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My B-I-L is extremely impatient. Nevermind that I am a central Texas kid who never sat in a combine until I was in my late 30s, if I don't hit the exact correct MPH and spacing from the combine, he'll rip me a new one. I wouldn't even mention watching football to him.
Hate that I'm not up there this week. I need to be home on Sunday and the 6-day window and night game screwed me. 

Sounds like a typical combine operator.
1 hour ago, USNALonghorn said:

Any cliffnotes for us non-BE peasants?

This was a direct quote “we are terrible, but we should win convincingly <mumbles > the first half <\mumbles>

1 hour ago, Al_4_ISU said:


Sounds like a typical combine operator.

Set your speed, drive straight, don’t look back, and keep your hand off the goddamn throttle. Adjusting things is my job. I can see in the grain cart- you can’t. 

Set your speed, drive straight, don’t look back, and keep your hand off the goddamn throttle. Adjusting things is my job. I can see in the grain cart- you can’t. 

Yeah, I do that.

Combine drops back suddenly? Oh you’re filling the back of the cart. I’ll stay set. Oh wait, you’re suddenly slowing down, didn’t communicate and started spilling grain everywhere? Cart’s fault.

Combine drops back suddenly on the next round? Shit, he’s gotta slow down again. Throttle back. Oh, wait. You’re just filling the back of the cart? Cart’s fault.

So the NFL Combine really is the National Foot Loose Combine competition? 

Very well, we select with our first pick---Kevin Bacon.  Apparently Chris Penn is not available.

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You’ll miss Midwest combine talk when the board gets flooded with people from Mississippi debating the finer points of noose tying.

Farmall 806.  Big 12 Grain Buggy (with those huge ass airplane tires).  Keeping up with 3 JD 95s in a section of milo.  Not a cab in sight.  Itchy as hell.  Had to time pickups for runs into the wind.  At night you found the combines going away from you by the orange glow of their mufflers.  It was always the buggy driver who kept speed with the combine.  Guess things have changed.

Farmall 806.  Big 12 Grain Buggy (with those huge ass airplane tires).  Keeping up with 3 JD 95s in a section of milo.  Not a cab in sight.  Itchy as hell.  Had to time pickups for runs into the wind.  At night you found the combines going away from you by the orange glow of their mufflers.  It was always the buggy driver who kept speed with the combine.  Guess things have changed.

The 06 series are some of my favorite tractors of all time. We picked rock with a gas 706 as a kid.
43 minutes ago, Kennythetiger said:

Set your speed, drive straight, don’t look back, and keep your hand off the goddamn throttle. Adjusting things is my job. I can see in the grain cart- you can’t. 

All true. 

33 minutes ago, Al_4_ISU said:

You’ll miss Midwest combine talk when the board gets flooded with people from Mississippi debating the finer points of noose tying.

Hey, I will. I will still be traveling to Iowa several times a year. Wish we would still be playing y'all.

53 minutes ago, Lobo said:

So the NFL Combine really is the National Foot Loose Combine competition? 

Very well, we select with our first pick---Kevin Bacon.  Apparently Chris Penn is not available.

There is a town about two hours away (which is nothing out here) that has a combine demolition derby each year during the county fair. 

1 hour ago, Kennythetiger said:

There is a town about two hours away (which is nothing out here) that has a combine demolition derby each year during the county fair. 

That sounds a lot more enjoyable than this football game 

So much apathy about this game that our Iowa friends have converted the football board into a farmers’ panel discussion on combine drivers just to keep up the web traffic.

Kenny’s from Kansas, but I’m not sure anyone knows the difference.

Since we all know UT is going to lose and I have a captive Iowan audience, is Cedar Rapids your favorite movie that takes place in Iowa or is there another one I should watch instead of this game on Saturday?

1 minute ago, Al_4_ISU said:

Kenny’s from Kansas, but I’m not sure anyone knows the difference.

Uh yeah, Kansas = BTK and basketball

Iowa = Corn and pretty damn good football

Since we all know UT is going to lose and I have a captive Iowan audience, is Cedar Rapids your favorite movie that takes place in Iowa or is there another one I should watch instead of this game on Saturday?

We’ve got like 3, between that Bridges of Madison County, and Field of Dreams.

I don’t really love any of them. FOD wins, I guess.
Uh yeah, Kansas = BTK and basketball
Iowa = Corn and pretty damn good football

Close enough

I'm looking to learn about picking produce.  Can someone direct me to that thread?

5 hours ago, USNALonghorn said:

Any cliffnotes for us non-BE peasants?

Our guys blow in practice too, the game comes around and we blow then also. It’s some crazy insight. Haha 

Been waiting for a corn thread to pop up. 

1 hour ago, Al_4_ISU said:

Kenny’s from Kansas, but I’m not sure anyone knows the difference.

Yeah the Combine Demolition Derbies in Iowa are strictly run-what-ya-brung.

55 minutes ago, Scholz said:

I'm looking to learn about picking produce.  Can someone direct me to that thread?

We don't play Fresno

I'm looking to learn about picking produce.  Can someone direct me to that thread?

You got two working hands?
5 hours ago, Tex Pete said:

Hey, I will. I will still be traveling to Iowa several times a year. Wish we would still be playing y'all.

TakemewithyousoicanhuntcoyotesPLEASE

3 hours ago, Scholz said:

I'm looking to learn about picking produce.  Can someone direct me to that thread?

You came to the right place. If you consider feed corn, seed corn, and soybeans to be produce. 

I don't see you guys  losing 4 in a row.

9 minutes ago, ISU Fan said:

I don't see you guys  losing 4 in a row.

That makes one of you. Most of us have resigned ourselves to the butt fucking that is about to take place.

4 minutes ago, Best served cold said:

That makes one of you. Most of us have resigned ourselves to the butt fucking that is about to take place.

I see it playing out like the West Virginia game last week 

1 hour ago, ISU Fan said:

I don't see you guys  losing 4 in a row.

I do

18 hours ago, GringoSalado said:

Yeah the Combine Demolition Derbies in Iowa are strictly run-what-ya-brung.

They don't play around.

 

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Normally, I'm falsely optimistic each week.  This week, I just keep seeing Breece Hall on one side and Brock on the other.  

1 hour ago, ISU Fan said:

I see it playing out like the West Virginia game last week 

nah.. Breece hall going to eat.  2nd half just run it at Texas is easy win.

16 minutes ago, TexMexBuddha said:

Where is the Friday thread? 

Sorry, bro. We are all corn all the time these days, and that is far less depressing.

Sorry, bro. We are all corn all the time these days, and that is far less depressing.
Holy shit. Not something I expected from you Tex. I am going to read the Dasani label backwards now..

I na saD
1 hour ago, ISU Fan said:

I don't see you guys  losing 4 in a row.

Well of course you don’t see it right now, because it’s only been 3 in a row. You’ll see it tomorrow though. 

I will be in San Antonio at my oldest baseball tournament. Luckily I can avoid watching this disaster of a football game live.

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