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#68851
8 minutes ago, Frank Drebin said:

Make it happen.  You can afford a charter.  Tell his ass to get to the nearest FBO and be ready to party.  Send a couple whores too.  

I would pay his crazy ass, won't scramble the jet but god damn pics of him on the boat with dimes, and that face.   Priceless.  Also his mom needs a fuck.  Got damn.  

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#68854
5 hours ago, jimmyjazz said:

Gotta love the interior "decor".  Pure white trash.  Little kids' faces blurred because I'm not an animal.

Note the Michael's/Hobby Lobby scrabble installation on the wall, presumably of all the kids' names, including "Tyller" and "Blayne".  How Houston suburb of them.

image.png.a7b61457f62def143c801a36f905ba45.png

Birth Control pills already: "be prepared!"

#68856
9 hours ago, Hank Kingsley said:

giphy.gif?cid=ecf05e47h3kppo9c5xty6f375m

Elko with his adipose tsunami,  likely has candidal intertigo... in other words he is a BK menu item: ..."a Whopper, with cheese"

#68859
1 hour ago, Wishbone said:

What does a meat judge look for when choosing a wife? 🤔

He's looked for evidence of her roast beef, and then finding her guilty of wanting to get dicked. 

#68860
5 hours ago, Brisketexan said:

Teddy Grahams

I feel like these are a very bipolar snack.  I usually avoid them because just a few are not good, then if I get a handful, I may end up crushing the whole box in about 15 minutes. 

 

#68861
1 hour ago, ChiTownDoc said:

Not gonna lie, I wanna fly this legend into Miami for this weekend's shenanigans.  So many bitches.  Need meat pimp to help entertain em.  

Fuck yes you do! 

#68862

The past few pages of meat pimp talk have brought me great joy. Thank you,  assholes. 

  • Popular Post
#68864
23 hours ago, TreatyOak said:

And please, DO NOT ASK ME TO CREATE a Mike Elko as Baron Harkonnen!!! I'M NOT DOING IT!!!

Baron-Harkonnen-Dune-Elko.jpg

Now, are you happy, @Neonmoon?

Thanks to you, I've missed my Fleshlight sales quota for 4th quarter. Not only do I have to explain it on call with the regional sales director, (who's a 33 year old bastard who likes to age-shame me), I've still got to somehow move 55 units. Does anyone want to buy one? They make great gifts for your family and neighbors.

#68867
50 minutes ago, Pimphand said:

Meh it has really gone downhill since Chicago bought the franchise. Back in 1993 you could get the #1 Whatameal for $4.09 after tax. Now that shit is $9.73. PTerry's has taken over Whataburger's role in this town....

Damn, that looks good! Wish they'd open a few stores in DFW.

https://pterrys.com/about-us/our-story

Edited by DFW Horn

#68868

P terry's is an icon for me. From UT to being a  Little League Coach down on Town Lake.

And they are all over the place. Saw them about every 50 miles driving up to Sherman.

Edited by InkaUtexas

  • Popular Post
#68869

Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have meatness thrust upon them.

#68873
41 minutes ago, El Squared said:

Answer: is it pink inside?

 

Black or White, I love to ride

Hey, liley liley liley

'Cause all that meat is pink inside

Hey, liley liley lo...

 

#68874
1 hour ago, Pimphand said:

Meh it has really gone downhill since Chicago bought the franchise. Back in 1993 you could get the #1 Whatameal for $4.09 after tax. Now that shit is $9.73. PTerry's has taken over Whataburger's role in this town....

It started losing it years ago.  But then I was lucky to eat at some of the original ones in Corpus, back when they wrote your order on the bag.   In Austin my go to is Hill-bert's out on Cameron Rd.    I stopped for an OT Special the other day, and was pretty disappointed.  

  • Popular Post
#68876
21 minutes ago, Hank Kingsley said:

Feel the Meat: The Life and Times of Meat Pimp, the Kobe of Texas A&M

- a SurlyHorns documentary 

It all started with a photo, a trophy and a smirk.

That's all it took and the next thing he knew he and his milf mother were on a flight to Miami. 

He was confused why he was told to leave his serviceable girlfriend behind and bring his mom instead, but he was a trophy winner, a champion and knew he was destined to be a legend.

So off he went, mom in tow, and when he stepped on the boat in Miami, he knew, all bets were off and the world had changed.

Meat pimp had gone mainstream and nothing would ever be the same, particularly his mom. He didn't care, he looked around, took in the talent and popped on his hat and smirk. Time to get busy meat pimpin' or get busy dying.

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#68877
1 hour ago, TreatyOak said:

Now, are you happy, @Neonmoon?

Thanks to you, I've missed my Fleshlight sales quota for 4th quarter. Not only do I have to explain it on call with the regional sales director, (who's a 33 year old bastard who likes to age-shame me), I've still got to somehow move 55 units. Does anyone want to buy one? They make great gifts for your family and neighbors.

Its crunch time. You need to somehow get ahold of the Glengarry Clemgarry leads. You can move some product to those fucknuts

image.png.e9b3502901f502ee7116eaaa685322b5.png

#68878
6 hours ago, jimmyjazz said:

Gotta love the interior "decor".  Pure white trash.  Little kids' faces blurred because I'm not an animal.

Note the Michael's/Hobby Lobby scrabble installation on the wall, presumably of all the kids' names, including "Tyller" and "Blayne".  How Houston suburb of them.

image.png.a7b61457f62def143c801a36f905ba45.png

And guests would politely ask, "Why?  Why are the animals always looking to their right just before their demise, they'd inquire?"  

Because a Meat Coital Aggie always approaches from the Left.  

#68879
2 hours ago, Pimphand said:

Meh it has really gone downhill since Chicago bought the franchise. Back in 1993 you could get the #1 Whatameal for $4.09 after tax. Now that shit is $9.73. PTerry's has taken over Whataburger's role in this town....

P. Terry's is dogshit.

And shocking that something is twice is expensive as it was 30 years ago. Must be corporate's fault.

Edited by Deej

#68880
31 minutes ago, Blotto said:

Its crunch time. You need to somehow get ahold of the Glengarry Clemgarry leads. You can move some product to those fucknuts

image.png.e9b3502901f502ee7116eaaa685322b5.png

Subtle brilliance. 

#68881
2 hours ago, TreatyOak said:

Baron-Harkonnen-Dune-Elko.jpg

Now, are you happy, @Neonmoon?

Thanks to you, I've missed my Fleshlight sales quota for 4th quarter. Not only do I have to explain it on call with the regional sales director, (who's a 33 year old bastard who likes to age-shame me), I've still got to somehow move 55 units. Does anyone want to buy one? They make great gifts for your family and neighbors.

Derka wants 12

#68882

Shoot. We missed a huge troll moment in the Texas Bowl game. When it was clear OSU was going to win, we should have pre-pledged a huge donation to the OSU athletic department if the crowd had chanted "BDF, BDF, BDF." 

#68883
5 hours ago, Pods said:

The man knows his meat. 

I have one of those KitchenAid grinders and it is awesome. I almost never buy store ground beef anymore.

The quality of fresh ground is far superior and I can do a coarser grind, which everyone in my house prefers.

I can also grind some meat, then sprinkle seasonings on, then repeat in layers to season the meat without compacting it by mixing afterwards. 

Catch a chuck, or round roast, on sale and chuck them in the freezer and it's pretty economical as well. 

If you've already got a KitchenAid mixer, get that grinder attachment. You won't regret it. 

I read this in Dwight Schrute's voice.

#68884
2 hours ago, Hank Kingsley said:

He's looked for evidence of her roast beef, and then finding her guilty of wanting to get dicked. 

PS. Your cunt is in the sink.

#68886
37 minutes ago, SHOOTER12 said:

Derka wants 12

12 Fleshlights or 12 XXXL pullovers?

#68888
3 hours ago, BurntEyes said:

We really make an effort to get the meat pimp on Surly. Judging by his moms jugs and his smirk, his smug ass would fit right in. Hell, he probably bag on Ags in this thread.

He's our kind of hero.

He and Gap Kid should have a baby

#68890
2 hours ago, Deej said:

P. Terry's is dogshit.

And shocking that something is twice is expensive as it was 30 years ago. Must be corporate's fault.

Fuck that. Wife brought me a classic with bacon and good to go. I don't need .5 pounds of gimmicky shit. Whataburger used to be solid. A classic. Nice. All this new shit? Slows down the line and your food is cold when you get it.

And I eat fast food maybe 3 times a year.

#68891

Mizzou with their 4th 11 win season of this century have now tied all time with Texas A&M who also has 4 11 win seasons. #whoop

#68892

Them adding new shit has nothing to do with the price doubling in 30 years or the fact that P. Terry's is garbage.

#68893
1 minute ago, Deej said:

Them adding new shit has nothing to do with the price doubling in 30 years or the fact that P. Terry's is garbage.

We get it you want to overpay for trash its a free country go knock yourself out and wait in line.

#68894
4 minutes ago, Pimphand said:

We get it you want to overpay for trash its a free country go knock yourself out and wait in line.

And eat your cold ass Texas Toast. And you will like it dammit..... 

 

#68895
2 minutes ago, Pimphand said:

We get it you want to overpay for trash its a free country go knock yourself out and wait in line.

Si yiu just haven't seen orices on anything the past few year?

Oh, and a PTerry's doubke combo (you have to get a double if you want something that doesn't resemble a kids burger) after tax is 9 bucks something.

Go eat your trashy P burger.

#68897
3 minutes ago, Deej said:

Si yiu just haven't seen orices on anything the past few year?

Oh, and a PTerry's doubke combo (you have to get a double if you want something that doesn't resemble a kids burger) after tax is 9 bucks something.

Go eat your trashy P burger.

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