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Featured Replies

TexAgs is terrible, but I very briefly popped over to Tigerdroppings Poli board, and there were many of them actually complaining that the mods at TexAgs were TOO WOKE!

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  • Brisketexan
    Brisketexan

    No, Nicole.   That's not true.  Sure, every single human being has some innate bias etc. that colors their perspective, and different speakers PUSH different narratives.  But what is happening with th

  • hornmpa96
    hornmpa96

    That’s not true. As has been pointed out in this thread multiple times, other countries who had mass shooting events immediately changed their gun laws to make it harder or impossible to obtain the we

  • Chuckie Finster
    Chuckie Finster

    The "we can't solve 100% of the problem so we shouldn't make any attempt at all" line of thinking is a big reason why we are where we are. 

Posted Images

58 minutes ago, LonghornSean said:

TexAgs is terrible, but I very briefly popped over to Tigerdroppings Poli board, and there were many of them actually complaining that the mods at TexAgs were TOO WOKE!

Both of these sites reflect how hatred and ignorance can be affirmed and reinforced by creating safe places to practice your craft without progressive interference. The hilarious part is the way the pose questions to “liberals” knowing full well that all of them have been purged from those sites.

3 hours ago, royiv said:

That's some really fucked up shit that we need this type of education just so a vocal minority can have unrestricted access to their toys. 

But some people on this website are little pussies that need a gun to get some lunch. 

2 hours ago, LonghornSean said:

TexAgs is terrible, but I very briefly popped over to Tigerdroppings Poli board, and there were many of them actually complaining that the mods at TexAgs were TOO WOKE!

I've seen chin pussy Looch post things pro-D on there, and you'd have thought he was getting run off his board.  I dont follow their poli board, but there are screenshots floating.  And I'm talking down the center D, not progressive stuff.  They are still pissed about losing the Q thread too.  Or were.    I can't imagine tigerdroppings being worse than Txags. 

4 hours ago, Seasick Sailor said:

These have gotten harder since I became a father. I haven't told my wife about Allen, and I'm not sure she knows. We don't watch much TV these days and her social media exposure pretty much consists of Instagram shit about raising kids. She is already discussing moving to another country before our son starts school. I honestly don't know what to do. I'm a lawyer, so even moving to a different state is complicated. Another country is virtually impossible. Am I just supposed to send my wife and son out into the world and hope their number doesn't get called? 

Maybe I'm just exhausted, but It's time to take all the fucking guns. I'd rather have a dozen Wacos or Ruby Ridges as the feds round up the weapons than one more  Allen, Uvalde, Parkland, Sandy Hook, Aurora, etc. For the "I-need-my-gun-to-stand-against-tyranny" crowd, I say here's your chance motherfuckers good luck. I honestly don't give two shits if that means a lawful gunowner can't enjoy his or her hobby. Take up golf. 

The psychic weight of non stop gun violence has taken a toll on all of us. I started tripping at Market Street recently thinking how easy it would be for a shooter to walk in a pick me off at the self check out. It’s hard to feel liberated or truly free in this environment.

1 hour ago, 4th&Five said:

 

 

200w (13).gif

btw i read these words in person from old TJ today. it's like he thought we could evolve and adapt or something. wonder what he'd think of our Murder Dildo Cult today. 

20230509_125607.thumb.jpg.05b2a437a30c37d8399de9bc043d21ef.jpg

 

 

nah, this is cool...

jon-stewart-daily-show.gif.8d68988d616887ce4f3adcb1aa52b8d5.gif

5 hours ago, bluto said:

Bygod modern day MLK of gun reform, so bold. He’s gonna get primaried so fucking hard. 0D5966DA-49FB-45BC-A58B-75F177E352E7.thumb.png.0479fa80e9dfaa7421214a39f17c4a9c.png

Abbott already questioning if the bill is "constitutional."

6 hours ago, Seasick Sailor said:

 

Am I the only one who thought the black waitress was about to get arrested or shot???

1 hour ago, mchookem said:

btw i read these words in person from old TJ today. it's like he thought we could evolve and adapt or something. wonder what he'd think of our Murder Dildo Cult today. 

20230509_125607.thumb.jpg.05b2a437a30c37d8399de9bc043d21ef.jpg

 

 

nah, this is cool...

jon-stewart-daily-show.gif.8d68988d616887ce4f3adcb1aa52b8d5.gif

The preceding text from TJ was just as important and relevant today. 
 

Some men look at Constitutions with sanctimonious reverence, & deem them, like the ark of the covenant, too sacred to be touched. they ascribe to the men of the preceding age a wisdom more than human, and suppose what they did to be beyond amendment. I knew that age well: I belonged to it, and labored with it. it deserved well of it’s country. it was very like the present, but without the experience of the present: and 40. years of experience in government is worth a century of book-reading: and this they would say themselves, were they to rise from the dead.”

https://tjrs.monticello.org/letter/1384

Just now, speed817 said:

Tom Delonge Wtf GIF

image.thumb.png.7cc3bfeefacd8e558d48e8b168a53263.png

They need to bring back the Q thread to keep the nutjobs busy.

1 hour ago, mchookem said:

btw i read these words in person from old TJ today. it's like he thought we could evolve and adapt or something. wonder what he'd think of our Murder Dildo Cult today. 

20230509_125607.thumb.jpg.05b2a437a30c37d8399de9bc043d21ef.jpg

 

 

nah, this is cool...

jon-stewart-daily-show.gif.8d68988d616887ce4f3adcb1aa52b8d5.gif

I mean, this should really kill the originality argument about anything dead in its tracks, no?

 

  • Popular Post
6 hours ago, Seasick Sailor said:

These have gotten harder since I became a father. I haven't told my wife about Allen, and I'm not sure she knows. We don't watch much TV these days and her social media exposure pretty much consists of Instagram shit about raising kids. She is already discussing moving to another country before our son starts school. I honestly don't know what to do. I'm a lawyer, so even moving to a different state is complicated. Another country is virtually impossible. Am I just supposed to send my wife and son out into the world and hope their number doesn't get called? 

Maybe I'm just exhausted, but It's time to take all the fucking guns. I'd rather have a dozen Wacos or Ruby Ridges as the feds round up the weapons than one more  Allen, Uvalde, Parkland, Sandy Hook, Aurora, etc. For the "I-need-my-gun-to-stand-against-tyranny" crowd, I say here's your chance motherfuckers good luck. I honestly don't give two shits if that means a lawful gunowner can't enjoy his or her hobby. Take up golf. 

My wife and I moved from Texas back to my home state of Georgia in 2015 and then had our daughter a year and a half later, all with the plan to try and get closer with my family. We made the decision last year to move somewhere pretty far away. Most of the reasons are because of interpersonal issues like my wife made her aging mother move in with us at the start of COVID and was diagnosed with Alzheimer's with Lewy Body features and passing away last year (my wife was so close with her mother but refused to leave Fresno until she had fairly advanced dementia), as well as my parents really not doing much to help us out at all raising our daughter (she's almost six now and my wife and I haven't ever had a night alone together, one of us has always been with our daughter).

Georgia is doing 80-90% of the shit that Texas's and Florida's GOP controlled legislature are enacting but without the media fanfare. Even with our Presidential and Senate elections flipping the GOP still easily controls our state legislature because of intense gerrymandering. If this weren't happening I'd probably not be so keen to leave, but that's not the case and it only looks like White Christion Nationalism is going to keep being enshrined legally. So around summer of last year, after my wife's mother passed, we very strongly considered Canada (liked talked to two separate immigration consultants and took separate trips to Toronto and Hamilton to evaluate housing) as my company has a huge Canadian employee base mostly in Ontario. They were going to be able to sponsor us through CUSMA and my wife would get a work-permit after we moved.

Because of my wife's work permit being completely tied to me first and the fact that British Columbia and Ontario (you know, the provinces you'd probably move to) make anyone who isn't a permanent resident pay an extra 20% on a home purchase to combat foreign investors from snatching crap up, we decided to stay in the US but move to a much more progressive state, one where hopefully reproductive rights wouldn't be basically abolished and one where being gay or trans would basically become criminalized. We debated between Washington and Oregon and landed on Oregon after my wife's LCSW license was accepted there (WA wasn't going to be as easy). We're really going to miss our neighbors, the younger ones of which have kids closer to our daughter's age and are more progressive than the white boomers who mostly eat up Tucker Carlson's talking points. 

We'll be in the Portland area, in a pretty nice area, but I realize we're trading the culture war problems of the South with a lot of the homeless and petty crime that's plaguing much of the PNW, but I'd still much rather deal with that than living in a state where you can't get an abortion after six weeks, can't teach about the history of racism in schools, and have to deal with unhinged RWNJs who are allowed to conceal carry without a permit.

5 hours ago, Stilicho said:

Whatever you want to call the right (fascists, Christian Nationalists, white supremacists, etc.), it just as easy to refer to them as aggy.

The "struggle" some folks are having with this shooter being a non-white Nazi is the same struggle that they've realized, outside of sports, they share the aggy worldview. They are aggy.

It's pretty simple: if you vote Republican, you are aggy.

36 minutes ago, speed817 said:

Tom Delonge Wtf GIF

image.thumb.png.7cc3bfeefacd8e558d48e8b168a53263.png

Even if all that is dead on balls accurate.  I ask ya, do ya think the families of those other 7 dead people care who the son of a bitch who shot them was shooting at?

29 minutes ago, GSU&UT said:

My wife and I moved from Texas back to my home state of Georgia in 2015 and then had our daughter a year and a half later, all with the plan to try and get closer with my family. We made the decision last year to move somewhere pretty far away. Most of the reasons are because of interpersonal issues like my wife made her aging mother move in with us at the start of COVID and was diagnosed with Alzheimer's with Lewy Body features and passing away last year (my wife was so close with her mother but refused to leave Fresno until she had fairly advanced dementia), as well as my parents really not doing much to help us out at all raising our daughter (she's almost six now and my wife and I haven't ever had a night alone together, one of us has always been with our daughter).

Georgia is doing 80-90% of the shit that Texas's and Florida's GOP controlled legislature are enacting but without the media fanfare. Even with our Presidential and Senate elections flipping the GOP still easily controls our state legislature because of intense gerrymandering. If this weren't happening I'd probably not be so keen to leave, but that's not the case and it only looks like White Christion Nationalism is going to keep being enshrined legally. So around summer of last year, after my wife's mother passed, we very strongly considered Canada (liked talked to two separate immigration consultants and took separate trips to Toronto and Hamilton to evaluate housing) as my company has a huge Canadian employee base mostly in Ontario. They were going to be able to sponsor us through CUSMA and my wife would get a work-permit after we moved.

Because of my wife's work permit being completely tied to me first and the fact that British Columbia and Ontario (you know, the provinces you'd probably move to) make anyone who isn't a permanent resident pay an extra 20% on a home purchase to combat foreign investors from snatching crap up, we decided to stay in the US but move to a much more progressive state, one where hopefully reproductive rights wouldn't be basically abolished and one where being gay or trans would basically become criminalized. We debated between Washington and Oregon and landed on Oregon after my wife's LCSW license was accepted there (WA wasn't going to be as easy). We're really going to miss our neighbors, the younger ones of which have kids closer to our daughter's age and are more progressive than the white boomers who mostly eat up Tucker Carlson's talking points. 

We'll be in the Portland area, in a pretty nice area, but I realize we're trading the culture war problems of the South with a lot of the homeless and petty crime that's plaguing much of the PNW, but I'd still much rather deal with that than living in a state where you can't get an abortion after six weeks, can't teach about the history of racism in schools, and have to deal with unhinged RWNJs who are allowed to conceal carry without a permit.

Godspeed. I'd like to do the same at some point but we're kind of tied in to Dallas due to my wife's relationship with her in-laws as they move into their late 70's. I've got one kid about to be a senior in HS and another who is a freshman. Once they're both out of HS, it makes it easier for us to consider leaving too.

11 minutes ago, C-Man said:

Godspeed. I'd like to do the same at some point but we're kind of tied in to Dallas due to my wife's relationship with her in-laws as they move into their late 70's. I've got one kid about to be a senior in HS and another who is a freshman. Once they're both out of HS, it makes it easier for us to consider leaving too.

I understand, if our daughter was several years older it would probably be a lot more difficult. Thankfully she is still fairly young and extremely extroverted compared to me and my wife and can adapt to a big change easier right now.

My mother is in bad shape physically but not quite on death's door. My dad is her caregiver, but he's so incredibly stubborn that he's refusing to make the big changes now that will make their lives easier when she really becomes debilitated over the next few years, like outright refusing to have us pay for a geriatric care manager. I just went through some very rough shit with my MIL and my BIL suddenly fighting every decision my wife was making despite never coming to really see her. I feel guilty about moving almost 3000 miles away but I just don't have the patience and energy with a young kid right now to push my dad to get them out of their house. I was more or less a single dad for my daughter for most of 2020-2022 while my wife cared for her mother then battled severe depression after her death, I'm emotionally tapped out for a while.

Sorry for the look-at-me venting, but it's been a shitty two and a half years and my wife and I are basically ready to start a new and hopefully different chapter in our lives.

 

Edited by GSU&UT

5 hours ago, GSU&UT said:

I understand, if our daughter was several years older it would probably be a lot more difficult. Thankfully she is still fairly young and extremely extroverted compared to me and my wife and can adapt to a big change easier right now.

My mother is in bad shape physically but not quite on death's door. My dad is her caregiver, but he's so incredibly stubborn that he's refusing to make the big changes now that will make their lives easier when she really becomes debilitated over the next few years, like outright refusing to have us pay for a geriatric care manager. I just went through some very rough shit with my MIL and my BIL suddenly fighting every decision my wife was making despite never coming to really see her. I feel guilty about moving almost 3000 miles away but I just don't have the patience and energy with a young kid right now to push my dad to get them out of their house. I was more or less a single dad for my daughter for most of 2020-2022 while my wife cared for her mother then battled severe depression after her death, I'm emotionally tapped out for a while.

Sorry for the look-at-me venting, but it's been a shitty two and a half years and my wife and I are basically ready to start a new and hopefully different chapter in our lives.

 

Take care of yourself. Do what’s best for you now.

7 hours ago, speed817 said:

Tom Delonge Wtf GIF

image.thumb.png.7cc3bfeefacd8e558d48e8b168a53263.png

“It was a gang hit gone bad.”

”What do you want to do to keep guns away from them?”

”Well, nothing.”

4 hours ago, Aqua Buddha said:

“It was a gang hit gone bad.”

”What do you want to do to keep guns away from them?”

”Well, nothing.”


America:

You can’t stop someone who’s intent on breaking the law. 
If you pass stricter gun laws they’d break those too.

And plus there’s already so many guns out there that any law would only hurt law abiding people and THEN we’d be sitting ducks.

At least now you can defend yourself.

Can you imagine how many more people this guy would have killed if he didn’t have to worry about the possibility of one other person having a gun too?

This Allen shooting is close to where I live and while I haven’t gone there in years it’s somewhere my wife and used to go to wander around at an outdoor mall.  So where were all the “good guns” when this happened.  I mean all these good guys have their second amendment rights and own dozens of guns each.  They have to have the right to open carry so they can protect themselves yet they never seem to be where these mass shooters are like Allen or that Walmart in El Paso.  Texas should pass a law that any person that is at the scene of one of these horrific mass shootings and had a gun but did nothing should get 10 years in prison no questions asked.  Yeah I know the logical solution is to take these type of guns away from everyone but since the 2nd amendment crowd won’t let that happen then they should start being on the hook for these shootings also.  When they occurs the police should detain every person at the location, search them for a gun and if they have one throw them in prison for not doing their 2nd amendment duty of defending innocent people. 

6 minutes ago, Beantown Express 2.0 said:

This Allen shooting is close to where I live and while I haven’t gone there in years it’s somewhere my wife and used to go to wander around at an outdoor mall.  So where were all the “good guns” when this happened.  I mean all these good guys have their second amendment rights and own dozens of guns each.  They have to have the right to open carry so they can protect themselves yet they never seem to be where these mass shooters are like Allen or that Walmart in El Paso.  Texas should pass a law that any person that is at the scene of one of these horrific mass shootings and had a gun but did nothing should get 10 years in prison no questions asked.  Yeah I know the logical solution is to take these type of guns away from everyone but since the 2nd amendment crowd won’t let that happen then they should start being on the hook for these shootings also.  When they occurs the police should detain every person at the location, search them for a gun and if they have one throw them in prison for not doing their 2nd amendment duty of defending innocent people. 

Unless you’re walking around in body armor with an assault weapon yourself, you and your concealed handgun are probably better off running for your life and only drawing your weapon as a last resort if you get cornered. 

12 minutes ago, WhatTheBuck said:

Unless you’re walking around in body armor with an assault weapon yourself, you and your concealed handgun are probably better off running for your life and only drawing your weapon as a last resort if you get cornered. 

I totally understand that but that’s the price you pay for getting to have your toys on you.  I know the real answer is to ban these type of weapons along with some other changes in gun laws like back ground check and gun sale rules along with mental health issues.  It probably won’t stop every single last mass shooting but if you enact those things and it doesn’t cut the mass shootings way down I would be shocked.  

Also, fuck the second amendment folks out there that hide behind that amendment and let this shit happen over and over again.  Every day my son goes to high school I am terrified of a mass shooting happening at his school and him being a victim.  We as a people shouldn’t have to live like this.  All my parents had to worry about when I was in high school was me ditching class and going to the beach to smoke weed and get a tan.  I wish I had the same worries about my son.

Don’t despair. Marsha Blackburn has a solution that will not disappoint. She wants to put armed grandmas and grandpas in the schools to stand guard. Problem solved. 

Stop voting for Republicans. 

On 5/10/2023 at 7:31 AM, Beantown Express 2.0 said:

Every day my son goes to high school I am terrified of a mass shooting happening at his school and him being a victim.  We as a people shouldn’t have to live like this.  All my parents had to worry about when I was in high school was me ditching class and going to the beach to smoke weed and get a tan.  I wish I had the same worries about my son.

This can't be overemphasized. Every single day I think about Uvalde when I send my kid to school. I thought about it yesterday. I thought about it today. I'll think about it tomorrow. And there's an entire generation that's living in that shit.

I'm volunteering at field day today and I'm legit thinking about what would I do if I'm in the open field with these kids and there's a shooter. That's so amazingly fucked up. 

^

Had the same experience setting up for Field Day two weeks ago.  Our elementary campus is heavily wooded on two sides where we set up some obstacle course stuff.  And as such we had an active lockdown when a shady fucker was seen in the treeline awhile back.  And they have active shooter drills every 9 weeks, plus a bus shooter drill.  Plus I just found out about the hidden handguns at our church/preschool.  And my daughter took some friends to the mall for her birthday a couple weeks ago before Allen and didn't occur to me, but from now on I have to put her through a "find your nearest exit/hiding place" drill next time. 
 

And 51% of this state thinks that is just fine to put small children through so that you and I can hunt.  And their biggest threat to their sanity is a single library book.   

But to even question any of this obviously means I am categorically coming for all your guns and erasing the 2nd Amendment.  Fucking children...

Don't want to impede anyone from bagging their limit of school children, shoppers, or anybody not in a fortified position.

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We learn something new everyday:

https://www.yahoo.com/news/curious-case-mexican-white-supremacist-092406984.html

The confirmation of [Mauricio] Garcia's extreme political beliefs also opened up another question about whether far-Right ideology could be on the rise among Hispanics in America.

In 2017 the Daily Stormer, the leading neo-Nazi website, launched a Spanish-language edition called "El Daily Stormer" and said it had a "big Spanish-speaking population" on its forums.

According to Tanya Hernandez, author of Racial Innocence: Unmasking Latino Anti-Black Bias it is the case that "in Latin America, white supremacy is alive and well."

Brian Levin, director of the Center for the Study of Hate and Extremism at Cal State University, told Axios there was a "mutation that takes place as the [Hispanic] racist fringe tries to become more mainstream".

Juliette Kayyem, a former assistant secretary at the Department of Homeland Security, said: “This is a very complicated aspect of Right-wing extremism.

"We would assume that everyone is white in a Caucasian sense. But Hispanic is an ethnicity, not a race, and so a lot of Hispanics identify as being white."

  • Popular Post
17 minutes ago, FirstTimeCaller said:

Texas State student shot through the wall of his apartment by a neighbor playing with his gun. Shooter gets 90 days.

https://www.fox7austin.com/news/texas-state-student-shot-killed-through-wall-while-sleeping

Fucking Texas.  Get caught with too much weed while being brown?  Probably 6 months in the clink.  Shoot and kill someone while modifying a loaded gun?  90 days.  

Fuck this bullshit.  You want to play with big boy toys?  Deal with big boy consequences when you fuck up doing something stupid.

2 hours ago, FirstTimeCaller said:

Texas State student shot through the wall of his apartment by a neighbor playing with his gun. Shooter gets 90 days.

https://www.fox7austin.com/news/texas-state-student-shot-killed-through-wall-while-sleeping

Even worse, fuckhead only has to serve 9 days, twice per year, for five years. He gets to live a normal life except for nine days every six months. Human life is cheap these days. 

1 minute ago, royiv said:

Even worse, fuckhead only has to serve 9 days, twice per year, for five years. He gets to live a normal life except for nine days every six months. Human life is cheap these days. 

"Well, you see, his gun gets depressed when he's not around for more than 10 days, so he can't be expected to be in prison for more than 9 days at a time ..."

1525699570081-1525699586168-https_%252F%

 

2 hours ago, royiv said:

Even worse, fuckhead only has to serve 9 days, twice per year, for five years. He gets to live a normal life except for nine days every six months. Human life is cheap these days. 

In Texas, guns are more valued than people.

Stop voting for Republicans.

So the bill that proposed to raise the age to buy semi-automatic weapons in Texas, that made it out of committee, didn’t make it onto the calendar to be voted on by the entire chamber. I am Jack’s complete lack of surprise.

Just now, C-Man said:

So the bill that proposed to raise the age to buy semi-automatic weapons in Texas, that made it out of committee, didn’t make it onto the calendar to be voted on by the entire chamber. I am Jack’s complete lack of surprise.

There are people on that committee that needed to tell their constituents that they did something about guns.  A meaninglessness committee vote will be enough.

At the very least we should know who asked for the point of order to stop advancement of the bill.

  • Popular Post

If only there was a good guy with a gun… or more guns… I forget what the right answer is when it’s shit like this.

31 minutes ago, TexEx15 said:

If only there was a good guy with a gun… or more guns… I forget what the right answer is when it’s shit like this.

Screenshot_20230512_002637_Chrome.thumb.jpg.0af5b2e0173092d1000ffc5f70e333c4.jpg

There are times the psychos complain gun laws aren’t enforced strictly enough, then there are most times.

15 hours ago, Satchel said:

In 2017 the Daily Stormer, the leading neo-Nazi website, launched a Spanish-language edition called "El Daily Stormer" and said it had a "big Spanish-speaking population" on its forums.

El Nino Snl GIFs | Tenor

On 5/8/2023 at 8:03 PM, BevoAbyss said:

There is rarely a single explanation for complex phenomena (one of the lessons of chaos/complexity theory). 

But Is one of the "smoking guns "literally right before our eyes? In our hands?

Since around 2005, the proliferation of smart phones and social media parallels the proliferation of guns and assault weapons. Of course, correlation is not causation. But, it is an interesting pattern. 2004 also marks the end of the assault weapon ban, just as Facebook and social media were taking off. A perfect storm?

It is obvious that social media massively ramps up pre-existing hate, anger, sexism, racism, prejudice, bigotry, idiocy, fanaticism, paranoia, tribalism, religious fervor, nationalism, etc. And social media are where many people look to find an identity with a tribe, and someone to blame for their problems. And with the phones, tablets, and laptops, it's all right in our faces, coming right at us, tribe v. tribe, etc. 24/7/365. 

Perhaps the medium is the message, in more ways than one? 

Chart1.jpg

Chart2.jpg

chart3.jpg

The relaxing of the few pussy ass gun laws we did have has way more to do with it than social media.  If social media was the big contributor you would see this shit all over the world, but we dominate the world rankings in mass shootings.  It's the guns.  Full stop.

Edited by Fudge Nuggets

25 minutes ago, HenryJames said:

El Nino Snl GIFs | Tenor

I'm surprised they didn't go with "El Dailyo Stormero".

9 hours ago, TexEx15 said:

If only there was a good guy with a gun… or more guns… I forget what the right answer is when it’s shit like this.

Errrr... umm... DEMOCRAT CITIES! /TexasRepublicans

Man, The Onion is just money...

Texas School Picture Day Photographer Expands Offerings To Include Memorial Posters

Image for article titled Texas School Picture Day Photographer Expands Offerings To Include Memorial Posters

SAN ANTONIO—After noticing a sharp increase in demand in recent months, local school picture day photographer Allison Cummings announced Friday that she would expand her offerings to include large memorial posters. “We’re pleased to let our many Texas clients know they can now order a 26-by-34 memorial poster board of their child’s face that would perfectly represent them at a wake or vigil,” said Cummings, recommending parents, grandparents, and other surviving family members act now to purchase the large-format version of what might be the last photograph of their child ever captured.

“Take it from other mourning parents: You won’t want to be concerned with this kind of thing if the unthinkable occurs a few days, weeks, or months from now. This is the sort of high-quality inkjet print and sturdy cardboard your child deserves to have hanging above their casket. It’s only $39.99, and we’re offering 15% off and our condolences to anyone with more than one child in the same Texas school.”

At press time, Cummings was overheard instructing one smiling child to “do a serious one” in case he turned out to be the next shooter.

1 hour ago, FirstTimeCaller said:

Man, The Onion is just money...

Texas School Picture Day Photographer Expands Offerings To Include Memorial Posters

Image for article titled Texas School Picture Day Photographer Expands Offerings To Include Memorial Posters

SAN ANTONIO—After noticing a sharp increase in demand in recent months, local school picture day photographer Allison Cummings announced Friday that she would expand her offerings to include large memorial posters. “We’re pleased to let our many Texas clients know they can now order a 26-by-34 memorial poster board of their child’s face that would perfectly represent them at a wake or vigil,” said Cummings, recommending parents, grandparents, and other surviving family members act now to purchase the large-format version of what might be the last photograph of their child ever captured.

“Take it from other mourning parents: You won’t want to be concerned with this kind of thing if the unthinkable occurs a few days, weeks, or months from now. This is the sort of high-quality inkjet print and sturdy cardboard your child deserves to have hanging above their casket. It’s only $39.99, and we’re offering 15% off and our condolences to anyone with more than one child in the same Texas school.”

At press time, Cummings was overheard instructing one smiling child to “do a serious one” in case he turned out to be the next shooter.

Need a new "laughing / crying / angry" posrep for these sorts of posts because I always feel shitty for clicking the laughing or hook'em ones ...

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