ago, stork642 said:

Can you imagine Banks ex having to send her kids over to his house.  Just let them have a hand grenade fight in the middle of a busy freeway.  If I had to pick I would go with the grenade fight. 

This dude left his wife and kids, lives with a washed up stripper in a house with a dedicated emotional support monkey zone, and now literally everyone in his professional circle is dragging him because the monkey bit a kid. 

harrison ford jones GIF

This dude left his wife and kids, lives with a washed up stripper in a house with a dedicated emotional support monkey zone, and now literally everyone in his professional circle is dragging him because the monkey bit a kid. 
200.gif

196e8424d004296160e95c3486edd449.jpg

I mean, PJ Fleck left his wife and kids for a stripper, but at least he made that stripper give her monkey away.

56 minutes ago, Surly Bevo said:


Could this be an “anti-rally” monkey? Asking for Sark.

Good thing Sark’s not in Collie Station

14 hours ago, Bama Chick said:

Absolutely dying.

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Cracking Up Lol GIF by HULU

I’ll see you mother fuckers in the bowels of Hell.

Not sure if anybody here listens to the Pat McAfee show on SiriusXM on MadDog radio but for a national show, he has been going on and on about Banks, Pole Assassin, her monkey, etc...  It's bad enough we suck but this is not great optics for UT at this point.  

12 minutes ago, Surly Bevo said:

I'm sure you'll be shocked

 


Awsome. That was fucking hilarious.

33 minutes ago, 956 Worldwide said:

This dude left his wife and kids, lives with a washed up stripper in a house with a dedicated emotional support monkey zone, and now literally everyone in his professional circle is dragging him because the monkey bit a kid. 

harrison ford jones GIF


the stripper hustle is real. 
 

don’t fall in love with hos 

40 minutes ago, tfoolry said:

Fuck around & find out. 
 

 

 

I’d shoot that fucking thing and then burn it if it did that to my dog.

Good thing that UT doesn’t care about it’s brand…

49 minutes ago, Francisco 2.0 said:

 

 

We're starting to round the corner with 9/11 jokes. Almost right on time with the 22.3 year rule.

19 minutes ago, Surly Bevo said:

I'm sure you'll be shocked

 

This is a distraction technique to get us away from the monkey. PR Genius. 

6 hours ago, 956 Worldwide said:

image.thumb.jpeg.92f854312e8ed426e1b317d9fb836d4d.jpeg

Something something, we’re now truly a Banana Republic

1 hour ago, Scheiss Meister said:

If the ISU band doesn't play something like Shock The Monkey or We're The Monkees during the game Saturday I will be severely disappointed.

ETA - Or The Beatles' Everybody's Got Something To Hide Except For Me And My Monkey.

This would be better bro.......

 

Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the monkey is bitin’
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the monkey is bitin’ 
Well I find it's quite a thrill
When it bites them against their will
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the kiddo is cryin'

17 minutes ago, Francisco 2.0 said:

 

 

Closers gonna close. 
 

Stop hating Hammm

  • Popular Post

 

Great.  I'm laughing so hard some of my fellow teachers think I'm crying.

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