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On 3/14/2019 at 1:52 PM, 1978horn said:

I believe a guy on TOS had this issue.  Chick he was sleeping with told him he got her pregnant.  He showed her the paperwork that showed him sterile and then she confessed that she picked him out of a group of guys that she was seeing because he seemed the most stable....which is saying a lot with anyone associated with that site or this one!

If any of you are doubting the value of this post, look in to www.fakeababy.com and you will realize how deceitful some women can be. Sonograms can be manufactured for a price.

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Took my two-month fertility test last night and I'm happy to report that I'm infertile!

On 3/14/2019 at 12:39 PM, High Plains Drifter said:

I'd pay 55 bucks just to get my nuts shaved.

nm

Edited by Gil Bang

5 hours ago, irishtexan said:

Took my two-month fertility test last night and I'm happy to report that I'm infertile!

And the world thanks you. 😋

So I had mine in 1980.  The needle to the nuts wasn't horrific, but I asked if I should feel the needle all the way up to my throat.  The doctor thought that was funny.  I wasn't thinking that at the time.  However, after the initial numbing was over, I never experienced any kind of pain, at any point.  I only had bruising in my balls, but zero pain.

Someone asked about testosterone levels.  The acceptable range is between 264 and 916.  Last year (in March 2018) mine was at 363 which is at the lower end, but still acceptable.  I'm not a doctor so I don't know what those numbers really mean.  About 2 weeks ago, my level was 359, so a slight drop.  I'm a runner (a slow-ass runner), but I'm pushing 70 and I can do 10 miles, but it takes about 2 1/2 hours.  So I think the running helps with the testosterone levels. Still, I would do it all over again.

I think lower testosterone levels at 70 are more due to Mother Nature telling you to stop doing stupid shit and don’t have any more fucking kids you may not be around to keep in line.

I did Shaw last Fall and the pain/tugging/secondary numbing shot was significantly worse than described in this thread.  That said, the physical recovery wasn’t bad and I was back up to 5 miles/day in about a week.  The rest of the process didn’t feel right for a couple of weeks, but everything was back to normal by a month.

11 hours ago, irishtexan said:

Took my two-month fertility test last night and I'm happy to report that I'm infertile!

Mazel Tov!

When I had my hernia surgery my balls were purple for 3 weeks. Any reason to believe that’s going to happen again? I’m trying to do this a little under the radar because I’m pretty sure some of these women wouldn’t like me if the prospect of kids was off the table.  

4 minutes ago, Jhawk said:

When I had my hernia surgery my balls were purple for 3 weeks. Any reason to believe that’s going to happen again? I’m trying to do this a little under the radar because I’m pretty sure some of these women wouldn’t like me if the prospect of kids was off the table.  

my balls were bruised for about a week after. You also have to factor in the incision stitch/scar. Stitch falls out after a couple of weeks and it took about a month for it to fully heal. If you're getting ball attention, you will have to explain how you have a scab on your nuts. 

1 hour ago, irishtexan said:

my balls were bruised for about a week after. You also have to factor in the incision stitch/scar. Stitch falls out after a couple of weeks and it took about a month for it to fully heal. If you're getting ball attention, you will have to explain how you have a scab on your nuts. 

I'll just pick at it until its gone in a few days.  Also... my balls are really small anyway.  Hard to have a small scab with microballsack.

On 3/19/2019 at 10:42 AM, Jhawk said:

I'll just pick at it until its gone in a few days.  Also... my balls are really small anyway.  Hard to have a small scab with microballsack.

You lucky bastard. I’m about two more years away from having to lower the water level in my toilets.

 

On 3/19/2019 at 7:07 AM, irishtexan said:

my balls were bruised for about a week after. You also have to factor in the incision stitch/scar. Stitch falls out after a couple of weeks and it took about a month for it to fully heal. If you're getting ball attention, you will have to explain how you have a scab on your nuts. 

I had no stitches.  Just a small hole that healed fairly quickly. 

  • 1 month later...

My 90 window was up so I took my sample back earlier this week.  Still have swimmers.  Good god, I probably have more bastard children than Robert Baratheon.

  • Author

Going in this morning for the pre-consult at Dr. Trotter.  Downing coffee to try and be able to pee while I'm there since I couldn't hold it this morning when I woke up.

24 minutes ago, Biff Tannen said:

Going in this morning for the pre-consult at Dr. Trotter.  Downing coffee to try and be able to pee while I'm there since I couldn't hold it this morning when I woke up.

Skipped that part, just went in once and got it done. No reason to prolong the process. 

  • Author
8 minutes ago, hornbri said:

Skipped that part, just went in once and got it done. No reason to prolong the process. 

Don’t think I had a choice in the matter. 

1 hour ago, Dean Gullberry said:

My 90 window was up so I took my sample back earlier this week.  Still have swimmers.  Good god, I probably have more bastard children than Robert Baratheon.

 

Edited by Nueces River Rat

55 minutes ago, hornbri said:

Skipped that part, just went in once and got it done. No reason to prolong the process. 

Sames. 

yeah, no reason for another co-pay.  i think i saw shaw for a grand total of 6 minutes through the whole thing.

  • Author

Didn't need a urine sample since I'm under 55 he said.  So downed a bunch of coffee for no reason.  Got scheduled for June though, in between vacations.

  • 2 months later...
  • Author

Ok, finally going in on Friday morning.  This is weird.  I'm not worried about the procedure really.  Just weird.

40 minutes ago, Biff Tannen said:

Ok, finally going in on Friday morning.  This is weird.  I'm not worried about the procedure really.  Just weird.

You are not suppose to take the xanax until the day of.

Seriously, there is nothing to worry about. Unless you have a micro ball sack.

Don't forget to take the xanax though. 

Dude, you need to man up and tell her to get her tubes tied. This isn't Nam.

9 minutes ago, High Plains Drifter said:

Gotta get this done asap. Somebody post some recs for surgeons  in Austin.

Someone's gotta ask.  ASAP?

I mean, getting your twins worked on ASAP?  There's gotta be a story here.

 

1 minute ago, Francisco 2.0 said:

Someone's gotta ask.  ASAP?

I mean, getting your twins worked on ASAP?  There's gotta be a story here.

 

Agreed.  Spill it.

  • Author

Welp.  Done.  On the couch with a bag o peas.  Feels like I have blue balls.  Procedure wasn't bad.  Not super fun right now though.

Did my post test the other week and I'm sterile. Used Shaw as well and it was pretty easy. A little more than some people describe it IMO. Kind of like getting a staple gun in the nuts but mostly just uncomfortable versus lots of pain. It did seem that I had a lingering pain in my balls for at least a month... like the after affect of getting racked.

Staple gun in the balls sounds awful.

More like a finger thump to the balls.  If you are in to that sort of thing. 

20 minutes ago, swraith said:

Staple gun in the balls sounds awful.

I have my consult in a couple of weeks, thanks for the visual. 

  • Author
1 hour ago, ZB'Tejas said:

Did my post test the other week and I'm sterile. Used Shaw as well and it was pretty easy. A little more than some people describe it IMO. Kind of like getting a staple gun in the nuts but mostly just uncomfortable versus lots of pain. It did seem that I had a lingering pain in my balls for at least a month... like the after affect of getting racked.

Pretty much this.  Feels like blue balls.  Popped a hydrocodone and thats doing the trick though.

I don’t know about a staple gun, but I would say a decent sized rubber band for the numbing shots.  Shaw definitely got a “Fuck Doc” yelled at him during the second shot.  The tugging and smell also get a bit downplayed here as well.

Things didn’t seem right for a couple of weeks afterward and I was starting to have doubts on the decision.  Around the month mark or so, everything went back to normal.

There are no regrets on my part now, but just don’t want anyone to go in blind.

58 minutes ago, Kringelbert Fishtybuns said:

There are no regrets on my part now, but just don’t want anyone to go in blind.

 

Prior most people said "its no big deal" "super easy" which is comparison to other things yes however it's not a walk in the park and the lingering affect like you was something that made me wonder if something was wrong. That's all gone now so smooth sailing from here on out hopefully.

I don't think I got any post pain meds other than something for the day of. The Xanax prior was funny as my wife gave me a lot of shit for that saying you should try having two kids. 

On 7/10/2019 at 10:45 PM, High Plains Drifter said:

Just have some time off work, kid will be at camp in a few weeks, its a good time to get er done.

You should wait until football season starts so you can have a hassle free weekend on the couch with something to watch on TV.  

That, March Madness and Masters are the best weekend for getting your nut sack cut in to.  

8 hours ago, hullabelew said:

You should wait until football season starts so you can have a hassle free weekend on the couch with something to watch on TV.  

That, March Madness and Masters are the best weekend for getting your nut sack cut in to.  

The Open is next week

I went with Masters weekend... only downside is that I ended up missing the opportunity to take kids to Orange and White game.


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Had it done last week. A little more pain than I had anticipated. Doc told me not to laugh or yell during the procedure as it makes the boys rise. When they stuck that needle in, I laughed to compensate for the fucking pain. Also, when they burned the tube shut, I felt like someone connected a car battery to my balls. Recovery wasn't too bad. Felt like I had been flicked on my sack. Nothing a bag of frozen peas wouldn't help.

On 7/12/2019 at 10:55 AM, Native Horn said:

Pinky thump or bird-finger thump?

Bird finger thump. Kawhi Leonard's bird finger.

You guys getting a needle are doing it wrong. No needle, no scalpel guy on I10 in Houston is the way to go. Zero pain. It was quick.

The puff of smoke coming up from your balls was disconcerting. 

Did my post test the other week and I'm sterile. Used Shaw as well and it was pretty easy. A little more than some people describe it IMO. Kind of like getting a staple gun in the nuts but mostly just uncomfortable versus lots of pain. It did seem that I had a lingering pain in my balls for at least a month... like the after affect of getting racked.
Pull out method works just fine after reading that
1 minute ago, Biff Tannen said:

So five days in and this shit is still sore.  Are my nuts gonna fall off?

Do you really need them anymore?

9 minutes ago, Biff Tannen said:

So five days in and this shit is still sore.  Are my nuts gonna fall off?

I think you have full blown AIDS

On 7/10/2019 at 9:45 PM, High Plains Drifter said:

Just have some time off work,

Not sure if you used up vacation for that.  Pretty sure it qualifies as sick leave.

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